"What have you done? I... I'm… dying," the thing said.

"Cool, can you do that somewhere else?" Tony paused. His eyebrow rose up in a questioning look, “sorry, who did you say you were?" Tony inquired in an apologetic tone.

This caused the rest of the soul's body to fade away completely. The core of her being becoming fully exposed and flickering dangerously. "Please spare me! I beg you."

"I don't know how nor do I care to do that. Plus... fuck you! Now can you please leave me alone and go die somewhere else." Tony smiled at it, in no way concerned with its fate.

The light from its soul flickered even more faintly. Her soul's glow was hard to see against the light of Tony’s sun. "Please, I will serve you for all eternity. Just don't let me die." Her voice was getting softer, as if she was walking away as she continued. "All you have to do is claim me as our own."

Suddenly a glowing blue box of text appeared in Tony's vision, moving with him when he tried to get it out of his way. It was nothing fancy looking, almost exactly like an old computer operating system error box. Stopping his head wiggling, Tony took the time to read it.

You have won a soul duel!

The being known as Lucinda has agreed to be your faithful servant in perpetuity should you choose to let her live.

Let her die?

Yes? / No?

Tony was about to hit yes when he thought better of it. Tony, fate’s plaything at this point, decided he could get what information he could from the thing and then kill it. No, he thought at the box, causing the selection to be highlighted briefly before disappearing. Tony was not prepared for the consequences of his hastily formed plan.

As soon as the blue box dissipated, Lucinda's soul shot forward, slamming into Tony’s own, and for the first time since his death, Tony felt pain. Pain more intense than anything he had ever known in his life, including being stood up at prom. He heard Lucinda screaming in pain but was too focused on his own misery to tell her to keep it down.

***

Tony got used to the pain after a time, stopping his screaming long enough to contact Lucinda. Though, after an unknown amount of time trying to calm her down and stop the screaming, Tony snapped. This, of course, produced nothing productive and only resulted in more time wasted. By the time they got under control enough to speak to one another, ten months, six days, and eight hours later, EST, the pain had ended. Which, of course, was nothing more than a blink of the eye in the void.

One would think spending that much time in that much pain would draw together two beings on a profoundly deep emotional, physical, and spiritual level. In fact, on a spiritual level, they were bonded. For Tony, however, that was as deep as the connection went. "I knew I should have just let you die. I would ask why you didn't warn me, but I answered my own question, huh." He looked at her projected body, her overly aggressive attitude back on full display.

"No shit, asshole! Still can't believe some random-ass lost soul managed to beat me." Lucinda muttered to herself.

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"Whatever. I honestly couldn't care less about your ego. What are you anyway?" Tony spat out, utterly disgusted by Lucinda.

"Rude! Really, have some class, man. You fucking ignorant slob." She replied with surreal dignity.

"Were you trying to be funny? Cause it wasn't clear, and humor, well never mind. Just do me a favor and think about the word timing. Okay? So, you going to answer my question?" Tony inquired, in a tone that implied it would be talked about whether she wanted to answer or not.

"I am a soul like you. What, you think you were the only one?" Lucinda said with a full-belly laugh filled with scorn.

"Don't know that I ever thought about it.” Tony started with a snarl before a trace of insanity tore his mind away from all thoughts of her. “Suddenly, here I was, with no idea how. Then a red neon sign showed up that read: Do not panic. You are dead.” His insanity-filled eye’s stared straight into Lucinda’s soul as Tony continued. “Honestly, once everything set in, I only wanted to stay sane." Tony shrugged his shoulders, the sun of his solar system shining off both of them as the three mindless worlds orbited it.

"Yeah, you're a lost soul dipshit. That's the sign all the lost get. Kind of a last goodwill gesture before an eternity of blackness is all that's left. Though most choose oblivion over the void." Lucinda stopped talking, internally debating whether to keep going or not. "Fuck it," she muttered.

"I came down here to investigate a strange energy signature. Turns out it was yours. This was my first field assignment. It was supposed to be easy." Lucinda blew a hair out of her face in frustration. "I was told it was a broken sign. It happens from time to time. A soul will pop," she made a popping noise with her mouth as she said it, "when it can't process that it's dead. The spiritual energy hits the sign, and wham fucks the poor sign right up." Lucinda clapped her hands at wham. She was slowly loosening up, her relief at being alive worming its way out of her frigid demeanor. Becoming more animated as she spoke.

"Okay. Why am I a lost soul, though?" Tony mocked, in an imitation of her voice. Not really concerned with other lost souls' experience but was compelled to understand his situation. "Also, I could have faded into oblivion?" He wondered aloud, never before even thinking that was an option.

"It's sad, really." She scoffed a cold, bitter sound that matched the sad look in her eye. "Lost souls are beings whom nobody ever knew they died. Somehow those pathetic unloved losers fall through the spiritual gaps of reality, landing in the void." She gestured to the vast nothingness of their surroundings as she finished. Rudeness was so ingrained that Lucinda didn’t even realize she had insulted Tony, who, embarrassed, noticed immediately.

"Of course, you could have stopped existing. That’s kind of the void’s thing." Lucinda rapidly shook her head at Tony, a look of pure misery on her face. "Been better for everyone if you had, in fact." She sighed, turning her back to him.

"Cool." Tony tried but failed to act as if the statement had no effect on him. "So no one even knew I died, huh" he paused, thinking about it. “Must have been something that destroyed my wallet and body,” he murmured to Lucinda’s back. His mind going into overdrive, thinking of ways that could have happened.

The fact was, both his wallet and body were nothing but ash when firefighters searched the house, finding no trace of an occupant. The gas explosion had produced temperatures so hot that not even his teeth were left to identify him. And because he was renting under the table, his landlord didn't even know his real name, only his nickname. Tony hadn't been in touch with any of his family in years. So it was a shock to precisely no one that they didn't know. Still, even he had to agree it was pretty sad that no one knew he was dead. It was almost as if he had never existed. He took consolation in the thought that he now knew how lost souls came into existence. This thought, regrettable, was untrue. Tony had a vague idea of how lost souls come into being. Any other sentiment was just over-exaggeration.

"Anyway, I just work in maintenance. I drew the short straw, being the NFG. Next thing I know,” Lucinda giggled like the honeybadger she was. “I catch you playing with yourself." Lucinda turned toward him, flashing a wicked eyewink his way.

"Laugh it up, succubus, you're stuck with me now." Tony saltily replied, still a little sore over the loser comment.

"Fuck. I forgot," Lucinda trailed off before turning her back to Tony once more.

After a few minutes of some of the most tension-filled silence the void had ever known, Tony spoke. "Alright… So I am going to go kill some shit." Tony gave a discreet two-finger salute to her backside before taking control of his mage ogre, or as he was known on, what he assumed to be Friday nights, Ter-Ore, The Dark Lord.

Tony knew instantly that Lucinda was next to him. "Fuck!’ He yelled in shock. The startled bass of his voice deep enough to rattle her chest. “Seriously, do you have to come with me?" He begged, knowing the answer.

"You know full well that I do dipshit," she stated, with a defeated tone, her back still turned to Tony.

"Yeah, thought as much," Tony said aloud as he exited the toon. "Okay, just so I know, how much are we actually connected… bonded, might be a better term.” He finished in a mumble. “Either way, what are the requirements? Restrictions? Anything else I would need to know about?" Tony questioned the back of Lucinda's head.

Lucinda's face was violently squeezed in bright red fury as she forcefully tried to keep her mouth shut. Unfortunately, being identified as the indentured one in their relationship, she had no choice but to answer him.

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