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Jet Force Isekai
Chapter 13: Too Many Cooks In The Kitchen

Chapter 13: Too Many Cooks In The Kitchen

When Judd woke on Friday morning, exactly thirty-six days to the day when he’d arrived in this ruined land, it took some time for him to realize why he felt so excited. His muscles were tensed up in anticipation.

And then when he opened his eyes, he remembered.

Here we are. Today’s the day!

Butterfree flew around Judd’s stomach, boring tiny holes in his esophagus as he pondered what that meant. But any nerves he might have possessed were short-lived when he reminded himself that today was the day.

If all four of them passed their missions today, the tenants of Cabin Gemini would return to the same status as the other players of this most dangerous game. All they had to do was make the grade.

So Judd got up and brushed his teeth, bouncing on the balls of his feet as he did so. Sophie soon followed him. Despite the row they’d had last night about prayer, she moved with a sort of levity, even smiling, as though she felt just as relieved as Judd did.

“I wonder what they’ll assign us,” Marie remarked as Judd walked out of the bathroom.

“I don’t know,” Judd responded. “But whatever it is, we’re going to crush it. How bad can it possibly be?”

Of course, Judd knew better than to jinx the universe - excuse me, God . If you showed too much confidence that God wouldn’t mess up your plans, then the Heavenly Father would only have more reason to throw a monkey wrench into the machine. After all, the road to hell was paved with good intentions.

Judd and his bunkmates left the cabin and trekked uphill to the dining pavilion. During this walk, the forever-young man kept glancing at the ceiling, something he’d been doing repeatedly ever since that fateful night three weeks ago.

We’re being watched. Maybe not by everyone, maybe not for very long. But the whole world of Nexus is going to know how we do on this mission.

The Butterfree were now carnivorous, boring giant holes into the lining of his stomach. Before long Judd would have massive internal bleeding and collapse to the ground, soon fading into the post-afterlife.

I shouldn’t be so nervous. My optimism is justified. I’m not crazy; I’m confident.

But something about the stakes being so high really got to Judd, and he found his legs quaking as he sat down at the picnic table near the spot Mizar had selected until three weeks ago. At this point, much like the prayers he sent to God above, Judd knew Michael Rainsford wasn’t going to come back. Unless he got banished, Judd would never see Mizar again, and maybe not even then. It certainly wasn’t worth deliberately getting evicted just to see him.

Still, I wonder how Mizar is coping in the Eternal Night Mine. I hope he’s okay.

Judd didn’t have much time to wonder, because breakfast sausages, strawberries, and a raspberry cream cheese croissant appeared on each plate. After processing that this selection of food would have likely made his old friend flip out, Judd scarfed it down like a wild animal. And once everyone else had finished, the slips of paper were passed out like always.

I wonder who I’ll be with. Hopefully it’s Jessica - as annoying as she can be when she flaunts her privilege and complains about the conditions here, I think I work best with her.

Judd was too afraid to look at his paper until his partner(s) showed up next to him. And show up they did - three young women.

“I’m with all three of you? ”

Marie nodded. “It would appear so - that’s what our papers say.”

“But that’s pretty…I just wouldn’t think the four of us would get along when we’re all in the same party. That sounds like a surefire recipe for having too many cooks in the kitchen.”

Sophie rolled her eyes. “Judd, you know this as well as I do - that’s the point. Didn’t I lay it all out three weeks ago?”

Of course, Judd realized with a sickening feeling in his lower intestine. They’re not going to let us pass too freely just because. They want drama, and they’re going to get it.

“They want us to bicker,” Marie said softly. “Let’s not play their game.”

Judd glared at her. “Uh, Marie, we’re literally in a game.”

“You know what, Judd? It doesn’t matter that this is a reality show. Just because things are a certain way doesn’t mean they ought to be that way. You might want Jesus to save you from your sins, but that doesn’t mean he’s going to. He didn’t when he had the chance.”

“Don’t remind me.”

In any case, the drinks were once again distributed. The ones handed to Judd and Jessica were bright green, whereas the ones meant for Marie and Sophie were fiery orange.

Judd frowned. “I guess I’m going to be a Grass-type today.”

“Hey, at least you’re not going to drink the Fire” Sophie responded coolly. “You’ve gotta look on the bright side, Judd.”

“Right,” the young man responded. And really, it could be a lot worse - the taste of the Grass drink reminded him of that time he’d tried eating grass when he was four or five years old. Luckily, an adult had stopped him from doing so before he ate enough to necessitate getting his stomach pumped. At least the drink didn’t burn his throat or electrify his insides.

The ruins soon faded from view, to be replaced by the instructions for the mission. No matter how many times Judd had been Isekai’d, he still needed to read the directions carefully - that would not change, especially not now.

SYLLABUS FOR MISSION 6: SEARCH & RESCUE

YOU ARE: JUDD ASGARD (LEAFEON)

YOUR PARTNERS ARE: JESSICA PETTY (MEOWSCARADA), MARIE EMERSON (PONYTA), SOPHIE FREY (CHARMANDER)

OBJECTIVES:

* TRAVERSE THE FOREST AND DEFEAT BEARTIC (20 POINTS)

* CLIMB THROUGH SLIDE ZONE WITHOUT LOSING ANY MEMBERS (36 POINTS)

* SUMMIT THE MOUNTAIN (12 POINTS)

* RESCUE MISMAGIUS FROM ITS CHAINS (32 POINTS)

ADDITIONAL STIPULATION: FOR EACH TEAMMATE LOST IN THE SLIDE ZONE, 12 POINTS WILL BE DEDUCTED; IF ALL FOUR TEAMMATES ARE BURIED, THE MISSION ENDS.)

SAY MISSION NAME TO CONTINUE.

Well, that wasn’t too complicated, was it? All they had to do was make it through the forest, climb a mountain, and release a Mismagius from its chains. Simple enough on paper!

Of course, on paper was the only place in which the mission seemed “simple enough.” After Judd said “Search and rescue” and his surroundings came into view, he realized that this landscape was no place for a Grass-type or a Fire-type. In fact, no grass was visible, and any fire would have been snuffed out almost immediately by the howling wind.

Judd found himself as a quadrupedal creature in the middle of a winter wonderland. The deep blue sky contained a weak winter sun, but soon the Leafeon realized that this was a curse, not a blessing. There was, after all, a reason why skiers were told to apply sunscreen under their eyes before the day’s first run.

The snow was blindingly white, and Judd was forced to squint. Despite the brightness, the temperature was absolutely freezing, and the frequent wind gusts didn’t help matters.

As Judd’s teammates, a fellow Grass-type and two Fire-types came into view, he understood more than ever why they were assigned these specific Types. Some would say it was “super-effective” at creating drama!

“Okay, guys,” Judd announced. “Follow me.”

Sophie the Charmander grunted. “I don’t know who elected you the leader, but it certainly wasn’t me!”

“Well then,” the Leafeon responded, “who wants to be the leader if it isn’t me?”

“Nobody,” Marie the Ponyta growled, “ because we’re a team. We don’t have all day to argue about who’s the head of the quest!”

“That’s what we’re doing now” Sophie observed. “We should just suck it up and climb the damn mountain.”

Sure enough, a mountain of probably two thousand vertical feet or so stood in front of them. It wasn’t terribly impressive by the standard the Rockies set, but it was still a very steep face that would require plenty of stamina to scale. The tree line ended about three-fifths of the way up the mountain - after that it was just snow, ice, and rock.

“Okay then,” Jessica replied. “Have it your way. I’ll lead the way if nobody else will.”

Sophie grumbled a bit, but nonetheless they got in line behind the Meowscarada. But then…

“Actually,” Sophie said, “I’m the slowest one here, since they gave me such stubby legs. I think I should go in front to set the pace.”

The Meowscarada didn’t exactly look happy, but she at least seemed to understand where the Charmander came from. Sophie took the lead once more, seemingly neutering Marie’s opinion that there shouldn’t be a leader.

Judd sighed as he glanced at the nearby forest. If Cabin Gemini was already at it again, engaging in a verbal melee with one another over something so trivial, then they were in trouble. Early trouble. Which, of course, was just what the audience wanted to see.

Well, we’re here now. We have to succeed at all costs, because if we don’t, we all know what happens.

The trek continued through the increasingly deep snow, and soon the sun was thrown behind the curtains of the pine forest canopy. Judd was panting before long from the effort of stepping in and out of the white stuff - at some points it was more like swimming than walking.

There’s another step in the middle of the forest, though, Judd recalled. There was that species…a Beartic, was it called?

After about twenty minutes (though Judd wasn’t the best judge of time without a clock), the world stood still. The air seemed to grow artificially silent, as though some unknown force were suppressing all the noise in the forest.

“Did you hear that?” Sophie asked.

Marie glared at the Charmander. “I didn’t hear anything! What was there to hear?”

“That’s the thing. It seems like these woods are a lot quieter than they should be. And that’s just not right! Usually there’d be all sorts of critters chirping and making the forest seem alive!”

“I don’t care,” Jessica muttered. “I’m cold already, and I’m only going to get colder if we stand still.”

Suddenly, a tree fell to the ground about fifty yards in front of the group, making a dull thud as its landing was cushioned by the abundant snow cover. Even though he knew it was no threat, Judd still flinched.

Marie shivered. “We could have been…right under that.”

“No shit, Marie!” Sophie exclaimed. “But we weren’t! We’re safe now!”

As it turned out, however, one of the dumbest things you could do on a quest was to proudly proclaim that you were safe. Simply put, that could be seen as “tempting fate”, which was never wise.

Because at that very moment, a giant bear-like creature with white and light blue fur came barrelling out of a nearby clearing, holding a small log in its right arm like a sword.

“It’s a Beartic!” Sophie shouted. “Yell as loud as you can!”

Judd tried to remember why Sophie was giving that instruction. Apparently making your voice heard (literally) was the best way to make an ursine creature fear you, and therefore render it more likely that the creature would flee rather than chase after its would-be prey.

So Judd reached within himself and let out a yelp. However, this was not enough to dissuade the Beartic from charging at the party, lashing out with its claws.

“Sophie, use Fire Fang!” Marie yelled. “That should be its weakness, right?”

The Charmander readied her arms, taking a stance common among someone who was about to throw a Frisbee. But when she lashed out, only a very small flame exited her paw.

“Let me handle this!” Judd exclaimed, trying to remember what moves Leafeon could use. Unfortunately, a lifetime of neglecting Pokémon cards was unexpectedly taking its toll right now.

“Use Leech Seed, Judd!” Marie shouted. “Clancy would know!”

Why does she still care so much about Clancy?

Judd did not know how to conjure a Leech Seed, nor precisely what that move did. He could at least guess, though, and circumstances forced his hand. He needed to trust Marie.

Hopping out of the way, Judd readied what he thought was a Leech Seed. Meanwhile, the Beartic jabbed the small pine tree at Jessica, who dodged just in time. Marie wasn’t so lucky, and she was bowled off her Ponyta hooves to land in a heap in the white stuff.

Judd wasted no more time, launching a Leech Seed into the Beartic’s back. The ursine Pokémon clearly hadn’t expected this, because the move hit its target with ease. The Beartic stumbled, then turned around and began slashing wildly at Judd.

The Leafeon could move quickly when he needed to, but even Judd’s agility had its limits. His legs ached before long, and with every abrupt leap he needed to make, they felt even more jelly-like. But it would all be worth it, since the cost of failure was so steep.

I must defeat this Beartic. I must avoid banishment. Anything else is secondary.

Slowly but surely, however, the ursine creature’s movements slowed down. He was still swinging his tree sword wildly, but every motion looked almost sluggish, as though they were all underwater.

“The Leech Seed is working!” Marie exclaimed. “Good job, Judd!”

Can’t rest on my laurels yet. I need to close the deal first!

Judd used Tail Whip on the Beartic, but the creature dodged with ease. Even so, it seemed that their enemy would not be able to keep this up forever. It now lumbered around the clearing, moving like someone suffering from severe arthritis. But it wasn’t done yet.

The Beartic leaned back and unleashed another attack. Only later would Judd learn that this was Frost Breath, a move that had the potential to freeze an opponent to the spot if sufficient power was used to unleash said move.

A giant cloud of teal-colored gas enveloped the clearing, and it was only Marie yelling “DUCK!” that saved three of them from being encased in a giant block of ice.

Sophie wasn’t so swift; she understood too late. An icy stalagmite grew from the ground, rising high enough to contain the Charmander, whose eyes were still wide open. As soon as it finished unleashing this attack, the Beartic collapsed to the ground, the Leech Seed evidently having worked exactly as intended.

Unfortunately, so had the Frost Breath.

Judd rushed to Sophie’s side. As stated above, the Charmander was encased in a block of ice, totally still. She stared unblinking, possibly unseeing, at Jessica.

The Leafeon’s heart sank. There was usually only one reason why someone’s eyes would be open yet not acknowledge you. And that reason was because…

“I don’t think she’s breathing!” Judd gasped.

“Then light a fire, you idiot!” Jessica shouted at Marie. “Get her out of there!”

The Ponyta reared its hind legs and spat out an Ember at the ice block. Despite the fact that fire should have been super-effective against ice, it still took far too long for the stalagmite to melt. As soon as said ice block had become nothing but a puddle in the midst of already-wet snow, Sophie fell to the ground, gasping for breath.

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“That…is…not…fun” she wheezed.

“I’m sorry I didn’t warn you sooner,” Marie muttered, “but next time, maybe you should be a little faster at ducking to the ground!”

Sophie rolled her eyes. “That’s…quite…the non-apology there” she said in between gasps.

“Yeah, don’t blame the victim” Jessica responded. “Or rather - don’t hate the player, hate the game.”

“This game sucks,” Sophie stated, catching her breath once more. “If I’m being honest, I want out - “.

“No, you don’t!” the other three exclaimed in unison.

The Charmander narrowed her eyes. “I know I don’t want what being out entails. I’m just saying, this is the worst mission I’ve been part of in my almost seven months here.”

“Stop complaining, Sophie,” Marie retorted. “That’s Jessica’s job.”

Jessica raised her voice as she responded thusly: “Leave me out of this.”

“We can’t, as much as we might like to,” Marie told her. “We’re a team. All four of us were put together today, and all four of us are going to destroy our high scores. We. Will. Be. Okay!”

“Do you want today’s mission to be the highest-rated episode of Jet Force Isekai this season?” Judd muttered. “Because that’s exactly how you make it that way.”

The three female Pokémon looked as though they were about to continue arguing, but they quickly backed off, probably realizing that such an argument wasn’t worth it.

“Anyway,” Judd pointed out, “we’ve completed one of our objectives. That Beartic isn’t going to wake up anytime soon, if at all.”

That’s one down. But the next thing we have to do is get through the “slide zone”...does that mean what I think it means?

The quartet trekked through the forest for a few more minutes before reaching a steep slope with what seemed to be loosely packed snow. Judd had never been skiing in the backcountry - he’d always stuck to the resort, simply because he did not have the fancy equipment necessary. However, he knew without needing to think too hard that the thing he’d dreaded had come to pass.

“We should be careful when we walk up that slope,” Judd told the group. “I think you all know why, right?”

Jessica nodded. “My sister Rachel went on many off-piste ski trips, and she always told me about how they needed to wear these transceivers - she called them beacons. If she got buried, it would make it easier for one of their companions to locate her.”

“That’s right,” the Leafeon told the Meowscarada, nodding in turn at his other two teammates. “Once you’re beneath the fallen snow from the avalanche, it’s basically impossible to dig yourself out. Surviving it comes down to luck, and whoever tries to dig you out had better be quick.”

“Well then,” Marie muttered, “I think it’s better if we avoid setting it off in the first place.”

Judd peered toward the sunny sky, surveying the path and noting that it was devoid of trees, gates, or anything that could stop the river of snow if it came. On some level, he acknowledged that it was viscerally satisfying to have knowledge his bunkmates didn’t for once. Just because I’m from the Midwest doesn’t mean I’m an airhead.

“I don’t know if it’s possible to avoid triggering the avalanche” the Leafeon stated grimly, providing a stark contrast in mood between the air and the ground. “Instead, our goal must be to get out of the way whenever you hear a rumble, and if we can’t escape the path, try to swim through it!”

Judd glanced at Sophie the Charmander, who, come to think of it, hadn’t spoken for a while. Her gaze remained fixated on what lay above them.

“Well?” the Leafeon said. “There’s nothing to do but climb. And we’ll be ready for whatever comes barreling down at us.”

So climbing is exactly what the team did, choosing to make zigzag motions to conserve energy on the steep slope. Before long Judd’s entire body was caked in sweat, and the rough part about sweating with fur was that the perspiration wouldn’t leave your fur. Ew. And because it was still cold out, he’d be shivering before long due to the moisture.

Still, they were making progress. Slowly, but it was progress nonetheless. As Judd’s legs turned to the consistency of a Ditto’s gelatinous body, and his lungs felt like he’d been playing the bagpipes for an hour straight, he glanced down and realized they were more than halfway up.

As nice as it would have been to have Mizar the alpinist with them, the Leafeon allowed some hope to spring within him. He was not naïve to the dangers of this environment. But if they’d come this far without much trouble, maybe the avalanche wouldn’t happen at all.

And then the rumbling started, sounding as though a beast that had been sleeping for many years had suddenly woken up and wasn’t thrilled about it. This time, there was no question - it wasn’t a Beartic in the forest.

“Run!” Judd shouted, but it might have been too late. A tidal wave of snow came rushing down the mountain like a waterfall. Anything in its path would be swept away without a second thought, just another piece of flotsam amid the sea of ice.

The Leafeon scampered out of the avalanche’s path, just barely able to reach the edge before the cascading snow swept him off his feet. He closed his eyes and mouth, determined not to swallow any of the white stuff or suffer from snow blindness, apparently a thing when the sun was this bright.

I’m going to be pinned to the ground! I’m going to a snowy grave!

Wait! I still remember that phrase! “Search and rescue” is all I need to say, and then I’ll be out of here! That would be the selfish thing to do…

…which is why I can’t do it. I can’t abandon my teammates like that. Would I want them to treat ME as though I’m disposable? Besides, this is just a simulation, but if we fail, the Eternal Night Mine is very real indeed!

Almost as suddenly as the avalanche had begun, the snow settled into a firm consistency. And as a familiar Meowscarada “sprinted” frantically toward Judd, the Leafeon knew time was of the essence.

“We have fifteen minutes at best to find them,” Jessica panted. “If we don’t, then we’ll probably fail, and I don’t plan on failing.”

The avalanche path was now blanketed in enough snow and ice to probably form a glacier. It occurred to Judd then that Marie and Sophie might be anywhere in that expanse of white stuff, and as Jessica had already said, they didn’t have much time.

“We’d better start digging!”

A Leafeon may have been a poor choice for such terrain, not that Judd had been given any choice. That being said, he was amazed at how quickly his Grass-type paws carved through the snow like it was half-melted butter. Before long, he’d excavated a hole probably three feet deep and three feet around on all sides. (Jessica, meanwhile, selected a space ten feet further down the mountain.)

I see a hoof there!

Far from resting on his laurels, this only galvanized Judd to keep digging, faster and faster, uncovering as much of the Ponyta’s body as he could find. With every speck of fur that became visible, the Leafeon’s paws scavenged even faster.

Finally, Marie’s face was visible. It had turned a mild shade of periwinkle, but she was still conscious and breathing.

But her face was far from happy.

“Why couldn’t you have…uncovered my…face first?” Marie remarked in between gasps. “It was…so hard…to breathe!”

“I wasn’t thinking,” Judd admitted. “But there’s no time to waste - we’ve got to get Sophie now!”

Ten feet down the mountain, the Meowscarada had uncovered what looked like a Charmander’s tail, its flame having been extinguished by the snow. It was then that Judd’s throat grew hot as he raced down to assist.

“She probably can’t breathe!” the Leafeon all but wailed. “God can never forgive me!”

“Shut up and dig, you idiot!” Jessica jeered.

Maybe Jessica and I don’t get along as well as I’d hoped. Oh well, it was nice clinging to that fantasy while I still could.

Judd unleashed all of his physical power in the effort, which bore fruit when they’d unearthed enough of Sophie’s body to fish her out of the snow. Somehow, the Charmander was still breathing, though her face was blue from the lack of oxygen in that icy crypt.

“Yeah,” she gasped, “I’d rather not do that again.”

“The good news is,” Jessica announced, “that we don’t have to. We’re almost at the top of the mountain, and then we can rescue Mismagius.”

“Wait a minute, though,” Marie pointed out. “Mismagius is a Ghost-type, right? That’s what Cl-...what my friend taught me back on Earth.”

Sophie shot Marie a slight glare, clearly taking note of that Freudian slip. But she didn’t say anything else.

“The point is,” Marie continued, “I’m sure Mismagius can teleport out of here just like us, except that he isn’t part of this mission, so he wouldn’t go back to Jet Force Isekai.”

“Why should that matter?” Jessica wondered aloud. “Does it mean that we don’t need to rescue him?”

Marie’s next expression defied clean categorization. She didn’t look happy at all, but there was a slight trace of…was it hope? (To be clear, the main word associated with that frown was despondent.)

“No, we still need to” Marie stated. “There’s been something preventing it from teleporting away from the mountain, which is why we have to save it.”

On that illuminating note, the trek continued, Sophie leading the way for the last few hundred vertical feet before the summit. Judd tried to step more carefully from this point forward. Maybe it wouldn’t prevent a future avalanche, but part of the Leafeon just wanted to avoid facing another one.

“Here it is,” Sophie wheezed after a while. “Here’s the summit.”

After one final push, they were there. The summit of this mountain was a simple platform about half the size of the small-town church sanctuary at which Judd had worshiped his Lord and Savior. From this vantage point, the view was incredible - forests and meadows and even a few frozen lakes could be seen. There were, however, no signs of civilization.

“This is a real place, right?” Judd asked. “It’s not computer-generated, is it?”

Sophie swiveled around and glared at the Leafeon. “How should I know? But more importantly, why do you even care? We have a job to do here!”

Sure enough, on the far end of the mountaintop, there “stood” a Mismagius tied down by a set of chains. The Ghost-type’s “hat” hung loosely on its head, rather like the cap of a mushroom. Additionally, its eyes were closed as though it were asleep or unconscious (probably the latter.)

“So we have to undo these chains?” Jessica wondered aloud.

Marie nodded. “How else would we free the Mismagius?”

“I don’t know, but this is going to hurt my paws - I might even break a nail!”

“So?” Sophie bellowed. “Does the thought of breaking a claw really mean you should be too scared to try?”

“Well, no,” the Meowscarada admitted. “But still - it’s going to hurt!”

“Not nearly as much as the hard labor in the Eternal Night Mine will” Sophie retorted. “We’ve got one last task, and then we can wake up in the ruins as though none of this happened.”

“I’ll try a Fire Spin!” Marie exclaimed, doing a pirouette atop the snow and sending a burst of flames toward the chains.

For a brief, wonderful moment, Judd thought the chains were going to catch fire and explode, allowing them to free the Mismagius. However, this did not happen - if anything, the dark metallic material that comprised the chains seemed resistant to the flames, like it could just snuff them out without warning.

“Well then,” Judd mouthed. “I guess that didn’t work.”

“No shit, Sherlock!” Sophie exclaimed. Then, turning to Marie: “I think we have to do this by brute force. Sorry, Jessica.”

The Meowscarada, seemingly remembering that her species contained the subtitle “Magician Pokémon”, held her arms out to produce a Seed Bomb. She then chucked the bomb at the chains, causing Judd and Sophie to gasp.

Well, the bomb exploded, taking with it a chunk of snow and revealing the rock that comprised the summit. But the chains remained totally intact - if anything, they seemed to have clicked even more tightly against the unconscious Mismagius.

Sophie grunted. “What did I say about brute force, Jessica?”

“That we had to use it?”

“Exactly! Don’t be all wishy-washy about what we need to do here. Our paws might bleed, but we’re going to do this if it takes all night!”

After a series of groans by Jessica, the Cabin Gemini quartet set to work on the chains. Unlike the Fire Spin Marie had used, however, there wasn’t even a second’s worth of hope in this process.

The chains did not budge. If anything, any attempt to untie the shackles from around Mismagius’ limbs and body only seemed to make said restraints heavier and more ironclad. In other words, the more they tried, the more impossible the task seemed to become.

Jessica was the first to give up, quickly stepping back from the chains. “This is impossible!” she exclaimed.

Sophie frowned. “You dug me out of the deep snow less than an hour ago, but you’re saying this is impossible?”

“Yes! I can’t make any headway!”

“Then try harder! If you were in Mismagius’ position, wouldn’t you want to be freed?”

“Yes, but that doesn’t matter if we can’t free him!”

Judd sighed. He could sense where this was going. However, in hindsight, he realized he should have figured it out sooner. His stomach sank to the bottom of Nexus.

“Ladies,” he said, “I think Jessica might be right.”

“Well, she isn’t!” Sophie all but shouted. “This is Jet Force Isekai, and they’re not going to give us anything we can’t possibly do!”

Judd shook his head. “Jessica told me that five weeks ago when I did my first mission on that farm. And yeah, it’s a nice thing to believe, but there’s only one problem.”

Sophie rolled her eyes. “ It’s not true? Judd, considering that you believe in a virgin birth and that bread and wine literally become the body and blood of Jesus Christ, you’re one to talk!”

“Well, that doesn’t matter,” Judd replied curtly. “Believe me, I didn’t want to think this any more than any of you did. But it all makes sense when you think about it for more than a few seconds.”

Marie narrowed her eyes. “What do you mean?”

“I mean that this mission is impossible, and there’s a reason for that. We were given three weeks’ probation, and we were told that if we passed all three missions with a score of 70 or above, we would be taken off the probation list.”

“Right” Jessica mouthed worriedly. “So that means…”.

Judd nodded. “Again, I don’t like this. But I believe they made this mission extremely difficult - in fact, probably impossible - on purpose. They knew we wouldn’t be able to complete the damn challenge, and they set it for us so that we’d have no choice but to fail and get banished.”

“But we’ve completed everything else,” Jessica pointed out. “None of us were lost in the avalanche after we beat the Beartic, and then we climbed this mountain to the top. We’re only losing out on the points we would have gotten by rescuing Mismagius. It’s out of a hundred, so we could afford to lose thirty here…”.

“That’s if we did everything else perfectly” Sophie reminded her. “And they deduct a point or two for the smallest things - you know that!”

“Right.”

“But that’s not all,” Judd replied. Again, it was gratifying to explain something to his bunkmates, even if he wished it were under better circumstances. “As you said, Jessica, the maximum score you can get is 100 if you complete all the objectives correctly.”

“Right,” Jessica said again.

“Rescuing the Mismagius was worth thirty-two points” the Leafeon continued dejectedly. “That means that if we can’t save him, and I’m pretty sure we can’t, then we’re guaranteed to score under seventy. They set us up to fail, on purpose.”

And to bicker all the way, all for the audience’s entertainment. Arceus, this is just like the Hunger Games, except that we the “tributes” already suffered our violent deaths.

The truth seemed to dawn on Marie. “They knew this…was impossible?”

“I’m afraid so. But just to be safe, we should try a few more minutes…”.

Jessica shook her head. “Who are you kidding, Judd? You just told us this is impossible! What will a few more minutes of this painful effort accomplish?”

Judd sighed. The more he thought about it, the more convinced he became that the answer to that question was “nothing.”

“Well then,” Marie stated, “we might as well head back to Jet Force Isekai. It’s probably our last day there, after all - maybe we could make the most of it.”

Somehow, she doesn’t sound as upset as most Pokémon would be when they’re told that they’re going to work in the mines. I’d say that raises question marks for sure.

Judd took a deep breath. “I guess we’re really going to give up, aren’t we?”

Sophie the Charmander shot Judd the Leafeon a glare. “You’re the one saying we can’t do this.”

“Okay then,” the Leafeon responded with more courage than he’d thought he possessed. “Search and rescue.”

Immediately, the summit faded, as did any hope of Cabin Gemini fulfilling the terms of their probation one more time. Rather than black with white text, the screen Judd faced now was scarlet, with a blaring siren in the background suggesting that he had something to worry about.

MISSION 6: SEARCH & RESCUE

YOU WERE: JUDD ASGARD (LEAFEON)

YOUR PARTNERS WERE: JESSICA PETTY (MEOWSCARADA), MARIE EMERSON (PONYTA), SOPHIE FREY (CHARMANDER)

OBJECTIVE 1: 20 OF 20 POINTS - PERFECT!

OBJECTIVE 2: 36 OF 36 POINTS - PERFECT!

OBJECTIVE 3: 12 OF 12 POINTS - PERFECT!

OBJECTIVE 4: 0 OF 32 POINTS - TOTAL FAILURE.

TOTAL SCORE: 68 OF 100 POINTS - MISSION COMPLETE.

Judd recoiled at the final score. Not because he’d expected anything better, but because he’d thought for sure it would be worse. Most of the time, that 68 would have been high enough to stay another week, but the terms of their probation said otherwise.

However, it wasn’t just that. Aside from their total inability to release the Mismagius from his chains, they’d scored perfectly in everything else. That C- (which might as well have been an A from his perspective) was so close and yet so far away. The red carpet of escaping probation had been yanked out from under them, to be replaced by a bed of thorns.

This may have been just Judd’s imagination, but he felt certain that the red screen and giant block letters hung over him longer than the black screen usually did. It was almost as though the creators of this simulation game were deliberately mocking him for his failure.

I didn’t fail! You made it impossible! There’s a difference!

When Judd opened his eyes to find himself back in the ruined dining pavilion, he saw that most of the other contestants (for once the implication had been assigned to the other residents, it could not be lost) still had their eyes closed. Every once in a while, one of them would grimace, but for the most part they gave no indication that they were conscious.

They’re still in the simulation. I guess that makes sense - we ended early.

Lucas the Lucario strode over to the tenants of Cabin Gemini. His mouth was curled into a smile - there was no mistaking it for anything else.

“There’s still almost two hours left before dinner,” Lucas told the group at large. “You had more time.”

Of course, the Lucario used the past-tense form of have very deliberately. For him, it was easy enough to play the “Monday morning quarterback”, because he didn’t need to live with the consequences of their failure. He’d probably squeeze them down the drain like they were molten toothpaste, swiftly to be forgotten about.

And then Judd remembered: Lucas rigged the simulation.

At first, he didn’t feel comfortable confronting the Lucario openly. But then it occurred to Judd that he and his bunkmates had nothing to lose - they were going to be banished anyway, so he might as well wear his heart on his sleeve.

“We couldn’t do the mission,” Judd snarled. “You said there were two more hours. But it wouldn’t have mattered if we had ten more hours.”

Jessica gazed concernedly at Judd. “I don’t know if this is the best idea…”.

“Jessica, we’ve got nothing to lose. This is my banishment ceremony, and I’ll do what I want to.”

The Lucario raised an eyebrow. “So you were unable to complete the task. Some in your generation would call that a skill issue. Why would your inability to rescue the Mismagius result in blaming me for your failures?”

“Because you rigged it,” Judd snapped. The girls gazed at him skeptically, but Judd jabbed a finger toward Lucas’ chest spike. “And I don’t care how much trouble I get in. As far as I’m concerned, I’m already in maximum trouble.”

“You’re willing to take one for the team, aren’t you?” Lucas sneered. “Well, Judd, playing missionary isn’t going to save your friends in this case. Tell me, who was responsible for the defeat?”

“You!” Judd bellowed. “You made sure we couldn’t save the Mismagius! The chains were ironclad!”

Lucas wiggled one of his aura-sensing organs, and then the pain began.

Here was the pattern: At first Judd’s joints ached as though he had the flu, then the dull pain gradually grew sharper over a period of ten seconds. Then there was a burst of inconceivable, white-hot agony for another twenty seconds, during which Judd could barely keep from screaming - he had to close his eyes in order to tolerate it, and even then, I use the word “tolerate” loosely. And then he’d get a handful of seconds of “reprieve” before the discomfort escalated into pain once more.

This torment continued for what must have been several minutes, though it might as well have been several hours. When it finally stopped, Judd once more opened his eyes, scared to glance at his body for fear of seeing how it had been mangled by the invisible knives.

“Don’t bother looking for scars,” Lucas snapped. “There aren’t any. Aura Torture doesn’t leave any physical marks on the victim. But that’s not why I used it.”

Jessica gritted her teeth. “So you’re trying to make an example of him?”

Lucas shrugged. “Why the hell not? He just accused me of rigging the mission!” (Notably, Lucas did not use the word game. Did that mean anything? Maybe, maybe not.)

“But,” Judd gasped as the residual aches from the Aura Torture finally receded, “you’re already going to get rid of us. Are you going to nail me to the cross like Jesus?”

“Not everything is about Jesus, Judd Asgard” Lucas muttered. “Stop thinking that you’re some sort of martyr, because you’re not. You’re going to be sent Elsewhere and people here will forget about you. You’ll meet with the fate you deserve, quite frankly.”

The Lucario did not say this part aloud, but Judd knew without needing to ask that the fate they deserved was a terrible fate indeed.

The human quartet and Lucario stared one another down for a solid minute before Lucas finally sighed.

“Look,” Lucas said more calmly, “I said you four had some extra time. Which is true. You should feel free to go back to your cabins and…do whatever you need to do.”

“You mean, put our affairs in order? ” Marie wondered aloud. “And by the way, the forgetting part isn’t true. I haven’t forgotten about Clancy.”

At the mention of Clancy, Lucas stiffened up, but he ultimately sighed once more. “I suppose you could say that. Of course, it’s not like you have many affairs to put in order. But whatever.”

On that cheery note, the quartet elected to leave Lucas behind for the time being. They did not, however, go back to their cabin - staying near the pavilion was Judd’s idea. “They’re going to toss us out anyway, so we’ve got nothing to hide ” was his exact reasoning.

“So what’s going on, Judd?” Sophie asked with an eye roll. “Are you going to come up with some cockamamie plan to sacrifice yourself to save the rest of us? Or save all of us?”

Judd sighed. “I’ve got a concept of a plan, you could say…”.

Marie shook her head as she interrupted him. “Nope. I don’t want to hear it. If you don’t have a concrete plan, you could just be honest with us. And an idea doesn’t count as a plan - there’s a difference.”

“Okay then,” Judd admitted. “I was kidding. I don’t have a plan; I don’t even have an idea.”

The girls appeared morose but hardly surprised, and Judd grew convinced that he was about to experience the longest hour of his afterlife.

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