Her name is Yu Fen.
Today, it was her duty to dust the artifacts.
She began her work inside of a warehouse. When she opened the doors to the warehouse, a wave of ancient Qi rolled forth, punching her in the face as if saying ‘You are approaching me, the ancient one?’.
Along the walls, placed on pedestals, were pottery, carvings, and other miscellaneous things. This room contained precious artifacts that were created by cultivators that had managed to ascend to immortality. The room also contained memorabilia of cultivators who had made great contributions to the sect, yet had failed their immortal tribulation.
Basically, this room contained a bunch of nick-knacks created by powerful people that had no use. All that these ‘artifacts’ had going for them was that they all contained Qi.
Yu Fen began to dust the objects with a duster created from the feathers of a sweet siren goose. It is a bizarre, large creature that lures people into their soft feathers and then proceeded to smother them to death with their fluffiness.
She began to hum a tune to herself as she worked.
“Aand, done! Oh, almost forgot that last one.”
On the sect grounds, in a forest, there was a painting that had yet to be dusted. The painting was often forgotten about, for it was truly old, almost as old as the sect itself, which had fifty thousand years of history.
She did not know why the painting remained outside to this day, instead of being protected from the weather inside the warehouse with the rest. But like many others before her, she gave up worrying about it. The painting showed no sign of degradation after this many years, so what's the point of worrying? The painting was treated as simply part of the scenery in the forest by this point.
That was why when she arrived to dust it, she let out a squeak of surprise.
“Sqeu! Wha, what happened?”
In the middle of the painting, where there used to be a painting of a black carp swimming up a crystal clear waterfall, there was now a large splatter of black ink, with a white outline of a carp in the middle of this splatter.
“I, I, I have to report this!”
She shot off towards the sect office located near the base of the mountain in the distance. She reinforced her legs with Qi and she traveled even faster, crossing the ground as fast as the wind.
-
(Splat)
(Splat)
Ugh, how far away is water. How long do I need to travel?
I lift my tail and bring it down once more.
(Splat)
Oh? I think I hear a little tinkle tinkle of water ahead.
I lift my head to listen, and indeed, there is the tinkling of water in the distance.
Yes! Onwards!
(Splat)
(Caw)
Hmm? Are my ears playing tricks on me? I could have sworn I just heard a noise that sent shivers down my spine.
My Spine!?
Who dares?! I am the great and mighty carp, descendant of dragons! What manner of foul beast could send shivers down MY spine?! Hmm? Show yourself so that I may smack you with my back end, just as you deserve nothing better!
(Caw)
Hehg, there it is again.
YOU DARE!
Come! Face me!
At that moment, a shadow passes over my body.
You know what? I shall allow you to live today. Yes. It was a hard decision, but I am forgiving! Oh, how the strong pity the weak. Well now, I shall be on my way, and you, stay out of trouble. Goodbye!
(Caw)
Well, I!
…
Very well. I will give you a second chance, for you are so weak that you fail to grasp the difference in power between us.
I shall accept your song as a defeated bow.
(Caw)
Great! Now, I will be on my way!
(Splat)
I look upwards once more. And what do I find? A fucking huge bird swooping down trying to grab me.
You! I have forgiven you twice! Twice! Yet you still seek me out!? Very well. Due to my grand disposition, I shall… Allow a third apology at a later date. Unfortunately, I have urgent business to attend to, Toodle loo.
I dodge the claws closing in on me by the thinnest of margins by thrashing my body to the side. The claws close on nothing as the bird rises and circles around for another dive.
I turn my tail into overdrive as I urgently slap the ground, getting closer and closer to the water source I heard.
The bird dives again. I quickly try to maneuver myself behind a tree close by, but it is for naught.
The claws dig into me, causing tremendous pain. I can feel my consciousness begin to flicker. As I rise off the ground my mind sinks deeper into the abyss that is unconsciousness.
Then I feel a tearing sensation as the bird's claws rip right through me without much resistance and my body begins to fall with my mind.
Stolen novel; please report.
Oh, right. Zero defense to the point of being as soft as a block of butter left out in the noonday sun. I literally slid off that fucking bird's claws! At least my end is honorable-ish. Thy has beaten me, pseudo ruler of the skies.
With that last thought, I succumb to the darkness.
-
A red wind eagle was sitting on a branch high in the canopy of a spruce tree. This was a beast in the early Qi gathering stage of beast cultivation. It had little intelligence, but still more than common animals.
Below, it had spotted a strange black blob. The blob was moving towards a river nearby, flinging itself through the air to move. The eagle had a vague idea of what the creature could be, a fish, its favourite food.
It leapt into the air, eager for its next meal.
(Caw)
Its mighty cry froze the pathetic fish below it.
It swooped in to catch the pathetic creature, but it dodged!
The eagle rose again then dived and finally caught the fish.
It began to rise in triumph while holding its prey, but suddenly its claws ripped through the fish and it dropped to the ground.
(Caw?)
Were the eagle's claws always that sharp? It did not dwell on the matter and began to make another pass at the fish.
But suddenly, it felt pain at its feet. The eagle looked down, but to its shock did not find blood, but some strange, viscous black substance that began to slowly soak into the eagle's skin and claws.
The red wind eagle abandoned its prey and quickly flew to the river. It landed near the shore and tried to wash off the strange black substance. But to its surprise once more, it wouldn't wash off.
(Caw)
The eagle cried out in distress as the black substance seemed to stain its feet black. The substance continued to worm its way deeper, finally touching on something precious deep within the eagle that it did not even realize it possessed until this moment when the black substance proceeded to stain that as well.
(Caw!)
The eagle cried out in distress as it felt its very identity being stained partially. It flew back to its nest, utterly terrified by that blob masquerading as a fish.
-
Ah?
Oh my god. I’m ALIVE!
HAHAHA!
I am the greatest! That bird must have fled once it knew it couldn't possibly beat ME! Hmm. BUT! Although that bird fled before my majesty, the fact remains. I went unconscious again. That is a real problem. I am a cultivating beast, should I not have enhanced strength? Why am I so soft? Just what exactly is that Qi enhancing inside my body? The Qi must be strengthening some aspect of my body.
It is decided. I must find some way to enhance my defense. I WILL find some way to enhance my defense! Because, I, AM, THE GREATEST!!
Now, let's skedaddle before that bird gets too overwhelmed by my majesty.
(Splat)
(Splash)
Oh, baby! That! Feels good.
Mmh. So this is what it's like to swim, huh? Very nice.
The river is wide and muddy. Its brown waters swirl and eddy. I can feel the water brushing past me, cooling my… Skin?
My god. I am unbound by the mere laws of the world. A unique beast to stand above all others. Why would I need skin like some peasant fish? I am a higher being, always have been.
I will be on my way now. I demand that the waters make way for my presence.
I cut through the water, swimming upstream.
Now, to find suitable food that fits my refined palate. Although I have never eaten anything, I am sure that I was born with refined tastes.
My whiskers taste something delicious above me.
What is that? Did my whiskers lie? That is obviously an insect on top of the water. Yet my whiskers tell me it is delicious.
Do I trust my eyes or my whiskers? Hard decisions. Pah, how could MY senses be wrong? I will eat it!
I rise to the surface and quickly suck the insect into my mouth.
Hmmm. It is not bad. Bah, what am I saying! It is an insect, the food of lowly birds! I spit on the birds, puh! No. I will search further for more worthy prey. I deserve only the best!
While I swim, I can feel the insect inside of me. I can feel the minuscule amount of Qi inside of it being dragged out and being absorbed by my body.
Soon the last strand of Qi is sucked out of the insect and my body moves to rid the insect out of my body by pushing it through the side of my body.
?
Do I not poop? The insect looks the same as it did before, albeit dyed black. And it just got pushed out of a random spot of my body?
HAHA! Just more proof of my superiority! I don't even poop! I bet that stupid bird can't say the same, the lowly base creature it is. I bet it poops all over! Disgusting!
I swim up the river, basking in my superiority, continuing to look for more prey.
Ugh. I've been swimming forever. When am I going to find some worthy food? Oh!?
Out of the corner of my eye, I see a flash of green. I swim closer only to discover a school of small fish struggling to walk with their fins along the bottom of the river floor.
What are with these fish? My whiskers don’t taste anything. Odd, very odd. Also, what kind of fish walks along the bottom of a river floor?
I swim above this school of fish, consisting of around forty morsels, observing them for a while.
Ok. Time to chow! These small fish are definitely up to my standards. Their scales are a real nice deep green. Now that I think about it, they look like jade sculptures.
I swim along the bottom and swallow one of the jade fish.
Oh, fuck!
My weight immediately increases when I swallow the fish and I face plant into the muddy river bottom.
Shit! Those fish are heavy! No wonder they walk along the bottom. Am I going to be able to catch the rest? Let’s try moving.
I bring my fins below me and try to shuffle myself forwards.
It works!
I shuffle along the bottom, catching up to the rest of the fish. I swallow another one, then one more, my weight increasing each time. When I go to move after eating five of them, my fins give out below me, simply bending without pushing myself forwards.
Damn! How dare these fish run away from me! Cowards! Come back here! You have the glory of being my food, yet you persist in running away.
I try to get my tail underneath myself to push myself forwards, but my body is just too squishy to move when I weigh this much.
I never thought I would curse my own body, but Damn is it squishy! When will those fish finish “digesting”? The other fish are getting away! I don’t know when I will be able to see fish like these again, so I must eat all of them!
What to do? Hmm. That could work, let's try first.
Inside of my body, I sense the five jade fish floating there, surrounded by my viscous black body. I begin to imagine my Qi needling the fish, in an effort to speed up the “digestion”. It kind of works. The Qi somehow bounces off of the scales of the fish but is able to penetrate to eyes. I concentrate the Qi needles to focus on the eyes. Soon the Qi flowing out of the fish increases greatly.
These scales. I wish I had scales like those. Hold on, why can't I have scales like these?
I control the needles of Qi to ravage the inside of the fish to steal this fish's scales. Soon the mangled flesh and skin of all five fish are expelled, while jade-colored scales begin to appear on my black body. I concentrate the majority of the scales underneath me so that I can be able to move with the stiffness the scales provide. When I am finished, I have a thick line of jade scales decorating my body. I also feel as if I am gaining something else from this meal than just scales.
A bloodline! This must be some kind of jade bloodline! Although it is not complete… yet. Hehehe. Yes. I will consume those pathetic small jade fish, and they will contribute to my glory!
My body quickly shuffles along the river bed, no long as squishy as before. I gobble up the fish one after the other until finally the last one is eaten.
Yes! I have acquired the bloodline. Now what will I look like when that jade bloodline combines with my, I'm assuming ink bloodline?
I await the change, but nothing seems to happen. I am now completely covered in the heavy jade-like scales, but they remain green.
Hmm. Oh!
Nothing about my actual body changed, but my new scales had. One side of the scale is the same color as they were before, while the other is a glossy black, just like my ink-like body. The green side was hard, while the black side felt squishy, just like my body.
So I can flip the scales to change color if I need to. But, I think I will leave the green side facing out.
Now, who could defeat me!? HAHAHA! Good luck getting through my majestic defense now, peasants!
This is the power of progress. I will not stop till I am the greatest of the greats!