Russell’s life was a monotonous cycle of routine. Each morning, he would wake up at the same time, eat the same dull breakfast, catch the same train with the same familiar faces, work overtime in the same job, only to repeat it all the next day. However, this particular morning was unlike any other for Russell. As he went through his usual morning routine, feeling like a zombie, something strange and unexpected occurred at his workplace.
Jolanda, the reputed right-hand woman of the boss, abruptly informed Russell that he was needed in the boss's office immediately. This unexpected request disrupted Russell's routine, as he had never been summoned to the office in all his years of working there. He reluctantly stood up from his desk, conscious of his co-workers' curious stares that felt like pinpricks on his back, and began making his way towards the boss's office.
Russell couldn’t help but think that his boss was a peculiar character, reminiscent of David Brent from The Office. “Ah, Russell, come on in, take a seat,” his boss said as he pulled out a file from his desk and cleared his throat. “Listen, buddy, we’re going to have to downsize. With the rise of AI, your role has become redundant, and we’re letting you go. It was fun while it lasted, though, right?”
Russell felt like he had just been hit by a truck, pushed in front of a train, and then stabbed by a robber. To make matters worse, his boss continued, “It’s nothing personal, you know. I’ll be the biggest victim here. I’ll miss our little get-togethers.” Russell remembered these so-called “get-togethers,” but without saying a word, he stood up and walked back to his desk, feeling a mix of shock and disappointment.
As Russell arrived at his desk, he noticed that everything had already been packed up and neatly stacked in a box. He remained silent as he picked it up. "Oh come on, Russell, we had some laughs, right?" It was his boss, who had apparently followed him to his desk and was now speaking loudly enough for the whole office to hear. "Don't do this, Russell. You'll get a nice severance package, and hey, let me help you out. You can even put me down as a reference when you're applying for a new job. I'll put in a good word for you."
That was the last straw for Russell. As if the day hadn't been terrible enough, his boss had to go and make it worse. For what felt like the first time in ages, Russell spoke up. "You know what, dipshit? Why don't you take your referral and stick it somewhere the sun don't shine? You might actually get more fucking done that way than you normally would." It was completely out of character for Russell, but it felt strangely satisfying to say it, no matter how mean. That's what his boss had made him think, and Russell didn't really care.
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Then, Russell did something that would quite literally change his life forever. He walked up to his boss, pulled back his arm, and balled his hand into a fist. He then proceeded to throw a punch that could go down in history as the weakest punch ever thrown. Despite its lack of impact, it was enough to anger his boss, who was now preparing to retaliate. The whole sequence of events felt like it was happening in slow motion for Russell. A whirlwind of thoughts raced through his mind, none of them related to being punched. Did he have enough money saved up to afford rent for a while? Would he have to ration his food? How could he buy lower-quality food for his beloved pet fish, Codzilla? All of these concerns flashed through his mind in the brief moments before his boss’s fist connected with his chin, and then everything went dark.
CONGRATULATIONS, YOU ARE DEAD
As I sat in the dark room, illuminated only by the bluish hue emitted by the mysterious sentence, I couldn’t help but wonder what the fuck was happening. Just moments ago, I was falling in the office, and now I found myself sitting in this bizarre room. Or at least, I thought it was a room, because aside from those letters, I couldn’t see a single thing. Not even when I looked down at my own body could I see anything.
As I struggled to make sense of the bizarre situation I found myself in, a voice like no other entered my head. It shook me to the core, sending chills down my spine. It was an urge so primal, I didn’t even know I had it – it told me to run, to flee as fast as I could. It overwhelmed my ability to think rationally, and all I could focus on was the need to escape. But try as I might, I realized I couldn’t move. I was frozen in place, paralyzed by an unseen force that held me in its grip.
The voice reverberated through my mind, sending chills down my spine. “Now, now, little one,” it chuckled. “You really want to leave so soon? We haven’t even had our fun together yet. How very, very sad.”
Every utterance that escaped their lips seemed to originate from a distinct individual. Unbeknownst to me, I would soon become all too familiar with these voices as I embarked on a new chapter in my life. Let the fun begin.