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It's okay because it's not human
Chapter 88: Mandragora Feeds on Human Fluids (2)

Chapter 88: Mandragora Feeds on Human Fluids (2)

Chapter 88: Mandragora Feeds on Human Fluids (2)

“Get up, you old hag.”

Thunk!

Just like he did to me, Professor Pandel slammed the thick bundle of documents he was holding straight onto the face of his twin sister.

“Yawn~ Just five more minutes, brother…”

“Five minutes, my ass! I’ll give you fifty seconds to get out.”

“Oh, seriously…”

A half-elf woman slowly sat up, urged by Pandel’s relentless nagging.

She bore a striking resemblance to Professor Pandel, but her appearance was more refined and feminine. Though Pandel himself sometimes exuded a soft elegance, seeing such overt femininity in this woman really brought out the difference.

“Whoa, a beauty…”

“A beauty, my foot. If this counts as a beauty, then every orc in the world must be a supermodel.”

“That’s a speciesist remark, Professor Pandel.”

“Tch.”

Professor Pandel, being of a certain age, often made offhanded remarks that bordered on racial discrimination. Of course, he would get quiet scoldings from senior knights when it happened, but at over 100 years old, it seemed difficult for him to change his ways.

‘Then that makes her a 110-year-old granny too…’

The woman, leaning lazily against the wall with a drowsy look, indeed resembled Pandel. However, she was about a head shorter than him.

With her elven, slender build, the feminine curves typically associated with maternity weren’t prominent, making her appear almost flat. But somehow, that suited her image.

Moreover, while Pandel smelled faintly of old straw, she gave off a subtle scent like flowers blooming in a meadow, mixed with the refreshing fragrance of grass…

“If you’re going to keep staring, why don’t you take her to your room? I won’t hold you accountable no matter what you do.”

“Excuse me? No, that’s a bit…”

“Right? A 110-year-old hag doesn’t appeal to you, does she? She’s more than five times your age.”

That wasn’t what I meant, but Pandel clearly had strong feelings against his sister.

‘Well, sibling relationships are like that sometimes…’

“Why are you sleeping in my lab?”

“Master asked me… yawn… to help him upgrade his workshop and told me to sleep outside in the meantime. I thought about getting a place, but it was too much trouble, so I decided to crash with my little brother.”

“And you broke all the locks to get in?”

Pandel held up what was left of the locks that had sealed his lab. The connection points were melted cleanly, as if dissolved, leaving them completely nonfunctional.

“Useless old hag…”

‘But since they’re twins, if she’s an old hag, then Pandel’s an old geezer too…’

“And why are you here again? Did you mess up something else?”

“It’s not that. I’m farming right now, and I have a question related to it.”

“What is it?”

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“How should I raise Mandragoras? I need to know how much blood they require.”

“How the hell would I know? That’s something you learn in alchemy.”

Already irritable, Pandel vented his frustration as he shook his twin sister awake again, pulling her away from his bed.

“Ask this old hag!”

“Mmm… hmm…”

Still half-asleep, the half-elf sister was shoved in my direction. Meanwhile, Pandel started cleaning up his lab, leaving me to deal with the wobbling half-elf. I carried her to a cot in the infirmary and laid her down.

“No… I’m not ready yet…”

‘What kind of dream is she having?’

“I can’t eat anymore…”

It didn’t seem like an important dream, so I clapped my hands sharply near her sensitive elven ears.

Clap!

“Kyaaaaah!!”

With a shriek that sounded almost inhuman, Pandel’s sister bolted upright and groggily turned to face me.

“Who are you?”

“I’m Ban, a trainee knight of the Arcane Knight Order.”

“The Arcane Knight Order? Why is the order here… Is Master being arrested again?”

“No… This is the Arcane Knight Order.”

She glanced around the room, rubbed her eyes, and finally seemed to gather her thoughts.

“Oh, right. This is Pandel’s lab.”

“Yes.”

Usually, when humans slept so deeply, they would wake up with drool stains or crusty eyes. But elves, with their lower levels of bodily secretions, didn’t show any of these signs. Even after sleeping, they retained a clean and composed appearance.

Of course, it wasn’t completely absent—there was a droplet of drool trickling down the corner of her mouth.

Swish, swish.

She wiped her mouth with her sleeve, finally seeming fully awake. Her bright green eyes sparkled as she looked me over.

“So, you’re one of Pandel’s students? Oh, how adorable.”

Pat, pat.

The half-elf woman, shorter than me, began patting my head. Considering her age, this behavior was understandable, but outwardly, it felt oddly mismatched.

“Did you come here because you’re hurt?”

“No, I had some questions. Professor Pandel told me he was busy and said I should ask his sister instead.”

“Did he? Well, try to understand. My brother has a bit of a… difficult personality.”

“Oh, I know. He’s always hitting me on the head with paperwork.”

“Really? Even little kids like you? Honestly, he’s a disgrace, both as an elf and as a human.”

“I can hear you, you know! If you’re going to gossip, do it quietly or get out of my space!”

At Pandel’s shouting, she and I had to step aside once more.

“My name’s Delphine. And you’re Ban, right?”

“Yes.”

“What’s your question? Pandel may be a jerk, but he’s thorough in his work. If he directed you to me, it must be something related to alchemy.”

As expected, despite their bickering, the twins seemed to have an unspoken understanding of each other.

“Would you like to come along and take a look?”

“Sure. Might as well, since I’ve already been kicked out.”

With Delphine, I returned to the training field where my peers were busy farming. All eyes immediately turned toward her.

“Who’s that?”

“She looks like Professor Pandel…”

“Wait, could it be? Is Professor Pandel… a woman?”

Apparently, their thoughts weren’t much different from mine.

Delphine, noticing the murmurs, began walking around, warmly complimenting each trainee. Being a female half-elf, her presence caused an immediate frenzy. The men threw down their tools and, like children, started vying for her attention.

“Big sis!”

“Praise me too, big sis!”

“Oh my, but I’m probably more like a grandma to you all, no?”

“Grandma, take me now!!”

‘What a bunch of lunatics…’

I knew they’d been deprived of female company while stuck here, but these guys regularly took leave and went out to the capital. Yet, every time a woman showed up, they acted like they’d never seen one before. Was there some sort of curse on this place?

“Shoo, shoo! Get lost, you idiots!”

Kicking and shoving my fellow trainees aside, I escorted Delphine to our dorm’s designated farming area. There, I showed her the plot prepared for planting Mandragora seeds.

“What’s this space for?”

“We’re planning to grow Mandragoras here. I wanted advice from an expert in alchemy on how to raise them.”

“This isn’t the right spot. Mandragoras only sprout in damp, shaded areas where sunlight doesn’t reach. No matter how much water you provide, they won’t sprout here because it’s too sunny.”

Bringing in an expert had been the right move.

Immediately, Dane and Levin started digging up the seeds to recover them. Thanks to Delphine’s input, we avoided wasting our efforts on the wrong method.

“Growing Mandragoras is tough. Do you think you can manage? If you succeed, you’ll make a lot of money, but it’s not easy for amateurs.”

“Is it really that hard? I heard they grow fine even with minimal care…”

In response to Levin’s question, Delphine tilted her head thoughtfully and answered.

“It’s both hard and easy. If the conditions are right, Mandragoras have such strong vitality that they’ll survive even if you try to kill them. But without the right conditions, they won’t sprout at all. This spot isn’t suitable—you need somewhere gloomy and damp.”

A specific location came to mind.

It was the area near the hole that led to the female knights’ training ground. The place reeked, was shaded by a massive wall, and was surrounded by moss.

“This spot looks perfect.”

We immediately set to work, with Dane using a plow to prepare the ground. After some effort, we created a suitable plot for the Mandragoras.

“Huff… huff…”

“Having an ox makes farming a lot easier.”

Though meant as praise, Dane bristled and threw down the yoke.

“Do I look like an ox to you? I’m done! Next time, you do it yourselves!”

“Aww, are you upset, little guy?”

“No, I’m not mad… hehe…”

Despite his earlier outburst, Dane immediately started grinning like a fool when Delphine comforted him. Though we no longer needed him to plow, his mood swing was amusing.

Using our tools, we planted the Mandragora seeds and covered them with soil.

“With this spot, the seeds should sprout in a few days. Once they’re growing, Mandragoras mature in about a month if they’re fed properly. But do you think you’ll be able to provide what they need?”

“How much do they require?”

“They need blood. Not a lot, but at least every two days, you’ll need to give them some kind of fluid to grow.”

Hmm… Feeding them every two days meant around 15 feedings in total. With 11 seeds planted…

“If it’s not much blood, why not just use our own?”

“Mandragoras fed on human blood are of the highest grade.”

At that moment, we all exchanged glances.

‘As long as it’s not me, you guys can be the sacrifice.’

I noticed Levin’s hand inching toward his mana saber, and instinctively, my own hand moved to grip mine. Even Jake reached for the pistol at his waist, clearly ready to spill blood.

“Alright, how about this? Instead of sacrificing one person, we split the burden equally—each of us contributes a quarter.”

“A quarter?”

Levin drew a dagger, closed his eyes, and made a small cut on his arm.

Drip, drip.

The bleeding wasn’t severe, but a few drops fell onto the soil where a Mandragora seed was planted. Afterward, Levin bandaged his arm and spoke.

“Every four days, one person provides blood.”

“Think that’ll work?”

“Do you think anyone’s going to die from this?”

I couldn’t help but admire Levin’s crude yet practical solution.

“Wow, you guys are real idiots.”

Despite my sarcasm, there weren’t many better options. We were about to proceed with this plan when Delphine’s earlier words came to mind.

“Delphine, does it have to be blood?”

“Not necessarily. Mandragoras need a living creature’s bodily fluids. The lower the life form, the less effective it is, but human blood is ideal.”

Her explanation caused a renewed determination among the group. They seemed ready to bleed themselves dry for the best results. However, I had a different idea.

“If bodily fluids work… does that include semen?”

Delphine froze on the spot.