Ceaseless living or endless death? To what realm does this dilemma fall and under which of such harsh classification, this pitiable existance or is it merely persepective that controls it all. Could this place be what everyone hopes for in the end, at their end, nirvana with a twist, heaven with a price. Valentines mind turned these thoughts over and over in his head as he lumbered through the shanty tent these strangers called home held up in the center by a large iron pillar peppered and hollowed by rust. The angled light of the setting sun shot through the openings in the tent and holes in the canopy casting a spotted shadow across the dirt floor and halfway up the tattered fabric making up the back half of the tent. To his right and to his left were partitions that were likely each of their rooms all of which centered around the sort of foyer in which he now stood. Which was nothing more than just discarded and broken chairs, a petrified log and a steel drum fire that none can remember starting or even feeding but still it burned, like a reminder that you cant escape even in your dreams. Valentine found his corner and a sheet to raise a wall and call his home this 6 foot by 6 patch of dirt and dust. He laid a blanket down and lay atop it staring at the ceiling and the patch of bright cloudless sky that could be seen through a tear in the canopy, this small hole dragged him back to fall evenings with his father. Camping near the river bed in a lightly dense forest just outside his hometown, he could hear the clanking of his father hammering down their tent posts the scent of burning wood from their fire and the itching thought in the back of his head, that same distant feeling he would grow ever more familiar with each year. His father brought him there not to bond but to make a man out of him, he was too soft, too weak. His father made it a mission to make that end with whatever force needed, cruelty for savings sake served with malicious good intent. A harsh cough snapped him back to reality and a silhouette could be seen through the tarp wall at his feet, the stranger settled on the floor and he could see him diggin through a napsack by his side.
"Aint nothing here easy, dont even make sense most times but theres some things we picked up here and there." as samuel said this he found and retrieved from his bag a small metal tin, opened it and put a pinch in his mouth, the smell of his tobacco intense and overpowering.
" See this here is the funniest thing, i aint ever asked for it or filled it but i always have the same amount in here, no matter how much i take next time itll be back." Samuel let out a loud sigh as he let his body sink down on to the floor.
" Quarty got it in his mind one day that there had to be an edge to this place and damn it all he was gonna find it, so he went walking off in one direction still muttering his long winded dramatic speech as always. He showed up back in his bed 10 days later, told us the world just sort of dropped off into a pit of black emptiness, said he could see the water from a river pouring down like a waterfall but he never heard no splash, thats where they grabbed him, at that edge. Scenery aint nothing normal but it aint special neither, told us all about it, painted the picture big as life but when he went walking again, his story changed. Suddenly it was all death and despair, took the same path, same time, but it was all different. The fields he swore stretched as long as sight itself werent nothing but dead dirt now, a rocky path and distant mountains that aint ever get closer, got nabbed this time before he made it all the way. He ain't had the heart to go back out again, can't say i blame him much"
Valentine felt the question catch in his throat, fearing the answer but terrified of not having one he choked it out.
"why are we here?"
Samuel spat on the floor, stood, pulled up the blanket serving as their wall and poked his head in until their eyes met. Samuels eyes were red and pained, they looked tired but accepting like a man who's been in a nightmare far too long. He brought his arm up and silently beckoned for Valentine to follow him. He led him outside, the sun had set and the night was slowly creeping over head and all around them.
"Dont worry" Samuel said " The night aint change nothing really, same odds of getting took as if it were day, but at least this way you get a helluva view" He pointed up at the sky as the darkness fell it allowed the lights of the stars to shine through but that wasnt all there was, not here. Brilliant shades of purple and blue swirled in the sky like brush strokes across the charcoal background peppered with soft points of light. Cosmic dust closer than it should be, seen when it shouldnt, creating more and more mystery in this chaotic existance but this was one that could be appreciated as the first and maybe only solace for Valentine. he had no wonderous replenishing possesion, no beautiful story to tell but he had this sky and its undulating grace as the colors swirled past and intertwined with each other like starlings made iridescent.
They both lay in the grassy patch just outside the junkyard they made their home and gazed up at the breathing van gogh painting before them. Valentine turned his head towards samuel, the sight could only distract him so long, he wanted an answer, needed something to hold onto even if it was a lie.
"We all have our comforts here, things we need to hold onto just to get through this" Samuels words broke through the silence before being cut off by a harsh coughing fit booming death through the night. "I like to look at this sky, only beautiful thing here, Quarty comes out here too but i reckon the reason's a bit different" he nodded his head over to the left and Valentine turned his head to see Quarty, too much of Quarty, was out there with him. The old man was laying in the grass ten yards away stark naked, his pale body practically shining in the dim light, laying on a blanket without a single care blissfully sleeping under the night sky." We dont really ask cuz honestly we dont wanna know but thats his thing, bit of a free spirit and all. But that dont answer your question none, we dont know why we are here, way i see it we did something bad enough they couldnt let us rest but we wasnt quite bad enough to send down below. I was a real sum bitch, worked for this company that didnt particularly care for obstacles, people and the lives they build tend to be obstacles for the industrial machine ya know. Say you wanna build an oil rig out on this nice stretch of land but some old man got him and his own out there farming the land, some corn aint changing the world, that rigs the future. Say you dont trust your company men with their ties and petticoats to get them gone but you dont quite wanna get your labor men to do it neither, loose ends and all. You hire me, an enforcer, a strike breaker whatever my job is for the right amount of coin. I come in and ....gently convince them to leave, that dont work i smack 'em around a bit, that still dont work. Hell when you do it long as i did you can tell right away who you can shoot a mean look to get em scurrying off and whos house you need to douse in lamp oil. One town heard of me and what i was aiming to do, so they met me on the road in, caught me sleepin. Ever get woken up by the terrified cry of your horse getting gutted? Kind of shit that sticks with you even in here. They took my gun, my clothes, and they bashed me in the head sent me tumblin down this cliff, thing is fall aint enough to kill a man. No, that comes slower, comes while your foots stuck under a boulder and your slowly fading out from the blood loss and the hunger, it comes while the critters come to gnaw at cha. Awful as i was, it fed my family we aint come from much, i wasnt smart or smooth talkin, but i was tough and could hold my own in a fight, my daddy made sure of that." A short silence dominated the air between the two men, made long by the pain and the sincerity of it in Samuels voice when he finished his story. Lingering. "How'd you die the first time? I know it was a drownin but im sure theres more to that." His coughing returned with a harsh vengeance
This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.
"I fell off of a boat, i must have bashed my head on a rock or something , the storm was crazy, no way of knowing what it was, i don't remember anything after that."
"Gotta be more than that, whatd you do to get in here?" samuel asked with a voice rough from the coughing
"I hurt her , katherine, hurt her pretty badly because i left. No, no its more like i hurt her because i showed up in the first place, she was safe in her world, comfortable before i came in and dragged her out. I propped her up and told her she was strong, I made her move, made her care, knowing I couldn't stay. Now shes just stumbling in the dark cursing me for the life I couldn't help but change and how i cut her down before she could grow."
Samuel clutched his stomach as he twisted and turned to his side, vomiting up dark blood, covering the grass and soaking into the dirt as he continued to cough and convulse. He let out a long and pained groan as he settled back onto the ground and lay next to Valentine who didnt move an inch, wondering if this was just like what he felt before in the hospital room.
"These aint made to last, i reckon these are kinda just meant to hold us off for a time until they decide what to do with us" Samuel choked out in hoarse tone, spittles of blood still shooting out from his mouth as he spoke.
" What?" was all that Valentine could stammer out
"These bodies, you'd best be getting out of here them things can come circling when this happens, been a few turns now for me, thing is only one can get me, if your still here" another short cough and a new spout of blood stopped his speech short "them assholes will get you too I'll be back, we always come back." Samuels voice trailed off in a whisper resounding with a morbid acceptance. The air soaked in silence let not a word nor a thought cut its overbearing presence as a new fear set in Valentines throat, acceptance. It was acceptance that tightened in his chest threatening what life he imagined to have left. Acceptance that dulled his reaction and damned his senses when he heard the trees rustling, not moving a muscle or showing any care. Acceptance that held him still as their harsh presence drew closer, but it was curiousity that made him turn his head to see what would come. Dozens of shaded figures, each slowly marching closer some were twitching, some making calm deliberate steps, some stumbling but all came forth in confidence. They were overtaking quarty, huddling around him in a lumped black mass which shrouded everything and left only his robe on which he once lay in their wake as they trampled over it to continue forth towards Samuel.
Valentine turned back towards him but couldnt find anything to say or give, only resolution, only an idea. "we can't escape" a heavy step thudding behind them. "I cant move" pained moans ringing from times and people long since dead rode through the night air behind them. "And they dont stop" Samuel whispered, and touched Valentines knee to reassure him, to tell him to run. Valentine reached into samuels pocket and grabbed the metal cheering tobacco tin, took off the lid and pressed the sides of the tin together until the rims met and made a sharp edge, he glanced at Samuel who could only glare back in a murky haze. "If this doesnt work im sorry, if it does, tell me its better, that its worth it somehow." A smirk creeped up on his face "guess you cant really do that though, maybe if any of those old stories about spirits are true youll be able to tell Kat I'm sorry, no, tell her something good, that I found the peace life never left me." With that Valentine, with all the strength he could muster drove the jagged tin into Samuels neck and yanked to the side, gouging out a large gash where his artery once was. A loud consuming shriek pierced through the dense air like an arrow, shaking the world around Valentine as he threw his body over his poor friend, his drowning gasps and bloody gurgles playing in his ear as he held himself over Samuel as best he could. They could be heard much clearer now, they were running, their feet pounding against the floor rumbling and shaking the ground as they drew closer. He didnt know when they could reach him, didnt know when he was being pawed at by half dead spectred hands, having his soul torn and rended. but he knew the feeling of Samuels last breath on his neck. He finally knew it, Acceptance