The next day was the 25th of Quinctilis in the calendar of this world. After our breakfast we went to speak with Yustradil. Beldrak judged that by now, we had earned the kobolds' trust, and it was time to ask some of the more sensitive questions.
“I have heard rumours about apples that cure could any illness,” he said carefully after exchanging a few meaningless pleasantries.
“We know about those too,” Yustradil answered. “The damned outcast grows them down in the Grove of Twilight.”
“The Outcast? Who is that?”
“He is the ally of the goblins. He also rules the trees and the shrubs, and he can make them move and fight.”
That sounded ominous. Unfortunately, that was all it knew about the mysterious apples. We posed a few more questions about the corridors and rooms we had not visited yet, but Yustradil was sadly ignorant of the parts of the maze its tribe did not control. I also made a half-hearted attempt to convince it to send some kobold warriors with us, but it refused just like yesterday.
First we elected to scout the northern corridors and rooms, which we bypassed yesterday in favour of foraying into goblin territory. Beldrak suggested that there might be a secret passage here we could use to surprise the goblins again.
But before we pushed into the unexplored area, we made a stop at the enchanted door, which had the inscription “Reprove the dead!”.
“Have you found out how to open the door?” I asked Beldrak maliciously. “Surely if it is a riddle, it cannot be that hard for a man of your capabilities.”
To my surprise, it was Erky Timbers who answered.
“Oh, that's an easy one. You just have to cast Turn Undead on the door.”
What does that even mean?
“Can you do that?” I asked, instead.
He smiled, bowed, and started to chant. The door slowly crept open.
Inside, there were graves carved from stone and a large black altar. On the altar, there was a whistle, a bright burning candle, and a tinted glass with some liquid in it. I curiously walked in to examine these things, but when I reached for the whistle, Beldrak hit my hand away.
“Idiot!” he shouted furiously. “If you take those, the dead will rise from the graves!”
What? They can do that?
“How do you know?”
“That's how tombs like this work,” said Beldrak now a little calmer. “Don't you know anything?”
“And do you think they will be angry with us if we take these things? Maybe they will be grateful to us.” The dead can rise... Does that mean the dead can be brought back to life? Does that mean... that Lucius...
“They are undead,” said Jim incredulously. “They won't be angry or happy or anything like that. Zombies and skeletons don't have emotions. They don't have memories of their past lives. They just follow their orders, and if they don't have any, they try to kill the living. That's what they do.”
Of course. The dead are dead. They can never be brought back to life. I should have known better than to hope otherwise.
“We will come back later,” declared Beldrak. “I don't have a pearl anyway, so I couldn't find out what these things are good for. And before we know precisely how they work, it would be unwise to touch them.”
“The whistle is magical?” asked Jim.
“The whistle, the candle and the bloody potion too. I would have brought a pearl with me, but lately, my finances aren't what they used to be.” He shrugged. “But we already had a nice booty, so I am certain we can buy one in Oakhurst.”
My head was whirring again. How do you know they are magical? and What use would a pearl be to us? fought inside me. But slowly, my mind gave up on answering these questions, and I just surrendered to the inevitable non-explanation: Well, he is a wizard after all.
Pushing forward, we chanced upon a nest of giant rats. It is incredible how fast the human mind can adapt to the changing circumstances. Only a day ago I was scared to death by the monsters. Now I just accepted their presence with some measure of resignation. We killed the beasts, but one of them bit me on my shin before I smashed its head with my shield, and another one wounded Jim on his arms.
“I will have to tear up one of my tunics,” I said in despair. I didn't have anything else to bind my leg with, and it was a particularly nasty and painful wound. It would slow me down for the next couple of days, or even longer. If it won't outright kill me with an infection, that is.
“No need,” answered Erky Timbers cheerfully, then started chanting. To my surprise, my wound started to close. As the ache retired from my leg, my flesh and skin grew back where the rat took a bite out of me.
“The blessing of Adaron,” he winked at me.
“Could you do that again?” I asked, trying to sound neutral.
“Of course. I can do that every day.”
“And I can do that too,” added Jim showing me his healed arm. “Good to have a priest and a paladin around, isn't it?”
Well, that certainly changes things. If they can heal my wounds just like that... What do we need that damned healing apple for?!
“Sure it is,” I said nonchalantly in the manner of Jim. “Let's find a secret passage then.”
We did not find such a thing, but we did find some money and a ring that had “Karakas” inscribed on it. It seemed probable that the companion of the two Hucreles and sir Braford died here, since Erky Timbers did not see him when he was the goblins' prisoner.
“We cannot surprise the goblins from here,” concluded Beldrak. “But it is still good that we came here. I will now conjure a floating disk, so help me put the corpses on it.”
You will do a what?
“What for?” asked Jim.
“For the kobolds obviously.”
“They are eating these things?” I asked in disgust.
“Well, I mean they eat the goblins, so yes, probably.”
“They eat the goblins,” I echoed and decided not to pry into the matter anymore.
The disgusting little beasts were indeed happy to receive the giant rats from Beldrak. The floating disk that Beldrak conjured turned out to be precisely what its name suggested, a large disk that floated after the wizard. It turned out to be a convenient method of transportation: it carried all the bodies we wanted to move.
After that, I took the lead and hurried to the corridor where we fought yesterday. The bell was still silent, but the guards at the first barricade have been replaced. Jim put a spell on me, which he said would help to deflect arrows and blows for a while.
“We came to parley!” I shouted. “Take us to Glen! We need to speak to Glen!”
The two goblins answered by shooting at me. So you still feel strong enough for war, I thought. Let us see if I can persuade you to take my peace offering.
I knew now that even if I took a wound, my companions would be able to heal me. I had also seen Beldrak face off against half a dozen enemies and kill most of them. We had already beaten a decent amount of fear and respect into the goblins. Now it was time to break their fighting spirit entirely.
I rushed at the barricade with a howl, slew one guard, and pursued the other that ran away. Before I killed that too, other goblins appeared, but they fled my wrath also, occasionally shooting back an arrow. I hunted them through rooms and corridors, yelling and howling, killing the ones I caught up with, or leaving them to Jim and Beldrak who followed me closely. I pressed on, not letting the goblins to think, not leaving them time to reorganise. An arrow hit my helmet, knocked me down and stunned me, but at the next moment Jim put its hand on me, took away the pain, and I was up again, screaming for blood.
In the end, we ran out of breath. The goblins were scattered and fleeing. We pushed them out of a half dozen rooms in a mad dash, and killed at least five of them.
“You are insane!” panted Jim.
“I prefer a more methodical approach myself,” mused Beldrak. “But you can't deny this was effective too.”
We were in possession of the food storage of the goblins now, which seemed an opportunity too good to waste. Beldrak called forth his floating disk again. We put on it everything we could, then set the rest of the stockpiles on fire.
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Now that our impetus was gone, the goblins had time to regroup and reorganise, but for some reason they still didn't seize their chance. With a firm and resolute counterattack, they might have cut us off, but instead, they were letting us methodically plunder and destroy their supplies. Then we withdrew to kobold territory still undisturbed.
The kobolds were again pleased with the booty, but they were also disappointed that we still hadn't seen their dragon.
“No rest for the wicked!” announced Jim.
“We should take the other door this time,” I suggested. “If I were the leader of the goblins, I would put at least five archers behind the barricade now, or even more. This other way might be less guarded now.”
“That door is closed,” said Yustradil who was listening in. “It opens onto the corridor which we use for parleying. Glen and her bodyguards stand at their end, we at ours, and we shout to each other. But when we are not in a negotiation, we close our door with a key, and they close theirs.”
“Then we will break it down,” I decided. In the campaign against the Senones and then against the Etruscans under the consul Dolabella, I have already fought in smaller sieges. With my lead, we quickly assembled a battering ram, then went through the door.
For some reason Yustradil failed to mention that there was a trap in the middle of the corridor, so as Jim and I charged at the door on the goblins' side, the floor opened under us, and we both fell into a pit. That was unfortunate and painful but I still wanted to press on in the hope that our surprise hadn't been ruined yet.
In the end, we broke the door and streamed through. To my dismay, the next room was guarded by four goblins who were entirely ready for us. Beldrak put two to sleep, Jim killed another, but the fourth got away. We were close behind it. The chase ended in a giant chamber teeming with goblins. The ones we have seen till now were armed, if poorly, but most of these didn't have any weapons, and they were even smaller than their armed comrades. They also scattered at the first sign of trouble.
Still, seeing that many enemies was a little intimidating, so we pushed forward much more carefully now. Jim was able to open unlocked doors from afar with an incantation, so he did that while Beldrak, Erky and myself were ready to pour fire and javelins through the door if any goblin showed its ugly face.
We were met with some resistance, but it was still unorganised. The goblins died in ones and twos and didn't try to counterattack or outflank us.
“I think we broke their spirit,” I concluded.
“I think so too,” agreed Beldrak. “Which is lucky, because I feel too tired to cast anything but my lesser spells now...”
He trailed off as the next door flew open on Jim's command. There was a broken chain in the middle of the room, rime covered the walls, and the air that streamed out was chilly.
“It's the bloody dragon” whispered the wizard, his face pale. “Let's get out of here.”
But the dragon already saw us, and came forward from a corner. It was as big as Jim, maybe even bigger. It had four legs, a pair of wings, and a long spiky tail. It hissed at us, showing its terrifying set of razor-sharp teeth.
“She asks why we disturb her in her lair, and whether we brought something to eat for her,” said Erky, his voice a little shivering.
“Tell her we came to free her,” I said. Though seeing the monster from this close made me much more sympathetic to Beldrak's idea of slaying it instead of letting it loose.
“To free? To free from what?” the dragon asked in Erky's interpretation. “This is my territory. I am free here.”
“We were contracted to free you from the goblins. We will take you back to the kobolds. To your friend, Meepo.”
“Meepo?!” the dragon was livid with anger. “Meepo put me into a cage! And you want to take me back to him?!”
The disgusting little bastard gets us into trouble even when it's not here.
“You said we should bring you something to eat. Is goblin meat to your taste?”
That successfully diverted the attention of the dumb beast.
“Goblin meat is indeed suitable for me. They neglected their duty to feed me, so it is fitting that I shall feed on them in the end. Bring me their bodies hastily.”
On that cue, we withdrew and closed the door behind us. Beldrak was still pale, and Erky Timbers still shivered.
“That scared me to death,” sighed the wizard.
“A bloody terrifying beast,” I agreed. “Lucky for us that you got rid of Meepo. The blabbering little fool could have gotten us all killed.”
“After you are done with shitting your pants, come this way,” indicated Jim to the next door.
We got ready, and the door flew open. There was a goblin with a bow standing behind it, but the beast died before it could shoot, the “lesser” spells of Beldrak and Erky had done away with him. I walked forward but not carefully enough. As I stepped into a junction, a hiding goblin rushed at me from the side corridor, and stabbed its dagger deep into my arm.
“I can't heal anymore today,” said Jim ruefully after we slew the beast.
“And neither can I,” added Erky. “Maybe we should pull back?”
“Just one more door,” I panted. “We came to negotiate anyway. I can do that with a wounded arm!”
“We killed at least a dozen goblin today,” Jim raised one of his eyebrows. “I somehow doubt they would be in the mood for negotiations after that.”
“It's best to negotiate with an enemy who knows he is about to lose. Just open the door and let's get it over with.”
Jim obeyed, and I realised that I terribly misjudged the situation. I saw five goblins in the room, a small withered one, and four large, bulky beasts in chainmail, armed with swords. They looked as big and strong as a human, and their armament was as good as mine. So these are the hobgoblins Beldrak talked about. In the middle of the room, there was a vast well, pale, thick tendrils and roots emerging from it like so many fat worms. The room was illuminated by a dirty grey light pulsating from the well, or from the tendrils.
“I... I came to negotiate with you, Glen,” even in my ears my words sounded pathetic and unconvincing. The little, withered goblin turned towards me, its old face stretching to a toothless grin. It raised its arm towards me, and then Jim shut the door in a panic, and we were all running backwards.
Later, when we already stopped, I finally asked the question that burnt in my mind. “Why...” I panted. “Why didn't those big ones help the small goblins? Why were they content sitting on their backside while we hunted and killed their ilk?”
“Hobgoblins don't care much about goblins. They can always recruit new ones. I bet that they found it amusing that their smaller cousins were fleeing in terror from us.”
“Charming creatures.”
“We will find a way to kill the smug bastards yet. But only tomorrow.”
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On our way back, we also brought two goblin corpses to the dragon. I wanted to try again reasoning with the beast, and getting it back to the kobolds after it satisfied its hunger. Still, one glimpse at the trembling Erky Timbers, our draconic translator, convinced me that we better leave that to another day as well.
Yustradil was not overjoyed when we explained to it that we had seen the dragon, but it did not want to come with us.
“Are you sure you explained it well to her?” she asked in disbelief. “Surely she must have misunderstood you. We are the ones who saved her from her brother, and have taken care of her ever since. Surely she wants to come back to us.”
“When we mentioned Meepo, she became angry,” I said again. “And she preferred to stay in the lair she carved out for herself in the goblin territory.”
“For one, I am certain you have misunderstood Calcryx. Your draconic is lamentable.” Yustradil shot Erky a scornful glance. “And on the other hand, she is only a wyrmling. She is a dragon, so she will be wise and great in her time, but right now, she still needs our advice and protection. Even if she does not realise that it's for her own good, we will have to bring her back. Let's get moving. You will make sure the goblins can't interfere while we talk to Calcryx.”
“Not so fast,” said Beldrak. “We are tired and hungry. You can surely wait till tomorrow?”
Yustradil spoke to its guards in their own language for a while then looked back at us.
“Be it so. This delay pains us, but it cannot be helped. Go and rest well, early in the morning we free Calcryx.”
We repaired to the room designated to us, then closed the door shut to keep out the damned kobold kids and their thieving hands. Beldrak issued our rations, and we got ready to eat. Then Erky Timbers spoke.
“Yustradil doesn't want to pay you, you know? When you spoke with her, she told her guards that in the night they shall take back Calcryx without your help.”
“A lying, conniving bastard, as befitting a kobold,” said Beldrak with a measure of admiration.
I was kidnapped, dropped into a strange land full of monsters, forced to bear fear, stench, and unreasonably high prices, and now a two-legged talking lizard wants to double-cross me after I fought and bled for it. I think that does it.
“Trueanvil, you were right all along,” I said aloud. “We are going to kill the damned dragon. And while we are at it, we'll dispatch the kobolds as well.”
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First I went to scout the route that started from Yustradil's hall. In a few minutes, I got back panting, and shouting about traps and hobgoblins standing guard. When I was suitably calmed, I went to fetch a goblin prisoner from the kobolds.
“I don't want to run into a trap again. So I will interrogate the bastards one by one,” I said to Yustradil. “This way, they cannot know what the others said. It's important that they can't harmonise their lies.”
The treacherous little arsehole smiled, agreed, and gave two of its guards to help me with the interrogation. I thanked and asked the guards to stay out of our room on account of it already being crowded enough.
“Now, Erky,” I said then jovially. “Tell the wee critter, that it's about to die.”
A quarter-hour later, we left our room. I had a goblin corpse on my shoulder, its dying scream was probably still echoing in the ears of the guards.
“Bastard tried to lie to us,” I explained. “But the body can still be of use. I am taking it out to set up a trap for its comrades.”
The two guards looked at each other, then stared on me suspiciously.
“Why waste good meat?” asked one.
“Oh, it's not gonna go to waste, trust me, my boy,” said Beldrak.
The two kobolds eyes met again in a moment of understanding, then the other said: “Dwarf and human can eat goblin here. No need to go outside.”
Jim sighed.
“We can't roast it in the room where we are going to sleep,” I announced. “Too much smoke.” Then before the two kobolds could explain to me what a grievous culinary mistake I was committing by not consuming the goblin raw, I left. They did not follow me.
When we were far enough, I set the dead goblin on the floor.
“You can open your eyes now. Go and tell your comrades the kobolds are preparing a raid to get their dragon back.”
The beast got up, hissed at us cheerfully, then disappeared into the maze of corridors.
“You got what I asked for?” I turned to Beldrak. He took the bell out of his pocket (Handy things, pockets, much handier then pouches. I wonder why no one at home came up with the idea?), and handed it to me. I put the clapper back, then hang the bell above the door.
“I'll have the first watch,” Jim said.
Now that I hopefully convinced Yustradil that the direct route into goblin territory was being guarded, we slept on the corridor that they were most likely to pass through. This part of my plan worked out splendidly, not an hour went by when we were roused by the bell. We ran ahead and hid.
And then my plan went awry. Only two kobolds were slithering through the night.
I cursed. “That's all? The goblins will cut them to pieces.”
“At least that way we will not have to be involved,” answered Beldrak.
“Fat chance of that,” I bristled. “With our luck, the goblin messenger got itself drunk, and these two will walk away with the dragon. We are following them anyway.”
“I know we will regret this,” sighed Jim.
He turned out to be right. We followed the two kobolds from a distance of fifty feet for a while, then lost sight of them as they entered goblin territory. We listened for the noises accompanying an ambush, but in vain. No shouts, no screams, not even the sound of a door torn open in haste.
Then the two kobolds were suddenly walked out of the darkness. They looked at us with as much surprise as we at them.
“I think,” Beldrak cleared his throat, “that these were only the scouts.”
He was right, of course, and I was a fool.