PROLOGUE:

“What's wrong with me? N-nothing, nothing is wrong with me. I know that if I can catch myself thinking these thoughts and have the clarity to think through it and say how absurd they are then I know for a fact that I’m sane!” How wrong I was.

Flashes of red and blue lights could be seen on the distant horizon and a lone figure walks alone on the side of the road. Dead trees as far as the eye could see and the starry night disturbed and intruded by the emergency lighting along with the quiet night raked by the whispers of police sirens. The figure continues, direction opposite from the disturbances of the night and as time passes the more distance is made. Finally the commotion is too far gone to be perceived in only a matter of minutes of walking. 

The figure is in casual attire for the cold nights, wearing a cyan colored hoodie splattered with blood and cargo pants stained with mud and blood but more mud than blood. As the figure keeps walking he starts to mutter to himself as if he was conversing with himself, which in this case he actually was. 

“I can't believe we did that… It’ll only take a matter of time before were caught and we’re fucked” he speaks to himself. 

“Well they swung first if that makes you feel any better.” he replied to himself back.

“But… It just feels wrong to do all that- those things to them” 

“They swung first. And all you did was simply defend yourself. Nothing wrong with what I see” 

“Yeah sure and we ran away from the scene did we? Was that a part of the self defense we tried to do?” 

“Don’t blame me, you were the one who went overboard and decided to torture them for your own little pent up revenge story”

“Well… they deserved it after how much shit they put us through”

“They definitely did for sure but next time when you kill people in that fashion please do it in a fixed manner instead of going haywire with anger and killing one at a time allowing for the next victim to call 911”

“There won’t be a next time” 

“Right… we're gonna get caught”

“No, not the point”

“Hm? What do you mean ‘not the point’?” 

“There won't be a next time as in we won't be doing that shit again”

“Yeah cuz we’ll be in jail” 

“I…” he finally trails off his own self-talk and stops walking. “What have I done?” He continues once more.

“They definitely know that I did it. They know that I killed them when I just tried to defend myself from them but…” He bites his lip in frustration then begins to walk again but faster. There was no use in thinking what could have been nor any use in reasoning with people who truly believed he was the murderer for what happened back there. 

“I need to keep going forward now, I’m a murderer and I’ve got to live with it now” He reassures himself then pulls out his wallet. 

“Goodbye… Me” He grabs each form of identity on him each feeling like pieces of his soul, the cold feeling of the cards and how smooth they were and the occasional textures that could be felt like they were telling him to feel them once more as if they were begging to be held onto since their meaning was about to be thrown away and forever forgotten. 

With all possible ways to identify him legally in hand he looked at them all at once; too dark to truly read them under the night sky with the dim new moon and the stars providing enough light to admire them but not the world below he finally threw them to the side to be consumed by the darkness and for a split second the shiny wording of the cards shined once more as if it acted as a gravestone marking the death of the lonely figure in the night before disappearing into the darkness to be never found and only to be classified as a faint memory long forgotten by its original owner. The cards shone the name ‘Zare - - - ‘ The last part of the name being scratched out and destroyed for all the cards shone through under the new moon’s weak glow and its distant assistant stars. 

In that moment Zare felt… light as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders and for once he felt as if he had nothing to worry about. He could fall over right now and go to sleep and waking up the next morning would be something he would definitely look forward to; Nothing at all to bind him and bother him or so he thought, people in the law was now a new problem he had to deal with and the evidence he left behind was a dead giveaway that he did all those things; The blood on him, injuries, mud, stress, and aura he gave off screamed murderer in every way at that moment. 

“What the fuck do we do now?” He began talking to himself again.

“Well first we gotta clean ourselves up then most likely get the hell out of here and make new identities if we wanna get jobs and provide for ourselves” He replies back as if he actually was giving advice to another person. 

“Great, from one shitshow to another then” 

“Seems so, but hey it's better than being caught back there”

“Better now but much much worse later” 

“Dumbass, we would be dead later if you were to get caught back there, think they're gonna give you life sentences? With the shit you pulled off its straight to deathrow” 

“Tsk” Clicking his tongue signaling the end of a delusional self-talk. He needs to find somewhere, anywhere to hide and recuperate if he wants to survive in this new life he shoved himself into and to survive he needs a new identity and walking down the road at night is just the first step. 

Everything seemed rather hopeless when it came to his long walk until he spotted something rather eye-catching in the far distance. It was faint but it was there, it looked like a faint glimmering dot in the distance but the way it wobbled and the way it danced made it all too clear as to whatever it was: Fire, a campfire for what it was. There was a campsite ahead.

“Think they’ll be helpful for us and our current situation?” Speaking to himself again.

“Better than nothing plus I doubt they know anything about what the hell just happened regarding our little incident so receiving help from them is likely” He replies hopefully.

“OK… It won't hurt to try then, let's go” Walking towards the faint light Zare trudges forward and the closer he gets the faster his heart beats. What will they think of him? Will they attack him thinking he was a crackhead? What if whoever this person was they were keeping up with the news and they recently received one about what just happened? In a quick manner, he took off his blood spattered hoodie and wipes off the blood from his hands and some off his face then tosses it aside to avoid any unneeded  suspicion, the pants he can get away with since it looks to be muddy and dark enough to hide any blood unless thoroughly looked at. 

Zare was close by to the campsite. He had a better view at the camp site and noticed that it seemed to be inhabited by 2 people and by the looks of it they seemed to be a couple too. In a loud whisper Zare called out for anyone and lo and behold nobody replied back so Zare did the most logical thing anyone would do which was to check on the tent and surprisingly nobody was home. At this point his mind was racing, where are they? What if something happened to those two and it somehow ropes him in? What if they plan to come back and they catch him snooping around? Will he get shot? What can he say to them?  

In the middle of his mental whirlwind something shiny on the ground catches his eye, something glinting in the dark and what appears to have a bluish hue like a tiny sized tortoise but with a shiny symbol in the center. Walking closer his eyes widen at the unexpected item on the ground which leaves him in shock. “A keychain with a car key attached to it…!” he speaks to himself in disbelief. What would an entire keychain with the car keys attached be doing down here in the dark? Does this mean something happened to the two campers? Should he take it and find the car to make even more distance? Where’s the car? 

“No use fucking dabbling and worrying right now Zare” this time the voice in his head initiates the conversation but still speaking aloud. 

“But… this is really fucking weird, those two can’t just have-” 

“It doesn’t fucking matter what happened to those two at this point, just take the keys and look for the car and get outta here. We can start over, this is our key to freedom so don’t fuck it up for the both of us” Getting cut off by his own voice in his head using his own mouth was an embarrassing moment for Zare but he understood that this was the best course of action for his case if he wants to claim his freedom. Quickly and efficiently he traced his footsteps and grabbed his bloodstained hoodie and threw it into the crackling waning flame to burn off any last evidence he may have had and rummaged through the tent to find anything that could be of use to him. Minutes pass and Zare now has a new set of outerwear to keep him warmer during the night and most of the things have been thrown into the flame which now grew into a bigger healthier fire. Zare begins clicking the call button on the car key trying to hear if the car does go off in order to find his ticket out of this general area… Nothing. No noise and with that Zare was tempted to drop the thing into the fire until he thought of something- “If they were here to camp out then that must mean that they brought a map with them right? Then that also means that I can find out where they originally departed and their car should be there too!” Quickly, he went back into the tent and searched around the little camp area he was in and luckily enough he did find a map which pointed to exactly where he needed to go to finally find his  ticket to freedom. Setting off, Zare began talking to himself once more. 

“What do you think we should do when we finally get the hell out of here?” 

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“I don’t know… maybe live some self-sufficient life deep in the forest?” 

“We’re gonna need a lot of survival skills then! Plus won’t we get lonely?”

“...” Silence falls on himself. Zare was always truly alone, no matter how many friends he had back home and the friends he made online it still wasn’t enough to appease his desolate loneliness. Once more he was just a lone figure walking alone in the night. 

An hour passes and finally he sees light in the distance which looks to be a store with a rather spacious parking lot with a few cars here and there. The car for Zare was definitely here. It took only a few seconds of clicking to discern exactly where his car was and to his surprise it was a van and a fancy looking one at that, this van had a shiny coating all around and was tan in color with brown stripes and a brand name for itself which read out “Vam”. The Inside of the van however did not look to be as clean as there was trash and other junk inside but it's better than finding a clean van since he can actually at least find some stuff of use instead of finding nothing, so as the new owner of the van he might as well clean the interior up for his own comfort. 

It took about 30 minutes of rummaging and throwing trash out to completely make the van in Zare’s image on the inside, that being the interior was clean as if someone speed cleaned it and during that time Zare unfortunately built up an appetite. Luckily though the rummaging session in the tent and van gave him a total of $400 of cash, “lucky” he thought but now the hard part which was to stroll into the store and buy snacks and such without getting recognized as a wanted man; walking into the store carelessly was a risky move since news definitely has spread about him being involved in a crime especially around this area where he shouldn’t be too far from his house. Zare thought about what he should do if he didn't didn't want to starve to death and a “genius” idea came to mind. Opening the glove box he took 2 things that pertained to his master plan: a common face mask and a pair of sunglasses. He made his way to the store to go buy his snacks for the night. 

“Easy in, easy out don't you think?” another self conversation was brewing.

“Yep, except for the part that I look suspicious as fuck”

“Relax, get what you need and get out. I don't think we're gonna run into any trouble” He was now in front of the store doors and from the looks of it everything was in stock. A good push on the doors and a step inside then the shopping spree begins. 

$200 spent and numerous snacks and different items were acquired. The walk to the van felt victorious for Zare and it felt even better cracking open the energy drink for the night while sitting down in the van looking into the night sky. He thought about what he should do now for his life since a new fresh start dawns on him. Then a self conversation springs in again. 

“Where do you think I should go?”

“I don’t know… maybe a state far from here? Pick a state not that populated though”

“Isn’t a more populated state the better choice though?” 

“No, the cops are more attentive and the more people the higher chances of us being found by the public eye so going for less populated areas would do us better plus we aren’t that fond of people aren’t we?” 

“No… no were not” 

“Then there we are. I was thinking maybe our next stop should be-” Suddenly something catches Zare’s eye which freezes him mid conversation and wash over with fear. His eyes widen, cold sweat forms and almost drops the energy drink he cowers down below the window and tries hiding himself from the view outside.

A state trooper SUV parked next to him. 

Zare hears the car door swing open then quickly slam shut followed by the sound of footsteps which can be heard fading off into the distance towards the store. He wasted no time and instantly started the van and using the built up knowledge he had on driving turned the van in reverse and steadily backed off into the main road and turned towards the freeway, he was close to genuine freedom then switching the van to drive he drove off into the distance into the world of uncertainty. Zare’s driving skills for a beginner wasn’t too bad, he was veering a little bit too much to the right but other than that he kept a steady speed and followed road rules. 

Looking into the clock at the dashboard the time was at “3:46AM”.

“That was too close back there” Yet again another self-talk was happening.

“We should be fine for now, your driving skills don’t look that bad so we should be able to get away with mistakes in areas like this”

“Hey now, I think I drive pretty well for a beginner” 

“You drive well for someone at 3 in the morning after a brutal double kill” 

“Oh be quiet we're fine as we are” Stepping on the gas a little more they gained speed and drove aimlessly with the goal of ending up anywhere at this time in the morning. 

“Hey your ramping up in speed again” 

“Oh shit, my bad” 

“Jeez you people can’t drive for shit sometimes” 

“Oh shut the fu-” Out of nowhere a flash of red and blue could be seen from the rear of the van. It was a different state trooper and from the looks of it Zare might be in trouble for speeding. 

“Shit” he mumbled. 

“Fuck! Why the fuck now? It’s almost 4 in the morning and this motherfucker just has to catch me going a little bit above the speed limit?” 

“Your fault! You should’ve kept a closer eye on your speed!” 

“Fuck…” Zare lets go of the gas and begins to slowly apply pressure on the brakes to slow the van down then in a few seconds he stops onto the side of the road waiting in anticipation to whether or not he’s going to receive a ticket but more importantly if he gets recognized for who he is and is taken in for what he’s done. 

Anxiety. Fear. Stress. Anger. Rage. Regret. 

Those were the emotions swirling within Zare. Mostly angry at himself and angry at whoever pulled him over. The car seemed to be from a state trooper but not from the same one since this one isn’t the SUV from before. Both vehicles came to a complete stop. 

The state trooper walks out of his vehicle and walks towards Zare’s van.

Zare reaches into the plastic bag with the things he bought from the store earlier and pulls out a Swiss knife in case things get messy between them and as a fall back option he opens the glove box which hid a pepper spray. The state trooper was at the window and Zare, being ready, slowly spun the window down. 

Finally the trooper spoke. 

“Hey uhm.. Sorry for bothering you but uh did you know how fast you were going back there?” Asked the trooper.

“S-sorry sir I was in a rush…” Zare replied sheepishly.

“In a rush at this time? You're not sporting anything illegal are you?” 

“N-no sir!”

“Hmmm… I’ll take your word for it. Can I see some ID?” 

“Ah.. uh..” Fuck. Zare thought. He threw all his ID out earlier in his little stroll after the fresh crime scene. 

“I think… Oh shit, I left it at the store down the road that way… Sorry” Zare knew this wasn’t going to get him off the situation but it helps with his image to keep the suspicions off him since this van wasn’t actually his and it buys him time to think. 

“Oh… then please step out of the vehicle sir.” The trooper spoke as if he was asking but was actually giving a command to him instead. 

“I’m just going to conduct a simple search on your vehicle then I’ll escort you to where you lost your ID so we can go look for it then I’ll let you off with a fine” The trooper continued.

This was not good, the last thing Zare needed was anymore contact with them. He needed to find a way to alleviate the escalating situation fast. Stress. Anxiety. Fear. All 3 emotions were in his head and right now all Zare could think about is how he can even explain himself when he gets found out for the things he’s done. His mind was clouded, swirling, and drowning in these thoughts almost as if a storm was in his head. Then out of nowhere a voice from within spoke out. 

“Spray him first then go for the kill.” Zare froze in place and began to think of ways to kill the person before him. His mind was suddenly quiet and everything seemed to slow down. Seconds feel like minutes, minutes into hours and his focus was unmatched like a predator stalking his prey.

“Spray him. Mess his senses up. Go for the kill. Zare. Go.” 

The door opens fast slamming the officer and as he is being pushed back Zare uses the pepper spray onto the officer’s face. As the officer takes a few steps back, Zare launches towards his throat with the swiss knife in hand and drives the knife through his throat then immediately begins twisting and turning the knife. Zare then pulls the knife out then immediately using the pepper spray he sprays the throat of his victim. The officer is on the ground… gurgling, crying, and best of all trying to cling onto life. 

“You useless sack of shit. If you stayed lazy like the insolent fucks you are then you would’ve lived to see another day.” Zare spoke. 

“Argh…. Guughh…” Still struggling the victim tries to reach for his radio on his chest which Zare quickly rips off him all the while spraying pepper spray on his eyes and through his nose and mouth. 

“Useless like the effects you have on the community around you” Zare rambles on. He feels shame coursing through him, like shocks of faint electricity running through his fingertips but at the same time he feels a sense of liberating anger like a raging tide within his body crashing with his mind. Zare could only form a face of disgust followed by a contorted smile of relief knowing that he needn’t worry about getting caught for now. The officer is close to death now but Zare has one last parting gift for him. Opening the pepper spray bottle apart he pours the remaining contents on him towards his open wound on his throat drowning him in burning liquid and his own blood. The victim gurgles in pain and anguish and the last thing he felt was a sense of drowning and burning. 

“How thematic, this death of yours” Zare whispered, then sitting down next to him he watched as the officer died from drowning in his own blood. 

The state trooper was dead. That makes it his 3rd victim. Zare stood up and thought about the whole incident and looked towards the car the officer drove. 

“They got that on camera, most likely through the dashcam. But…” Zare walked towards the car and to his surprise it was an old school car so luckily no dash cam was installed. “I think I pushed my luck for today” He thought. Visually inspecting the vehicle, it seemed as if the model was much older than the van by about 10 years and there wasn’t anything too fancy on the car except for the radio built in and the advanced control panel on the dashboard; Nobody was on the back and he was careful to not touch anything in case he left fingerprints on the car. Zare knew that he needs to hide the body of the trooper if he wants to buy time and distance for himself since whatever he did now narrowed the possible direction as to where he could’ve went and backtracking now would be a horrible idea since another state trooper was already on the store from where he came from. Stealing from the car, Zare took what he could as he was careful not to touch the car anywhere and after a few minutes of nitpicking he could only take the bolt cutters and a pair of handcuffs. 

Finally he was done with looting whatever he could find and get his hands on. Now for the tiring part which was to move the body. The idea that someone is missing rather than being outright dead is better for Zare since it buys him the time he needs to make the distance in order to deem himself “safe” from whatever was going to hunt him down. Looking at the body it was lifeless as usual; The throat was stabbed and twisted open with blood leaking out in all directions, eyes open with dried tears, mouth open flooded with blood, and the nose leaking from the pepper spray earlier. Zare simply stares at the body, his eyes lifeless and his hands having small splatters of blood. He stared for hours. He stared at the body until the sun began to rise and finally he spoke for his 3rd kill. 

“I’m sane… I know what I’m doing and I acknowledge this fact. I’m still in control and for as long as I’m aware of the things I’ve been doing then I know… I know for a fact that I’m not crazy…”

Going back into the van he grabs clothes and rags from the back that he had no use for, this was going to be used to stop the bleeding when he drags him in the van. “You're gonna be heavy.” Zare mutters under his breath. Using the clothes and rags he ties the rags around the neck forming a seal to stop any more leftover bleeding that could happen and since he was dead there was no longer a pulse to keep the bleeding going. Zare wasn’t the strongest person out there so moving a body was a struggle for him but if he wanted to buy himself time he needed to move this body and fast since daybreak was here and during the day people were more active on these ‘middle of nowhere’ roads. 

Picking up the body, he moved towards the back of the van and as he was about to drop the body he glanced back into the sky for what he was going to do was going to drag him deeper into this situation he’s in now. 

“Here's to my inferno.”

Thud. 

END OF PROLOGUE.