I woke up and slowly rose to a sitting position. I routinely rubbed my eyes and went to grooming my unruly hair bangs back to normal. Followed by a yawn, I clumsily reached for my wristwatch for a time check.

"What opportunities will come for me today?" I muttered to myself.

Even with my eyes half-open and adjusting to the light, I managed to check the time. My eyes widened and I was knocked back to reality (of this fantasy world, that is).

I woke up really late. About past noon, to be exact. I spared no delay in wearing my inner clothes and equipment: A white vest, blue-dyed leather layered on top, a pair of thin white gloves that almost reach the length of my elbow, a purple pleated skirt, a belt with belt bag to lock that skirt in place, a white cape equipped with straps and a metallic lock, a pair of white socks, a pair of brown boots that reach below my knee– all worn in that order. Lastly, I could never forget wearing that yellow star-shaped hairpin that I found to go well with my straight pink hair.

With my equipment on and my staff in hand, I hastily went downstairs, hopping and skipping steps to reach the ground floor in record time just to check the things posted on the guild missions board.

This wasn't the normal routine; but when it did happen (I could remember this event happening a couple of times already), it hurt me financially. A solo adventurer's work is never done… and must always be punctual to keep up with life's expenses!

Speaking of such, I didn’t know why I had to rush myself. The place was barren when I got there. The tables, the quest board, the hall itself… empty. Everyone must've been really busy while I was snoozing. Everyone just took off, leaving the main hall of the guild house with a completely empty atmosphere, if I haven't said that part enough.

"Weeeell, look who's up… early."

From a wooden table nearby, there I saw an orange-haired young adult man in loose, veteran warrior clothing, layered with some bizarre plate armor, having a Greatsword that had a scabbard that suggested that it was sheathing an oversized kitchen knife strapped onto his back. He seemed to have noticed me shortly after I went down the stairs. It didn't immediately occur to me that he was there. After taking notice of who it actually was, I came to quickly realize it was Clyde, my friendly neighborhood agitator, who was waving at me with a smug look on his face.

He’s the kind of person that just does nothing but hang out inside the guild quest hall, as far as I was aware of it at least. Like a Non-Playable Character, he kept standing at the same position and time, every time. He also does his best to engage in small talk with me a lot at the moment I walk into his vicinity.

It's just my mind looking at him from a gameplay perspective, as my go-to way to humor myself is by thinking that I'm just in a game. I don't necessarily mean that that's all he is, though. I barely know the guy.

With much discontent, I let out a yawn that I wasn't able to do as my response to his sarcasm and went to sit by his table. I just needed to order some breakfast anyway. (Or an overdue brunch…)

"So umm- ya' got anythin' else 'important' to do today, sunshine?" He asked, teasing me with the question.

I wasn't expecting it, but I just accepted that he'd be doing this. All because I happened to miss all of the posted quests for the day.

It has been the third time I've done this, by the way. Clyde reacted just like this the second time, and that ticked me off soooooo much. He pretty much knew it would annoy me. He earnestly seeks out to draw reactions from me. But even so, I‘ve gotten myself well-managed to resist his teasing better than… the past occurrences. That said, that nickname… that nickname he usually refers to me with. I would've branded him a creep for casually referring to me like that whenever we made small talk or passed by one another, but I guess it’s one of the few annoying things I, at least, got from him as an impression. Nothing I can do about it but be a good person, and stay nice and quiet about it.

"I was just… tired, okay? It's not like I'd go broke right now if I stopped taking quests for one day. Sheesh…"

I tried to sound composed… but after hearing it from my own mouth, I then realized how broke I was with personal income, the sole income on which I rely for my survival. The meal I was planning to order would have potentially been my last…

He laughed, then immediately cleared his face after I gave him a cold stare. He then reverted back to the iconic smile.

I briefly sighed again, gesturing to call the attention of a nearby guild waitress. Even if we were literally the only two adventurers left in that hall, I still felt the need to do so.

Wearing a white blouse-type top (which revealed a bit of her cleavage– very important details, yes) and a dark blue tight skirt, a young, brown-haired waitress lady arrived with a notepad ready for receiving the order.

"Give me two of those [Terranaturkey] cuts and one big mug of wildberry juice. I'm feeling drained today."

The waitress nodded slightly at every dictation while staying quiet for the whole procedure.

"Betta' make that ten, add an extra beer, 'n put everythin' on ma' tab. Thanks~" Clyde butted in and confidently launched a charming wink at the waitress.

With a seemingly forced straight face, she looked away and avoided his gaze.

"Geez… pick up girls when I'm not physically here." I thought to myself while sneaking an eye roll.

The waitress finished writing as soon as Clyde stopped talking. She also nodded at his request, bowed before both of us, and then left to walk back to her station to post the order, all of these without mentioning a single word. It wasn't the most interactive encounter, but it's okay because that happening certainly wasn't the first I've had before. Each of the waitresses here sure does have their own persona, I guess.

I then just laid my head down on the table, with my arms resting below my head while waiting.

"Since ya' basically got nothin' else to do today- maybe, we can finally have somethin’ to chat about?" He picked off the conversation with a smile, looking at me intently.

My face buried into my rested arms, I responded with a muffled exhale after hearing that. It partly was to emphasize the fact that I wasn't consenting to any conversation, as if I had any socializing skill to show for it if I wanted.

"Just- s-stuff… maybe a wee bit 'f ya', erhm- maybe a wee bit 'f me; I… don't really know… just anythin' ya' won't ignore me fur once this time!" He remarked and seemed to pick up on my disinterest.

"I… just stayed to eat," I replied, moving my head a bit to look over to the counter if my order was ready.

"A-ahh… I see." He lowered down his voice in reply.

By delayed reaction, his words reached me and put me in thought which went like:

"Was I… ignoring him? For all I thought, simple greetings and even my overreaction to some stuff he said and did were enough to give him that kind of attention. Then again… he oddly didn't treat me as a stranger and was always eager to open up conversation… maybe he just really wants to make friends… Maybe…"

Struck by sudden, invisible guilt, I then decided to suck up my fears and loosened my screws a bit. Well, at least, just for today, now that I wasn't busy at all. Nothing more than that reason to explain it. Just while the opportunity is there, I guess it's time for me to learn more about this 'Kitchen knife-wielding dude'.

"On second thought… why not?" I replied after raising my head upright, with my gaze at eye level again.

I could at least show I wasn't disinterested with his effort there.

"Seems like I finally got ya' interested, eh?"

While he seemed excited with the thought, I still looked at him as emotionless as from earlier. That didn't seem to stop him in his tracks, though, as he was consistently chipper with his mood.

"W-well, ask away!" He continued in glee.

I sat up straight, cleared my throat, and breathed in. After letting out an exhale, I then asked:

"Who are you, really? Where were you born? What makes you- YOU?"

I took no time to think before asking as if I knew what I was going to ask him about those things a long time ago.

He seemed to have responded with a gulp of surprise at my stream of questions. I guess I couldn't judge him with that… even I was surprised I had questions for him to that extent at… such short notice. It did make it seem like I prepared just for this moment, though I really didn't.

"Now that I think about it… was I conducting a job interview for him or something?? I should've given more thought to these! Wait… why should I care?!" I grumbled to myself in thought.

Then again… I haven't given him a chance for prolonged conversation at all, till now.

"I'm Clyde Ironmire. I came from a really nice and neat-looking village from ova' the further Eastern borders of Asparthens. I reckon ye’ wouldn't wanna care fur its name so uhhh-- let's see… what makes me, me huh…?"

He scratched his head for a brief moment, then came up with an unsure answer. I don't really see the appeal of head-scratching as a brain refresher at all. Just saying.

Reading on Amazon or a pirate site? This novel is from Royal Road. Support the author by reading it there.

"Ah! I got it! I'm me, 'cause I'm the kinda guy that always looks fur somethin' new. It's really hard fur me to stay in just one position 'n in any given situation. I'm always itchin' to get out an' stand out, as much as I can. I mean, life is short right? Gotta' live it."

He sighed heavily after finishing all that he wanted to say. It's almost as if he hasn't used his mind for anything worthwhile for a long time already.

"I have to say– judging from what you've just said, you must've lived a pretty interesting life yourself," I replied, earnestly crossing my leg on top of the other.

I hoped he didn't notice how I tried hard to inject myself into it for seamless, casual response. That aside, I guess that's enough to get me invested in talking.

"Well… it's nothin’ to brag about, but- aye… I technically had lived an interestin’ life…" He suddenly replied grimly.

Wait… technically? Why technically? I suddenly felt uncomfortable with where the conversation potentially was headed. All I intended was learning a bit about this guy I kept crossing paths with; but at that point, I might've triggered a bad flag. Not realizing that soon enough to stop, I still kept the flow of the conversation going.

"T-technically?" I asked straight from that same point I was thinking about, almost raising my voice there.

"It's interestin', alright… and it isn't even the good kind. Ya’ wanna' know why?-"

"I--"

"Of course ya' do!" He slightly raised his voice and went ahead before I could've even responded with much reluctance.

His voice was shaky.

"I've had a really awesome team once! Probably the best at that time, and the nicest bunch I knew 'n worked with. But alas, I may've been leechin' too much on their glory… and doin' an actual good job at that- b-but I’m not pushin’ down on myself or anythin' 'n I did nothin' wrong… I was just… just… too weak fur ‘em. That was the real problem there."

He sighed heavily. He hinted a shade of regret with his gesture.

"I was useless compared to 'em, 'n I ma'self knew that all along… yet they still allowed me to tag along. One of 'em encouraged me… inspired me so much! Time 'n time again, they helped me to become stronger. Not to be like 'em, but to be the best version of ma'self… to be strong in my own, real way." He scoffed after mentioning that, before continuing a bit. "That all went smoothly with slight twist 'n turns… 'till-"

He looked down on his side of the table in dismay as he paused again, a little more melodramatically this time.

"You don't have to go so far with explaining much of this. So please… i-it's… alright. If you don't feel comfortable with remembering…" I inserted my words into the scene and slightly raised my hands in my polite attempt to interrupt.

It didn't take long for me to realize that I was too late, after hearing him continue further.

"They all died… from somethin' we all neva' expected durin' one advanced quest we had taken… and I didn't even do anythin' to turn it all around. I… couldn't!" He said in frustration and started forming clenched fists on the table, shaking both of them in anger.

He didn't show his face, but he looked as if he was looking directly at the people he was mentioning with a scornful mental image.

"I'm… r-really sorry to hear that…" I responded with a sudden sad intention.

I was rendered speechless with his tragic sharing, especially coming from him, as I've always seen him as the 'always happy and doesn't give a care in the world' kind of guy. Adding to that was the way the conversation went downhill in a heartbeat. I wasn't prepared to feel this way too… but it's too late to stay ignorant of his pain.

"I was too weak! I was too laid-back! Yet I’m the one who gets to live to tell the tale!? They were all such hardworking people and had real goals to reach… unlike me! I'm so dumb 'n worthless I couldn't protect the people I care about!!"

He raised his voice in his own self-pity. It stood out in the empty dining halls, yet… no one dared to mind his outburst of anguish. He looked so ready to burst into tears of anger with himself.

I've heard enough. I was able to understand a little… at least a little. With the way he was pointing it out, with that little, I felt his pain. It’s nothing I personally find relatable, nothing too noble. Nothing I can safely assume to understand clearly. But right at that very moment, he needed comfort.

I went over to his side, stood right beside him, and peeked a little on what was happening while he was facing down in grief… his face looked mentally scornful. I hurriedly brought out a small, clean white cloth from my bag. I reached out to his tear-drenched cheek with it. He immediately put up a blank expression on his face and even paused his sobbing for a bit.

"Hey. It's… none of my business, I know. But, you've said too much. You can stop dwelling on the past and think about the stuff you should be doing now. As…"

It took much difficulty to mention the latter, so I awkwardly paused to exhale slowly before I continued. I’ll be having none of my weaknesses take over my words of concern right there.

"… a f-friend… I want you to stop feeling this way. To stop pushing all of whatever happened all on yourself. If… you were allowed to live, then isn’t it a waste… to waste that chance?"

The moment I said this to lecture a man who clearly was older than me, I immediately recalled just how I too am living a life from a second chance. That… I shouldn't be wasting the chance I got to live. His gaze aimed at me and then he nodded. Upon noticing another one, I wiped away an incoming tear.

"I'm really sorry that I made you think about those things again, but I guess it was bound to be known eventually… a-and I know it would be even more out of line for me to say this… okay, let's just agree to the fact you really are 'weak'. But– will you just stay like that, and let your former team's efforts die with them? I don't think so! So… I've decided on something-" I said as I came up with the most out-of-the-blue idea yet.

"What… is it?" He snuffled to hold in his sadness.

"Let's help each other out!" I replied, forcing a sudden cheery tone.

"Are you… recruiting me for a party?" He softly asked in surprise.

I simply nodded and smiled at him expecting that my positivity on the matter would reach him.

"B–but it's not like I'm superior over you or anything! I just… think that it would be nice to be at a party for once. S-someone to treat as an equal… or s-s-something!" I stammered while raising my hands in front of me.

He then unclenched his fists, relaxing them gradually. It seemed like I was starting to get to him and alleviate his trauma.

But then he slowly placed his hand over mine. That same one was cautiously wiping his tears away. I panicked with what he did, blushing with the immediate feelings that accompanied it… I panicked as much as to end up slapping that hand and retracting my hand back to my own person.

Even after my overreaction, my flustered thoughts just suddenly died down after seeing him smile, gradually chuckling even, straying away from his earlier distress as it seemed.

"Sorry… S-sorry." He started laughing with trickling tears in his eyes. "Thanks a lot, Lily. I feel… a whole lot lighter now." He replied while using the same cloth to wipe his own eyes.

He let off a deep sigh, reverting back to a grin right after.

"Ya' kno'what? I should do just that. It made me think too much 'bout things but– aye! Let's do it together! I’ll take you up on that offer, sunshine!"

I was still right beside him. He reached a hand over to firmly pat my head.

"..!!"

I always find it irritating… but oddly satisfying as well. Must it be that I looked pattable with the way I positioned and dressed at that moment? My face was flushed from surprise (mostly, it's from embarrassment) but I did nothing else and stayed still.

I just did what I knew to do when a person is sad. There's no need to be so touchy about it… (>,,, . ,,>)

Apart from that, I realized something… something that was made clear in our interests. In a way, both of us needed each other. He just shared something really heavy with me. He already trusted me even with him knowing very little of me. I guess that would be enough for me to let him get to me.

He let my head go then I returned to my seat shortly with an oddly good mood.

… it’s about me being successful in cheering him up, not the patting!

I just came to notice that the same waitress from earlier was already on standby nearby, possibly even witnessing our little 'tragic anime sob story moment'. Upon realizing that we already noticed her, she cleared her throat and shakily presented our orders.

"Thank you for your… umm- patience… y-your orders are… here. Call on me… if-f-f you need any-anything else, Ms. Lily- oh I mean ma'am! Oh, I mean! U-uhhh…"

She seemed to chew her own words and was visibly trembling while placing down our meals. Her facial expression was still as consistently straight as earlier, but her other actions begged to differ.

Since I was already put into an unexpectedly good mood, I simply smiled at her, moved a bit to the side, and offered a space for her to sit beside me. Doing so seemed to have calmed her down at least (for some reason). I just decided to let her stay. It was too late to be shy about what we just talked about. She probably has heard most of everything about it anyway.

"Please, it's just Lily. Care to join us for a little break? It's not like there's a lot of people to tend to at the moment."

I smiled at her, hoping that wasn't a reason for her to be afraid and dodge the opportunity.

She bowed profusely while uttering a "Th-thank you!" to me. The waitress sure seemed timid and clumsy, but she gave in to the suggestion without any hesitation.

I looked over to Clyde afterward. He looked as if he couldn't believe what I just did. It didn't seem that that was wrong… but it seemed like it made him think about something. I stared at him for a bit. He cleared his face after noticing me and after the waitress lady had already taken her seat, giving way for another continuation to the conversation.

"W-weell anyway! Guess it's yer turn now, Lily."

Clearing his throat, he initiated another one.

"Go ahead.", I replied with one turkey leg in one hand and offered another to our new waitress friend, which we will probably 'interview' eventually. (Again… with my incidentally concerning interviewing tendencies)

"I’ve been meanin' to ask ya…"

He paused and made sure that I was listening. I stuffed some food in my mouth first. After taking a moment to chew and swallow, I looked at him. He continued what he was to say.

"The very first time I saw ya', ye're already wearin' some bizarre clothes I've neva' seen before, while a small crowd came in like a storm and carried ya' up to yer room while ye'r sleepin'. All I thought was ya' seemed to be a pretty big deal ‘round ‘ere. But when the next day came by, it was as if nothing happened. What was up with that?? Any tall tale to tell that'd explain things befur ya' ended up in the guild?" He asked.

He was looking at me like he waited a long time just to know that from me. Not a bad trade for his sharing earlier. With his past shared, I did intend to share my past… even if it meant the very beginning of my stay in this cruel fantasy world.

"Hmmm…" I thought out loud while I took another bite, just to distract myself for a moment.

I could be sharing my life before all 'this', which I still find hard to piece together for some reason, especially to people that aren't from the life I was used to. And believe me when I say it took a REALLY long period of adjusting to this new life, and the funniest part is that I'm still not used to it. So… I just decided to cut that chunk, that clip of my life a.k.a the unnecessary "me being a shut-in" bit, the embarrassing stuff I miraculously still remember.

I would instead start telling the story from another starting point: from when I was an official noob to this game I was forced to play in.