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I'm Just the Librarian
19: Private Conversations - Part 2

19: Private Conversations - Part 2

Thea closed the door to the study behind her. Her mother was standing against one of the bookshelves, a book in her hands, when Thea saw her. Thea recognized the book. It was one that both her parents consulted often, one filled with diagrams and explanations of gears, weights, counter weights, and other mechanisms. Even the corners of the leather cover were rounded and a bit wrinkled, and permanent discoloration where fingers and thumbs pressed against the leather gave it character. There were many such well-loved books here in her family home.

Dalliah Chronwright was a clocksmith in her own right alongside her husband, and in her own niche, she even surpassed him. She’d developed a unique skill at being able to trace a particular vibration quite a distance and isolate it from others, making her one of the most sought-after repair specialists there was, especially for the mechanisms that the empire’s government and nobility employed–the clock tower included. Her deafness did not hinder her in her accomplishments in the least, and some would say she was uniquely skilled in some ways because of her deafness.

Dalliah had a youthful face, and it was clear that Thea’s features favored her mother’s. Her mother’s hair was a darker and richer shade of violet, whereas Thea’s was a muted lavender gray, but their eyes were the same shade of deep amethyst. Although, the light freckles on Thea’s face and her slim frame definitely took after her father. Dalliah, on the other hand, hadn’t passed on any of her soft curves to her daughter, though Thea sometimes wished she had.

Dalliah placed the book down and signed, “Did the boy get to sleep alright?”

Thea smiled and tried to let the tension flow out of her. It is so like her to ask after a child first. She reminded herself that this was her mother, the one who knew her better than most.

“L-U-I-N was sorry to go to bed so early, but he was tired,” Thea signed, spelling Luin’s name since he didn’t have a sign for it yet. “His stamina is not quite what one would expect from a child, but perhaps that will get better with more proper meals.”

“I see.” Her mother seemed lost in thought for a moment before she signed, “Will it not be hard on you to take care of him?” Dalliah’s steady gaze seemed to bore into Thea, searching her daughter’s face for answers to questions beyond just the one she asked.

Thea shifted her weight from foot to foot under the scrutiny. “It has only been one day, and though the thought of taking care of a child seems daunting to me… I mean–what if I mess up?” Her sentences were getting jumbled, so she took a breath and tried focusing on the bookshelves rather than her mother’s knowing gaze. “But he’s been surprisingly easy to take care of so far. But that worries me more, I think. I think he’s been in trouble…or is in trouble. I just hope I can help him feel more at ease.”

Thea chanced a look at her mother’s face, curious to see what kind of expression she would wear after knowing Thea’s thoughts. A soft smile lifted the corners of Dalliah’s mouth.

“What am I to do with you?” she signed, but her smile turned her words into ones of endearment. “You sound like a mother already. Though you are just fulfilling a role of his guardian, you are already looking for ways to help him move forward from whatever haunts his past. I hear you’re wanting to sponsor him to the academy, fearing that a life in a temple orphanage would waste the intelligence he has.”

Thea nodded. Her cheeks warmed under her mother’s praise that she hadn’t expected. “There’s no way I could be his mother, but older sister, maybe. No, nevermind.” She waved a hand dismissively and refocused. “But yes, he’s incredibly bright. I want to give him the freedom to learn as much as he wants and whatever subjects he wants. He will surely be a great academic one day the way he devours books.”

Dalliah laughed. “I should have known it would circle back around to books.” Then, slowly, Dalliah’s smile was replaced with a look of concern. “You shouldn’t take this on by yourself though. I know you’ve always been fiercely independent, and you often forget that there are others with you outside of the pages of books. You’ll allow us to help you be a good guardian to Luin, right?” She signed an L with both hands mixed with the sign for book, giving the boy his own name sign.

Thea was surprised to hear her mother ask such a thing, and then she felt incredibly silly. She prided herself on her work and forging her own path with what she loved doing, but her family was still beside her, and she was lucky to have such a family. Her thoughts briefly turned to what Luin had said about family, how he didn’t even understand what it really meant.

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“I thought you and father would want me to give up trying to be his guardian, that you’d think it was too much for me.” Thea confessed her thoughts that had filled her with anxiety the moment Timetheo had walked into her library.

Her mother raised an eyebrow. “Well, you’re right to think we’d be concerned, but have we ever stopped you from doing something you truly cared about? The most we ask is that you have the determination to give it your best, and to ask us for help when you need it.”

Touched, Thea blinked a few times and smiled. “Then, I will. I’ll ask you and father, and even Darcin if I have to, for help if I need it because I want to help Luin.” She repeated the name sign for Luin’s name, feeling that it somehow solidified his place with her and with her family.

Dalliah took a seat on a long, padded bench, and Thea joined her. “With that settled, are you going to tell me why you avoided looking at the commander all during dinner?”

Thea’s eyes went wide. Why she avoided looking at the commander? The sudden subject shift caught her off guard, so that she could only fidget with her hands, her mouth hanging open.

“Do you still pick out articles in the paper about him? Now that he’s come to life in front of you, you don’t want to talk to him?” Her mother’s smile was both teasing and curious.

Thea could feel warmth creeping up her neck. But just as she was about to form some semblance of a response, her mother’s smile turned to a frown, and she closed her eyes.

“Running…,” she signed absently. Her mother stood and went to the door.

Thea jumped up too, concern flooding through her. Her mother must have sensed someone running in the house with her skill. But no one should be running in the house. Not even Darcin and Tim would dare be so rowdy, especially in the evening; they hadn’t done that since they were much younger–though it was mostly just Tim.

Thea put a hand on her mother’s shoulder to get her attention. When her mother looked her way, Thea signed, “Something wrong? Let’s go, then?”

Dalliah nodded, and the two of them sped through the hallway at a brisk walk. Thea followed her mother’s lead, as she would know where the running had happened, and it wasn’t long before they had ascended the stairs and nearly reached the third floor. Before they had stepped more than a foot into the third-floor hall, Thea heard raised voices.

“It-it’s Thea’s apartment.” It was Timetheo’s voice practically dripping with hesitant worry.

She heard both the commander and her father ask for clarification before some loud noise within the office made them go silent.

In the lull, Thea rushed past her mother and into the doorway of the office. “What’s happened, Tim?” Her question seemed to pull all three men back into focus.

Thea’s heart raced as Tim looked at her and then away, as if he didn’t want to face her at the moment. “Your apartment, Thea. Part of it was destroyed.”

“Destroyed?” Thea could hardly believe what she was hearing. Surely, this was some kind of misunderstanding. But the paleness of Tim’s face quickly brought her out of disbelief.

Timetheo opened his mouth, but then glanced at the commander.

Commander Hollendale stepped forward then. He was only a hand’s breadth from her in the small doorway. His steady gaze seemed to pull the atmosphere from chaos into order. “Tim and I must go investigate what happened. I’ll send word when I have more information, but I believe you should think about staying longer here at the Chronwright estate, Lady Thea. I beg your pardon, Baronet, Lady Chronwright.” He passed by then, heading for the stairs.

“I-I’ll be back as soon as I can.” Timetheo gave Thea a strained smile as he excused himself and followed the commander.

The three of them that were left stood there stunned.

The Baronet recovered first. He gave Thea a smile as he came to place a hand on her shoulder, but his worry showed through anyway. “I think the commander’s advice is sound. Until we know more, I think you should stay here. You were already going to stay the night, so a bit longer won’t hurt anything. If it is an accident, you can return after repairs are completed, but for now, you should probably try to get some rest. We may have news, come morning.”

Thea knew her father was trying to be comforting, but her mind honed in on the phrase, if it is an accident, far too readily. If implied that it could also not be an accident, meaning something was horribly wrong. The knights and the commander were also summoned as well. Alarm bells were going off in the back of her mind, but all she could do was nod.

“Okay. Ah…I think I should get back to Luin. Please let me know as soon as we hear anything.” Once her father agreed, she made her way back to her rooms almost in a daze. She signed good night to her mother and passed by Darcin on the stairs as he was coming to see what all the fuss was about. He asked Thea if she was okay. Thea nodded and kept moving, leaving her oldest brother to get his answers from their parents.

Once back in her rooms, Luin’s calm, sleeping presence on the bed and the quiet, peaceful room of her childhood seemed like such a stark contrast to the chaos of just a moment ago that she had to stifle a nervous laugh.

She sat on the bed gently and glanced at the boy, suddenly glad that they had not been in the apartments tonight. She shuddered to think what might have happened had they been there–accident or no. With nothing but what-ifs filling up her mind, she tried to summon up at least a ghost of sleepiness in hopes that the morning light would come sooner and bring answers with it but had a feeling sleep would be a ways off yet.