(Part 1)
I am called Hank.
As I step onto the street going towards the market I marvel at my surroundings. I admire the realism and accuracy of Royal Road.
To call it a game would be a grave injustice. It would be like calling a nuke a bomb, or calling a hurricane bad weather. Quite the understatement.
It is my goal to master every single craft I can here. I've always believed that knowledge is power.
Notwithstanding the minor detail that I have never played a game in my life, in my mind I do believe this to be the best route to take.
I enter the market and see all kinds of stuff going on. I think I will start off with fishing. I read you can get some extra health by doing that. While I try to get that skill up I might as well get something I can do while I fish. Cooking sounds good. I can cook the fish I catch.
Today is my 14th day in Royal Road. I've done some quests and got about 70 silver, and raised my level to 2. I put my 5 points into Dexterity. I use 50 silver on a fishing rod, 5 silver for bait, and 15 silver for cooking.
I was told by somebody whom I can’t remember that you can get skills by doing something long enough. This is how I plan to get all my crafting professions. I will learn in the world what you need to do and then practice it in Royal Road. This way I don’t have to go through the trouble of proving this and that just so iI can buy the professions.
I’m brilliant!
So I head off to the little pond in the park.
----[2 weeks later]----
“AHHHHHHH!!!”
I must be doing something wrong! I've been here for two weeks and have not got a single skill yet. All I've got are some old leather boots, and you can’t cook leather that well. On top of that I have not got a skill for cooking or fishing. The only thing I've got is a few stat gains in Dexterity.
I am a persistent, dogged, pig headed person. If I have one thing to be proud about myself, it’s that I don’t give up on anything. That has actually gotten me into more trouble than anything else in my life. My father was in ‘Mensa’ and had a way with getting everybody to believe every single thing he said and getting what he wanted, and my step father was the captain of his debate team in college. They are both dead now, but while they were alive I learned that you have to keep at something and approach things at different angles until you finally get what you want, no matter how long it takes.
As I set on the ground fishing and thinking of what I can do learn the professions I want, I hear a couple of girls as they walk by. They are both wearing those hats mages' like to wear, and have a book in their hand.
“Sylvia I’m telling you if you read this book you will learn the spell you want. You don’t have to go out in the field and experiment to find it out. It’s right here!”
“...”
“Say something!”
“I don’t feel like reading.”
“Why did you spend 15 silver for a library card to get that book then?”
“It has pictures. I like books with pictures. I learn better by seeing.”
“...”
“What?”
“Do you know how to read?”
“Of course I do! Pftt! Of all the nerve…”
That’s all I hear as they get too far away for me to listen in on their conversation unobtrusively.
“Of course! I can read! I’ll learn all the professions I want that way!”
I’m brilliant!
----[3 days later]----
After doing some minor quests around town for some money, I head over to the library and get a card, then I build up a stack of books with fishing and cooking as the subject.
After a few(many) hours of reading(dozing off occasionally) I finally get what I’m looking for(kinda).
You have learned Cooking(sealed), and Fishing(sealed)
What is this sealed status? Is it locked?
Sealed: You have learned these professions from reading, until you go to a profession trainer and pay 5 gold to be taught the basics of said profession you will not be able to gain any increase in sealed skills.
…”WTF!”
All my persistence, hard work, effort. For naught!
If I have one major flaw, it is I am too cheap.
Make that two, I’m lazy.
But now I’m going to have to get a job. No way around it. I’m going to have to...work. Ugh.
So here I am in the town I started in for 4 weeks and 3 days and have nothing but a level and some points in dexterity to show for it.
But wait! I just had a brilliant Idea.
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I've been here long enough to be able to leave. Why not just kill some monsters and get money from all the monster parts I sell?
But first I will need some kind of weapon, and I need money for a weapon...meh, I’ll just grab a stick from this tree I’m passing by.
I walk out of the front gates and see a field of rabbits. Nice cute cuddly rabbits I fully intend to kill with my stick. I run up to one stereotypically nibbling on a carrot and swing my stick. I miss! I swing, but I miss again! Ouch he bit me! Wait wait wait wait wait no stop don’t do that it hurts why are you calling more of them over here I’m supposed to be the superior race oh no a horde of angry rabbits ahhhh!!!
[You have died]
(Part 2)
-24 Hours later-
I look at my level 1 avatar in dispair. All that hard word I did to level up is gone. It might as well be my first day with the exception of the few Dexterity points I got from trying to learn fishing and cooking and then failing.
On top of that I still need money to learn said skills which means I need to get a job.
Now what job would get me the most money in the shortest amount of time? Think think think think think.
Ah! I’ll just relieve somebody else of their coinage. That’s it. People do it in markets all the time(I think) how hard can it be to take a small wallet from a big pocket in loose baggy clothing?
I do some more quests to get a bit of money so I can buy some very cheap but also very dark brown colored clothing so as not to stand out. I go to the market and wait around in the shade until a plump pig of a man comes close enough by me. I wait until the perfect second when nobody is looking and slowly slide my hand in his pocket.
Denied: Unable to lift valuables from the body or clothes of others until appropriate skill is acquired or generated. Because you do not have the skill your target has become aware of your actions.
I find myself in a predicament. I have literally been caught with my hand in his pants, just like a kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar.
“Thief! Guards!”
I pull my hand out and turn to run away but the cookie jar lunges after me and falls face flat with my person underneath. Ouch that’s one big heavy cookie jar.
“Okay thief! You’re going to jail. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you. You have the right to an attorney...etc. etc.”
I suddenly feel like I’m on an episode of ‘Cops.’
They drag me to jail and lock me up. I find myself alone. All my brilliant ideas have come to nothing. I walk over to the cot and set down.
‘OOOF!’
Hmm? What is that? Sounds like a person. Oh! The cot is a person!
“How?”
“Huh? How what?”
“How did you see through my disguise?”
“...”
“...”
“What disguise? I thought you were a cot.”
“Exactly! How did you know I wasn’t a cot? I thought my disguise was perfect!”
I sense this isn’t a run of the mill conversation.
I know, I’ll play along, maybe I’ll get one of those secret classes I hear about.
I’m brilliant!
“You caught me. I knew you was there. I would recognise that skill(I think) you are using(probably) from a block away. I myself have been doing some similar things since I’ve been here. It’s just I wanted to see a master in action and I could tell you was a master of disguise.”
“Oh really now? Where did I go wrong? Arg. You must be my superior in this. I thought I was the only person who had this secret class too. Hey, I have an idea, how about we share our knowledge about it?”
Do you wish to convert to this secret secret class? Due to the nature of secret secret classes you cannot know the details of the class until it is obtained.
Eh. Why not? I’m not going to loose anything probably.
“Sounds good to me.”
“Okay, I have in my hand 2 pills, a blue pill and a red pill. Take the red pill, and you will know everything I know. If at any time you wish to forget all my hard earned knowledge, or just decide you don’t need it any more, then take the blue pill.”
I take the red pill.
‘Gulp!’
[You have died]