The thumping of muffled bass in the background. Dim lights glaring down from up above. The small karaoke hallway with the lingering scent of spilt sodas.

Hikaru could make out a frustrated expression on Aya’s face, despite the dim lighting. A strange look in her striking hazel eyes that were peering into Hikaru.

Hikaru’s back was leaning against the wall, pushed in place by Aya’s hands that were on her shoulders.

She didn’t understand what was happening, she was just caught in concern for her friend.

“Well, I like you too, Aya, you’re my best fri—”

Before Hikaru could finish her sentence, she saw Aya’s face move in close, and suddenly, her words were interrupted with the feeling of Aya’s soft lips firmly pressing down on top of hers.

She lost her breath, and a sweet taste filled her mouth.

Suddenly, the karaoke hallway seemed really quiet.

When Hikaru realised what was going on, she quickly shoved Aya backwards, ending the kiss.

“H-Hikaru—”

“Wh-what are you doing?!”

A hot flush went to Hikaru’s cheeks, and she stared with a mixture of anger and embarrassment at Aya, raising a hand to cover her lips that Aya kissed.

“I wanted to tell you how I feel…” Aya said.

“I-I can’t believe…” Hikaru felt dizzy, like the hallway was spinning. “I can’t believe you just did that…”

“Hikaru, I thought you knew all along…” Aya winced, seeing her reaction. “You were the one that wanted to know how I felt about you…”

“Th-that doesn’t mean y-y-you do that!” Hikaru stammered.

“I’m sorry…” Aya winced. “I’m really sorry…”

“Hey—!”

A third voice entered the conversation, and Aya turned to look at the source.

It was Itsuo.

“Is everything okay?” Itsuo walked over, glancing between Aya and Hikaru worriedly. From his reaction, it didn’t seem like he saw anything though. “You guys just ran out of the room...”

“Everything’s okay, Itsuo.” Aya smiled weakly, trying to shoo Itsuo off, but she didn’t have her usual charm.

Noticing this, Itsuo raised an eyebrow, then glanced over to Hikaru, looking down at her depressed face.

Something’s clearly not right here. Itsuo thought. Aya probably did something to Hikaru…

“Hey, Hikaru…” Itsuo said. “You okay…?”

Hikaru didn’t respond.

He reached out to grab Hikaru, planning to take her back in the room and away from Aya, but Aya grabbed onto his wrist, stopping him.

“What are you doing?” Aya asked.

“Huh? I’m just going to take her back in the room. She doesn’t look okay.”

“I’m with her.” Aya protested. “I’m already taking care of her.”

Itsuo didn’t trust Aya at all.

“Yeah, but—”

“Itsuo…” Hikaru spoke, raising her head up with a faint smile. “It’s fine… please let me talk to Aya for a moment… alone…”

Itsuo stared at Hikaru’s face judgingly for a second, before being satisfied that Hikaru was okay to be left alone with Aya.

“If that’s what you want.” Itsuo nodded, then indicated with his head to the karaoke room. “I’ll just be inside if you need anything, let me know.”

Hikaru gave a brief nod back, and Itsuo went back inside the karaoke room, closing the door behind him.

“Hikaru—” Aya started.

“Look, Aya…” Hikaru said, staring her in the eye. “I… I have to be honest…”

“…yes…?”

Aya placed a hand over her racing chest.

Would she like me back…? Aya was thinking. Ahh! I wish I didn’t kiss her so suddenly! But it felt like it was the only way to tell her how I felt…

“I…” Hikaru breathed out, her face still flushed from the kiss. “I don’t know how I feel about… that…” She glanced downwards, biting onto her lower lips. “We’re both girls…”

“Th-that doesn’t matter…!” Aya found herself quickly speaking. “Why does it matter if we’re both girls? Love is just a feeling, isn’t it?”

“Yes…”

“Then, it’s okay! It shouldn’t matter what gender we are, no matter if we’re both guys, or a guy and a girl, or two girls! We can just go to a different country to get married, and I can—”

“M-marriage?!” Hikaru’s face turned an even brighter shade of red.

“I-I mean…” Aya tried to retract her sentence, blushing along with Hikaru. “T-that’s only if you want to,” she said hastily, “but the point, I’m trying to make is that it shouldn’t matter if we’re both girls!”

“Well…” Hikaru glanced sideways. “I don’t know, Aya…”

“H-how do you feel… about me…?” Aya asked.

“…”

Hikaru paused, shuffling uncomfortably with one hand grabbing onto her other arm by the elbow. Her back was still against the wall of the karaoke hallway.

“I… I like you…” Hikaru said.

Aya’s eyes lit up.

“…as a friend…” Hikaru added quietly.

“Ju-just a friend…?” Aya asked, feeling a hole in her stomach.

Hikaru nodded slowly.

“Don’t you have other feelings for me…?” Aya said.

“I…” Hikaru was avoiding Aya’s stare. “I don’t know…”

“B-b-but…”

Aya was so used to rejecting other people’s confession that she had never thought it would be possible that she would be the one to be rejected.

“Can’t we just be friends…?” Hikaru whispered. “You’re my best friend, Aya… I don’t want to ruin that…”

Aya was at a loss of words, her mouth shaking. She swallowed and tried to regain her composure with that elegant smile she had on at school, but she could only manage a miserable twitch of her lips.

“P-please…” Aya said, sincerely. “I really like you, Hikaru… a lot…”

Hikaru shook her head, closing her eyes tightly.

“D-don’t do this, Hikaru…” Aya grabbed onto one of Hikaru’s hands tightly with both hands, trying to show how much she meant to her. “I’m really serious about you…”

“Aya…”

“Give me a chance…” Aya insisted. “I promise I will treat you right…”

“I can’t…” Hikaru tried to pull Aya’s hands off, but she couldn’t. “We’re both girls, Aya…”

“I-I told you that didn’t matter…!”

“It won’t work! I-I can’t date another girl!”

“Please!”

Hikaru yanked her hand hard out of Aya’s grasp.

“I said no, Aya!” Hikaru cried. “You have to stop being so selfish!”

Aya took a step back, astounded. “S-selfish…?!”

“You’re always thinking of yourself! Even when you kissed me just then, and even now!”

“Th-that’s because…”

Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

Hikaru turned away from Aya, running with an expression on her face that said she was trying hard not to cry.

“H-Hikaru…!”

Hikaru turned into the karaoke room where the rest of the group were, then entered, closing the door behind her.

Aya was left alone, standing outside in the dimly lit karaoke hallway.

“…u…ug…”

She leaned against the wall, feeling breathless. There was a strange pain in her chest that she never felt before.

Sinking to her knees, she felt tears welling up in her eyes as a wave of sadness hit her like a punch to the gut.

Aya couldn’t control her breathing, and she felt the tears falling from her eyes uncontrollably. She clutched her shoulders, hugging herself tightly, to try to stop herself from shaking.

~x~

Did I do the right thing…?

Hikaru was sitting back at the karaoke room, surrounded by the jovial cheers of her friends around her as they sang, unaware of what had happened outside.

They had given her some brief questioning, but Hikaru simply said that Aya was feeling unwell and wanted some fresh air.

The only one that doubted her answer was Itsuo.

He moved from across the room to sit next to her, staring down at her troubled face.

“Hikaru…” Itsuo said. “Are you sure that everything was okay between you and Aya?”

Hikaru glanced up at the concerned look on Itsuo’s face and forced a smile.

“Yes, it’s fine, Itsuo… Thanks for asking…” Hikaru said.

He wasn’t convinced though.

“She didn’t… hurt you… or anything, right?” Itsuo said.

Hikaru shook her head, and Itsuo felt relieved.

At least, she isn’t secretly bullying Hikaru, I guess… Itsuo thought. I wonder what they were talking about though… They looked like they were fighting…

Itsuo wanted to press on, but he knew it wasn’t any of his business to keep pursuing the topic if Hikaru didn’t want to talk about it.

“Where’s Aya?” Fumiko asked, walking over to Hikaru from the front of the karaoke room. “Is she still not back yet?”

“Um…” Hikaru glanced at the door. “I don’t know…”

Fumiko sighed, placing a hand to her forehead. “You should had stayed out with her if she said she wasn’t feeling well, Hikaru…”

“Ye-yes…”

“Let’s go out and look for her,” Fumiko said, making a move for the door, but stopped when she felt her phone vibrating in her hand.

Fumiko glanced down at her phone, reading the screen for a moment.

“Ah, it’s Aya…” Fumiko said, pausing. “She texted me saying that she came down with a cold, so she’s heading home first…”

“O-oh, really?” Hikaru said.

“Shame…” Chuuji shook his head. “I didn’t even get to talk to her much...” Then, he paused, before suddenly, holding his head in pain. “Ahh! What if I never get to see her again?! How would I live?!”

“Cut it out,” Hiroto sighed, grabbing a hold of his friend by the shoulder.

“Is Aya okay?” Sana asked Hikaru. “I thought she just wanted some fresh air…”

“Yeah, how did she look anyway?” Fumiko chipped in. “You saw her last, Hikaru.”

Hikaru felt overwhelmed by the stares of the whole room and also being a person that wasn’t good at lying. She shrunk into her chair, trying to come up with something, but her mouth dangled open uselessly.

“Aya was fine.” Itsuo spoke for Hikaru instead. “I saw her outside. There wasn’t anything Hikaru could do.”

Fumiko flashed a doubtful look at Itsuo, then stared back at Hikaru.

“Is that true, Hikaru?” Fumiko asked.

Hikaru shuffled under her gaze, and Itsuo stepped in again.

“I saw it myself,” Itsuo reiterated. “Stop picking on her, okay, Fumiko?”

“Picking on her?” Fumiko said, incredulous. “I’m just worried about Aya!”

“If you’re worried about her, you would stop pestering Hikaru, and just go ask Aya yourself.” Itsuo retorted.

“Ugh…” Fumiko didn’t have much to say after that.

“Co-come on, guys…” Sana waved her hands nervously in front of her. “Let’s just continue the karaoke. I’m sure Aya is fine, if Itsuo and Hikaru already made sure of it before…”

Hiroto nodded, glancing over at Sana. “Sana’s right. There’s no point to continue this bickering.”

“Ooh!” Chuuji jumped up, staring at the karaoke screen. “The song coming up is mine!”

Everyone in the room started going on with the karaoke, trying to erase the tension.

Itsuo glanced over at Hikaru, and saw a faint smile on her face.

“Thanks, Itsuo…” Hikaru said. Her head was slightly down, as though she was hiding, her plain black hair falling to either sides of her face. There was sadness evident in her eyes, but also a strong fighting spirit in those same brown eyes. She wouldn’t allow herself to cry.

Staring into her smile at that moment, Itsuo felt his heart flutter. He had always thought Hikaru was a bit cute, but this was the first time that he thought that she was beautiful.

Turning away, Itsuo concealed his flushed face.

“No problem…” He muttered.

~x~

Entering her clean and tidy apartment, Hikaru mumbled a quiet ‘I’m home’ to her mother, Haruka, before quickly going to her bedroom and closing the door behind her.

Hikaru dropped her bag in the side of the room, then fell down onto her bed, face-first, colliding into the soft cushion.

Her entire body felt weak, and her mind was exhausted.

“…”

She stayed in the same position for a while, before needing to take a breath, and rolled to her side so that she was no longer face-first on the bed.

Hikaru sighed, staring at the empty walls of her bedroom.

“Did I do the right thing…?” She whispered to herself.

In her mind, she didn’t believe that a girl and another girl could realistically be in a romantic relationship together. How would their friends and family see them? How could they live, trying to hide such a thing? Would they even be allowed to get a job? How could they even have children?

It didn’t help that the country they lived in, Japan, was even stricter on these types of things.

But another big part of the reason that she said no to Aya was that she didn’t want to ruin Aya’s future and reputation.

This is for the best, right? Hikaru thought to herself. This way, Aya also won’t get hurt. The whole school would turn against her if they found out she liked another girl… I don’t want her to suffer because of me…

Hikaru raised her phone that was in her hand to eye-level, staring blankly at the screen that was showing a dark reflection of herself. But… do I actually have feelings for Aya…?

…

I mean, she’s my best friend, and I like her a lot… but… I didn’t really think about her that way… Sure, she’s really pretty and beautiful… but…

Hikaru tossed her phone out on the bed, then reached out, grabbing onto her pillow, and pulling it into a tight hug. She felt like screaming inside.

How could I like another girl?! Th-that’s impossible…

I hope Aya can just forget about it, and we can go to just being friends again…

Hikaru raised a finger absent-mindedly to her lips and touched them with her fingertip.

She actually kissed me…

…

That was my first kiss as well…

Ugh…

She flung around on her bed wildly, flustered, then sat upright with her hair in a mess and her cheeks rosy red.

“St-stop thinking about it, Hikaru…” She told herself. “I’m going to go to school tomorrow… and just pretend like everything is normal…”

Satisfied with her decision, she got out of the bed to get ready for sleep.

~x~

The dreaded morning arrived quicker than Hikaru would had liked to hope for, and she dressed herself inattentively, having had a restless sleep where she spent most of the time turning and tossing on her bed.

She didn’t even realise that the door had been knocking for several minutes, until Haruka dashed out of her bedroom, yelling at Hikaru.

“Hikaru! Didn’t you hear the door? Someone’s been knocking for ages!!”

With black circles around her eyes from a late night of what she called ‘light drinking’, Haruka opened the door to see Itsuo standing outside.

“Hello, Haruka!” Itsuo greeted with a smile.

“Oh right, it’s you, Itsuo! Of course!” Haruka yelped, then apologised for her messy appearance, before leading him inside to sit, while he waited for Hikaru.

Haruka disappeared back in her bedroom, and Itsuo was seating on the couch in the living room, glancing down at the time on his phone.

It was quite late, and he had been waiting outside the apartment for a while for Hikaru. At this rate, they would surely be late for school.

It also wasn’t normal for Hikaru to be this late either.

Itsuo glanced around the apartment with worried eyes, just in time to see Hikaru stepping out of her bedroom, dressed in her school uniform.

“Ack!” Hikaru shrieked, seeing him, surprising Itsuo.

Itsuo laughed at her reaction, getting up from the coach. “It’s just me, haha. You okay, Hikaru?”

“R-right…” Hikaru said, laughing weakly with Itsuo. “Sorry, I was just surprised, that’s all…”

Seeing that Hikaru didn’t appear to know how late they were, Itsuo decided not to say anything. He stared at her face, seeing her adorable brown eyes and child-like features. It was the usual subtle charm about Hikaru, that for some reason, suddenly seemed a lot more pronounced to Itsuo now.

Feeling his heart beginning to flutter again, he shook his head furiously then walked with Hikaru out the apartment.

Could I… Could I be falling for Hikaru…? Itsuo thought to himself in shock. It can’t be…

~x~

Arriving at school, Hikaru felt a lot better after having tried to be her usual cheerful self with Itsuo during their walk together. Itsuo was laughing a lot more at her attempts at jokes, which also helped her to regain her spirits.

I can do it! Hikaru was thinking, balling her fists up with a determined expression. I can talk to Aya like normal! I don’t want to lose her as a friend!

Entering through the golden front gates of the prestigious Hibiya High, they were greeted with the usual extravagant court yard of the school. Except this time, there were no students around as there usually would be before morning classes.

“Where’s everyone?” Hikaru blinked.

“Um…” Itsuo coughed. He had been hiding the fact that they were late the entire time, not knowing how to break the news to Hikaru. He knew that she would likely panic and run, which would probably end up in her tripping and hurting herself.

“We’re a bit late…” Itsuo said. “Don’t worry about it, Hikaru.”

“A bit late?” Hikaru repeated. Then, she reached into her bag, taking her phone out to look at the time.

Itsuo winced, seeing this.

“WAAH!!” Hikaru screamed, almost dropping her phone. “We’re almost half an hour late!!”

He sighed, then watched wearily as Hikaru ran off, just like he predicted.

She managed to run for a good five seconds, before she tripped over her own feet, and fell down to the grass.

“H-Hikaru!” Itsuo ran up after her, quickly.

“We have to get to class…” Hikaru breathed, picking herself up and ignoring the scratch on her knee. “I’ve never been this late before…!”

“Here…”

Itsuo grabbed onto Hikaru, pulling her up from the grass. Then, out of nowhere, she was swept off her feet and found herself in Itsuo’s arms.

“Wh-what are you doing?!” Hikaru’s face instantly turned pomegranate red.

“You wanted to get there quicker, right?” Itsuo said, trying to avoid looking down at Hikaru. She was way too close. If he looked down, he knew that his own face would turn red as well. “This way will be the fastest.”

Without waiting for Hikaru to protest, Itsuo ran with Hikaru in his arms across the giant school courtyard, navigating his way to their classroom.

Hikaru was dying of embarrassment inside, her saving grace though, was that somehow Itsuo managed to avoid anyone from seeing them. Or at least to her knowledge.

When they were close to the classroom, Itsuo dropped her back down, and she mumbled a nervous ‘thank you’ to Itsuo before hurriedly skittering into the classroom.

“So-sorry, I’m late!!” Hikaru squeezed her eyes shut and bowed her head.

“Ah, Hikaru…” Mr. Abe’s voice reached her ears, and she slowly raised her head again, opening her eyes at the same rate. “This is unusual for you, to be so late…” He paused, seeing Itsuo enter as well. “And Itsuo.”

“I-I’m really sorry—” Hikaru stammered.

Mr. Abe waved his hands in front of him. “Please, don’t worry about it.” He laughed. “I know you’re a very hard working student, Hikaru. Let’s try not to make this a habit, though.”

Hikaru nodded quickly.

“Right, Itsuo?” Mr. Abe said.

Itsuo shrugged. “It was my fault Hikaru was late anyway, so any punishment should go to me.”

“Then, detention after school should be no problem.” Mr. Abe said, annoyed at Itsuo’s attitude.

Itsuo shrugged again, then casually walked past Hikaru and over to his desk.

Hikaru opened her mouth to protest, but Mr. Abe interrupted her.

“Please, Hikaru. Go to your seat now. The class has been waiting long enough.”

Seeing the eyes of the classroom on her, Hikaru blushed, then bowed to apologise again, before hurrying to her desk.

I have to talk to Aya like normal…!

Hikaru glanced at the desks leading up to Aya’s. She saw Fumiko giving her a playful smile as a greeting, and Hikaru smiled back weakly.

Behind Fumiko should be…

Empty.

There was an empty desk behind Fumiko.

Hikaru stared at the empty desk, as she got into her own desk at the side of it.

“Psst…”

Hikaru heard someone whispering to her, and looked at the desk behind Aya’s, to see Sana.

“Aya’s sick today… she’s not coming to school…” Sana whispered to Hikaru.