No PC. No internet. No electricity. NO INDOOR PLUMBING!!!

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU DAD?!."

I didn't see a fridge, and there weren't any snacks in the cupboards when I was looking for keys to the locked room, so what are we even meant to eat here? Though that's probably why my parents aren't here right now. They'll be off in town buying stuff for our stay.

"Ugh... I'm missing the raid for this!"

Raid? Oh yeah! I remember that I had plans with my friends to do a new raid event in the MMO we play together. It's a limited time thing, just for the first week of summer, but they've had it cover both weekends so adult players still get enough time to play outside of work. Thank you Mr. CEO for approving a 10 day event. Very considerate of you. SMART. Ahem...

We shouldn't be out here more than a couple of days. There's no way my parents could afford a full week in a place this big, let alone both of them getting the time off work for that long at the same time. I'll just have to message the boys and tell them we NEED to delay the raid. They'll understand.

I get up from the ledge at the back of the house where I'd been sprawled out in the sun, take a step towards the stairs, and freeze. I hazily recall trying to find my luggage earlier, so its not up there, and seeing nothing while racing around the rest of house either. I pat my pockets down on my pants and jacket. My phone isn't in any of them. Guess I'll go check my room anyway.

"Phew..."

It was on the floor right up against the wall. Must have fallen asleep with it in my hand or under the pillow or something. Whatever. Let's break the bad news to the crew.

"FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

The screen is cracked. Of course it is. It must have smashed off the bed frame. No. The chair is tipped over. I must have stumbled in, still woozy from the travel meds, tripped over the chair, and smashed my phone on the desk or floor.

"SUNUVABICH!!!"

I press the power button anyway, offering prayers to the gods of technology, and...

"Oh thank fughhh..."

Although the screen is cracked, it hasn't pixelated. It's just about useable, so I flick open messenger and...

No signal.

OF!!!

COURSE!!!

I nearly throw the phone on the floor again, but grit my teeth, grip the phone tight, and let out a long slow breath to calm myself.

Hopefully my little clan will either wait for me, assuming something has happened, or they'll be willing to do the event again when I get back. My parents better bring some good snacks and have more than staying here in mind for the holiday. There's probably something interesting in town worth checking out. They might have an arcade or cafe with signal. Hell, even a convenience store would do. Sit on the curb outside with a soda and chat with everyone online. That'd be a nice afternoon, honestly.

I slip the phone in my pocket and go for a wander round the rest of the house again. Opening all the curtains and windows to air the place out completely. Might as well let the light in and get in my parents' good books for when they return.

Turns out there are a lot of windows. The big end rooms upstairs are like the long lounge downstairs, with semi-panoramic windows letting in light from three sides. The front corner of the big room next to mine creaks really bad. I think the floorboards might actually be loose, maybe. I get an impulse to pull them up, to try and peer into the top of the locked room I realise is below that corner, but stop myself. That would be property damage and we would be charged so much for that. Forget a deposit or whatever you pay for places like this, they might even call the cops on me. We'll just have to call the management company later so they know and we can't be blamed for it. Definitely gonna be on my parents' good side for noticing that one.

Unless it's locked because of the damage and no one can get access during our stay anyway. That makes more sense. Don't want to cause further damage or worry a guest with something like that while they're waiting for repairs. Maybe the damage is why we can afford a stay here? Eh, whatever...

After peeling back the final curtain, sliding open the last window, and letting in all the light and air I can, I toddle back to the lounge. I'm a little miffed that I've already taken to that spot on the back stoop. It really is refreshing letting a warm summer breeze in, breathing in the clean scent of the grass, the slightly heavier smell of the forest beyond. It's all very green and bright. Makes me feel like a hippy, becoming one with nature, or just old, enjoying the simple things. God, that's embarrassing...

Before long I can feel myself starting to doze, but I haven't had anything to drink in however long, so head to the kitchen for a glass of water at least.

A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

No fridge.

"Oh yeah."

I wearily make my way along the stone bench to the sink. My hand hovers over the carved out recess. No tap.

"Ohh... yeahhh..."

I drag myself out round the side of the house to the well.

"I hate you, Dad."

It's not a particularly big well. The hole is only really a foot and a half wide, so no need to worry about dead girls crawling out of it at night. Well, maybe if they're under 10, but I could totally beat up an elementary school ghost. The wooden bucket has a stone weight in the base so that it actually sinks when it reaches the water too. I'd never considered how they might just float if they aren't heavy enough. It makes it a bit of a strain to lower down, rather than just letting it drop and maybe break or wedge itself part way.

"Huff..."

It's REAL heavy when full, though.

I heave the bucket back up. Hand over hand like I'm trying to scale a rope to the ceiling in gym class. The rope on the bucket is pretty similar to be honest. Thick heavy duty stuff. I suppose it has to be, to not rot from the well water and all weather exposure, and still deal with the weight of a full load.

The water that comes up is surprisingly clear. I honestly thought it was going to be gross. Like, covered in pond scum or algae, maybe even have a dead bird or rodent in it. Possibly even run off from the poop pit, but I guess that's why it's on the opposite side of the compound. I mean, a nice place like this probably has a groundskeeper too. Someone that makes sure everything is in tip top shape before and after guests stay. Anyway, I still don't trust the water, what with it being outdoors, so I opt to boil it before drinking.

How do I get it inside though? The rope only stretches so far and is all tied up end to end between the well and the bucket. Kinda has to be that secure, all things considered. "Hmm..."

"Oh!"

I jog round the other side of the house. There's a similar bucket by the bath. Thankfully, it doesn't have a weight in the bottom. I rinse it out with a little water first, then transfer the rest into it for transporting inside. In the kitchen I rummage through the cupboards for a kettle or pot to use. Thankfully there's a nice cast iron one tucked under the stone bench near the sink. I rinse it out too, then pop it over the metal grill in the middle of the bench by the oven.

"Ah crap!"

After running out to the wood shed and back for some logs, and all the other exercise I've been doing, I've worked up a bit of sweat, so take my coat off and leave it on the bench for now. I set the wood in place for a fire under the grill. There's a little shelf for the ash to fall down through, so it's all pretty easy to clean and keep the fire burning. How do I light it though?

I haven't seen any matches and I don't have a lighter on me or anything. I look through the shelves again and find a little tin box. It's got what looks like a rock and a nail file in it, but I remember seeing these on survival shows and in movies. It's a flint and steel. Maybe I should be drinking my own y'know, instead, like that bearguy?!.

"HELL NO!"

Shaking my head furiously, I go about lighting the fire, striking the stone against the metal to get a spark as close to the kindling as possible.

After what feels like an hour I give up.

There wasn't any paper or fire lighters in the kitchen from the last couple of times I looked, and I'm sure there's nothing like that anywhere in the house either. Hell, there's not even toilet roll in the outhouse. I go back to the woodshed to see if I missed something. There's several piles inside, each of different sized bits of wood. I'd just grabbed a couple of medium pieces before, not split in two or whatever, like whole branchs or trunks chopped into shorter lengths.

I assume I need a mix, why else would it be prepared like this. I grab a few bits of the the thin sticks and half cut blocks, and head back into the kitchen. I take out one of the logs I'd placed under the stove and stuff a bunch of the other pieces around it. I try lighting the smallest twigs first. The sparks catch on the bits of sawdust and burn out just as quick, but after a few long minutes of scraping the flint and steel together at various points about the hearth, a fire catches. I nearly put it out straight away by breathing a big sigh of relief.

I coax the ember with a little light blowing, cupping my hands to funnel the air towards it. You see this sort of thing in films and on TV enough to get the basics at least. When it finally starts to crackle and ignite other bits of wood all on its own, I fall back on my butt and sit there in absolute joy. I'm actually overwhelmed by how proud, exhausted, and relieved I am that my efforts have finally paid off, that my previous frustrations burn away along with the kindling. I stay in front of the burgeoning flames for a while, basking in my triumph. Ug! Me man! Me make fire! Ug!

I giggle to myself, while standing and stretching.

"Guess I'm a pyromancer now!"

I go search for a cup, occasionally chuckling to myself some more while the water boils.

I find both pretty quickly. Thank god. I'd have actually been pissed if, after all that, there wasn't even anything to drink out of. I could have made do with just boiled water to drink, but finding a jar of green tea gave me a little more pep. The water takes a while to boil though. It's late afternoon by the time the kettle starts to whistle. I did wake up late, it was already past noon by the time I first went outside, but at least we're not talking golden hour quite yet. Although, because of how tall the trees are around the clearing, the sun is just kissing the canopy of the forest beyond the back wall of the house, so the garden is mostly in shade.

How much longer are my parents going to be? I'm actually starved! I'll have to let them know it's still neglect even though we're not at home.

I pour some of the tea from the kettle into my cup. I'd added the leaves and let them steep in the water for a little after it began screaming across the house. It's still a bit too hot to drink, but my tentative sip proves pleasing enough. I think the leaves mustn't have been replaced recently, and the well water has a slightly minerally taste, but the combination has a real health drink flavour to it, so I can at least pretend it's doing my body good.

I pick my coat up and head back through to my spot at the back of the lounge. The garden has already become a creeping shadow, so I close up the doors and head to the big room upstairs on the west side. I like that the back is south facing. Makes an oversized sundial of the garden throughout the day. I sip my tea and watch the sun set over the forest. This is actually pretty relaxing.

I feel myself nodding off and decide to just lie back on the floor with my head on my coat.

"Wonder what my parents will bring home for dinner?" I yawn to myself as the last of the sun's rays are obscured by the trees. I blink a final image of sky the colour of fire into my eyes before slipping into a well earned nap.