Me and my floating rock gem bunny slowly made our way through the thick mud of the swamp.

“Master, you seem to be in distress. Are the events of our previous battle troubling you?” Carbink said, into my brain, sounding a little worried. The floating gem bunny was still helping me slowly traverse the wetlands.

I tried not to look at them, they were practically covered in mirrors, and the unnatural orange in their eyes reminded me of the looming situation. I just wanted a Pokémon battle or something to distract myself with! Maybe some food. I’m tired, but the last thing I want right now is to wind up in that dream again!

“No, I mean, maybe a little bit. I just hope Serena will be alright after our match” I answered half-honestly. I had to hope Serena losing her first match like that was either supposed to happen, or wouldn’t change anything.

I shouldn’t tell Carbink about all this bear stuff.

It’s weird, I don’t think I can call this Carbink my Pokémon, even temporarily. Something just feels off. Having a rental Pokémon like this. I wonder if Carbink chose to be one, or if they made the choice to join me specifically.

I didn’t even ask them to help me walk, but they chose to anyways. They seem to follow my commands, but they’re not forced to. If I tell them to do something they don’t like, they can safely overrule me.

They looked sad after the battle. I wasn’t feeling too good about it myself…

“Actually, Carbink, I was wondering, why did you decide to become a rental Pokémon?” I asked, curious.

“Master, with all due respect, that information is none of your business. Why do you feel the need to ask that?” Carbink responded in it’s usual monotone voice.

Our situation might be more transactional than I thought. Maybe I shouldn’t ask.

“No reason, just curious. I’ve never had a rental Pokémon before, and I’m wondering what it’s like. No worries if you don’t want to say” I said. I was curious, but I was starting to feel unsure if I should be talking to them at all like this.

We aren’t friends, and we know nothing about each other. They had no reason to talk to me, and they may not have even chosen to be here.

“Curiosity can be healthy, and natural. But, with all due respect, master, I dislike working with inexperienced people who confuse themselves for competent trainers. You appear to have very little situational awareness, and you lack the eyes of one who has seen battle. I fear what will happen when we come across a competent opponent. I will follow your instructions to keep up appearances, but I would rather not discuss any personal matters with you. This is not negotiable”

I guess I do lack the eyes of one who has seen battle or whatever. I don’t have eyes at all! I can see my reflection all over their body. And yet, they can’t tell. They can’t see what I see.

But seriously, this bunny is even harsher than Calem was! This is supposed to be a beginner tournament. People showing up and asking for a rental Pokémon have no Pokémon of their own to use. Of course they haven’t seen battle! This would be their introduction to battling!

I actually kinda know what I’m doing! I know moves from the games, and basic strategy from the show! Imagine if a young, newbie trainer was matched with this Carbink as their first ever battling experience. Their heart would be shattered! And Arceus help them if they wanted to bond with their first Pokémon! I was indifferent if curious at first, but now, I know that this is the last Pokémon I’d want to get along with.

Match me with a Pokémon that deserves a cookie, my butt! Wanting to keep things private is okay, and normal, but throwing jabs in there is just crummy! That’s how the cookie crumbles, I guess. Maybe Carbink puts up a nice facade around whoever calls the shots. Who the fuck made that decision anyways?

“What do you mean the eyes of one who has seen battle? This is the beginner tournament. I chose to get a rental Pokémon because I don’t have any of my own. Most people who opt in don’t have their own, do they? If you dislike working with new trainers, why the fuck are you a rental Pokémon!? We haven’t been in a serious battle yet, how can you judge anyone so quickly after a single win by default!?” I had to ask! I wasn’t just going to sit back and take this.

This Carbink has ended up with the one person in the entire Kalos region who knows how the story plays out. I’ve seen how the characters battle in the Kalos league. I know their tricks. I know every gen 6 Pokémon, and most of their moves. I know every last mega evolution. I know about Pokémon who don’t exist yet. And I show up to a beginner tournament with no Pokémon, and end up insulted? I’m struggling with so many things right now, I doubt this Carbink has even noticed a thing! So much for situational awareness!

“Master. With all due respect. Which, might I add, is none at all, your performance in our previous battle was quite unsatisfactory. I hesitate to ask if you’ve ever attended trainers school, much less properly graduated. Additionally, it is clear you take little to no care of your physical appearance. Many will judge you poorly based on a first impression for that” Carbink chided.

“Are you serious? The battle was like, one and a half turns! You took no unnecessary damage, I led with harden to boost defense, and Fennekin couldn’t do anything. Sure, I tried to help them out, but that’s only because I wanted to! That says nothing about how I’d actually go about battling! If the battle was normal, I’d use rock throw! I had the ‘situational awareness’ to notice that the enemy Pokémon was already weakened before Serena did! What in the world is your problem, I’m doing my best!” I reacted.

Sure, I didn’t go all out or anything, but I played it smart. I’ve seen the show, sometimes beginner trainers freeze up, and don’t say anything. They’re still learning. I think I did okay!

“Yeah! You did indeed notice what was wrong, master. And what did you do next? You didn’t call a single attacking move. The battle would be over in one or two calls. Instead, you made the choice to wait it out. You forced my best-! You forced a sympathetic enemy Pokémon to wallow in the mud until they started to cry, then planned to further prolong the battle. The opposing trainer was forced to surrender, no longer given the choice of losing properly. You failed to notice how they both felt, and earned a victory for your troubles. It seems to have gotten to your head” Carbink called, their frustration beginning to crack through their muted tone.

They had a point. A crummy point, I think, but a point nonetheless.

“Seriously? You want to lecture me on letting an opponent get stuck in the muck? Your option is to pelt them with stones! Super effective rocks! Until they faint! You’re seriously saying that THAT would be so much better!? How do you think Serena would feel about that? Watching her first Pokémon being helplessly fucking destroyed right before her eyes while she’s forced to just watch! You don’t even know just how important that battle was. If I did the wrong thing… Never mind! I was under a lot of pressure, and I think I made a fair choice, it was my very first battle! What? Were you so eager to fucking crush that Fennekin? Your friend? How can you claim to know what she thinks? She kept pushing forward until the end!” I had to respond back.

The morals in the Pokémon world could be ridiculous at times, it was frustrating. This argument wasn’t even a cannon event. I was just unlucky to get stuck with a Pokémon like this. How could this bunny take a moral stance on me already? I hadn’t formed an opinion on them until all this started! I didn’t chose them either!

“We’re rental Pokémon, Oliver. We are here to participate in battle. We haven’t been granted to people so that we can waste time following some ridiculous sympathy. We want to gain experience and strength. I hesitate to even call you a trainer. You have fundamentally misunderstand our purpose, and how to command a Pokémon in battle. And yet, I must work with you for at least two more battles. I predict that in our coming bouts, you will make critical failures, and you will ultimately fail. I hope you opted to participate in this tournament for a poor reason, because you will fail to achieve anything here. You don’t deserve the option to be a trainer as you are now. You should have stayed home. You genuinely worry me… I hate people like you, Oliver”

Carbink broke away from my side, causing me to stumble, and fall over shoulder first into the mud.

“Hate’s a strong word” I muttered, pushing myself back up. “This tournament had no age limits. I could have been a kid. I haven’t even gotten started, and you’re really telling me to give up because I wasn’t aggressive enough!? I never would have done that if the battle was serious in the first place!”

It was no use. The Carbink had heard my side of things, and didn’t care. They saw the whole battle, and they knew my decision making process. I had a single battle with them, and they hate me. Who knows what they’ll do in the next battle, maybe they’ll sabotage me.

“You are a kid. Who do you think you are?” Called Carbink, disappearing beyond the foggy veil.

“I gave you a cookie… where did I go wrong?” I called into the mist.

…

Did I mess up somewhere? Pokémon are meant to be good. As they say in the show, there are no bad Pokémon, only bad trainers. Then again, Team Rocket’s Pokémon said that, and they’re usually evil. Plus, this season of the show features some incredibly fucking heinous Pokémon in it! Genuine threats who need no trainer at their side. Was Carbink a bad Pokémon, or was I a bad trainer?

I could see them having a problem with me being too hesitant to call a decisive move. What I can’t accept is the way they didn’t communicate those issues to me up front and constructively. Sure, Pikachu was awful to Ash at first, but not only was Pikachu a starter Pokémon, who was actually stuck with the boy, but Professor Oak acknowledged it as a problem.

Why would a rental Pokémon chosen for me have that same kinda problem? At least they weren’t attacking me. Not physically, anyways. I don’t know if I could take a rock throw. Then again, I never saw it in action.

Carbinks are tank Pokémon. Being patient and setting up is supposed to be their entire strong suit! A Carbink who just wanted to rapid fire attacking moves would have a hard time ever beating a smart Carbink user who knew when to hold off and when to push with the offense.

Could I earn their trust? Maybe in the next battle, but honestly? I doubt it. They didn’t care about my point of view, or that I was a new trainer. They never cared to consider whether or not my first ever battle was difficult for me. Whether I was prepared to learn from a perceived mistake or not. They wouldn’t care if I was going through something new, strange, uncomfortable, or unfamiliar, much less anything scary and personal.

Also, their eyes are orange. They remind me of the lantern in my bear dream, and the orange light in that flickering mirror hallway. For all I know, they’re related to the bear somehow.

Earn their trust? I didn’t have to!

I had nothing to gain, and they clearly didn’t care about me. If Carbink began sabotaging the matches, I’d be out of here in two rounds. I’d probably go get something to eat with my P$300 prize money, and maybe apologize to Calem when the tournament is over for skipping our meal before making my leave to route 5, and never seeing anyone I’ve met so far again!

Maybe Carbink was right. Was I just wasting time here, looking for a distraction from all the confusion, only to come across more awfulness? Well, I achieved some money here at least. It wasn’t what I really wanted, but it would help.

I wiped the mud off my pajamas as best I could, and slowly shuffled into the fog. Walking was harder without the bunny’s support, but I was fine. I could keep going.

I need to find better company.

…

After about a minute, I made it to our destination. I stepped onto it, finally free of the wetlands. I wonder, were the wetlands and fog artificial creations?

Anyways, it was kind of like a mini, open-air Pokémon center platform, complete with a healing station, assorted healing items, a counter, and a nurse. They were a Nurse Joy, wearing their usual nurse outfit and their nurse hat with a Pokéball design on it. Their hair was pink with two loops, and they wore a yellow O-shaped pin on their nurse dress, whatever it was called. The coloured pins are the only way to tell the Nurse Joys apart in this season.

“Welcome, Oliver! We’ve already finished our checkup, and you’re good to go!” She said, with her usual kind voice.

“Wiggly!” Added a Wigglytuff wearing a similar, slightly smaller nurse hat. Carbink floated at it’s side. The balloon Pokémon looked so much fluffier than normal, and it’s eyes had depth. The moon rock bunny looked just as cute as the floating gem bunny!

Were these Pokémon really meant to be rabbits? They sure had the ears for it! So did Spinda, actually, despite being a red panda. Pikachu and Helioptile both had long ears too. So many part bunny Pokémon! Not that I’m complaining, they’re all adorable. Even Carbink, but they became a lot less cute once they made their opinion of me clear. I was probably two or three wrong sentences away from being bludgeoned to death with a rock! It’s eyes looked a little scary.

How fast was the checkup? I know Carbink took zero damage, but that was quick! Are we going by Pokémon center rules in the games where all healing is near-instant, or the show, where it can sometimes take hours or even days?

Carbink floated back to my side. I tried to look at them, but I wasn’t going to force myself to stare at the mirrors peppering their body just so I can check in and get verbally lashed again.

“Thanks, Nurse Joy, Wigglytuff! Glad to have you guys on standby! Where should we go next?” I asked. I wonder if I passed by this place earlier when I was asleep. It’s where the footprints lead away from!

“Well…” Nurse Joy said, raising up a Holo Caster and pressing a few buttons. It released a hologram showing a light green checkmark. “Looks like we’re good to go! Best of luck in your next battle Oliver! We hope to see you again! Remember to come by a Pokémon Center in the main city when this is over!”

I realized that I had never introduced myself. When did I give her my name? And also, for some reason, her eyes looked a bit sad. They reminded me of Carbink’s. Well, Carbink’s eyes before they started to look annoyed.

I always found it a little strange that Nurse Joy wants to see you again. Does she want you to get hurt again so you need healing? It sounds kind of mean, if you think about it. I wonder who even pays them in this world. The league?

Also, why should I go to the Pokémon Center when this is over? Does Nurse Joy not know that Carbink is a rental Pokémon? I won’t have any team members to be healed!

Then again, it’s worth swinging by just in case! In this gen, they double as Pokémarts, and sometimes even have two clerks with one of them selling town-specific items! Plus, if we’re using the rules from the show, they might even have rooms inside!

It would be worth checking the prices on them. Ash stays in them often, they may even be free to trainers! That would absolutely help my chances here!

Suddenly, just as I wondered where I was meant to go next, the world began to fucking spin around me, and everything faded to black.

…

And when I blinked, it was back. I was back on the healing bay platform with a Nurse. They weren’t a Nurse Joy, though. They were a guy, but wore a similar uniform that resembled something between a dress shirt and a lab coat, with the same nurse hat. I felt a bit dizzy, and started to stumble over.

For a second, I was worried that I had gone to sleep and woken up again, and that the bear had been nearby. Luckily, that was quickly debunked when I heard mention of another piece of sci-fi tech used this gen!

“Whoa! Hang in there, man! First time using a teleport tile?” He said, grabbing my arm to steady me.

I wasn’t aware I was standing on one, but short range warping panels absolutely existed in Kalos! Especially in the games!

The 6th and 7th gyms featured them, but they were also a staple of Lysandre Labs, the area hidden below Lysandre Café. I wonder if Team Flare had a hand in making them. Luckily, they don’t tend to use their overpowered teleportation tech for anything smart, it’s just a cool way for the player to get around.

The nurse was absolutely fucking massive, probably at least 7 feet tall and looked like he could lift a truck! His face and hair looked a little bit strange, like they were just slightly too vibrant. Maybe the background was just too dull. His voice sounded like he was trying to talk in a deeper tone than what was natural for some reason. His hair was rigid and grey. He kind of resembled a buff mad scientist!

He even wore safety goggles to match! The actual Nurse Joys probably don’t issue them as standard for things like this. It’s really rare that we see Non-Nurse Joy nurses in the Pokémon world. The closest we’ve come is the Pokémon doctors like Brock. Of course, they did have to exist somewhere. This old guy sure left an impression, but I wonder if they’re another glitch.

I decided to reply. “Thanks for the save! Yeah, I’ve never seen one before! Can you point me to our next battle?” I asked, glancing around at our surroundings.

Carbink was also floating nearby. Out of everyone, I was the only one who was visibly dizzy.

The nurse’s partner Pokémon was a Jigglypuff. Unlike Wigglytuff, they looked very smooth, like a balloon, matching their Pokémon classification. Odd, has a Nurse Joy ever had just a Jigglypuff? I wonder if you have to do something special to earn the moonstone you need to evolve it. Or maybe you have to provide one yourself!

They’re not so easy to come by, you can either find limited sources in caves, or get yourself a pickup Pokémon that was level 41 or higher. Of course, in this gen, level 41 puts you very solidly on gym 6 level! Or, sneak down to glittering cave and pray you find a 10% encounter rate Lunatone with the 5% chance of holding one. Yeah, that could take 200 random encounters. Who knows what that translates too in this world.

Or you can catch a Clefairy! Despite the literal fairy Pokémon being one of the little guys given the new fairy type this gen, good luck finding one! I think they only appear in the fairy type friend safari! Not really something that would be accessible to most normal people I think, unless Kiloude city is easier to get to in this world. Calem literally has to DEFEAT THE CHAMPION to get the pass to go there!

Anyways, now I want more information on three different jobs, rental Pokémon, Pokémon nurses, and their Pokémon partners! Huh, I wonder what the job market in this world would look like. Could I put this tournament on my resume as experience, even if it goes poorly? Well, that’s just another reason to keep trying, despite everything.

“Ah, to get to your next battle, just follow your gut! This is your second match, yes? Do exactly what you did for your first! Best of luck, Oliver Garden!”

I didn’t give this nurse my name either. Maybe they all had my name, or read the file I submitted. It did have my picture, you could use it to recognize me.

The only problem is, I have no clue how I’m supposed to follow the fucking heart of the cards or whatever. I was asleep and unconscious on my way to the last battle! Without the bear’s help, which I very much did not want right now, I had no way to get there beyond randomly walking, or trusting Carbink, which I’m no longer certain is an option for me. They’d hold this against me for sure, if they even agreed to help at all.

“I think finding it last time was a bit of a fluke, you got any advice, sir?”

The old man looked down on me with slightly crazy, hazy, vibrant eyes. I couldn’t tell what colour they even were!

He gave a quiet laugh, and spoke in an overly fake deep booming voice “Sure I do! Just take a step out there, feel the breeze, and close your eyes! Breathe it all in, and then open your eyes again. Sometimes, when you’re as still as a statue, and as patient as a painting, well… who knows!” They said, giving me the fucking vaguest advice possible.

Though, maybe it would just work. Maybe it would be the same as when I felt eyes on me before, could I sense a looming battlefield or an enemy trainer? I mean, I don’t think so, but I have to try. This world is ridiculous, there has to be a way for beginner trainers to find their battlefields!

Gazing at our new surroundings, this next battle was going to take place in some kind of grassy woodland area. The yellow-ish grass, scattered shrubs, and thin, twisting trees with billowing canopies made this area resemble a savanna. There was no fog this time, but also no clues as far as I could see. It seemed to stretch on endlessly, with no stadium seating or battlefield in sight!

No, that must be some kind of hologram fuckery. The battlefield couldn’t be too far away, it only took so long to walk back last time because of the mud. Luckily, this area was sunny and really warm. It even had a warm breeze, so I was dried off, comfortable, and happy! I love warm breezes, they’re so rare back home! I know this one is probably artificial, but still!

Taking the nurse’s instructions, I closed my eyes, and took a breath.

And…

Nothing. There was only darkness. Darkness, and wind, and rustling plants, and flowing water. Nothing magical happened, like a path appearing, or a hint coming into my mind.

I must have stood there for over a minute. Nobody interrupted me. Not the nurse or his partner, and not Carbink. I was kind of expecting the rock bunny to take a crack at me for wasting time, but it never came.

Eventually, I opened my eyes, and looked around again. Nothing had changed. The plants were in the same place, there was no obvious path, and the sky was still blue. I couldn’t tell if it was the real sky, or if it was one big hologram! Probably the former, but there’s gotta be some kind of hologram wall shenanigans at play here. This stadium can’t have it’s own fucking horizon in it! We ARE still in the stadium, right? What would be the point of it otherwise?

But, my long dormant video game senses were tingling. It’s been ages since I played a video game, but my pattern recognition hidden item treasure chest skills were intact.

One of the trees was facing the wrong way. They all had a slight, tiny right lean to them, but one leaned left. I followed my gut, and started walking towards it.

Before I got a few steps forward, I turned back. Carbink hadn’t followed me.

“Hey Carbink, you coming?”

“Master, you seem fine to walk through your own power over this terrain type. If you don’t need my assistance, why needlessly require me to accompany you? Besides, our higher ups prefer our reveal to be timely, not spontaneous. My trust for you is meant to be earned, not drawn out. I thought I made it clear that you should not speak to me unless you are giving a battle command. Even a poorly thought out one will be acceptable” They replied into my head. A fair point was hidden somewhere in there, maybe I should have returned Carbink after the battle, or at some other point. I guess I wasn’t thinking about it. Well, I was now.

Stolen story; please report.

“Good point. Also Carbink, listen. I know you don’t like how our first battle went. But I’ll prove to you that I can be a good trainer. So let’s just… work together. At least for this tournament, alright?” I said, wanting to at least smooth things out before the battle. It’s not like I’ll see them again after this. Might as well try to be on decent terms. Better than holding a grudge over something so inconsequential.

“Bink!” They replied with annoyance, aloud, and not with telepathy. They shook their head to the side, or rather, their entire body, because they’re kinda just a floating rock. Well, at least I tried to be the bigger person here. They may talk like a floating formal thesaurus, but I’m starting to think that somehow, I’m the mature one in this badly matched duo. Did Carbink even have any battle experience before this? How old are they?

They wanted me to quit talking to them casually? Alright. I’ll respect their wish.

“Carbink, return!” I called, bringing out Carbink’s Pokéball, and returning the bunny to it’s metallic orb home in a flash of bright blue goopy light. I clicked the button to shrink it, and returned it to my Pocket. The Pokéball felt so strange in my hand! I wonder who designed the modern version of them? If there was a cannon answer, I had no clue where it was mentioned.

I turned to leave, and began walking towards the tree, when I heard the nurse chuckle from behind me.

“Pffft! Oh! I remember when I got my first Pokémon!” They reflected in their same obviously fake deep voice. They nearly broke it when they laughed. “They… can be hard, sometimes. A lot of people take one look at a Pokémon, and they just see their appearance, or their powers. You don’t see their past, their struggles, or really anything else. They’re a lot like us, Oliver”

“Yeah, I suppose they are. I’ve been… able to talk with Carbink, using telepathy. We’ve only used that ability to have a more potent argument. We’ve had one battle together, I thought it went well, and they’ve already declared that I’m useless, and that they hate me. It’s… hard to be understanding and patient with someone if they don’t want to give that respect back to you” I responded. I’m not sure why I bothered to. The nurse just seemed approachable.

Their eyes looked a bit wild behind those goggles, but they seemed patient, and well-meaning. They also weren’t a main or even a side character as far as I could tell. I could talk to them without potentially causing anything big to change! It was nice.

“Hmm… hate’s a strong word” He led with. Did he hear me when I said that earlier? No, I said that back in the wetlands terrain area. “I guess all you can do is follow the golden rule. Treat others the way you want to be treated. If they really are a good Pokémon at heart, they’ll make the effort back. Good luck, Oliver” They told me, as if it was some kind of sage advice, and not a simplified moral lesson you’d learn in elementary school or something.

Yeah, obviously it’s nice to treat people well, but do that to everyone, and you’ll get walked on like a doormat! The idea is nice, though. The golden rule is in desperate need of an expansion for how to deal with people who don’t care about how others feel through the way they treat people. There’s no one size fits all solution to life. If you show respect to the wrong person, it’s the same as not respecting yourself, or others that they’re willing to put down.

“Yeah… thanks, nurse” I said, turning and walking towards where my gut feeling led me.

As I got close, The world around me began to stir and glitch and shift around in colourful square pixels. And suddenly, I was standing in front of a battlefield again. It was super cool! But, I don’t really like the feeling of suddenly not quite knowing where I am. It’s… uncomfortable.

…

“AHA! MY OPPONENT HAS ARRIVED!!” Called a gruff, muffled voice from across the battlefield. They had to have been my next opponent.

He wasn’t as tall as the nurse earlier, but he looked stronger, more buff. He still towered over me by a head or two, though. I could almost feel his gaze on me. He seemed to be some sort of fireman.

Despite the heat of the savanna, he wore full black protective gear with neon yellow stripes, heavy black work boots, gloves, a black helmet, and a fucking oxygen mask. I couldn’t even make out their face from the tint and glare! How were they not overheating!? He looked like he could be in the middle of fighting a fire, but we were just getting ready for a Pokémon battle!

Plus, to match his outfit, he was also carrying an entire fucking extendable metal ladder over his shoulder with one arm through it like it was nothing! He kinda reminded me of the Pokémon Gurdurr! The ladder was pretty long, and seemed to be at least 10 rungs long doubled-up, and would be around 20 if it was expanded out fully. It looked really heavy, but to this guy, it might as well have been a foam replica or something.

I don’t even know if he needed a Pokémon, he looked like he could probably win a battle on his own!

“Whoa! You look strong! Yeah, I’ll be your opponent! My names Oliver, how about you?” I said, deciding to introduce myself. It felt nice, to finally meet people I could talk to without fear of mucking up the damn main timeline.

The Pokémon world definitely had firefighters in it. I know a few appeared briefly in the show this season, and I know they become a trainer class in the sun and moon games! They tend to use water type Pokémon, of course. Not the best matchup for me, considering rock types are weak to water! Then again, am I up against someone with their own Pokémon, or another rental?

“Well good morning, Oliver! The name’s Sam! Before we begin, I have a question for ya. Do you have your face?” He asked, as if that was a normal question! Was he able to see that mine was smudged off? Nobody else has, why would he be able to? I decided to be honest.

“No, I don’t. I think I left it at home. Why do you ask?” I responded, curious to see where he was going with this.

He seemed to get excited. “Figured! Come on, put your battle face on! Now, are ya ready for the fight of your life!?” Maybe they didn’t notice my face. Still, I could almost feel the tension in the air begin to twist. It was almost time.

“You’re on, Sam! I’m not gonna give up THIS fight!” A smile curled across my non-existent mouth. Maybe this battle was what I was looking for. All my hesitations from before melted away on the pleasant breeze. It was time for a real fight, and it wasn’t going to be easy.

The ref noticed. They were a different battle judge from before. The girl wore the exact same kind of uniform with the same psychic energy eye logo on it. She had the same red and green flags. At their side was a happy looking Cherrim in sunshine form.

“Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to another Ditto Day Duel!” She called. Again, I saw no audience anywhere. This time, there was no fog. Just clear sky. Sam didn’t seem to care.

“This qualifier match will be a one on one battle! On the left, we have Oliver of Pallet Town in the Kanto region! He has one battle and one win under his belt, and needs two more to move on! He’ll be using a rental Pokémon, but his opponent will be using one of their own! On the right, we have Sam of Camphrier Town! He has no losses, a win streak of two, and needs one more to qualify! Will Oliver be able to pull through again, or will he too be crushed under the weight? Give our aspiring trainer, and our experienced firefighter a round of applause!”

A roaring cheer sounded out from all around us, no source in sight.

Uh oh, I absolutely sounded like the underdog in that intro! What kind of Pokémon was I going up against? I was a bit worried, but my smile never faded. I wasn’t afraid. I’m going to win, or go down fighting. I won’t let Carbink down again.

“There will be no substitutions! The match will be decided when one or both Pokémon are unable to battle, or when a trainer or Pokémon from either side calls forfeit! All battle items are prohibited! Trainers, send out your Pokémon!” The ref said, raising her green flag up into the air.

“We can do this! Carbink!” I called, throwing my Pokéball into the air like they do in the show. In a flash of blue light, Carbink was there. The Pokéball arced around like a boomerang, and returned right into my hand. Yeah, I really needed to find out how these things worked! I shrunk it again, and slid it into my pocket.

“Bink!” Carbink called out like a battle cry! They kept their face towards Sam’s side of the battlefield, waiting for their opponent to show themselves.

They also spoke to me with telepathy “I put my trust in you, master. Do your best”

“One enemy!” Called Sam, as he threw out his own Pokéball with his free hand. The Pokéball seemed to have been customized somehow. It has no paint on it, and looked like a shiny metal orb. Maybe it was fire resistant or something. It worked just fine, though.

The blue light that came out of it slowly formed into the shape of an ice cream cone. I certainly wasn’t expecting a firefighter to be carrying this Pokémon.

“Vanilluxe!!” Screeched the double ice cream shaped snowstorm Pokémon. The second it materialized, I swear, the temperature dropped a good 30 degrees celsius, and the world looked slightly more blue and frosty. They looked exactly like they were made of ice cream with an icy cone coated in icicles. A tube of ice that looked kind of like a wafer straw billowed out visibly cold air.

They looked like a harmless sweet treat, but I knew better. These pure ice types had very rounded stats, leaning towards offense. Luckily for me, their weaker defense was physical, just like Fennekin. Plus, as a pure ice type, they were weak to rock moves. This was going to be a tough battle.

The battle hadn’t begun yet, tough. Sam had pulled a Pokédex out of his pocket, and had begun scanning Carbink. Just like the Pokéball, his dex was unpainted sleek steel. It spoke in an unmuffled version of his own voice. Did he record dex entries himself?

I thought he was a professional fireman up until I heard it. Maybe dex entries created by anyone other than a professor or main character were destined to be strange and incomplete.

“That there’s a Carbink, the fucken big hunk of diamond ore Pokémon! They’re a rock and fairy type, so bonk ‘em with the ladder if they decide to fight you! It’s 4 times strong! On our side, they’re excellent at putting up screens, and using mirrors to peek around corners! Plus, they can share their defense with you in a pinch! Take care of them, though. If too many of their gems, especially the one on their forehead, get damaged, they won’t be able to float, or use half their moves! Luckily, they’re light, and because of their rock type, they’re not weak to poison, and they resist fire!” His Pokédex stated in his voice.

It definitely sounded like the kind of dex entry a fireman would need, though some details seemed strange. Why did it matter that they weren’t weak to poison, and when would they battle a firefighter? Did the fire department in this world have any Carbinks on the team?

The battle still didn’t begin. Sam called out to me.

“Hey, rookie! You’re the new trainer here, ain't ya gonna scan my Pokémon? Ya feeling confident or something!?” He asked, surprised.

“Uh, yeah I’m confident! But, I don’t have a Pokédex” I responded.

Huh, was it common to have a Pokédex in this world? Maybe, if you got yours from the professor. Though, if you have a rental Pokémon, how would you also have a Pokédex? Serena somehow did, but she’s one of the main characters, of course she’d end up with one early.

“No problem! Here, I’m the one who makes these, and I have extra! Feel free to take one!” He said, as he took his Pokédex back out, and fucking threw it to me in an arc that passed over the entire battlefield. It magically landed softly directly into my pocket. I pulled it out and looked at it.

Hold on. Could I really just take a fireman’s Pokédex? What if he needs it? Then again, if he recorded all the dex entries himself, he probably knew all the information. Plus, it was just for this battle, right? I’d return it afterwards.

“Thanks so much! I’ve never had a Pokédex before!” I called to him, before pointing the device at his Vanilluxe. The Pokédex felt so smooth and brand new. It expanded out to reveal a screen. Instead of an image of the Pokémon I was scanning, it seemed to be a 3D rendered image that slowly span around in circles.

His voice spoke out of it. There was very loud roaring wind in the background of the recording.

“That there’s a Vanilluxe! The double ice cream cone Pokémon!! Brrr! You’ll only find these guys in some of the coldest areas of Kalos! These ice types can make a cold mist and frost strong enough to cool down, slow down, and stop most low temperature fires! Plus, they love making snow, and that snow will stick! Really, I’m pretty sure these guys can make genuine ice cream! Keep ‘em on the sidelines, though, they’re weak to flames! For some reason, they come in a buncha ice cream flavours! If they like ya, both heads, I mean, and you ask nicely, they might even make ya a bowl of frozen goodness! If one attacks, they’re weak to the ladder, but they’re sweet Pokémon, I’ve never had to give ‘em a bonk! Put these happy faces on the weather team! They have hail and weather ball up their cones!”

That was an odd dex entry. I’m pretty sure that the snow these Pokémon make isn’t actually supposed to be ice cream. Also, they don’t have variations. Even their shiny form just makes their cone more purple. A bit disappointing, but that’s just how it goes.

That was until I looked closer at the enemy Vanilluxe, and compared it to the spinning 3D image. Sam had sent out a fucking mint chocolate chip flavoured one! It was slightly greener than the white vanilla it’s meant to be! It was hard to tell with the light blue mist pouring out of the funnel on it’s head.

Why would a firefighter have one? I get snow melts into ice, but bringing an ice cream cone, even a strong magical one, to an active fire sounded like a bad call. Why not just use a water type? Still, it was good for me. Rock is super effective here.

Also, why did he keep mentioning bashing Pokémon with his ladder? Is that what fire fighters do when they come up against wild Pokémon so their partners can keep their focus on putting out the fire or something? Those ladders seem heavy, can they really manage to fight a Pokémon with them?

Also, what was the weather team, and why did a fireman feel the need to mention them?

I put the Pokédex away, and prepared myself.

I had no clue what level the enemy Pokémon was, or what moves it had. It could be anything from it’s early moveset of harden, astonish or uproar, and icicle spear, to some of it’s crazier moves like hail, weather ball, blizzard, or even it’s ultimate move, sheer cold, a one hit knockout. It might even have some TMs.

“Let’s have a clean, fair match! Let the battle begin!!” “Cher!!” Shouted the ref, and her floating little cherry blossom creature. It was still in it’s sunshine form. Meaning, the weather hasn't changed from strong sunshine. That means that this Vanilluxe didn’t have the snow warning ability which summons hail. That only left two options…

“Carbink! Use rock throw!” I called, deciding to be more aggressive this time around. Carbink accepted, and within seconds, a large stone the size of Carbink’s entire body was flung at high speeds directly towards our opponent.

Sam stayed calm. "Single icicle spear!” He called. The Pokémon tilted midair to point it’s icy straw directly at the boulder, and shot out a single, fast icicle right at it, shattering the two attacks into into colourful brown and light green dust. I think the ice was mint chip popsicle flavoured!

Rock throw is a 50 base power rock move. Icicle spears have 25 base power, and are ice type, and weak to rock. Though, icicle spear is meant to hit the opponent 2-5 times, dealing somewhere between 50 and 125 physical damage each time it’s used. They had completely stopped Carbink’s attack with a tiny fraction of a move.

They could easily tire us out if I kept calling rock throw. I needed a new plan.

“Carbink, use harden!” I called, wanting to raise our defenses so we could safely get in close.

Sam was ready. “Taunt” he called, and my blood went cold. What level was that Pokémon? They fully evolved at level fucking 47, putting you at gym 7 level. But if Sam caught this Pokémon in the wild, they could be a lower level, as tends to happen in the games. Though, Vanilluxe learn taunt at level 22. This fight wasn’t going to be easy.

The ice cream cone let out the most fucking chilling laugh I’ve ever heard. The defense going up noise that happened last battle never came. Instead, Carbink had begun to charge up another rock throw.

“Bink!” It cried. It sounded angry, maybe even angrier than they were earlier. The rock it threw seemed to be larger that before, and took an extra second to charge.

“Carbink, wait!” I tried to call, but it was no use.

“Load: Automize 10k, then dodge” Called Sam. The command was confusing, but I knew the move. Automize was an obscure move that could raise your speed by two stages, while reducing your weight by 100kg, or 220 pounds. I think Sam had told his ice cream cone to reduce a smaller amount of weight in exchange for a slight boost in speed. Vanilluxe did tend to be around 60kg, or 130 pounds in the games.

Nothing visibly changed about the Vanilluxe, but I heard a quiet click from them, and they dodged the rock throw with speed.

I got worried for a second, thinking that the rock was now heading for Sam, but before it hit him, the rock had shattered against an invisible barrier. The barrier flashed green, and seemed to encompass the entire battlefield. It looked sort of like the move protect from the show. I guess it was for our safety, but who was making it? The battle judge's Cherrim was the only other Pokémon in sight.

I didn’t have time to think about that. This was bad, and it was about to get worse.

Taking a second turn, Sam called another move “Mirror Shot!”

Fuck. A 4 times effective steel move that has a good chance at lowering the opponents accuracy. Inaccurate moves against a fast Pokémon was a recipe for disaster.

Taunt. A dark type move that forces a Pokémon to become unable to use status moves. Only attacking moves will work now. Dodging might also be out of the question.

“Lux!” Called the ice cream cone as it fired what looked like a metallic mirror ball out of it’s mouth. It’s trajectory was shaky and it spiraled through the air towards my rock bunny.

Mirror shot is inaccurate, but it has an 85% of making it’s mark. I had to think of something.

“Rock Throw again!” I called, and in a second, the two attacks met halfway.

And rock throw crumbled against the super effective mirror, disappearing into sparkly dust. It didn’t even knock the mirror shot off course. The power difference was just too great.

I thought of one final command. I didn’t know if it would work, but I had to try.

“USE TACKLE TO THE RIGHT!” I yelled, hoping this would work.

And somehow, it did. Carbink glowed with an orange light, and it’s body was thrust to the side in the nick of time. Maybe I couldn’t dodge normally, but dodging with a move? Taunt couldn’t stop that.

“Whoa! There’s a good battle face! I thought I had ya there! Is this really your second battle, kid?” Sam asked, deciding to talk instead of capitalizing on the pressure and calling another move.

“Yeah! You guys are strong, but we’re not going down yet!” I replied, ready to keep going.

For some reason, that was a cue for the invisible crowd to cheer a loud, roaring cheer. I decided to continue the fight.

I had to be careful. If I gave a command with no attacks in it, Carbink would ignore it, and try to attack anyways, at least until taunt wore off. It normally took 5 turns, but according to Calem, statuses in this world might take level differences into account.

“Carbink, start to move in for a tackle!” I called, waiting to see what Sam would do.

“Bink!” They replied, starting to move in.

Carbink, without using tackle to dash a quick distance, was kinda slow. It had a low speed stat, and that translated here. Still, the battlefield wasn’t too big. We were closing in.

Sam didn’t do anything. I didn’t like that.

“Carbink! Use a big rock throw, then tackle in a random direction!” I called, ready for Sam to try something.

Carbink fired the rock throw, and before it could dodge…

“Harden” Called Sam. A really strange move to have on a mid or high level Vanilluxe.

That’s all four of it’s moves. Icicle spear, automize, mirror shot, and harden. Wow, no special ice moves? Maybe it hasn’t learned ice beam yet, but still, it should learn icy wind, right? If Sam cares so much about speed, why not run a move that lowers your opponent’s?

Wait, there was also taunt. Five moves. Was that allowed?

Carbink dodged to the side as the Vanilluxe’s defense audibly rose and it’s ice gleamed, just before the large rock bashed right into it point blank! The contact shattered the rock into dust, and the ice cream cone was knocked back with a thunk. The move didn’t do much, but I saw a small scratch on the surface of the ice cream where the attack connected.

And then, I heard two more noises. Stats going up, and stats going down. This Vanilluxe had weak armor, didn’t it? The bizarre ability that causes physical attacks to lower your defense, but raise your speed…

“Tackle dodge!” I called, knowing something bad was about to happen.

“Fire!” Called Sam. That wasn’t a move. Before Carbink could get out of the way, the Vanilluxe’s barrel was spun to point directly at it with unbelievable speed! Out of it’s cannon fired a move it definitely hadn’t used yet!

I could only describe it as a large metal icicle spear. It wasn’t the same metal as mirror shot. It was like you combined the metal Sam used to make his Pokédex with the mint chocolate chip popsicle ice the Vanilluxe was made of and used. How did it know to use that? What move even was it!?

The move didn’t shatter against Carbink. The icicle pierced directly through their chest area, impaling them. They fell to the ground like a weight, their ears flopped down, and they went silent.

“CARBINK!!” I screamed across the battlefield. I swore, the sound somehow echoed around us, bouncing off invisible walls.

That wasn’t fucking normal. I don’t think Pokémon has ever aired a battle where any of the creatures in it ended up fucking impaled! I didn’t think they could be! That was way too grim! What in the world was happening!?

I couldn’t stop myself. I found myself running right onto the arena. I didn’t care about the barrier stopping me, which for some reason, it didn’t. I didn’t care about the active battle going on, and I didn’t care about how freezing it was getting as I got closer to the hovering Vanilluxe. I had stopped caring about how mean Carbink had acted earlier. I know I was being stupid, but I had to help them somehow! That’s not a normal Pokémon injury, you can’t walk that off!

I think the ref blew their whistle and waved a flag or something, but I wasn’t listening.

Before I could reach Carbink, Sam had also walked onto the battlefield, also ignoring the ref. Carbink had fallen on his side of the battlefield.

He bent down over Carbink, and started to grab the metal icicle bullet.

“WHAT DID YOU DO!?” I called, furious!

“Hey, keep your wits about you, kid! Don’t stress your head so much” Sam responded, as if nothing horrible or terrifying had just happened!

Then, Sam just calmly pulled the bullet out. I watched in horror, but surprisingly, no hole or wound was left behind. Not even a scratch.

“W-huh!?” I reacted in surprise! What kind of move even was that? You could just grab it, and take it out? Did it even do any damage? Why did Carbink react like that? What did it do to them!?

“Ah, ya might not know this move well enough. I’ve never seen someone react that strongly, though! Ha! You must really care about this Carbink if you’d run into an active battle for it! You’re lucky I didn’t call a follow-up!” Sam responded, with a small laugh in the middle.

Yeah, I guess I was lucky Sam didn’t make any more commands. Who knows what would happen if a human got hit by an icicle spear from a Vanilluxe! Well, I doubt you could pull it out without leaving a hole behind.

“What did you even do, Sam!? I thought it was all over right there!” I responded, still worried about all this.

“Hey, you’ve gotta slow your breathing, kid!” Sam called to me. I think I was breathing too fast, and I tried to slow it down.

“Lux, if you please, would you make this brave young trainer a bowl? It’s been a long mornin’, and they fought well!” Sam said. He threw something up to the Vanilluxe, who ate it. Presumably, it was some kind of food.

Sam then pulled out a metal bowl, I have no fucking idea where he got it from, and out of the Vanilluxe’s straw tube, which I now saw as more of a gun barrel, a burst of ice cream snow shot out, filling the bowl, but also heavily coating Sam.

“Hey! I didn’t need any myself!” Chucked the firefighter lightheartedly as he wiped himself off. “C’mon, sit down, Oliver, wanna know how I won? Don’t worry, Carbink’s gonna be just fine” He continued, addressed to me this time.

I decided to sit in the grass with him, and Sam pulled a metal spoon out of nowhere and handed it to me along with the bowl. What the fuck was happening? We were opponents a second ago, and before that, we were strangers! Is this how firefighters act in this world? The nurse earlier had tried to cheer me up too. Why did all these people care how I felt!? It didn’t feel normal, or natural.

“Y’see, this bullet right here?” Sam explained, holding up the icicle. “It’s a status move!”

“Uh… are you sure?” I replied. Yeah right, it looked like the move spike cannon or pin missile or spikes or something! Maybe icicle spear mark 2!

I tried eating the snow ice cream for some reason. Maybe I was just hungry, and didn’t care that I was eating candy from a stranger. Then again, I was surrounded by people in the middle of a public tournament. This firefighter couldn’t really do anything even if he wanted to.

It definitely wasn’t snow. Either I was that hungry, or the ice cream was just so fucking good! I just started eating it while I listened to the explanation! I felt a bit calmer, like even though I had seen my rock bunny fucking impaled on the ground earlier, there was a different explanation. I wanted to believe that Carbink was okay. This kid-friendly world would absolutely not allow Pokémon to be impaled to death in front of a live audience!

“This is the move automize! I told Lux to load it up into it’s cannon, and when I told it to fire, it launched it out as an attack! Carbink are naturally light, but when the weight spear was imbedded into them, it tripled their weight, and stopped them from speaking, and floating!” To emphasize the point somehow, Sam slowly pierced his hand with the icicle with no resistance, and mimed a few bicep curls before pulling it out, revealing no damage.

That definitely wasn’t normal Pokémon strategy. That was some fucking in-battle cheating shenanigans you’d never see anywhere but the show!

But… it made sense. When Sam called automize, something strange happened. He added the word “load” to the start, like loading a gun, I suppose. Plus, the stat up sound didn’t play.

“Whoa, I’ve never seen that before! Since when can you launch status moves like moves?” I responded with a full mouth.

“Uh… a lot of status moves can be launched at enemies. For example, Carbink learns guard split! That how it can share it’s defense, like I mentioned in it’s dex entry. With the right training, Carbink can even use the move harden on allies to raise their defense! Also, taunt is technically a launched status move. It just has excellent range! Think of it like toxic or willow wisp” Sam mentioned.

Wow, why was this guy in the beginner tournament? Maybe he only had one Pokémon, most enemy trainers in this game only had a few, even the elite 4 only have 4 each! My head spun at the information. Where do you even learn something like that!? I want to learn that ridiculous technique stuff!

Plus, use harden on your allies? Interesting. The bear’s main ability is to soften what it slashes to mush. If I was hardened right back up, would it be unable to pull me or anything else in?

Could Sam beat the bear if it came for me here, and I told him about it? It’s too early to tell. I should hold off. Still, it couldn’t hurt to know a strong trainer in this world.

The explanation was still weird. If Carbink was hit by an automize, it would become lighter, and speed up. Not get heavier and slow down. Or, the automized weight was just transferred, causing Carbink to gain the weight Vanilluxe lost! That weight had to go somewhere, it can’t just disappear, right? Vanilluxe probably got the speed boost while I was focused on Carbink taking the bullet. Clever move.

“Do you… have a book or something? You sound really powerful!”

“Yeah, I do, but it’s personal use, sorry, kid!” Sam chuckled as he got to his feet. He lent out a hand, and helped me get back up. His grip was like iron “Carbink should be back up when taunt or automize wear off. Removing the bullet helps, but it’ll still take time to clear. That could take a while, you should get the nurse to look at them and speed it along” The fireman concluded.

I looked down at Carbink, still laying on the ground in the small crater where they fell. They stayed silent, but their eyes weren’t the signature swirls of fainting. They were still open, moving, and looked sadly up at me.

I bent down and picked Carbink up. The rock bunnies were only meant to be around 10 pounds, but yeah, their weight definitely increased quite a bit. That, or I got weaker.

“Sorry Carbink, I- nevermind. Thank you. Return” I said, wondering if they were going to yell at me for this battle when they were back to full strength. I called them back into their Pokéball, shrunk it down, and slid it back into my pocket. They probably didn’t want to talk right now.

Sam put out his free hand for a handshake. I realized that he’d never put down that fucking massive ladder! Why did he even have it? Anyways, I shook his hand, as good sports should.

“You fought well Oliver, even when things looked bad, you never gave up on Carbink. Remember this battle, and keep moving forward. You have one final life left here. Don’t go wasting it now. See ya around, kid!” Sam said, before starting to walk away, waving over his shoulder with his Vanilluxe floating at his side. Lux was his name for them, right?

As they walked away, the world started to get warmer again. It felt nice.

“Oh! Do you want your Pokédex back!?” I called after him.

He didn’t even turn around. “Nah, I make ‘em, remember? Keep it. Maybe it’ll help you someday” He replied, pulling an extra dex out of his pocket with a flourish. Then, like a hand of playing cards, he revealed that he was truly holding at least six fucking Pokédexes before lining them back up and sliding them back down his pocket. What’s with all this pocket magic today?

What a strange person. I wondered if we’d meet again. Ash and Calem certainly don’t meet this guy.

…

Realizing that I had ignored the ref earlier, and she still hadn’t said anything, I turned to face her.

“Is… everything alright?” I asked, starting to get a bit worried that I managed to get myself disqualified or something already!

“Yup! You’re good to go! I feel the outcome of this battle has been clear, and no announcement is necessary. With the qualifiers not starting yet, your next match may be a bit more popular! Do your best, newbie!” Said the battle judge cheerfully. It was accompanied by a chorus of quiet claps from the invisible ghost audience.

I nodded in response. On that note, I turned and walked away, heading back to the healing station.

I’m going to win the next battle. This isn’t over yet.