"Curiosity killed the cat."

"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

These proverbs represent me the most. My name is Julianne Bach, a healthy eighteen year old teen whose curiosity is unrivaled. 

When I was a little boy I did simple experiments like observing the metamorphosis of a caterpillar into a butterfly. Or taking apart my gameboy because I was curious about how a small device managed to get me hooked and play it for  hours. You might be thinking 'wow he's a smart kid'. 

No. 

Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

In fact, I'm hella dumb. I'm curious about many things because I'm slow. It started off with simple experiments like those. But as I grew older, my curiosity shifted into weirder stuff like the occult, magic, aliens and other shit. I tried demon summoning once because I thought that it would be cool if I had a demon buddy. Well, at the expense of my worthless soul. I messed up so bad and I almost set our basement on fire. I had to be grounded for a month and almost got my ass taken to the monastery to get exorcised. 

Another stupid thing I did is to train like a ninja because I was curious if I could use forbidden techniques. Of course it also failed, what did you expect. I was just branded as a weirdo at school. Who the hell sneaks into the school gym late at night to train ninjutsu? I was caught by the guard and almost got suspended for that. 

But now I learned a lot and matured. No longer am I curious about trivial things. I'm an adult now damn it! So lately I've been obsessed with dating sim games and I'm having lots of fun. I wonder if I could apply my dating sim knowledge in real life and go on fun dates with girls. Only one way to know, time for a new experiment!

"Curiosity did not kill the cat but made it a bit less dumb, if not stronger or wiser."

This is the story about how I tried to live my life as a dating sim protagonist.