After a moment of pause, Munisai continued addressing his point about not cleaning the rust of the bottom part of the sword.
“As for the rust on the bottom part, the Tang. Those are the necessary burdens our swords need to carry with them.”
“Huh? I’m supposed to leave it rusting?” Lawkey asked, confused, “Didn’t you say we have to bleach them or something?”
“Listen, kid.” the old man made sure to look the boy directly in the eyes, “If it weren’t for our burdens, we wouldn’t be who we are today. They may not be pleasant, or horrifying to the point where we would rather simply forget them completely…”
They each thought of their past, the things they would do anything to change.
But that would never be possible.
“But if we want to move forward, we have to accept the past as it is, to embrace our darkness.”
“Embrace our darkness?” Lawkey asked, “Why does everything have to sound so dark?”
“If you find yourself in a dark tunnel, seek your light at the end of it to escape. All you have to do is keep going forward.”
“There you go again.”
“Are you understanding what I’m saying, kid?” Munisai asked, making sure to stay on topic.
“...”
Lawkey ruffled the back of his hair for a second.
“Yeah, yeah, so I leave this part on the Tang or whatever for some reason, right?” He asked, avoiding the right answer.
Munisai didn’t get upset, or react, and he simply blinked calmly and moved on.
“We don’t remove the rust on the Tang so it doesn’t affect the grip on the handle that got used to it.” For once, Munisai gave a direct answer to move the conversation along, “Without it, the connection will be loose, and your grip loses balance.”
“Ohh, that makes sense, I guess.” Lawkey held his chin and cocked his head to the side as he looked at his blade again, “So, what’s next then?”
“Look down at your tray, study the rest of it carefully.” Munisai instructed again.
“...”
Following his lead, Lawkey looked down, inspecting the order at which everything was carefully placed.
In the middle, there were two differently colored cloths, one blue and one light brown. To the left side, there was white cloth that was wrapped in rubber, making a ball at the top. On the right side of the tray, a bottle of what he guessed looked like oil stood, while under it, there was a small plate and a clean tissue on it.
“Go ahead and take the blue cloth in your hand,” Munisai began again, having given the boy enough time, “Then, very carefully, start wiping the blade toward the Tang first, all the while being mindful not to touch any of the rust on it to avoid transferring any impurities over to the blade itself. After that, wipe only along the length of the blade away from you in one direction, and never back.”
As they both did it, Lawkey watching and imitating Munisai’s moves, it was quickly time for the next step.
“Now, grab the white cloth, the Uchiko ball. Be careful with it, it is filled with a powder.” Munisai did as he explained, then continued, “Then very gently tap the Uchiko ball along the spine of your blade first, at about half a finger’s length in between each tap. After that, do the same for each side of the blade.”
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Lawkey complied, making a small mess of powder around him.
“When you’re done, put the Uchiko ball back on the counter, and pick up the other unused cloth.” Munisai said, waiting for Lawkey to catch up, “Then, as you did with the other cloth, do the same again to wipe away the powder very carefully. Make sure to cover the spine as well.”
“All right! Done!” Lawkey shouted, “We’re done, right?”
“Not yet, kid.” Munisai corrected, “We’re almost there, but there is one more crucial step we need to get to first.”
“More?” Lawkey rolled his eyes, “what is it?”
“Now that your blade has been cleaned of its oil, and bleached of its impurities, take a good look at it again.” Munisai put his blade on his cloth, “Its past grimaces are now gone, and the next step is to reapply a new layer of oil. This is your last chance to appreciate all the blade had gone through since its last proper clean up.”
“...”
Lawkey held up his sword, inspecting it. So far, he hadn’t taken any of this very seriously, and was just simply going along with it to make Munisai happy, but that last part the old man mentioned lingered on his mind.
Everything it has gone through, huh? He thought trying his best to ignore the images welling up inside his mind.
But then, as the light reflected on his blade, and its blue wavy pattern, the images he so wanted to ignore began to slowly appear in an illusory form on the blade part of his partner, Eclipsed Dawn, the only other thing that witnessed it all along with him.
The good, the bad, the good, and the bad again.
Over and over, all of it.
From even before his time with the Phantom Rogues.
All the pain and misery of that time, accompanied by the memories of the ones he lost back then.
Then, to the time Jay, Sasaki and the rest of the Phantom Rogues became his new home.
All the moments of joy and sadness, followed by a different kind of pain and misery, which all ultimately led up to more deaths.
To him losing his loved ones again, in all manner of different ways.
To the time he faced the Leviathan, the one who ignited the flames that scorched the battlefield and everyone within it.
To the time he faced the Undying Elder and realized how weak he really was in comparison. That humiliation was still etched on the side of his neck.
To the time he met the tri-colored butterfly, the Shadowy Woman who saved him, merged with his soul, only to be ripped out forcefully and to eventually fade back into the shadows after exhausting her energy. She was forced to leave him alone once more.
To the time he almost led to the deaths of many villagers, Munisai and Jun being amongst them. His new teacher had almost died saving him, and he would’ve just been one of the many who died protecting the boy on that day.
The truth is, if I… If I wasn’t there… none of it would have happened.
The voices in my nightmares are right…
If only I wasn’t there, then so much death could have been prevented…
It’s all my fault, because of me…
…
And yet…
Even though he tried so much not to think about it, not to remember anything, he couldn’t stop his mind from remembering a particular moment from the past.
The very moment when he suddenly fell ill and was bedridden, sick to the point where he was coughing blood and unable to wield his sword.
Truth be told, even his memory of that time was foggy. He wasn’t even sure how long it all lasted. All he knew were the feelings that remained with him throughout, the feelings that helped him somehow push through it.
He had felt so weak and useless then, watching everyone worry about him and run around to find a cure.
At some point they had cried so much, the sides of his bed were drenched in tears. Every time he broke out of his sleep, his heart would break to find one of his loved ones watching him with melancholic eyes.
At some point, he had muttered something he should never have uttered.
“I’m sorry… If only I wasn’t born…”
But those words were not received in a way he could have ever expected.
Even though he had been sick, Jay had slapped him silly, hard enough to make him forget about all the pain the sickness was causing him.
“Don’t ever say that again! We love you no matter what, and as long as we are here, no, as long as you can think of us, you aren’t allowed to think such thoughts ever again! Do you understand?!”
That’s why despite it all, despite all the illusory images flashing on the newly cleaned blade in front of him, he could not utter such words again.
Jay, Sasaki… Everyone… I… I don’t regret it…
I don’t regret being born into this world… Because I got to meet you, to smile with you, to eat with you…
To care for you all…
I will carry your memory with me and live on…
I will keep my promises to you all no matter what...
“...”
Munisai watched the boy enter a trance in silence, realizing what was happening. Although he couldn’t see any of it, he understood very well.
Only Lawkey could see it all, run through it all. It wasn’t some kind of magical feature, this was the process Munisai had mentioned earlier.
The Purifying of the Sword within the Soul.
The incense stick had been burning for a while now, so the top part that was burnt and turned to ash began to fall down, and with it, the dam on Lawkey’s spirit was broken as the tears quickly followed the descent.
Finally, kid… A breakthrough.
Munisai thought, seeing his efforts finally bearing fruit.
“Dammit…” Lawkey muttered as he tried to wipe away his flowing tears, “why now? I didn’t want this…”
He had done his best to avoid direct confrontation, ignoring Munisai’s questions, and answering with his own.
“This isn’t the time for this…dammit… I didn’t want to…”
As Lawkey muttered and fought back his tears, Munisai closed his eyes and waited in silence.
With the physical and inner swords tended to, the next step could slowly proceed.
The training to hone both.
The Sharpening.
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image [https://i.imgur.com/KQmIY8F.png]