Thursday, December 8, 1994
Ravenclaw Common Room
23:17 PM
Percival Ebonwood's POV
"Wait, he got to meet the King of Albania?" Jennifer asked as she swirled her glass of prosecco. "How did your fiancé even manage to do that? Isn't it hard to meet the reigning monarch?"
"Actually, it's not that hard in Albania," Pricilla said, refilling her glass. The firelight flickered, casting a warm glow over the common room. "Over there, to get your heirship legitimised, you have to get permission from the reigning monarch. They go to the palace and have a massive dinner."
"I thought he was the third in line," I said as my Hennessey was refilled. "Why did he go to the palace?"
"He's second in line, and this is an event where the most important families are invited. He was allowed as a plus-one of the invited guests," Pricilla said.
"I might sound like an absolute retard, but what the point of the Albanian Monarchy? Do they actually do anything?" Isabel asked, leaning forward with interest.
"It works more like a constitutional monarchy in muggle Britain than an absolute monarchy like over in Saudi Arabia. The king is the head of state. In a constitutional monarchy, the monarch has ceremonial duties rather than actual governing power. The real political power is held by elected officials. In an absolute monarchy, the monarch has a lot of actual governing power. They dictate how policies are rolled out and what to spend their budget on. They also basically own all the military power.
In Albania, you have the reigning monarch, the king. His duties involve performing ceremonial duties, representing the country at home and abroad, and deciding whether policies are accepted or rejected. Then you have the First Minister. This is the head of the government, similar to the Minister of Magic but with less power. The First Minister is elected and is responsible for hearing the complaints of the common people, suggesting policies, and heading the day-to-day running of the country."
"What exactly does the king do?" Jennifer asked.
"Ceremonial duties," Pricilla replied. "The monarch attends state events, opens Parliament, and meets with foreign dignitaries. They also perform more traditional roles, like granting honours and titles. In terms of politics, they listen to the suggestions of their cabinet, First Minister, and parliament. They can veto decisions and appointments if they deem it necessary."
"I'm guessing there are political parties, right? Like a conservative faction and a progressive faction?" I asked as Pricilla nodded. "Has the royal family ever appointed a First Minister who wasn't the leader of their respective political faction?"
"From the top of my head, there have only been two such instances. The first was in 1738, when the king appointed his best friends as the First Minister, but that decision was reversed a few days later. And again in 1908, the leader of the conservative faction was a right total nob-head, and he was bypassed. He did deserve it," Pricilla answered.
"How does their parliament work?" Isabel asked.
"The Albanian Parliament is divided into two houses: the House of Commons and the House of Lords. The House of Lords consists of 11 of the highest ranking and most loyal pure-blood families. The House of Commons is made up of elected officials. The number of seats a faction gets depends on the percentage of the populace that votes for them. There have always been 73 seats," Pricilla said.
"What about social classes?" Jenifer asked.
"There's a clear hierarchy. It goes from the Royal Family, to the 11 True Houses, to the pure-blood families, to half-bloods, and then to the muggle-borns, and finally to non-human citizens. It's quite easy to climb the hierarchy as long as you have a patron, or are really good at what you do," Pricilla said.
"Do people have pictures of the king in their bedrooms?" I asked, half-joking.
"In their living room, yes. Bedroom, who would?" Pricilla said, chuckling. "From what my fiancé said, everybody has a portrait of the king, and everybody sings the national anthem just before lunchtime."
"Do they actually?" Jenifer asked.
"No, of course not."
"What's their national anthem?" Isabel asked.
"I don't know," Pricilla said. "But it starts with 'May God save the King', I think."
"Why does it have God in it? Isn't Islam the predominant religion there?" Isabel asked.
"Percy, any ideas? You know random facts like this," Pricilla said, turning to me.
"I think it was due to the establishment of the Albanian Monarchy and their Roman lineage. Albania was once part of the Roman Empire. During the Roman occupation, many elite Roman families settled in the area, integrating with the local population. When the Roman Empire began to decline, these elites remained and established themselves as the ruling class. Their descendants formed the foundation of what would eventually become the Albanian monarchy and nobility."
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"So, the royal family has Roman ancestry?" Isabel asked, intrigued.
"Exactly." I nodded. "This Roman lineage is a significant part of their cultural identity. The national anthem, which begins with 'May God save the King,' reflects their ancient traditions and the historical influence of Christianity before Islam became the predominant religion in Albania."
"That makes sense," Pricilla said thoughtfully. "So, their monarchy was established before the spread of Islam in the region."
"Precisely," I affirmed. "The Albanian monarchy dates back to a time when Christianity was more prevalent in the area. Despite the religious shifts over the centuries, the royal family has maintained their ancestral traditions. This is why their anthem and many of their customs still reflect their Roman-Christian heritage."
"Do you think we could ever be a monarchy?" Jennifer asked. "One by one. Let's hear your opinions."
"Yeah, why not? We could have a royal family like the muggles do. They're just figureheads and have no political family. I'm pretty sure that could happen," Pricilla said.
"I'm pretty sure Fudge doesn't want to lose a large chunk of this popularity. With a royal family, he won't be the centre of attention, and that'll probably hurt his little ego," Isabel said.
"We could, but it would never happen. If you want a royal family, wait until one of the royal muggle children gets magic, or try to find someone with the Ambrosius or Emrys lineage, and you have your king. But I'm pretty sure that the people at Wizengamot wouldn't like to play second fiddle to someone else," I said.
"Humph, like they'd ever let that happen," Jenifer said. "Who do you think has the most skeletons in their broom cupboard at Wizengamot? For some reason, I think it's the Weasley family."
We all burst out laughing.
"Why are you laughing? I'm being serious!"
"Go on then. Tell us why, the Great Jenifer Alexandra Pinnock, conspiracy extraordinaire, thinks the red-heads have the most skeletons," Isabel said with great bravado.
"First, have you seen how many of them there are? They fuck like bunnies in heat," Jenifer said, getting a light chuckle out of us. "But that's beside the point. Given that Lord Weasley is the head of a department, he gets paid a lot. How the fuck can they not buy new stationery and uniforms? Unless... they're spending it on something. They're making something. Something big."
"Like what? A 7 kg and 85 cm baby?" Isabel said. "Because that is something big and abnormal."
"No, not like that. I meant, like... you know... Remember Malfoy getting busted a few years ago and the articles about how much he had to pay in fines? Maybe the Weasleys have similar artefacts. Maybe the Weasleys cut a deal under the table to keep the investigators mouths shut. Something like that," Jenifer said.
"So you're saying they're paying someone to keep their mouth shut?" Pricilla asked as Jenifer nodded. "What utter rubbish! I reckon the Minister of Magic has a lot of skeletons. You don't meteorically rise into power by crossing some people and burying a few bodies."
"You know someone who does give me the creeps: Delores Fucking Umbridge!" Isabel said as a few shivers ran down our spines. "Have you seen her in Wizengamot with her fake coughs and her stupid fucking cardigan? Do you remember the funeral? What's his name? Whatever his name was, why would you pick that toad to do your eulogy? I mean, who the actual fuck, wears pinking to a fucking funeral?"
"You're not wrong on that; my money is on Amelia Bones," I said.
"What? Bones? Amelia Fucking Bones?"
"In what mad world would that happen?"
"Come on! Be a tiny bit realistic."
"Hear me out, and hear me a lot. What if, after the war, she wanted vengeance? She made a deal with the devil, and she shot through the ranks. She got to put away the most public offenders, but for the ones where they did not have enough evidence, she had to let them walk and cover their tracks. She may not have a lot, but she sure has buried a lot."
They looked at me as if I were mad, and I couldn't blame them. The amount of shit coming out of my lips could put my arse to shame. I love and hate when I'm intoxicated.
"Anyway, changing topics... umm... what do you think is more impressive: the pyramids or Stonehenge?" I asked.
"Pyramids."
"Stonehenge."
"I bet you're going to mention some article you read, and somehow that invalidates one of the choices," Isabel said.
"I might, but give me your reasons," I said.
"Pyramids because the Great Pyramid of Giza, built around 2560 BC, was the tallest man-made structure in the world for over 3,800 years. Its precise alignment with the cardinal points and the sophisticated understanding of geometry and astronomy involved in its construction are nothing short of remarkable," Jenifer said. "Also, the sheer size and weight of the limestone and granite blocks used. Given the limited technology, the fact that they managed to build the pyramids demonstrates an extraordinary level of organisation and engineering skill. Plus, they are used as tombs and have a lot of ancient knowledge locked up in them."
"Stonehenge predates the Pyramids, and we don't know its actual purpose. Legend says that is the burial grounds of Merlin, and the place where King Arthur ascended to the throne, and we know its key to a lot of the wards surrounding and protecting Britain," Pricilla said. "The stones used for it were also transported over long distances, so that cancels out. Getting the cardinal points is great, but having 56 holes that correlate to 56 distinct points in our planet's orbit is even better. Not to mention the fact that the holes also line up with solstices, eclipses, and equinoxes. Sure, the Egyptians knew the planet, but we knew the stars."
"Both are strong points, but which one are you going to invalidate?" Isabel asked.
"I recently read about a group of researchers, who used muggle techniques such as radar satellite imagery, geophysical surveys, and sediment coring, as well as historical maps and large scale detection wards, that finally found evidence for a waterway leading to the pyramids," I said as Jenifer groaned.
"Come on, that's not fair. Why does it always have to be me?"
"The team was able to penetrate the sand surface and produce images of hidden features by using radar technology and the detection wards. They now theorise that the pyramids are likely to have been built along a long-lost, ancient branch of the Nile, which is now hidden under desert and farmland. This does invalidate one point for the pyramids, as the time scale for this has been cut by at least a third for this discovery; however, it's still fucking amazing that they managed to do that," I said.
"Oh, fuck you. Why couldn't I be right?" Jenifer said as she got up. "I'm going to bed. Goodnight, you two, and I hope the monster under the bed gets you tonight."
"Goodnight."
"See you tomorrow."
"In a bit."
Jenifer had started walking up the stairs, and Pricilla and Isabel necked down their drink as an angry Professor Flitwick entered the room with a first-year student.
"Go to bed, and we'll discuss this tomorrow."