Chapter 22

Trials and Tribulations

A troll wearing a thick, round fur hat with two horns badly taped to it - a sort of homemade Viking helmet - stands before us. He looks kind of ridiculous, but the club in his hand makes any thought of laughing disappear like smoke in the wind.

Alice leans in closer. “Is that what a Minotaur looks like?”

I shake my head. “No. I mean, it looks like Gunwaddle in a hat.”

“That’s what it looks like to me too.” Alice steps forwards. “You’re not a Minotaur.”

“Yeah. I is.”

A small giggle escapes me, more from fear than fun. The troll snarls at me and takes a step forward.

“You’re not a Minotaur,” Alice says. “You’re a troll. I know. I’ve met Gunwaddle.”

“Oh,” the creature says. “Nice bloke, Gunwaddle.”

“No he’s isn’t,” I say.

“Is.”

“Isn’t,” Alice says.

“Is.” The troll holds up a massive green hand, palm out. “Anyway. I’m not a troll, I’m Barangoffo, Minotaur and guardian of this ‘ere labyrinth.”

“Really?” I ask.

Barangoffo makes a face. “Well, she wanted a Minotaur but they was all busy guarding other mazes and pulverising people. Then she got angry. That’s never good. Then she told me I was the Minotaur and sent me down here by myself. It’s been very, very boring. Only squashed two other knights I have since I started.” He nods at us. “You’ll double me tally.”

He tries to heft the huge club onto his shoulder but misses and spins round comically. The club knocks a hole in the stone platform showing the black of limbo below, showing that the rock of the platform is only a few centimetres thick.

“Who’s she?” I ask to keep him talking. I don’t want to think about what’ll happen when he stops.

Barangoffo tries to lift the club again and just manages to get it up onto his shoulder, grins to himself. “She? Who’s she? Only Sabotini. First of her kind, keeper of the eye of Romalesque, ruler of said realm.” He bows and spreads his arms wide.

“Alice,” I say out the corner of my mouth. “Take the left, I’ll edge right.”

She flicks me a glance, gives the tiniest of nods.

“Sabotini’s the dragon that stole the queen’s eye?” I ask. “Cause that’s not what I heard.”

“Then you heard right,” Barangoffo says. “Haalsbeder stole it for her.”

“So, this Sabotini asked Haalsbeder to do it and he just did?”

The troll snorts. “When she asks you to do something. You does it.” He points to the horns on his head and shrugs.

“How about you let us pass?” I ask.

“How about I smash your bones?”

“Passing sounds a better option to me.”

“Not to me it doesn’t.” He flicks a glance at Alice. “Where you going, young knight?”

Alice freezes. I edge sideways.

“Oi!” Barangoffo yells. “You can stop too. Do you think I is stupid, or summat?”

Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.

I shrug.

He roars, bearing blackened fangs, sharpened to points, then charges at me, brings the club down hard but I dart to one side, and it smashes into the floor making the ground shake. I leap back and ready my foil.

Alice gives me a look, bares her teeth then charges at him. “Pro nuquam oblivis.” She yells.

The troll looks up from wrestling with the mighty club. His eyes widen and he throws his free hand up and out catching Alice square in the chest. I hear the breath leave her in an ooof as she flies backwards through the air. She lands by the wall, stumbles backwards. Her eyes widen and she lets out a yelp, teeters, and wobbles.

“Alice!” I yell, heart in mouth, eyes flicking between her and the troll.

She wheels her arms around and around, trying desperately to get her balance, falls backwards over the wall and disappears.

Heart in mouth and sick to my stomach, my eyes flick to Barangoffo. He looks up from wrestling with his club. “You’re next.”

I run and look over the wall. Alice is below, floating just like the pebbles did when we first arrived in limbo. I lean over and hold my arm out to her, but the distance is too far. “Alice,” I say, my voice cracking.

“Get out of here, do it for me,” she whispers before sinking down into the softly swaying darkness. It closes over her like cloth, just her braids on the surface until they too finally sink below.

My stomach lurches. I feel like I’m gonna puke.

She’s gone.

My friend. My compass.

She’s gone!

“No one comes back from the darkness,” Barangoffo sneers behind me.

I turn. He’s got a sickly grin stretching his face wide, showing his fang-like black teeth. A big glob of drool runs out of his mouth and down his chin. I hate him with every part of me. “I don’t believe you.”

He laughs, grunts as he raises his club and charges. I drop into en-garde and sway on the balls of my feet, my eyes never leaving his disgusting face. As he tenses, I drop my shoulder and duck under the club just as it comes down, the air rippling across the back of my neck from the force of his swing. His club smashes into the wall, and I spin round to see the bricks shatter like glass. Dust swirls in the air. He’s hit the wall so hard his club has broken all the way through to the floor and got stuck. He tugs at it wildly, but it doesn’t budge. Barangoffo turns, a look of fear on his face.

I give him a sickly grin to match his own, drop into en-garde and lunge at him.

He deserves this.

“Nexum proxi futuro est.”

My foil bends harmlessly against his chest and I look down the blade, horror swirling in my stomach. The red rubber safety cap is still on. I swallow, my throat dry.

Barangoffo stands to his full height. His fingers let go of the club and grab the end of my foil. He raises it to his face and stares at it. “Whassis? It’s not even sharp!” Taking the red rubber safety cap off he flicks it away to the other side of the platform where it comes to rest against the wall. “Call yourself a knight? You hasn’t even got a proper sword. Did mummy give you this for your birthday?” He lets go of my foil and doubles over laughing.

“Thanks,” I say.

He looks up, tears of laughter in his eyes. “You is the first person ever to thank me for pulverising and eating them. Is very polite!” He bends double, almost choking with laughter.

“Nexum proxi futuro est,” I whisper and bringing my foil down I slice from the edge of the platform, drawing the other three sides of the square in the stone he’s standing on. The foil passes through easily, my heart expanding inside my chest. This better work or I’m toast.

“Hey!” he yells, “How d’you do that?!”

The stone creaks, then tilts. For a heart-stopping moment I think I’ve made a mistake, then his eyes widen and with a last yell, he drops down and back into the darkness. I step forwards and look down at him floundering on top of the flowing darkness.

He looks up and raises a hand. “Help me. Please.”

I shake my head. “No one comes back from the darkness you said, I guess you’re gonna find out.”

He slips under, finally just fingers above the surface in a claw like grip before they too sink down.

My whole body starts to shake, my legs give way and I drop to the rocky floor. My foil slips from my fingers and clangs down next to me, rolls a second and stops. Head in hands I sit there and start to cry.

“She’s gone,” I whisper. “It’s my fault. It’s all my fault. She’s gone.” A sob shakes through me. “What am I gonna tell her mum? What’re my parents gonna say?”

I can see Alice’s face just before she went under. She didn’t even look scared. All that she went through, and me thinking the world had ended because we moved house.

Get out of here, do it for me.

I sling the Angelmere bag off my shoulder and think about the water skin, open the bag and take it out. The water quenches my burning throat. It slides down into my stomach and sits there like a cool stone, radiating calm through me.

Get out of here, do it for me.

I breathe deeply and push myself up then shake the wobbles from my legs. I take another slug of the water, screw the cap on and place it back in the Angelmere bag.

“For you,” I whisper.

Bending I grab my foil then head over and put the red rubber safety cap back on. I throw a last look at the hole in the wall, fight the urge to look again.

She’s gone.

A shuddering breath, then I step onto the bridge and walk towards who knows what.

My mind whirls. What am I gonna say when I get back, if I get back. I’ve got a long road to travel and no one by my side anymore. I can’t not tell the truth, but if I told my parents this, they’d think I was lying. No surprises there. And what would Mrs Werdun think of me, saying something that will sound so ridiculous. Sadness starts to fill me up, but I shake it away. Gotta stay strong. For me. For Alice. For everybody in my life.

I hold my sword out before me, fingers tight on the handle.

Who knows where I’ll land this time?

“C’mon, B,” I whisper.

I step into the darkness, feel it close tightly around me before I rocket forwards into the unknown once more.