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Chapter 32: Repression

The familiar sounds of cars honking and city chatter filled the air, and I felt a sense of nostalgia wash over me.

After many years of being away, I finally returned to my hometown. Everything had changed, but at the same time, it all seemed to be exactly as I remembered. The towering buildings, familiar streets, and our old go-to shops all felt unfamiliar, like a foreign place that happened to match my childhood memories. Everywhere I went, I was met with the feeling of being a stranger in a place I once called home.

I wandered aimlessly through the streets, trying to find something familiar to latch onto that would make me feel like I belonged there. But everything seemed to have changed, and I couldn't shake off the feeling of being out of place.

I stopped at a small café on the corner, the smell of freshly brewed coffee drawing me in. As I walked in, the bell above the door jingled, and the barista looked up, giving me a warm smile. She was a dark-skinned woman just a couple of years older than me, with long, curly hair and bright, sparkling brown eyes. I smiled back at her, feeling a sense of comfort in her welcoming demeanor.

"What can I get for you?" she asked, her voice soft and welcoming.

"A cappuccino, please," I replied, feeling a sudden urge for something warm and comforting.

"Coming right up!" she said cheerfully, turning to the coffee machine.

As I waited for my order, I glanced around the café, taking in the cozy atmosphere and the eclectic mix of customers. There was a group of college students huddled over their textbooks, a couple sharing a slice of cake, and an elderly man reading the newspaper.

Suddenly, my eyes caught a figure in the corner of the room. It was a woman in a white poncho, her face obscured by the shadows. Something about her felt familiar, and I couldn't shake off the feeling of unease that crept up my spine.

My drink arrived, and I took a sip, feeling the warm liquid slide down my throat. It was just what I needed, and I sighed contentedly, feeling a sense of calm wash over me.

"Is everything alright?" the barista asked, sensing my pleasure.

"Yes, thank you," I replied, feeling embarrassed about my paranoia.

As I turned back to the woman in the corner, I saw her watching me intently, her eyes piercing through the shadows. I couldn't see her face clearly, but there was something unsettling about her, something that made me feel like she knew something about me.

I took another sip of my coffee, trying to shake off the unease lingering in my gut. But the woman didn't seem to be going anywhere, and her gaze continued to bore into me like a laser.

Finally, unable to bear it any longer, I stood up and walked over to her. "Excuse me," I said, my voice barely above a whisper. "Do I know you?"

The woman looked up at me, and I saw her face for the first time. I stepped back in shock — it was a face I recognized all too well, a face that brought back memories of a time long gone. A time that I'd tried so hard to extinguish in my memories.

"Mom?" I gasped, my heart pounding in my chest.

She smiled warmly, her eyes filled with love and pride.

I couldn't believe it. My mother, who I thought had died in the destruction of the city years ago, was sitting right in front of me. She still looked as she did when she died — a woman in her mid to late twenties with striking features that were both delicate and fierce. Her dark hair hung loosely down her back, and her skin was pale and glowing in the light of the café.

I felt a rush of emotions as I rushed to hug her, tears streaming down my face.

But I couldn't reach her.

She faded before my eyes, disappearing like a mirage in the desert. I reached out to touch her, to try to hold onto her, but she was gone.

I looked around, trying to make sense of it all when suddenly I heard the whisper again.

"Ikazuchi..."

This time, the voice was louder and clearer. I turned around to see who it was, but there was no one in sight. My heart raced as I tried to figure out what was going on.

"Be careful, my sweet child."

I spun around, heart pounding in my chest, but the café was empty. The barista was gone, and so were the customers. The only thing left was the faint footsteps echoing in the distance. This wasn't right. What was I doing here? The city had... New York City was destroyed when I was four years old.

I stumbled out of the café, the world spinning around me. I couldn't make sense of what had just happened. Was I dreaming? Was this some sort of hallucination? Or was it something else entirely?

As I walked down the street, the memories flooded back to me in waves. The day the city was destroyed, the screams and the chaos, my mother's face as she led me to safety. It had all been so long ago, and I'd spent my entire life trying to forget and focus on my father and my sister. I'd fallen asleep in my apartment, and... here I was.

The streets were empty, the buildings in ruins now, and the sky was distorted and eldritch. It was like the world had been drained of all color and life. I felt a sense of dread creeping up my spine, and I knew I had to get out of there.

Something was wrong. This wasn't just a dream or a hallucination. This was real, and I was trapped here.

But now, it seemed like the past was catching up to me, and I couldn't ignore it any longer. I needed answers, and I needed them fast.

As I stumbled through the rubble, I heard a soft humming in the distance. It was a familiar tune I had heard countless times as a child. It was my mother's favorite lullaby, which she sang to me every night before bed.

I followed the humming, my footsteps quickening with each passing moment. The melody grew louder, and I could feel the hairs on my neck standing up. Finally, I saw her. My mother was standing in front of me, her back facing me. She was singing softly, her voice filled with love and longing.

I closed my eyes, standing firm and keeping my distance, before taking a deep breath.

"Who are you?" I asked, my voice trembling. "You... you aren't her."

The woman slowly turned around, and I saw something that made my heart sink. It was a woman who looked exactly like her. She had the same beautiful, striking features and dark hair, but her eyes were different. It wasn't my mother.

"I'm surprised you don't recognize me, Ikazuchi," a voice spoke out, laced with amusement.

"What do you mean?" I demanded, taking a step back. "Who are you?"

The woman didn't respond and began to walk towards me, her steps slow and deliberate. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest as I took another step back, my hand shaking with fear.

"My dearest Ikki," the woman said, her voice now low and mournful. "I am the truth. You must remember what truly became of your mother."

I shook my head, the world spinning around me. "No, you can't be. My mother is dead. She died when this city went up in flames."

"That's what you like to convince yourself of, isn't it? What you told your father and your sister. That your mother died, so you could forget the truth."

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"What truth?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.

"Remember what you saw that day, Ikki. Remember what happened."

Memories flooded back, and I remembered the destruction of the city. The chaos, the screams, the panic. Zombie hordes and Chaos Beasts snarled in the streets around me as I hid in a closet behind a barred door. We'd been separated from my father and sister, and I ran away as my mother held up a closed door in a dark hallway.

But then, there was something else. Something that I had buried deep inside. Something that I had tried to forget.

And then nothing. My mind refused to remember.

The woman before me grinned as if she knew the answers to the questions I desperately needed. She chuckled darkly, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"You remember, don't you?" she said, her voice quieter than ever. "What you saw that day?"

I swallowed hard, my throat tight as I tried to piece together the fragments of memory that were slowly coming back to me.

"I...I saw my mother... she was fighting them. The zombies. And then...she was bitten. I saw her turn into one of them," I whispered, my voice trembling.

No, that wasn't right.

The woman shook her head, "Again, that is a lie you tell yourself. You've had the context to understand it for a while but your young mind couldn't comprehend what you were seeing."

"Then what really happened?" I asked, my heart racing.

"That is a question for you to answer, Ikki," the woman said, taking another step towards me. "You were there. You saw it all. You know the truth. Search within yourself."

I felt a knot form in my stomach as I tried to make sense of what was happening.

I closed my eyes, trying to remember. The images were fuzzy at first, but then they became more explicit.

I opened my eyes to find myself walking out of a heavy metal door and stepping into a hallway.

I walked down the hallway, my steps slow and deliberate, my heart pounding in my chest. The walls were charred and blackened, and the air was thick with smoke. I could hear the distant sound of gunfire and explosions and knew the city was still under attack.

As I turned a corner, I saw her. My mother was in a white evening dress fighting off a group of zombies in a lobby. She had a naginata in hand, gleaming in the dim light. She was fierce and graceful, and I felt a rush of wonder watching her.

But then something changed. One of the zombies managed to grab hold of her, sinking its teeth into her flesh.

Normally, chaos beasts implanted their victim with an energy payload meant to spread the zombie effect until the victim ran out of excess energy to spread. As soon as the energy overcame the victim's defense, their transformation was almost instantaneous.

I remembered what happened to her; it was an experience that I wished I could forget. The anguish on her face and the pain in her eyes as she fought against becoming a zombie.

But that memory was incorrect. I... I remembered now.

My mother shrugged it off as if it were nothing more than a mosquito bite. She turned around, her face twisted with rage, and I saw something I'd never seen before in her eyes. They were glowing with a bright, white light, and they were fiercely determined. My mother's body shined briefly, and then there was a blinding flash of light.

My mother lifted the zombies off her, one by one, and flung them across the room. It was like she was superhuman, stronger and faster than anything I'd ever seen.

The last zombie in the room lunged toward her, but she was ready. In one swift motion, she plunged her jeweled naginata into its chest, piercing its heart. The zombie let out a final moan and crumbled to the ground.

"Ikazuchi? Honey? Are you alright?"

She rushed over to me, her face gentle and full of concern. Her dark hair was slightly disheveled, but she was still the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. She was now wearing an ornate red and white kimono, and her skin glowed with otherworldly radiance. Her eyes were still shining with that same bright light.

"I...I didn't know," I said, my voice barely above a whisper. "I didn't know you were like that mommy."

She stood there for a second, looking over her shoulder with a look of regret and tears in her eyes.

"There's so much I couldn't tell you, my son," she said, stepping towards me. "So much that had to be kept secret for your safety."

I looked at her, my mind still struggling to comprehend everything happening. But her words made sense to me in a way that nothing else had.

"I understand, mommy," I said, stepping towards her. "But...what happens now? What do we do?"

My mother's expression turned grave, and she looked at me, her eyes filled with sadness.

"My sweet child, I need... I need you to do something for me."

I nodded quickly and looked up at her.

"What do you need me to do, mommy?"

Her face softened, and she pulled me into another tight embrace. "I need you to be brave. You must listen to me, no matter what happens. Do you understand?"

And then she stepped back, wiping the tears from her cheek.

"Y-yes," I choked.

"Good," she said, her voice strong and determined. "I am going to confront the monster responsible for all of this. You go back to the vault and hide. Do not come out and find me as you did before. Your father is on the way with your sister... I need you to protect her from now on. Whatever you hear; whatever happens, do not come out. Do you understand?"

"I... I don't understand," I said, my voice trembling.

My mother's expression softened, and she took my hand. "I know it's hard, Ikki. But you must trust me. You're the only one I can count on. Please, my sweet child. My brave and brilliant son. My last wish is for you to keep your sister safe. Can you do that for me?"

I nodded, feeling the tears welling up in my eyes. "I... I'll do it," I said, my voice trembling.

My mother hugged me one last time, her body shaking with emotion.

"Remember, my heart and soul," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "My beautiful, precocious son. I love you. Always."

I felt the hot tears streaming down my face as I relived that memory. One truth I had refused to acknowledge for so long now stared me straight in the face.

"She... she was a..." I whispered, the words barely escaping my lips as the world around me swirled again.

The woman wearing my mother's face walked in front of me, a small smile on her lips. She was now dressed in my mother's red and white kimono.

"That was quite the farewell, wasn't it? Yes, she was. One of the greatest in her generation before she retired, in fact. But a touching moment like that wouldn't be enough to make you bury your memories like that, would it?"

I shook my head, trying to make sense of everything. "I don't know why I forgot. It was too much to handle, I guess."

The woman nodded, still wearing my mother's face. "Yes, it was. You were young and traumatized, and your mind couldn't process what you had seen. But now, I believe you are ready to confront the truth."

I looked at her, my eyes filled with questions. "What truth? What else have I forgotten?"

"The answer lies within you, Ikki," the woman said in a kind yet adamant voice. "You possess the capability to bring your memories back from the shadows. All that's left is for you to summon the courage to confront them."

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, trying to clear my mind and focus on unlocking my memories. It was like finding a needle in a haystack, but I knew I had to try.

Images began to swirl in my mind, disjointed fragments of memories that didn't seem to make any sense. I saw my father arguing with my mother about something, my baby sister crying in the corner, and a strange man in a black cloak watching us from the shadows.

And then, suddenly, a memory came flooding back to me with such clarity that it took my breath away.

I couldn't even keep a promise to my mother. I had chased after her.

The air was thick with the smell of decay and rotting flesh. I could hear the distant sound of moaning and groaning from around me. I remembered seeing my mother, alive and well, standing tall in the midst of the destruction after it'd settled. She was... confronting something. Someone? There was another woman there... multiple people.

The woman was holding something in her hands that glowed with an otherworldly light. But I couldn't remember what she looked like.

My heart was racing as I tried to piece together the memory, but it was like trying to fit a square into a circle. The woman in my memory was just out of reach, her face blurred and indistinct.

I took a step forward, trying to get a better look. Still, the images in my mind faded away, leaving me feeling disoriented and confused again.

The woman beside me steadied me with a gentle hand on my shoulder. "Don't worry, Ikki," she said soothingly. "You do not have to remember everything right away."

I looked up at her, feeling a sense of apprehension and suspicion. "Who are you, really? And why do you look like my mother?"

The woman smiled, but there was a sadness in her eyes that made my heart ache. "The walls between your world and the Imaginary Plane grow thin once more, Ikki. Sooner than later, the next Imperatore will descend upon your world, and I must prepare you for what is to come."

She paused, her eyes glancing towards the horizon as if seeing something in the distance that I couldn't. "As for who I am, think of me as a guide. A mentor. And as for why I look like your mother," she trailed off, a knowing smile on her lips. "Well, let's just say that I knew her well."

I stared at her, feeling a mix of emotions I couldn't quite describe. Part of me wanted to trust her and believe she was here to help me. But another part of me was afraid, afraid of what I might find if I dug too deep. I was also highly suspicious of this mysterious entity.

"What do I do now?" I asked finally, my voice barely audible.

The woman's smile turned gentle. "For now, Ikki, you return to that body of yours and rest. I am afraid we are out of time, for now."

I nodded, feeling a sense of weariness settle over me. "I... I suppose," I said, my voice barely above a whisper.

The woman placed a hand on my forehead, and I felt a wave of drowsiness wash over me. "Sleep now, Ikki," she said softly.

And then, everything went black.