"Conrad!"

I woke with a scream and could feel my pajamas drenched with sweat. Looking around, it was still night; I was still in my dorm room, panting heavily… I felt lucky that the curtains blocked all noises, or I would have woken up my roommates multiple times in the past month. Looking out of the window to my right, I could see the clear, starry sky and the moon shining, but it gave me no real comfort. I could swear that I heard him scream in my dreams… and I could only hope that it was my nerves and nothing else.

I no longer had the will to lie back and sleep, so I put on my slippers and quietly walked out to the common room, which was empty. The fire had long gone out, but with a flick of my wand, it was roaring again, and I sat down, watching it. Too many things had happened, and I was still trying to make sense of it. I couldn't tell if I was sad that my grandmother was gone… or not. She was never kind to me… I never felt… love towards her. So the news of her death was, although surprising, even shocking… Looking back, I didn't really feel bad about it. What I was angry about was that they took everything that should have belonged to me… to us, with Conrad. Now it was gone…

I just hope he won't be gone. I exchanged letters with his… well, now also my Father. He is seemingly holding up well, but he doesn't write much in his letters. I know he is just as worried as I am… but I also feel something is happening in the background. Call it my… female intuition. As to what that is? I don't know, but from what I saw, the Headmaster's hand must also be in it. I am not in a position to ask and to not bring trouble to my family; I won't. Yes… family. With the official announcement from HIS lips, I guess I am no longer only the fiancé of Conrad but his wife. Which is the only good news in all of this mess… Now I can do nothing but wait for my husband to return… No. That is wrong… I can do many things…!

I can't let myself be overwhelmed and allow my nerves to crumble! I have to prepare for everything! First things first, if he is in trouble and getting tortured, I will have to make sure when I get him back, I can soothe all the pain… both in body and mind! I will have to learn new charms and brew potions that can help with that! I will also have to start learning curses! I still had his book, took it to my room before they could find it if they decided to go through his belongings… I let myself lament for far too long; I could have used these days to learn the killing curse and all that is to it instead of worrying! If something happens to him… I will have to use it well and kill Voldemort myself!

…

….

……

"Young Missy, you should rest!"

It was the voice of Professor Lockhart, who came into the Dark Arts classroom as our new teacher. After Lucius's death, he was again appointed to the position, and it was finally made permanent. Every day, I would come and train myself with the new spells we were learning right until dinner. Then, after eating a little, I would go to Professor Slughorn so he could teach me potion-making. He never said no to it… he tried to tell me to rest and not push myself too hard, but he seemed to understand that if I let my mind rest, I would start worrying again.

"There is still half an hour until dinner!" I answered, wiping my forehead.

"Missy…" He sighed, trying to keep that silly smile on his face, "You look worse for wear than me after fighting that group of vampires in Transylvania! A young beauty shouldn't let herself wither away! Especially when she should be in full bloom, waiting for her bee to return!"

"Err…" I couldn't help but flinch. It was poetic… but also… creepy, hearing it coming out of his mouth. I know he is a writer, but… still. "I will take care of myself." That was the only response I could think of.

"That would be the best! Now, let's stop it here so you will have time to rest a little! Eat and sleep well tonight!"

"Professor…" I said, turning towards him. Although we had our thoughts about him… it seems he still has a side that can be liked. "Thank you."

I think it was the first sincere thanks he received because I had never before seen him look... embarrassed. Maybe he was right… so I took it a bit more relaxedly. I rested in the common room, which meant that I sat alone, looking at the ceiling before going to have dinner and head to the office of Professor Slughorn. We were working on the potion we gifted him, and he was also teaching me easy-to-make ones that could help alleviate pain and the troubles of the mind.

"Now… you should take one of these tonight!" He handed me a finished one at the end of our session, already close to midnight.

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"Professor?" I asked, surprised as I knew that the potion in my hand would make me sleep… probably long enough to miss half of the classes tomorrow.

"Just do it." He expressed, and it was more of an order than a suggestion. "I will check on you tomorrow; if you didn't drink it before going to bed, I will make you drink it! Understood?"

"Yes… Professor."

"Good!" He smiled, rubbing my head, "Now go, Miss Anguine!"

Somehow, hearing him call me made me really happy… so I didn't argue and drank the potion, and for the first time in a month, I had a long, deep sleep without nightmares.

…

….

……

"Is this all?"

I wanted to answer something crude… but no word could leave my mouth at that moment. I was lying on the ground, trying to fight back with my mind, breaking free from HIS curse and regaining control over my body.

"Are you going to disappoint me, Conrad… Anguine…?”

The sarcastic smile on HIS face and the way HE was twirling HIS wand made me angry, and I felt my blood boiling again, resisting and finally expelling HIS thoughts from my mind, allowing me to stand back up, panting for air.

"See…?" HE chuckled, licking HIS lips, "You can do it if you want to. The Imperius curse is something that only the weak have to fear! A strong enough mind can shrug it off! I let you hit me with it because it does not affect ME! Do you understand why? Because my will is stronger than any other wizard!"

“It… is still… hard…” I moaned, trying to regulate my breathing as the spell ordered my body to exhaust itself, doing jumping jacks and all kinds of moves, getting repeatedly harder and harder, sometimes close to breaking my neck in a wild front or backflip. There were moments if I didn't regain my faculties, I would have been dead. I would have thrown myself off the cliff we were at.

"For a weak mind." Lord Voldemort nodded, scrutinizing me. "But you are throwing my spell off again and again… Taking less and less time every turn. Fascinating."

"Thank… you?" I asked, straightening my body and dusting off the dirt from my robes. Looking around, the wind was strong, the sky was partially cloud, and I could see the waves crashing against the rocky coastline. I don't know where we were… even if we were still in Britain or not.

"Why do you think I train you?"

My honest answer almost escaped my mouth… saying that HE was not training me but torturing me. In the past month, besides 'coaching' me to resist the mind-controlling curse, HE was demonstrating to me many others… and by demonstrating, I mean HE was casting them at me, and if I failed to dodge, fight back I was in for a significant amount of pain. Under my robe, I already had multiple scars that I was sure would never fade away… but the anger it brought with it made my mind and blood boil, and somehow, I always got through it.

"Establishing a legacy?" I asked uncertainly. "I heard that Your Excellency wanted to teach at Hogwarts before."

"Yes." Came HIS cold answer. "I always had my mind on teaching the young generation, raising wizards and witches who are loyal and capable! Just look at the Malfoys… One man simply can't trust people who are not committed to the cause."

"So… What cause should I be committed towards?"

"My cause, of course!" HE laughed gently, walking past me, which was a clue to follow, so I did. "I don't fully trust your father. Although, I don't fully trust many other wizards either. I am training you so you can see my powers firsthand. I am not giving out my legacy because I don't need to. Simply because I AM the legacy! I conquered Death itself, young Congrad Anguine." As HE said that, looking at me from the side, HIS eyes were red as a ruby, and HIS smile was savage, "I will always be here while you and the other families will grow up, grow old, and wither away. This part is still a foreign concept to the generation that grew up when I did. That is why I must focus on the younger ones."

"I'm still not really following you, Your Excellency."

"You do." HE shook HIS head, "You just want to know more, but so be it! I am in a good mood, so I will tell you more! As long as you are loyal to me and continue showing such great potential, you will be able to rise to the same position as Severus Snape… and replace him. I will always need capable people at my side who I can trust… with everything." HE whispered, leaning closer to me, patting my back, and even rubbing my head. Damn… HIS hand was freezing… cold as death. "As long as you are loyal, your family will thrive. You and your little wife's life and well-being will be guaranteed no matter what happens. Those who I trust, I protect, you see… I take care of my… friends."

"Meaning…?" I asked, gulping down the lump in my throat as I felt fear, the same kind of fear when we were sitting inside the carriage that took us here… wherever the 'here' was… because most of the nights HE disapparated, leaving me alone here to do whatever before appearing in the morning.

"Meaning…" HE looked towards the horizon while speaking as we arrived at the edge and faced the grey, wild waves of the ocean, "That your bloodline can thrive. Not just now but for all eternity, serving me. Your children will have my support, and not just your life would be pleasant, but theirs too. Serving me faithfully is a guarantee for lifelong success! And in this case… the success of your unborn children, Young Conrad Anguine. Think about it: What's more important? An unpredictable future where anything could be taken away from you with a snap of a finger? Or a stable and clear hereafter, where the safety of everyone you love and cherish is guaranteed?"

HE didn't wait for my answer as he simply disappeared, signaling that our discussion was over. Not that I had an answer for him… I felt confused… unsure… lost.

"Haah… I wish Quincy was here… so we can talk it out…"