“The stable’s on fire! Quick!”
They tore down the stairs, out through the front door, but despite the intense fire raging in the stables, they both stopped suddenly.
Out across the land, on the other side of the perimeter fencing of The Ranch they lived and operated from, stood around a hundred figures, lit by the flame torches they held and the lights from their motorbikes.
In the middle of the pack, unmistakably, was Outlaw himself.
“Motherfucker,” Reuben growled, pulling Effie away and back to the matter at hand- the arson of their ranch, and the likely murder of the horses and their own trusty steeds.
Reuben ran for an external wall, grabbing a hose and running with it to the stables. He turned it on and water began gushing. Effie came to his side, doing the same.
“Here, take this one too,” she said giving him the hose. “I’m going to get the horses out.”
Reuben was now stood with two firefighter hoses, one in each hand, aiming them for the flames. He saw Effie run into the blazing barn and looked over to see the angry mob still out there at the perimeter fence.
He felt the rage build within him, the tight feeling in his chest growing, but he tried to focus on keeping it down for now. Once the fire was out and the animals safe, he would totally allow himself to succumb to the anger.
Effie broke down the stable doors, allowing the animals to charge out. She went further in the smoke and flame filled out building to locate her steed and Reuben’s bull at the further end.
They were usually placid creatures, trained to not let much spook them, but this inferno and thicker air was frightening them.
“Woah woah, it’s ok. Mama’s here,” she said, soothing them. “It’s ok, we’ll get you out of here.” She pulled her horse out first, giving it a whack on its hind leg to giddy it up to run out, and then she turned her attention to the bull, which she led out herself.
Beams began to crack and break apart, raining down around her, but Effie escaped out just in time.
“How many did you count coming out?” she asked Reuben.
“Ten,” he answered.
“Ah shit,” she shouted out over the noise of the fire, and gushing waters, taking the second hose from Reuben. They had fifteen before the fire. “Have they moved at all?” she asked, referring to the mob outside.
“Nope, but they will after we finish with this. They’ll run with fear,” he snarled just loud enough to be heard. “Drop that, and go and get our gear. Once this is out, I ain’ waiting.” Effie turned the hose off and ran into the house. After a few minutes, she returned with two holdalls, dropping them onto the floor near them.
The fire was out enough for Reuben to not be worried about it spreading. There was more smoke, as it cinematically drifted across the ranch, partially obscuring Outlaw’s mob from them.
In nothing but his pants and boots, Reuben put on his double tan leather shoulder holster, picked up his shotgun and to finish, his hat. Effie having only been able to throw on a long shirt and put on her boots before coming out to the fire, was equipping herself with her lasso and desert eagle in a shoulder holster.
“I can feel it coming,” he said to her. “And it feels beautiful.” With that, they both charged through the smoke towards the perimeter fence.
As they cleared through the main bulk of the smoke, they were in clear view of those waiting on the other side. And seeing them charge, spurred them into action. Motorcycle engines roared into life, accelerating away and bringing down the fences that were chained to the back of their bikes.
From the gaps they made, there was a rush of bikers that charged towards them, swinging chains, baseball bats or crowbars.
Effie ran onto a boulder and used it to leap high into the air, from where she started shooting and picking off any bikers getting too close. Reuben fired off shots with his shotgun, splattering the charging invaders at the front of the pack with pellets. The tightening in his chest intensified and grew until when it felt like a balloon and had been popped, he entered rage mode.
He pumped off a few more shots, emptying the mag and discarding it. One by one, he savagely beat on the hordes of bikers, flinging them like ragdolls, tearing shoulders out of the joints and caving skulls in from the nose.
Something whacked Reuben across the back which did nothing more than piss him off. He turned to face the biker responsible who had a look of fear in his face and he said to him, “Is that all you have?”
Reuben punched with his two closed fists straight into the man’s chest. The force of the punch was so hard that he broke through into the biker’s torso. Taking hold of splintered rib cage, he pulled back, tearing the biker open in an eruption of blood, bones and muscle. Reuben dived back into the chest cavity with one hand before the body had a chance to drop to the ground, digging his hand back in towards the spinal column and tearing that out. He roared and grabbed out at another biker, wrapping the spinal cord of his friend around his neck, stopping him from heading straight for Effie.
Effie meanwhile was using her lasso to incapacitate her victims, throwing them into each other, bisecting them with the rope or blasting fifty calibre bullets straight between the eyes with her desert eagle. She looked over at Reuben and thanked God that he was in his berserk mode. He moved with such speed between each attacker and with such brute force that told her they were going to win this.
Within ten minutes, the vast space of the Ranch land was littered with deceased Liberty Diablo bikers. When Reuben’s last kill dropped to the floor he looked out for Effie who had by now finished herself and was looking out towards the outside of the compromised perimeter fence.
There, unmoved was Outlaw, flanked by two bigger Liberty Diablo bikers. Outlaw was dressed in all black. He was wearing the hood of his poncho up under a black cowboy hat that concealed his face in shadow.
Legend had it that Outlaw’s left arm was just bone, his skin and muscle pecked away by possessed birds where he lay unconscious, having succumbed to the heat in the desert whilst on a quest for The Lost Dutchman’s Goldmine decades ago.
Other stories said that Outlaw was actually a dead person resurrected, but Effie couldn’t understand why someone who came back from the dead would need to produce drugs, and there were even suggestions he was the devil incarnated but a fight with an angel stopped his transition to disguise himself in human form part way through, leaving his skeletal arm ‘unfinished’.
Either way, Reuben was determined to kill him here and now. “Outlaw’s mine,” he snarled. Effie could see his eyes were still pure black and knew there was no persuading him otherwise. He paced over purposefully, Effie following close behind.
Outlaw and his body guards remained unmoved until Reuben started charging, then they did the same. Reuben ran for the guard on the right, Effie at the left one. Reuben leapt towards his guy, mounting him with his legs out, and using the momentum to spin onto his shoulders. From his vantage point, he wrapped his legs around the body guard and took his head in both hands. With minimal effort, Reuben twisted his head almost 360 degrees, snapping the neck clean from its base.
You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author.
Effie had dodged a kick from her guy, rolling and taking out the knife from his boot. Before he realised, she stabbed twice in his calf, bringing him down onto his good knee. Having the height advantage over him now, she stuck the knife into the base of his neck and pulled it down, filleting him like a fish.
Outlaw stood there, watching silently as The Rodeos made light work of his last remaining soldiers. Now it was his turn.
“Any final words?” Reuben asked.
“You are formidable, I give you both that. Taking out my Lace lab though, is what has sealed your fates.”
“We’re not big talkers here, so quit with the wobblin’ jaw,” said Effie.
Outlaw’s arms shot out from his cape, revealing two handguns that glistened in the moonlight. “Have it your way,” he said just before firing shots at them causing Reuben and Effie to jump out of the way. Each shot, narrowly missing it’s target.
When the bullets ran out, Effie was ready, swinging her lasso loop towards the cloaked bad guy. To Effie’s complete disbelief, it bounced off. She never missed. The distraction was enough for Reuben to sneak a jump attack, hurling himself towards Outlaw from the air.
At the last minute, Outlaw managed to raise his arm to protect himself and Reuben collided with that, bouncing off on impact.
“Who the fuck are you?” growled Reuben in anger, getting up quickly. He tried to gauge an idea of who he was looking at, looking for any distinguishable feature, but Outlaw’s face was still shrouded in darkness.
“Unstoppable,” Outlaw simply answered.
“No, you’re not. There’s a way to stop everybody. We’ll just have to try every way to find yours,” Reuben seethed back. He felt his rage build and let himself succumb to it, and in a synchronised fashion, The Rodeos leapt towards Outlaw for another attack.
He turned to face Effie head on, timing a gloved punch to the centre of her face just as she was in range. Reuben landed on Outlaw’s back who threw him over his shoulder as Effie landed on the floor with a whack herself.
Outlaw stepped towards Reuben who was attempting to get back up. The caped creep kicked out, making contact with Reuben’s face. His head violently turning to the right as he absorbed the shock. Reuben stayed there, eyes screwed tightly closed as he channelled the pain into an energy he could harness, and braced for another hit. But it didn’t come.
He opened his eyes to see what was happening, but had to shut them again. A blinding bright light hovered above them. It took no form, no defined shape.
He squinted over at Outlaw, who had taken the knee before it. He was petrified.
“You forget that you aren't unstoppable,” a calm, female voice said from the blinding light. “Your curse may prevent you from having your existence ceased by conventional means, but there is always a way. And it is these two who will find it.”
“These two? Eh, they’re just as cursed as I am, remember? You of all things should know that.” Outlaw bravely shot back, looking squarely at the Rodeos. “For a bright light, you ain’ so bright.”
For that, Outlaw was struck with a bolt of white lightning, sending him flying off balance and back a few metres. As he got up, he quickly had to lift his fallen hood back up, but it was too late. Reuben and Effie had already had a brief glimpse of what their fearsome foe looked under the shadows of the hood.
“Holy fuck, was that...?” Effie whispered, coming over to Reuben’s side.
He couldn’t take his eyes away as he replied, “Yeah… I think that was… was a skull? Is Outlaw a fucking skeleton?”
“Just when I thought I saw it all,” Effie muttered.
“This isn’t the last of this,” Outlaw shouted out to the Rodeos. “This Harlot is wrong to think you’re the ones to stop me. I’ll go now, but I will be back for you. I will get vengeance.”
“Let me help you with that,” the voice of the bright light said, picking him up by an invisible force that flung him far out into the night like the unwanted trash he was.
“Us? Really?” Reuben asked the light. “You reckon we’re the ones to end that thing? It's head is a skull. Somethin’ ain’ right there.”
“I will guide you on your course.”
“You’re the one who put us in this mess in the first place. Why would we want to go on this new course you set us on?” challenged Effie indignantly.
“I will return in time with news of what you will do.” The voice said, ignoring the questions being posed at her. And in a blink of an eye, the light disappeared.
“Have I said before that I hate that bitch?” Effie said. "She just appears and disappears."
Reuben said nothing, and instead looked up at the stars. “It’s a beautiful night.”
They remained stood there, quietly contemplative, in the desert under the moonlight and surveyed the mess of destruction around them.
***
The day after the showdown with Outlaw, The Rodeos had to call the Hands in to help with the clean-up operation. There were dead biker body parts to clear, burnt stable remnants that needed taking down and crispy fried horse carcasses that needed burying. It was the burying of the horses that Reuben and Effie decided to do themselves. The horses were important to them and a decent burial in the land is what they deserved.
Effie’s attention turned towards movement in the sky. An orange flash came into land in their ranch, just in front of the pair.
It was Holt. “Hey you two,” he cheerfully said, surveying the scene around him of the horse graves and the burnt out stables. “What happened here?”
“What do you wan’?” Effie asked, stopping and stabbing her shovel into the ground.
“Are you two ok?” Holt asked, not really hearing her. “I just came by to apologise for what happened in Far Rompton. Obviously I was doing what I was told to and it was the right decision to do that, because you got a little scary in the eyes, but Effie, I didn’t want you to feel like we couldn’t work together. And Reuben, I’m sorry for leaving you out in the desert. And fucking hell, how did your horses die to look like that?”
Effie wiped the sweat from her brow. “Look, it’s alright space boy. I was pissed at first, but we get it. I get it. We’re not massive team players. It just gets messy out there, and you taking us out of the fight like that is the kinda thing we’ve been dealing with in the past.”
“But thanks for coming by. And we’re all good here, thanks. Nothin’ we can’t handle ourselves,” said Reuben.
“Looking around,” Holt said, nodding in approval, “it certainly looks like that way.”
Reuben and Effie looked at each other. “Hell yeah,” Reuben said. “That's coz we’re The motherfuckin’ Rodeos.”