Ava looked very concerned when she opened the door to her room. “Leon? It’s… rather late. How can I help you? Are you alright?”

I realized I had probably knocked on her door a bit too enthusiastically and should perhaps stop smiling for the news I was about to deliver. “I’m great; Rufais is putting me on the front lines at dawn. Do you mind if I come in for a second?”

Ava looked stunned as she did indeed open the door a bit to allow me into her room.

It was nice, mostly neat and clean, although her work clothes from the day were tossed carelessly over a chair in the corner. There was a book propped open on her bedside table, which made me smile.

She tugged the robe that she was wearing a little closer over what seemed to be a fairly insubstantial nightgown, from what little I could see of it, and looked up at me with confusion in her eyes. “Aren’t you normally on the front line?”

“Yeah, but I usually have an army behind me.” I was smiling again. She was going to think I was crazy; I should probably stop that.

It took her a moment to process what I was saying, and I didn’t blame her in the slightest. “Wait, you– he’s sending you alone? How many troops are– we haven’t even entered another Skirmish!”

“He’s having the Aeron Ambassador executed in the morning, and I expect the troops are probably already on the move since their failed assassination of Rufais. I’ll be sitting out there waiting for them in the meanwhile.”

“He’s sending you alone?!?” She was almost screeching. I’d never heard her so loud.

“With anyone who wants to come die with me,” I amended, “who isn’t part of the normal force, obviously. Can’t deplete his actual army on a suicide mission.” I almost started laughing.

“You can’t go. Leon, you cannot go, that’s insane!”

“If I don’t, he’s going to hunt down and kill the Turyn who fled this morning,” I said, sobering up very quickly for that statement before grinning again. “Besides, doesn’t it sound like fun? It sounds like fun.”

Ava was looking at me with growing levels of horror, and I took a breath and tried to appear slightly less insane.

“I’m going to come back.”

“Not if you go!”

“Ava,” I snapped, and she jolted at my tone, but she actually looked at me instead of staring into the distance in existential horror. “I am going to go. And I am going to come back. I need you to believe that.”

“You can’t promise–”

“I can and I am,” I said, quiet but firm, “and I need you to believe me. If you will wait, I will come back. Whether they say I’m dead or whether I walk back through those gates, if Rufais throws me in the dungeons and has me publicly beheaded or says as much, I need you to believe me, right now. I will come back for you if you wait.”

She looked away, looked down at the ground, and I tilted and ducked my head, trying to catch her gaze again.

“Ava?”

“How am I supposed to believe that?” she whispered at the ground.

“Because I’ve never lied to you. I’ve never lied to you, I wouldn’t ever lie to you. Ava, if I thought there was even the slightest chance I would end up dead, I would tell you to give me a certain amount of time, if I asked for anything. There is no chance. I am coming back, I will come back. I just need you to believe me.”

“You’re asking for a lot,” she said, looking up and searching my eyes. “For me to believe you, over my own ears, over my own mind.”

I shrugged a bit helplessly. “Sometimes that’s what faith is.”

“You’re not a god.”

“No, those can die.”

Ava gave me a look that told me my snark wasn’t appreciated, and I chuckled briefly.

Then I waited.

She took a deep breath and let it out in a huff. “I can’t promise you forever.”

“Well, someday that’d be the goal, but I get that,” I smiled.

Ava scoffed, but I finally prompted a smile from her. “I will give you a month from the end of the battle.”

“Done.”

“You’re going to die,” she said, very quiet, tears filling her eyes.

I exhaled heavily and then reached out and pulled her into a hug. “I’m really not.”

She breathed a watery laugh and hugged me, hiding her head in my chest.

We stood there for a moment, and then she pulled back, taking a deep breath. “We don’t even know one another that well,” she murmured, wiping tears from her eyes.

“I think we know one another pretty well,” I said with a smile, brushing her hair back from her face. “But if you give me that month, I promise we’ll have more time to get to know each other better.”

“You better,” she whispered.

I glanced out the window, noting the continuing on of the night. Time didn’t like to stop to allow me to convince people I wasn’t lying, unfortunately. “I have to go; have a few more stops to make. I will come back.”

“Goodbye, Leon.”

I scowled at the finality. “I’ll see you later,” I promised her again and then left her room, closing the door behind me.

Now, where would my team be at this hour of the night? I almost snorted at myself for bothering to ask the question. Obviously, they would still be at a bar.

It took me three tries, looking at their different favorite places, to find them, but there they were– basically the only ones in the establishment, which was likely why it had been chosen, sitting at the bar. It was only Jair, Tola, and Jehu, but I hadn’t expected to find the others here.

“Captain,” Jehu greeted me as I took a seat next to him.

“You hear the news?”

“That Rufais is trying to have you executed by army? We did. Ehud dropped by and told us.”

“But he didn’t stick around to talk to me?” I put a hand to my chest as though wounded.

“I’m sure he’ll find you later,” Jehu muttered, downing his shot. “You here to tell us we don’t have to die with you again or whatever? Cause honestly, I’m more tempted to take you up on it this time around. This is really suicide.”

“And I fully understand if you sit it out. I’m not going to die though.”

All three of them turned to give me dubious looks.

“What magic trick are you going to pull out of your hat to manage that one, boss?” Jair drawled.

I shrugged. “Not actually sure yet. I’m supposed to be out there at dawn, and there’s no way the army will be there and ready to engage until the next day.” I was pretty confident in that, even if it were possible I could be proven wrong.

Tola snorted loudly. “I’m not afraid of Rufais. I’m plenty afraid of being ripped apart by a few thousand laser blasts. Count me out.”

“If you want to still travel out to the field with me and then run to give you a head start, I completely understand and would be happy to provide,” I said without hesitation, and then held out my hand. “It was good to serve with you.”

Tola looked taken aback, and I felt like maybe I had finally won some points of respect with the older man as he took it. “I never liked you much.”

“I could tell,” I said wryly.

“But you were a good Captain. It was good to serve with you. I may take you up on that offer yet, though it won’t be at dawn.” He laughed and finished the rest of his alcohol before pouring himself more.

“You’re really just going to let us duck out?” Jehu asked.

I blinked at him. “Of course. What else would I be doing?”

“I don’t know. Killing us out of revenge for betrayal or something.”

I looked at him quite dully. “You didn’t like me either, I see?”

Jehu snorted. “Nah, just never figured any way out of this mess would be so easy.”

“You fought with me for a year and a half,” I pointed out. “I’m not sure that would be considered easy.”

Jehu shrugged and sipped his own drink. “It was different than other fighting.” He looked me in the eyes. “Never had to worry about if you’d have my back.”

I inclined my head, and it was quiet for a moment.

“Well, I don’t have any touching words for you,” Jair announced, finishing her own drink, “‘cept that I hope you had fun with your pretty lady while you had the chance.” She smirked at me, but only for a moment. “Sorry you’re gonna be dead. I’ll pour a drink out for you, but I’m not dying with you. And I appreciate the offer to ride out and then off, but I’ve got my own way out. Don’t spend your last moments worrying about us– you should be thinking about using the chance to run off yourself.”

“Appreciate the thought, but I won’t be doing that,” I said evenly. “It was good to serve with you, Jair.”

“It was good to fight with you,” she returned and raised her glass. “Can’t say I’ll miss you, but I’ll think of you on occasion.”

“I’m really not going to die,” I said wryly, “but thanks.”

“Can you promise me I won’t?” Jehu asked, turning to look at me with that piercing look of his again. “If I come with you?”

This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.

I thought about it for a moment and then shook my head. “No.” I paused for a moment as Jehu turned back to the bar. “Would you believe me if I did?”

“I’ve made bets on worse.”

I smiled and then patted him on the shoulder. “Get out of the city. It was good to serve with you,” I echoed my own words, holding out my hand to him as well.

Jehu was silent for a long moment before he nodded and took my hand. “It was a real pleasure, Captain. If–” He stopped, caught himself, smiled with just a hint of strain. “When you make it, you should come say ‘hi’ sometime. I’ll probably be in the city for another week.”

“I really wouldn’t push it with Rufais,” I warned.

“He’s going to have bigger problems than me,” Jehu said with a short, dismissive wave and then promised, “I’ll keep my head down.”

I accepted that as good enough and then slid off the barstool, glancing over the three of them again. “May the Raven watch and guide you,” I said, even though I knew they probably wouldn’t care or appreciate the sentiment much.

To my slight surprise, not one of them made a joke. They were really all sure I was going to die. I felt laughter rising in my chest again and did my best to quash it.

“I’ll see you, Captain,” Jehu told me instead, and, well, at least he had some faith.

“Take as many of the bastards with you as you can,” Tola told me.

“And have fun doing it!” Jair added, raising her glass.

I nodded to them all and took my leave. I didn’t look back once, though I took a very deep breath when I got outside. I hadn’t expected them to come with me. Part of me was glad they weren’t.

“They all said their goodbyes?”

I turned and found Ehud stepping out of the shadows between the buildings onto the street next to me. “You could have just waited inside with them.”

“There was something I needed to do,” he said, enigmatic as always. “You refuse to run?”

“Don’t you know why?”

“Rufais threatened the Turyn who were fleeing on foot to meet up with the caravan that left in the middle of the night to get out of Ildanach as fast as possible?” Ehud smiled at me sadly. “They saw it coming. Turyn have a better ear to the ground than I do sometimes.”

“We have to.” I paused. “I didn’t see it coming. Not this.”

“I’m sorry.”

I simply stood there for a moment. “I’m not going to die, Ehud.”

“If anyone could pull it off, it’s you,” Ehud said, but I could see he didn’t believe me either. I didn’t blame him, not exactly, but when had I ever been falsely optimistic?

“Are you getting out of the city right away?”

Ehud shook his head. “I think I’ll wait and see how it shakes out. Besides, I’ll want to greet you if you do make it back.”

“Will you do me a favor, then?” I waited for him to look at me expectantly and then continued, “Hector is going to try to follow me. Don’t let him.”

Ehud blinked. “I thought you were welcoming all help due to your–”

“I’ll survive; I can’t not, Ehud. There are other factors at play here,” I said, skirting far too close to the real truth than I had originally meant, sudden earnestness in my voice that I hadn’t put there intentionally. “But he doesn’t have that guarantee. None of you would, and that’s why I’m not asking. I don’t have to worry about the rest of you trying it; you’re not suicidal. But Hector–”

“He’s not suicidal either,” Ehud pointed out quietly.

“If he doesn’t try it, then you don’t have to do anything, but if I’m right–”

“You misunderstand,” Ehud said quietly, cutting off my increasingly desperate pleas. I knew I was right. I knew someone needed to stop him, and I didn’t know who else would. “I know he’ll try to follow you, but it’s not cause he’s suicidal. It’s because you’re his brother.”

I looked down for a long moment and then looked him directly in the eyes. “And he’s mine. I can’t watch him die.”

Ehud nodded once. “I’ll make sure he stays put.”

And I knew I could believe him. I took a deep breath and let it out all at once, feeling a weight go with it. “Thank you.”

“It was an honor and a pleasure to serve with you, Leon.”

I blinked, looking at him in surprise as he beat me to the words, hand already outstretched. “It was good to know you, Ehud.” I took his hand, and he pulled me into a short embrace before releasing me.

“I look forward to seeing the miracle you pull off.”

“Yeah, me too,” I said with a short, wry laugh. “I’ll see you, Ehud.”

“Good luck, Captain.”

“Oh, and tell Hector….” I stopped and smiled, shaking my head. “Tell him he gets a free swing when I get back.” I walked away, again, without looking back.

I had one more big stop to make, since I couldn’t risk saying my goodbyes to Hector. He needed to not know until the last minute, and he was generally oblivious enough of the news and gossip that I was pretty sure he wouldn’t. I couldn’t go say goodbye then, but I was coming back regardless. As I’d said, he could take a free shot at me. But that still left one more goodbye.

The barracks were quiet, as it was getting later into the night. They weren’t particularly full during peacetime regardless, but now it was so silent it was almost eerie. I bypassed all of the normal cabins and headed to the stalls, where the skiffs were parked. As expected, there she was, my second in command, triple checking our stock and making sure we had everything we needed for the next fight, whenever it was announced. Her gloves were even on her hands, quietly humming.

“We headed out soon, Captain?” she asked me without turning.

“Have you heard the news?” I leaned casually against the doorframe.

“The news?” She turned partially towards me, the moonlight casting strange shadows over her face. “Oh, you mean the order to send you to your death. Yeah, I’ve heard that news.”

“Ehud?”

“My own ears. I’m in the barracks, Captain.”

She made a good point; everyone here had probably both heard and continued talking about it. “I’m here to say goodbye.”

“Because you’re going to take this skiff and disappear in the night? Sounds like a good plan, and I wish you well.”

“You know that’s not what I’m saying, Will.”

“It should be. He’s insane, and you don’t need to die for him.”

“I wouldn’t die for him. Not in a million years. And I’m not going to die.”

“It’s going to be two armies, Leon. Two full armies, maybe even with actual Church backing. You run or you die; those are the options!”

“I wish I could give you my title.”

Will stared at me. “What?”

“Captain. You’d make a better one than me.”

“Captain–” she began.

“Really. I hope when you get out of the city and move on, you consider it. Some kind of military role. You’re so much more than a pilot.”

“This isn’t– why are we talking about–”

“Because I’d hoped to leave you the team, someday,” I fully admitted. “Or at least a team. But obviously Rufais isn’t going to be doing me any favors any time soon.”

“I never would have gotten a team. I’m a criminal.”

“You know, I never asked any of you why you were in jail. A few people have just told me, I guessed a couple, but I’ve never asked. Considering I may never see you again after tonight– if you’re smart, and get out of the city– I hope you’ll forgive me. I never could even begin to guess why you were there.”

“I always assumed you knew before you offered us the jobs.”

I shook my head. “That wasn’t the part that mattered. I just knew you had terminal sentences.”

“Stealing.” Will sighed. “From my step-mother.”

“And she had you on the execution block?”

“She didn’t like me very much; got the charges trumped up. The feeling was mutual.” Will paused. “My father was a soldier, though. Died when I was young, though not before he’d had the chance to remarry. He told me he did it for me, wanted me to have a woman in my life, wanted someone besides his gruff brothers to take care of me if something should have happened.” Will sighed heavily. “My mother named me Willow, and he always called me by the full name. I think he wanted me to be more like her.”

“What did you want?”

“To be like him. A soldier. Didn’t expect to get there from prison. But then,” she met my eyes, “I wouldn’t make it very far in the traditional pathway, would I?”

“Enhancement armor levels the playing field a significant amount,” I said instead of answering.

“I wouldn’t get enhancement armor as a regular foot soldier. They’d let me in if I asked enough times, but I’d be dead immediately.”

“Probably. Doesn’t make you any less good at this.”

Will looked down. “I wanted so much to be like him, I think sometimes I should maybe have listened a little more to what he was trying to tell me that I should be.” She looked at me again. “You’re going to go die, aren’t you?”

“I’m not going to die.”

She rolled her eyes. “But you’ll go fight.”

“Yes.”

“Anyone going with you?”

“No, and you shouldn’t either.”

She looked down. “I don’t think I would anyway, Captain. I don’t think I could make myself do that. Not brave enough, I suppose.”

“Not stupid enough,” I corrected with a slight grin. “No one offered.”

“Hector?”

“I didn’t ask and I’m not going to.”

She breathed a laugh. “You asked me why I was in jail. Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“Why are you running?”

I started at her dumbfoundedly, somehow never having seen that coming.

Will expounded, “You’re obviously from the West, and you and Hector got here around the same time, presumably from the West, even if he’s got a Northern name. He trusts you so much, has never once doubted your word. You tell me you’ll survive, and I think you’re being brave, but he’d believe you in a heartbeat. So far he’s always been right, so maybe we’re the fools. He seems willing to settle down here, call it home, and I can see you like it here. But you’re always talking about when you’ll leave, move on. Thinking about trying to get me a title when you go. Why are you running?”

I looked down and thought for a long moment, thought about how much information, the right words, to give away only what I wanted and nothing more. I felt like she deserved some kind of answer though, after everything. Maybe they all did. “There was this man that I knew in the West. He taught me a lot of what I know, a lot of what makes me so good at what I do. But we had a disagreement when we went our separate ways, and… he wasn’t content with the resolution. I think any future confrontation between us would come to violence, and I’m trying to avoid that.”

“You think he would follow you all the way here?”

“He’s a very persistent individual.”

“It sounds like you were friends. Why the falling out?”

I had to smother a deeply inappropriate laugh, hearing the discharge of a laser pistol in my mind. “It was also an employment arrangement, and I decided I wanted to move on. He wasn’t happy, and I wasn’t very kind about how I offered my resignation. Sometimes things just go sideways.” I shrugged.

Will hummed and graciously allowed it to drop, giving me a deep sense of relief. “When are you leaving?”

I glanced at the sky. “Probably fairly soon. You were my last stop.”

“You’re not seeing Hector?”

“It wouldn’t go well. I asked Ehud to stop him from following me and give him a message. It’ll be fine, though, cause I’ll be back and he can punch me a couple of times.”

Will breathed a faint chuckle. “I’ve never wanted to believe a lie so much.”

“It’s not a lie, but I understand. Hey, do you need a way out of the city? You probably shouldn’t stick–”

“I’ll leave when the others do.”

“It sounds like Jair has her own way out and will be booking it any time now, so I wouldn’t wait around.”

Will gave me an odd look. “Do you really think that?”

I arched an eyebrow. “Why shouldn’t I?”

“Captain, we all want to believe you’re coming back. No one’s leaving the city until we see an army, your corpse, or you walking back through those gates. We won’t wait long enough to die, but we’re not just going to run off. I don’t need to talk to Jair to know that.”

I opened my mouth and then closed it again, honestly touched. “It’s probably not smart to do that. You should all get out.”

“Too bad. What are you gonna do about it?”

I smiled, genuinely. “Cite you all for insubordination when I get back.”

Will laughed. “Sounds good. I look forward to it, Captain.”

“It was an honor to serve with you, Will.”

“You too.” She hesitated and then walked over and gave me a hug, which I readily returned. “Don’t forget to yell at us when you get back.”

“I won’t,” I promised, patted her on the back, and then headed out into the night again.