CHAPTER 5

THE FIFTH ENTRY IN THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF MASON COURBIS

"Too Cliché for Our Own Good"

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  "This set of mithril full-plate armor was once worn by the holy warrior Mikkhail Kastrenphir, the divine champion of Aggras, Guardian of Light and Life. Inscribed upon it are various enchantments, including strength-enhancement, speed-enhancement, fire-absorbing, ice-resistance, self-repairing, regeneration, and several others."

  I was staring at a rather huge, if not fuckmassive set of mythical plate armor. The pauldrons themselves were larger than my chest; it looked as though it might be a bit big on a space marine, let alone a normal human being. I tried to keep a frown from forming upon my lips, but as that proved difficult, I raised my hand up to cover my mouth somewhat. At least in this way, I could mask my expression as seeming thoughtful. The person speaking, by the way, was named Soras. He was a gray-skinned fiendish butler; he was one of many butlers belonging to Outcast House Xirai'Kuur.

  "The set itself has a natural ambient glow to it, allowing it to work well in low light. However, if you were to strike the chest here..." Emblazoned upon the center of the armor's chestplate was a large, garish, sun-shaped emblem. Soras paused for a moment, raised up a fist, then moved to pound it against the core of the sun. Immediately upon contact, the symbol lit up, and the core began to shine brighter than a squad car's floodlights. Or, I suppose, at a brightness comparable to the sun itself. "... The sun will become a beacon of light, allowing you to see into the darkness, or show yourself to others."

  I stared on as this set of armor had been turned into a veritable lighthouse. It was certainly tall enough to make the cut. Perhaps my silence was a bit too telling, however, as Soras began to perspire just slightly, and tugged at the collar of his fine suit.

  "... Ahem. Moving on." He struck the armor's chestplate once more, and the sun ceased shining. He then moved across the showroom floor towards a small stand bearing a leather case. "This, however, I am sure you will wish to see. Behold... the Blade of Starfall." Soras undid the clasps upon the case, and pulled the lid open from behind. As it was pulled back, the weapon within was revealed to be a rather large-looking longsword of interesting design, and made of a unique-looking material. It boasted a brilliant shine, and the surface of the blade changed colors if one were to look at it from different angles. It generally held a somewhat red-ish blue-ish hue, and I could feel a bit of heat emanating from the opened box despite standing at least a good fifteen feet away from it.

  "... Forged long ago across the seas in the old dwarven kingdom of Yuul'Kragh by master bladesmiths. It is said to have been forged of a material retrieved from a meteorite that fell as a blessing of Silestra, Goddess of Endless Wisdom, and Tempered Judgement through Knowledge." Soras reached over the lid of the box in order to lift the blade from its case; it clearly seemed needlessly heavy, which was perhaps the result of being forged out of an incredibly dense material that fell from outer space. "The blade has been fitted with a dark crescent-moon handguard, which boasts countless tiny glittering white gemstones in an attempt to paint an image of the night sky; this is to remind the wielder of the endless number of stars above us, which is symbolic for the limitless choices we all may face. The blade itself is rather heavy; each time it is swung, its weight causes the wielder to reflect on the training they underwent in order to master the weapon, and the implications such an act brings."

  I nodded several times as Soras went on. There seemed to be a lot more flavor text for this heavy, ugly-looking blade than there was for the huge, ugly-looking paladin’s armor they had acquired.

  "However," said Soras, as he continued to drag on. "When it is swung, the Blade of Starfall is said to strike its target with all the force of a searing-hot meteor as it burns across the night sky. One could say that the blade is, essentially, still a shooting star."

  "Indeed," I said, through the fingers of my hand. I was still covering my mouth just slightly as I assessed the situation. I couldn't stop myself from letting out a soft sigh. "Everything seems par for the course, really. Reincarnated into a fantasy world. Given a strong body with a good aptitude for magic. Offered rare, exotic gear fit for a hero. Sent off to slay the demon king."

  I lifted up my other hand and looked down at it. I concentrated for a moment, and was able to focus my intent into the shape of a flame within my palm. Energy crackled around my fingers as a magical fire leapt into existence upon the surface of my hand. Everyone around me seemed shocked and I heard quite a few audible gasps from the various servants and staff nearby. After a moment, I allowed the energy keeping up the flames to disperse, causing them to die down, and then let my hand drop to rest under my other arm once more.

  "... I can use chantless magic naturally. Probably has something to do with being from Earth, or the descendant of some great Archmage or whatever." I furrowed my brows at that and looked up to Soras, then to Serin, who was standing nearby. She had her brows raised and her mouth was slightly agape from my small performance, but she quickly regained her composure as she looked at me expectantly. I let my hand fall from my mouth, revealing my frown, and placed it upon my hip instead. "... What's next‒ am I going to have a party full of various capable, yet quirky, adventurers to help me?

  Soras blinked for a moment and began to stammer. "A-ah, well... we had planned to requisition a party for you from a wide pool of candidates we put together some time ago, yes." At this, I let out another audible sigh.

  "... Isn't it all a bit too convenient?" I tipped my head to the side and shifted my weight from one foot to the other as I surveyed the room. "I understand you all must have prepared, perhaps even for quite some time. But are you really sure that this is the best way to defeat Xoul?" I gestured over towards the "heirloom" gear they had presented me with. "An overly heavy sword that can level castles in a couple of swings, and a set of armor that turns me into some sort of unkillable human torch?"

  Only Soras and Serin could understand what I was saying, but it was rather clear I sounded somewhat displeased. I didn't mean to be overly harsh, especially to the people who had technically saved my life, but I couldn't help but have some reservations. Serin brought a hand up to her chin and held it thoughtfully as Soras stuttered somewhat and attempted to formulate a response.

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  "W-well... yes! Outcast House Xirai'Kuur has been collecting artifacts and various magical items of this nature for generations in hopes that one day a descendant of the Great Archmage would defeat Xoul. He had given them the vial of his blood, preserved through time-dilation enchantments, and the knowledge of the ritual, saying that when a time of great need had arisen, to summon a descendant of his so that they may assist us. Outcast House Xirai'Kuur then began to gather legendary weapons and armor with which to outfit our savior, so that they would not be unequipped when the time came to confront Xoul. We... ah..."

  I nodded several times and raised a hand as Soras prepared to ramble on again. I didn't exactly feel like digesting any more bulk exposition in one sitting.

  "Right. And I believe that these artifacts may aid us in the war against Xoul, in a way. Though... I really don't think that having me use them is going to help."

  Soras looked nothing less than shocked to hear this. "Wh‒ I... I don't understand... The armor of Aggras' Champion should make you stronger than ten men, fast as the wind, and tougher to kill than a troll! The Blade of Starfall could easily obliterate a small squadron of Autarchy soldiers, or, as you said, take down the walls of a castle in but a few swings. Armed with these, you alone would rival a demi-god in terms of raw power! How would such things not help?"

  "Well," I say, as I begin to pace around the circular showroom floor, "there's a few reasons, really."

  As I walk, my eyes shift to the various servants and staff within the room; the room itself was a tall circular ballroom-like space with halls that led into it both from the North and South. The highest part of the ceiling was full stained glass, and the Eastern and Western walls were lined with tall beautiful windows. All of the curtains had been drawn, making the only source of natural light the ceiling above. Standing around the area were various servants and attendants. Some of them were responsible for transporting the extremely heavy set of armor into the room, while others appeared to be present for the purpose of keeping watch at the windows and hallways. Others seemed to simply be observing, and were serving no other purpose at the time. Of what I could see, a great many of the servants within the room seemed to be the same species as Soras and Serin, a species which translates into the common tongue as "Fiend." There were various butler-esque servants standing about wearing sharp-looking suits and fine gloves, as well as a few maid-esque servants who boasted fine, but functional dresses, aprons, and, of course, gloves. A small sect of servants caught my eye, however; some servants seemed to be wearing robes, and a couple appeared to be carrying tomes. I assumed that these were either religious vestments, or the dressings of a mage. A few stood together near the Eastern windows, muttering to each other in a low tone of voice. Another, however, stood close to Serin, and seemed to be acting as her attendant. He stood slightly hunched over with his arms folded over his chest. His face betrayed no emotion, but I could tell that his eyes were following me. I simply ignored it for the time being.

  "... First of all. You are correct, Soras, in that these items would make me incredibly powerful. And even then, among other capable heroes, we would no doubt become a force to be reckoned with." I let out a sigh as I continued to casually pace around the room. "... The problem arises when Xoul simply decides to, then, reckon with us.

  "The armor would stop almost all incoming injuries while equipped, and the sword would dispatch any threat when one wields it... but one cannot constantly do such things. Using items like these will make me a huge target‒ not just to Xoul, but to everyone. I'll have to sleep at some point; thieves will try to take the gear, and assassins will attempt to take my life. Perhaps my new adventurer allies could assist me, granted they don't betray me for whatever reason.

  "Even then, however, it still begs the question." I pause at this, and turn back towards Soras with a serious expression. "... Do you truly believe that even with all of these things, I can somehow kill Xoul himself? Even with a capable party of heroes, what are the odds?"

  Soras blinked at that, and swallowed hard. He was sweating quite badly now, and he reached up to rub at the back of his neck quite anxiously. "... I... I don't know. Truthfully speaking... I do not believe it would be possible, no. B-but, that's-" I quickly held up a hand to stop him again.

  "I would use the gear to take down his strongholds and fortresses, yes? To acquire magical artifacts from his generals and subordinates. Or I would venture around the continent in search of old dungeons, and brave them in order to uncover relics lost to the ages." I just grimace at that and shake my head as I begin pacing around the room once more. "... I don't believe that reality would truly pan out that way. This Xoul is the leader of an entire nation of people, who's brought his army here from another plane of existence with the intention of conquering this entire planet. If some kind of threat arises that can shake up his operation, what would stop someone like him from personally making a visit to squash it like a bug? Is he really that vain? Does he think he's above that kind of thing?"

  I paused again, and turned to Serin. I had walked the full perimeter of the room and found myself beside her and her robed attendant. I could feel something coming from him, but I couldn't quite tell what. It was a familiar feeling, and one I had felt many times on Earth. I had felt it just recently, actually, at the place I had visited before I died. When I had sat down at the table to have my "fortune" read, I could sense something. It felt like some kind of magnetic tension, or perhaps it was a feeling based on the way the air itself moved, but I knew that the "crystal ball" before me was indeed a magical artifact. Back to the present, I had felt it as well just moments ago when I had neared the powerful artifacts which sat at the center of this very room. And now, as I stood perhaps ten feet away from this robed figure, I could feel that sensation emanating from somewhere within his robes. I just couldn't tell what was causing it... though I had a feeling that I might be able to find out. I began to focus a bit of energy once more, and pooled it remotely. I allowed it to collect at the source of the sensation that came from the man's robes, and essentially tried to create a mesh around the object in order to discern its shape. I'm not really sure if that, being from Earth, my knowledge of concepts like, "The Force," or, "Focusing one's Chi," or, "a Three-Dimensional Mesh," helped me in my ability to control the surplus of mana that exists in this world, but as I continued to manipulate a thin field of energy around this hidden object, I found that the practice came to me a little too easily. Rather quickly, I discovered the true shape of the object.

  I did my best to keep from looking at the attendant; I didn't want him to know that he had caught my attention. I kept looking to Serin, expectantly, as if I thought she would answer my question. In the end, with a crestfallen expression, she shook her head slowly. Soras let his head fall a bit, and stared at the floor. There was a moment of silence within the room as we all contemplated the points I had presented. Eventually, however, it was broken when Serin spoke up.

  "... Well. With all of that in mind, do you have an alternative to propose?"

  It only took one sentence for me to smile once more. As Serin finished speaking, a grin sprang to my lips and I nodded once. I squared my shoulders, took a few steps forward, and offered out my hand for Serin to take. She blinked a couple of times before tentatively accepting it.

  "Surely," I said, as I lifted Serin's hand into the air and began to spin her, as if we were dancing the Tango. She, along with all in attendance, were shocked and surprised as I span, dipped, and deposited Serin into a position that interposed myself between her and her attendant. I offered her a single wink.

  "I believe our operation would go much more smoothly if I were armed with the simple knife your attendant seems to be hiding within his robes."

It was at this exact moment that all hell broke loose.