**Hello, is anyone there, where is everyone, can somebody hear me, please answer, I don't want to be alone anymore. I'm tired, so tired, I want to scream, so loud, until someone notices me, but I have no strength... Why am I like this, haven't I been through enough, when is this going to end, make it stop, I can't bear this anymore, it's never going to get any better. I want to cry so bad, why can't I cry, COME ON, JUST CRY, LET IT OUT, WHERE ARE MY TEARS, DID YOU TAKE THEM, WHO TOOK THEM.

I would say I'm losing my mind but I feel like I have lost it a long time ago, it hurts so bad, why can't anybody see that I'm in pain, no one cares, why does no one care, say something, JUST SAY SOMETHING.

I'm so lost, I don't know what to do, I don't know where to go, what is happening to me, why am I so miserable, I beg, make it stop, I will do anything, how much can one person take, this isn't fair, no one deserves to feel like this.

Maybe I should just go to sleep, that usually helps, what if I can't sleep, I will end up just laying down there in bed, I don't want to be with my thoughts anymore, please turn them off, I just want to sleep, I want to see a happy dream, It's been so long since I had one, all I keep seeing are nightmares, every night, what have I done, to deserve this.

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What if I just give up, that would be nice, but I can't just let them win, there is no way, I'm not gonna let any loser think me defeated, I will keep going, I will keep fighting, I will not be silenced, no one will take advantage of me, ever, again.

This too will pass, just like the other times, right? Right... 

Things will get better... 

If I say it enough times I might just believe it...

I can't just take the easy way out...

I want to be alone, but I don't want to feel lonely, how does one do that, do you know? Can you tell me?

What if no one can do that, why are humans like this, why do I want to be alone, am I that broken, can I be fixed, who can fix me, can you?..

So many thoughts, so many feelings, they are all mine hahah, you can't have them, they are mine, all mine... the one thing I truly own... feels kind of nice.

When I find my place in this world, I will be happy, someday, I just have to keep looking, do I belong here, or there, or maybe there, so many options, I'm sure my place is waiting for me, does it also feel lonely, I wonder, don't worry place, I will find you, and we will be together forever.

It's getting late.

I have to sleep. 

And when I wake up I will feel all better!

I'm so excited.

Lalala tomorrow I will feel better, I bet you are jealous, you should be.

Anyway.

Goodnight.