It hasn't always been a shitty for me. I remember times where I actually smiled and laughed. Times where I loved and felt loved. Unfortunately the universe had other plans for me, plans that would shatter the very core of my existence. It starts back to just a year ago. "Why don't you and your lovely wife come over for dinner tonight, we haven't seen you in so long plus we miss the kids". A woman says over the phone. "Mom, I told you we would be over this weekend, I promised you and dad I would show up". I look over my shoulder and see myself in the reflection of the mirror beside me. I look tired, scruffy black hair and a beard that needs to be shaved. The bags under my eyes are atrocious and the decolorization in my face, I seen better days. "After work on Friday I will be over with everyone". We speak for a few more minutes and we hang up after exchanging a few "I know", "Ok" and ending with " I love you". After the call I get up to grab a cup of coffee. As I walk to the kitchen I hear a whisper from behind me. I stop and turn my head slowly. I see nothing and think nothing of it, only to turn around and my wife is standing in front of me with a demon mask on. "AHHH" I yell out uncontrollably. Seconds after I feel 2 separate weights on my back as i fall to the floor I notice my kids laughing and yelling inches away from my ear. You all must think this is so funny"! I yell out. All of their faces changed from smiles to frowns. " i bet it won't be funny when I grab you and tickle you"! Everyone laughs and runs away leaving me alone with my wife. My wife staring at me with her honey brown eyes. She has red hair and is half my height. I'm 5'10 and she's 5'3. "What were you going to do"? she askes me in a playful tone. " I was just about to grab me a cup of coffee" I tell her as I lean in for a kiss. As our lips meet we are met with a series of "ewes" from our children. " I have to get ready for work" i tell my wife as I make silly faces to my children. I head upstairs and start to get dressed for my day. I do nothing special for work. I work as a lawyer at a subpar law firm, barely in the running for partner and I hate every single individual i work with. I don't even put the bad guys away, I defend them and try my best to get them off. Honestly, most of the time they deserve prison and I hate myself for defending them sometimes. "Heading out" I yell out to my wife as she runs down the hallway to give me a kiss. " Have a good day at work and hurry and go before the kids see you and cry for you to stay". I leave and rush out in a hurry. Honestly, the drive is possibly the worst the part. Traffic, people who don't have road manners and assholes all the way around. The next few hours of work are honestly the worse. As I sit in my office I am greeted with the worse news I can get. My wife calls me and in a panic. I answer and "Hello"? My wife starts to speak but cant get a word out. You can hear she is crying on the other line. She tried to get words out but I cant understand her as she sounds like she is grasping for air. in between breaths she I make out what no one would want to hear. "Your parents died". My mouth falls open and everything around me starts to feel like its spinning. I cant feel my body, I feel numb as a rush of cold goes all over my body. I ask my wife to repeat her self. "Your parents died" she says in a calmer tone. "They died on the way to the supermarket. A car came out of no where and smashed into them as they were walking across the street. They died on impact". My eyes start to tear up as I stand up from my chair. " They say it was a hit and run. Your sister tried to get a hold of you but your phone was busy. I'm so sorry". I grab my keys and I run out of the office. I try to find my higher up to explain the situation, and to my luck he is nowhere in sight. I rush and ask his secretary and she tells me he went out for lunch and should be back any minute. I sigh in frustration and as I turn around and see my boss walking back in. "John"! I yell out. I explain the situation and he rushed me out the office. I put the keys in the ignition and race out of there. "That was 10 minutes wasted" I think to myself. I race down the road and on to the highway. Driving as if I am a race car driver. I drive to the next exit only to be met with standstill traffic. I angrily yell in my car as tears fall from my face. After about 15 minutes in traffic, I finally make it off the highway. As I sit in the car at a red light waiting for it to turn green, I remember the conversation I had with my mom, wishing I would've called out of work and went over her house instead, I let out a scream of pure pain and anguish. Tears start to fall out of my eyes as the light changes and I race home. The only thing I can think of is maybe this is all a lie, a game. I start to call my mom and my dad and I get nothing. I keep trying all the way home. I reach home only to be met with police and yellow tape in front of my home. My mind is scrambled as i ask what is going on. The officer ask me who I am. "I'm Derek Hopkins and this is my home, My wife and kids are in there"! The officer hold me back and tells me not to go. He grabs me only to tell me my wife and kids have been murdered. I drop to my knees, shaken, my heart feels like its about to jump out of my chest. "What"? "This is a joke, YOU HAVE TO BE JOKING"! I yell out at the officer. "Is there anyone you can think of that would want to do this"? I cant even speak, I cant let a word out as I stare into space. "My life.... my whole life. Taken. Taken from me all in one day". I scream again, I scream so loud it feels like I'm going to rupture something. The day goes by and questions after questions from police officers continue. After a while they tell me to go home and we can try again tomorrow. I lay in bed holding the pillow next to me, keeping the toys extra close to me as I remember a client I had who I failed to get acquitted. "My boys are going to take everything from you". The voice rings in my head the voice sounded menacing, down right evil, playing in my head like a broken record. I jump out of bed to call the detective working on my case. "What good would that do, the guys already in prison for life and they aren't going to catch anyone". Instead I grab my keys and go to the nearest bar. I sit there for hours. Drinking. Drink after drink. "Hey buddy, you okay"? The bartender ask me. I tell him its nothing and I just had a long day today and I wish I can forget it. We talk for a while and he hands me some water. " I'll give you another drink when you drink that glass of water". I thank him and chug the water.  "LAST CALL" the bartender yells. I grab my things and walk out but before I do the bartender stops me. "Hey, before you go I want you to remember one thing. "He looks down and back at me again "Courage doesn't always roar, sometimes it's the quiet voice at the end of the day whispering I will try again tomorrow" He smiles at me. " I don't know what you're going through and I don't want to pretend I understand, all I know is that you should always make sure your feather weighs more than your heart". I walk over to him and hand him 100$. "Thank you" I tell him as I walk out. As I start walking the cool air from the night time hits my face. At this moment the liquor starts to hit me. Wobbling on the road, I can barely speak let alone walk. As I walk I turn the corner only to be met with a punch to the face. "What the fuck"! I exclaim. " You thought you were going to just get away with letting our fellow comrade rot in prison" a man says laughing between his words. I look around and see 6 people around, all of them surrounding me. " YOU had one job and you could barely do that". He smacks me across the face and seconds later I'm met with a barrage of punches and kicks. I'm thrown to the floor where I receive kicks to my face. I can feel the warm sensation of blood dripping down my face. My vision blurry from the constant kicks to my head. "Take this before we go"! I glance up to see the light of the street lamp above reflect off a knife as he rams it into my stomach. "1...2.....3...4... my mind draws a blank as he stands over me and through my blurry vision see him stab some more and suddenly I feel a relief. I feel waves of coolness rush through my body. Everyone around runs away and I look down only to see blood. A big pool of blood. "This is it, this is how I go"? I think to myself, unable to speak. "This is pathetic, but I can be with everyone again". A tear falls down my cheek. "I'm coming". I say as the breath from my mouth ceases. I suddenly awaken in a room. Everything is white, white as far as the eye can see. Suddenly I hear a voice. "Why so sad"? The voice ask. You lived a decent life, its sad where it ended and how it ended but you lived according to Gods plan". Suddenly a man appears. Tall with blonde hair and a sword to his right hip. He was dressed in a robe and sandals. He had a feminine face but masculine features. " You lived a decent life and you deserve a better end but unfortunately there isn't much I can do". Before I can get a word out he looks over his shoulder " I want to help you. I don't normally do this but here". He gives me a  feather and walks away. " What is your name"? I yell out to him as he leaves. He stops and looks back "Gabriel" he smirks and continues on his way until he vanishes. After he leaves my head feels dizzy and I fall asleep. When i woke up I found myself somewhere that was unfamiliar. I look to my left and I see him, I see Gabriel. He looks over at me and walk to me. "Don't move, please. You must have a lot of questions and I have answers. This place in which are in is the land of gods" he says as he opens his arms wide. "I take pity on you" he tells me. "Here you are neither alive nor dead. Neither Heaven nor Hell. in time you will realize why you are in these lands but for now get some rest. You will need it for the upcoming days". He smiles and walk away. My eyes start to get heavy. I Fight to keep them open but I'm utterly weak and I fall asleep.

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