Another Day in Hell

It was yet another day in Hell. The Hazbin Hotel was just as busy as always, aka, not at all, with Sir Pentious being the only new resident in quite a while. Angel Dust was harassing Husk as always, Charlie was telling Vaggie about her new idea for the 'Redemption Schedule', while Pentious was trying to stop Nifty from killing all of his Eggy Bois.

Alastor, while he did enjoy the chaos, was getting used to this life. The same grin still was wide on his face, permanently plastered on like it was almost real. But at that moment, it might as well have been. Whilst he was still yet to make any deal with Charlie, everything else in his little project was going wonderful. Anybody who tried to attack the hotel could be dealt with very easily, it hadn't got in the way of any of his other plans, and it was fairly entertaining to see the sinners fail to attempt or get any better substantially, at least most of the time.

However, he couldn't help but grow a little attached to all of them. He dared to call them his 'friends'. It did go against what he came here for, it even scared him a little bit, but he somehow felt even a little bit proud of Charlie and the slow but steady progress of the hotel's residents. He could get used to this, and he wouldn't complain. At least, not much.

He took out a cloth out of the left side of his 'Radio Red' coat. He polished his adored microphone / cane, making it shine more than the sun did on the day of a dreaded heatwave. Even if he was starting to faintly forget some part of his life he lost so long ago, he would never forget the rising sun of a new day gleaming into his room. He decided it might be a good idea to socialise with one of his 'friends' to distract himself before he got even somewhat sentimental or emotional, or even worse, start to have those sorts of memories.

He walked over to the ironically wholesome Princess of Hell and her very supportive yet aggressive girlfriend, leaning on the table with one hand as the other scribbled away like a child drawing something for their parents. "Good morning my chums!" He spoke, putting on his radio filter, as always. That was always his favourite way people heard him, both when he was alive and in death. "Oh, goood morning Alastor!" she sang excitedly. Vaggie, now barely able to tolerate Alastor, simply put up a peace sign to signal she knew he was there.

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"How are you on this fine day?" he asked. "Good! So, so so so so so so good!" Charlie said, without sparing even a second for breathing. "I just came up with a new plan for the hotel!" Intrigued by what sparkly nonsense she was inevitably about to splurt out, Alastor leaned his Radio Cane against the fancily decorated crimson wood table, putting his elbows onto it, both his hands supporting his chin.

"Today, I'm introducing all guests of this Hazbin Hotel to... REDEMPTION QUIZZES!!!" Charlie announced loudly, innocence and kindness flowing through her voice as she thrust multiple pieces of small papers in a pile in the air, keeping them neatly put together by clasping her hands around it. The following swears and slurs coming out of all the residents' mouths following the announcement were not so innocent and kind. "Really?! A goddamn test?! WE'RE ALREADY IN HELL YOU SICK MONSTER!!!" was the only thing that didn't contain a curse.

"Everyone, please, watch the language!" Alastor said playfully as he stood fully up. "Princess Morningstar here's idea is worth at least trying, and there's no use for such profanity!" he added. Everyone just groaned and rolled their eyes, before putting it behind them and resuming their normal routine. Charlie put her heels back down onto the floor, adorning a sweet and thankful grin that made Vaggie feel all warm inside, even if it wasn't directed at her in this situation... even if it was given to the Radio Demon.

"Awwww, thank you Alastor!" she thanked. "Oh, no problem at all my friend! I just believe these wayward sinners should truly appreciate you for your generosity in trying to save them from the depths of hellfire!" It was nice to hear someone saying she was a good person doing good things, even if it came from Alastor. But, just then, she had realised something. "Well, thanks! But... huh... I just realised, Alastor, you don't swear! Like, at all. Why is that?" she questioned, wondering why and just how he didn't use swears as a majority of their vocabulary in a place like Hell itself.

Even Charlie, one of the most wholesome and sweetest beings in Hell's history (which she had heard from many people, like her dad when she was a kid, and Vaggie, basically every night) still swore quite regularly! "Well my dear, it is simply because I am a gentleman!" He straightened up his fancy red bowtie. "I choose not to use such cruel and harsh words for it is uncalled for and sometimes, just straight up rude! I can't remember in the last near century where I've sworn, in fact, I wouldn't be surprised if I never swore again–!"

"ALASTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!" A loud, female voice screamed out, accompanied by the sound of a hole in the wall being formed, in the exact same spot as always, right next to the strangely-patched-into-the-building bar, where Husk and Angel had recoiled in shock a bit. Vaggie was already on edge, whilst Charlie looked at Alastor, his face exactly the same as before, yet somehow, looked ten times more tired.

"Fuck."