Prologue
A humanoid figure descended from the sky at an incredible speed, landing on the store behind me with such force that it caused an explosion. The impact sent me flying, and I crashed into a car. I lost consciousness immediately.
When I started to regain consciousness, my chest ached intensely. The pain was so severe that I struggled to breathe. I gasped for air, but nothing happened. Panic began to set in. Everything was pitch black; I couldn't tell if my eyes were closed or if I was dead. But when I realized that my thoughts were still functioning, despite not breathing, I had to conclude that I was indeed dead.
The darkness persisted. Was this the heaven everyone talks about? If it was, then I felt sorry for those who believed in it—no, this was more likely hell. After all, heaven is supposed to be for those who did good deeds while they were alive. As far as I could recall, I hadn't done a single good thing in my life, so this must be hell.
I chuckled dryly, though I couldn't hear any sound. Still, I knew I had laughed.
Time passed, though I couldn't gauge it. I had a sense that time was moving quickly. I found it curious that I remained sane under these circumstances—no light, only darkness; no sound, no one to talk to. I was floating in a sea of nothingness. Yet, amidst all of this, I wasn't suffering. Could this truly be hell? I doubted it. Hell was supposed to be a place where terrible people suffer, or so I had been told. But there was no suffering here. In fact, I was enjoying the peace and quiet. My only issue was that I couldn't see anything.
This feeling… was it déjà vu? Yes, I had been in a place like this before.
It happened many years ago, around eleven years back, when I was in elementary school. I was part of the football club. I wasn't one of the best players, but I wasn't the worst either—just average, really, showing up when they needed me most during matches.
During a regional tournament, I was benched in favor of another kid. I won't lie; he was better than me, not just in football but in everything—grades, looks, conversation, and even with girls. Yes, even at the age of eight, he was already popular with the girls. How did he manage to pull them bitches at that age? I guess I'll never know now that I'm dead. I didn't hate him; I bore no ill will towards him. But that didn't mean he felt the same about me. He despised me and, because of his influence, many others at school did too… but that's all in the past now.
Eventually, as the match progressed, I was substituted in as a midfielder. Towards the end of the game, things got intense. We were facing a goalless draw, which would have led to extra time. With our last chance to win, we all pushed into the opposition's half for a corner kick. The ball was crossed into the penalty box, heading towards me. I jumped high—pretty high for an elementary kid—but instead of heading the ball, I collided with that other kid, Kimoto or something was his name.
Both of us were taken out of the match and treated. Unlike him, who woke up a few minutes later, I slept for an entire week. When I finally woke up and returned to school, I was blamed for everything that happened.
Heh, my messed-up life didn't just start recently.
But during that week when I was unconscious, I was in this same kind of state—peaceful, tranquil, no light, just pitch darkness. I had thought I was dead back then, but I eventually woke up. So maybe this situation is similar, right? What if I wake up again in a day, a week, or maybe a month? Well, all these are just speculations.
I let out a sigh, though I still couldn't hear anything.
Elementary school, huh? That was one of the worst times of my life growing up, though it was child's play compared to what I faced in middle school. In middle school, one moment I vividly remember was when…
'Huh… what's this? Is this light? Yes, it is! I'm waking up! I'm alive—I'm alive!'
I celebrated in my head. Now that I think about it, this was the first time I was ever happy to be alive. If I ever get back, I'm definitely going to celebrate this moment.
The light finally broke through the darkness, but what I saw next devastated me. I wished I was still in that dark abyss.
I was truly dead.
I was sitting on the ground, my back resting against a car. I couldn't see my waist because a huge metal platform was crushing it. I tried to move, but no muscles in my body responded. I used my eyes, which were somehow still functioning, to scan the area.
There was debris everywhere—stones, wood, and metal. As I looked further, I saw, lying a few meters away from the metal, the other half of my body. My blood, already dried and blackened, trailed from it. This was only half of the horror I witnessed.
I looked up at the sky, but I couldn't see it. The entire sky was obscured by dark smoke. While staring upwards, I noticed something on top of my head—something like a little alien. It had no solid shape or form, but it was feeding off my brain, or at least that's the conclusion I reached since I couldn't get a clear view of it.
'Get off me, you fucking bastard!'
I tried to shout, but nothing happened. That's when I realized I had lost almost all my senses—smell, touch, and hearing. I couldn't do any of them; only my sight remained functional.
'So, I'm just going to let this freaking bastard feed off me, huh? Haha, my life really was a mess, even to the end.'
While I laid on the car looking at the dark sky I saw a helicopter hover passed me,
I was somewhat glad but also deeply pained. Glad that humanity was still alive, but pained that I had to die. Why? I asked, but no answer ever came.
****
My name is Tokita Ryuma, and I believe I have just made my first friend in my entire life.
***
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Another year has passed since I regained my sight. I'm quite certain of this because I have experienced two winter seasons since then.
Let me tell you about my friend. Meet B-three, the creature I once believed was eating my brain. Over the past year, I've been observing it, and I've discovered many intriguing and somewhat depressing things about it. In the process, we've even become friends, although I must admit that this friendship seems a bit one-sided.
First and foremost, B-three has no definite form. It's a black, slimy liquid that stretches out tentacles, using them to grab and hold objects. At first, I thought B-three was consuming my brain, but in reality, it was repairing me—bringing me back to life. I have absolutely no idea how it managed to do this, but I'm certain of one thing: B-three was the reason I regained my eyesight a year after the accident.
As months passed and I continued to watch B-three, another creature of its kind appeared. This one was red in color. I couldn't hear what they were saying, but it seemed like they were having some sort of disagreement. Without hesitation, B-three absorbed the red creature, and afterward, I noticed that some red hues began to appear within B-three. Apart from that, not much else happened. It felt like time was standing still as I watched B-three continue its work inside my head.
I spent months watching B-three at work, unable to sleep. My brain, not yet fully functioning, seemed incapable of rest. This left me wondering what was actually powering my mind. How could I be dead and still capable of thought? It didn't make any sense.
One day, B-three slowly crawled down from my open head. It used its tentacles to open my shirt and then pierced them into my heart. I couldn't feel what was happening in my body, but I had this instinctual feeling that it was grabbing hold of my heart. It was as if some deep-seated human instinct kicked in, despite the fact that I hadn't yet regained my sense of touch or feeling. I was more like a husk, unable to tell what was really going on.
Suddenly, my body jolted as if I'd been electrocuted. For a brief moment, I felt a spark flowing throughout my torso, and then it vanished. Once again, I couldn't feel a thing.
B-three climbed back to my head, continuing whatever it was doing up there, but some of its tentacles remained stuck in my chest.
'I'm just a lab rat now,' I thought, laughing dryly to myself. But I couldn't hear the laughter, nor did my mouth move. It was all happening inside my head.
Then, out of nowhere, I began to hear noises—loud noises. The clanging of metals, the sound of wood being cut with saws, the hammering of metal, and many other sounds. I could hear people laughing, crying, and conversing. I could hear radio and television broadcasts. I could hear it all.
'What the hell…?! I shouted in my mind. I think... I think I can hear! Is this B-three's doing?
'Oh my god!' I was in tears, but nothing fell from my eyes.
Is this what happiness feels like? I'm overjoyed. I used to think that happiness was staring at my wide screen and stroking my... well, let's just say I thought happiness was something superficial. But this... this is something else. I can't even begin to explain it in words.
"Hey B-three, thanks so much, bro. I don't know how I can ever repay you." I cried, but it didn't hear me—or so I thought.
"Kkrrrk."
'What the...?'
At first, I thought I was hearing things, but it was definitely B-three trying to communicate. It spoke to me, though I couldn't understand a word.
'Hey B-three, what did you say?' I asked, my eyes wide open, staring at it.
"Krrak skkrr kkrhrh," it replied. I couldn't make sense of its words, but at that moment, I was simply happy to be alive.
Months passed after I regained my hearing. It was somewhat irritating at first, but I gradually got used to it. And that wasn't all. I didn't just regain my sense of hearing—it was enhanced as if I had undergone some kind of system upgrade. I could hear things from miles away, which, in the beginning, was the main source of my irritation.
'Oh god, I'm so happy. I just wish this could last forever,' I said.
"Krrhhk krhh," B-three responded.
"Right? Nothing lasts forever," I acknowledged.
My experience in school wasn't something I kept from my mother. I told her everything, from how I was beaten to a pulp by seniors and some of my classmates, to how I was forced to lick their shoes. Don't get the wrong idea—I wasn't a coward. I fought back countless times, but every time I did, I was beaten again. I came home with new injuries every day, and eventually, it got so bad that I was admitted to the hospital. I was given a bed and stayed there for over two weeks. My mom visited me every day, and every time she did, she would tell me something that really annoyed me at the time. But as time passed, I began to understand her words. She said:
"Nothing is permanent. Bad times are not permanent, and good times are also not permanent."
She urged me to find peace in conflicts and hope in despair.
My mom was a good woman, but I hated her. Not because she was good, but because she didn't understand me—she didn't understand how my life worked. My hatred for her grew as time went on, until the day I finally realized who she truly was. I realized the kind of life she had lived. I realized that it wasn't her who misunderstood me; it was I who had misunderstood her.
It was then that I understood what she really meant by "finding peace in conflicts, hope in despair."
I was her peace. I was her hope. That's why she pampered me. But in return, I couldn't do a single thing for her. I left home, leaving her alone, yet I continued to leech off her. I'm a terrible son, and she was a perfect mother—too perfect for a wasted son like me.
"I'm sorry, Mom. Please be safe. Don't worry about me—I will be fine. Please be safe, Mom."
****
A year before my rebirth.
After gaining my sense of hearing, I began testing it and became accustomed to hearing things from afar. Trust me, it's not as easy as you might think. Most of the time, it felt as if my eardrums were about to explode; other times, it was my brain. B-three also reacted to it whenever my brain hurt, making these weird screeching sounds.
Some months passed, and B-three grew bigger. I began having second thoughts, wondering if he was really feeding on me. After all, all he did was stay on my head, doing his stuff while I decayed as time passed. If that isn't enough proof, I honestly don't know what is.
I looked up at the sky, which was covered in light, dark smoke. The clouds weren't visible. I wondered where this smoke was coming from. It's not like the sky was ever clear; as long as I could remember, the clouds were always dark. But during night times like this, you could at least see a little bright—what was the name again?
I've forgotten, but that's by the way. In that instant, while staring at the night-dark clouds, I asked myself multiple questions to which I heard no reasonable answers:
Why am I still conscious?
Why is B-three patching me up?
If I truly make it out alive, will B-three take over my body while I watch him do whatever he pleases? He might even get some girls better than I ever could, hahaha.
"Will I end up becoming food for the beast?"
All these thoughts crossed my mind. For the first time in four years of staying idle, I thought deeply about my future, my source of hope—or despair. I don't know, but what was certain is that this is hope, yes, the will to believe.
Deep down, I wanted to live. Deep down, I wanted to come back. Deep down, I wanted B-three to patch me up quickly. I wanted to go back to my mom. Deep down, I wanted everything to start over.
Just then, while lost in my endless sea of thoughts, an electrifying sensation ran from my head to my heart and all over my body.
It was painful.
My mouth gaped open in an "O" shape, and my tongue moved.
I screamed loudly.
"Arrgh!"
Just then, it occurred to me that I had regained my sense of feeling. I could feel pain; I could feel my muscles.
Yes, this was good, but it was also a hellish experience, given the fact that I was decapitated in half.
I felt intense burning pain in my waist area.
I wanted to die. I screamed so loudly and continued screaming in pain for almost half an hour, my voice echoing in the night's darkness.
Suddenly, amidst my pain and suffering, I heard a screeching roar in my ear.
'What was that?' I questioned in my mind while screaming.
That roar was definitely not human, but I didn't panic because it was several miles away. Still, I questioned in my thoughts while screaming.
'Was that one of those beast?'
Out of the blue, B-three made its own roar. It was very small compared to the one I had heard, as if a cub was having a roar contest with a full-grown adult lion.
After its little roar, my vision went blank, my nose blocked, my ears deafened, and all the pain was gone. I couldn't feel a thing. I think I went back to my void state—no, I definitely went back to my void state.
But the reason for that was what bugged me.
Why did B-three roar? Why did that big guy roar? What happened? Was it because of me?
I thought as I floated in a wild expanse of nothingness—no light, no sound, just nothing.
Just then, I felt something walk past me.
'It's big,' I exclaimed.
The kind of aura it emitted was so wild that I could feel it within my void space.
In that moment, I realized that B-three was also not active.
'What is this?'
I think it's that thing called a self-defense mechanism that every living species has.
Was B-three shutting down its self-defense mechanism to protect itself and me? If that was the case, then I'm really glad I have B-three by my side—or rather, on my head.
After some minutes, the huge figure walked away, but still, I hadn't regained consciousness—or should I say, B-three didn't let me wake up? And I think I know why.
Despite being "asleep," so to speak, B-three kept working on my body.
Days passed, then weeks, then months, and I still hadn't regained consciousness.
A few months passed, and one day my eyes twitched open. The daylight attacked my eyes, sending a sharp pain all over my head. I closed my eyes, further blocking the light with my arm.
Seconds passed, and I got used to the sun's rays. I gradually opened my eyes, and behold, it was the usual dark clouds once again. I was happy, but deep down, I had expected something more, something new. That's when I noticed the pain was no more.
My waist didn't hurt, nor did my head. I scanned around and found my legs perfectly joined with my waist.
"What the…"
My voice was back. I pushed myself up but immediately fell back down. Nothing was wrong, I think; I was only getting used to walking after being immobilized for four years.
After many trials, I managed to get on my feet, but I had to support myself with the car behind me—the car I crashed onto on the day of the attack.
I further examined my surroundings. It was a total mess, which made me wonder how I managed to cope here all this while.
Yes, I know my room was always a mess, but this was really different. Trust me it was truly different
Dirt, blocks, and iron rods were scattered everywhere. It looked like a wasteland.
I looked up at the sky, clenched my fist, and stretched some parts of my body.
I was still having doubts and couldn't believe this was real, but indeed it was. I could feel everything as though I were alive.
Yes, I know it. I can feel it.
I am reborn.