When Granny Dot woke up – something which she was not expecting to do by the way – she found that for the first time in fifty years she wasn't in any pain. The bed she was laying in was softer by far than the ones in the hospital, probably softer than her own bed, and there was a warm breeze wafting in from somewhere. Well, she thought, maybe those Christians were right about Heaven. She had lived a good life after all, why shouldn't she go to heaven? Sitting up, she threw off the covers and swung her legs out of bed, admiring as she did so her youthful and… toned muscles? When had she ever been so muscular? She stood easily, relishing the feel of moving without the pang of arthritis in her joints. A quick glance around the lavishly decorated room revealed a mirror standing in the corner. Was it just her imagination or did the mirror flinch as she approached?
“Oh dear,” Granny Dot mumbled as she looked in the mirror. The reflection looking back at her was that of a tall man in his prime. He was handsome, muscular – and completely nude. Yes, she thought, this had to be Heaven, because no man on earth was built like that. Ezekiel 23:20 flashed through her head, but she quickly shook off the thought.
White hair, red eyes, an imposing figure… and that mirror was definitely quivering. This was all too familiar. It was just like her grandson’s novel, The Kiss of the Rose, a fantasy romance novel about a young woman named Rose who is discovered to have extraordinary magical powers. In spite of her common background, she gets invited to attend the Royal Academy, where she meets and falls in love with Elrin, a young knight, all while avoiding the advances of the villainous Lord Kerrian, Knight Commander of the Westmont Knights, and second son of the Duke of Westmont. In the novel, Lord Kerrian subjects Rose and Elrin to all sorts of hardships in an attempt to win Rose’s hand in marriage, not out of any amorous feelings he harbored, but rather because a marriage to such a powerful mage would ensure his position as the next Duke of Westmont, supplanting his elder brother’s position as heir. And judging from the novel’s description, Granny Dot was certain that she was somehow inhabiting the body of the villainous Lord Kerrian!
She smiled as she ogled her striking new reflection, flexing to better admire her rippling muscles. Her grandson certainly knew how to write a handsome antagonist. He had worked so hard on writing this novel. It was his very first published work, and he had been so excited when he gave her a copy signed with his first autograph. Granny Dot’s only regret was that her old age had caught up to her before she was able to finish reading it.
This is my chance to finish the story, she thought. She had never done anything villainous while she was alive, so she could only hope that she would live up to Lord Kerrian’s fearsome reputation. At the very least, she couldn't bear the thought of ruining the story her grandson had written, and this cowardly mirror should be able to help her.
“Mirror.” Granny Dot was momentarily taken aback by the voice that came from her throat, deep and rich like a drop of honey in Earl Grey. The mirror too jumped at the sound, letting out a squeal of terror. “Mirror, what is on my agenda for today?” This mirror was a sentient magical artifact that served a number of purposes, making it closer to a personal assistant than a piece of furniture.
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Eyes opened up on the polished wood frame of the mirror, moistening with tears as they looked at the lord. “You have, um, training with the recruits in an hour, an-and then lunch with your brother and the Duke. After lunch, you have the, uhh, Welcome Ball at the Royal Academy.” The mirror squeezed most of its eyes shut, squinting at him through a single eye at the top of the frame.
“Thank you, mirror,” Granny Dot replied reflexively before remembering Lord Kerrian’s role. “I’ll let you live another day.“ She would have to be careful about her attitude from now on.
The Welcome Ball was the start of the novel, where Rose meets both Elrin and Kerrian. Coming from a poor family, her plain dress immediately makes her stick out, attracting the scorn of the nobles and causing Elrin to come to her rescue. As far as Granny Dot could remember, Lord Kerrian didn’t have much of a role to play at the ball, so for now she wouldn’t worry about that, and would instead focus on making it through training.
The mirror dressed Kerrian in his usual garb – one of the many functions of this wonderful artifact – and he went on his way to the training grounds. Fortunately, Granny Dot found that she had access to a lot of Lord Kerrian’s memories, so she was able to reach her destination without getting lost in the labyrinthine corridors of the Westmont Manor. The faces she saw on the way were also quite familiar, from the cowering servants to the stoic knights. Sir Brend, Kerrian’s second-in-command, awaited his commander at the head of a well-regimented cluster of young knights-in-training, looking just as ruggedly handsome as she had imagined he would.
Throughout the training, Granny Dot relied heavily on Kerrian’s muscle memory, without which she doubted she could have survived. It was without a doubt the most grueling thing she had ever experienced, although the young trainees looked even worse off than herself. They were drenched in sweat, their flushed faces haggard as they swallowed rough gasps of air. Granny Dot couldn’t help the twang of pity in her heart. These boys couldn’t be much older than sixteen; they ought to be out with friends having fun. She knew this training was supposed to continue for another hour, but she called for a break in spite of that and was rewarded by confused grins from the exhausted boys.
“My lord, are you feeling unwell?” Sir Brend approached him, concern evident in his eyes.
“Of course not!” Granny answered. “I’m feeling better than I have in years!” She flashed him a reassuring smile as she said this, causing the color to drain from his face as he took an involuntary step back.
“Please head inside, my lord. I will send for a doctor immediately.”
Whoops, I got so excited I forgot who I’m supposed to be. Granny Dot grabbed the knight’s shoulder as he turned to leave. “Are you challenging my authority?” she growled, sending shivers down her own spine at the menacing timber of her voice. She hadn’t used a tone like this since her first husband had planted mint in her flower bed. Needless to say, divorce followed shortly thereafter.
Sir Brend now turned white as a sheet. “Of course not my lord! It’s just – this is very unusual. You have never called for a break before, so I assumed that you were feeling ill. This won’t happen again.” He gave a small bow as he rushed to explain himself.
Lord Kerrian narrowed his eyes at his subordinate before replying cooly, “When you assume, you make an ass out of you and me. Be sure this doesn't happen again.”