Katarina paced anxiously around her shop as she attempted to hail Spaceman via commlink once more. The Imperials had descended upon Junk City like a horde of locusts, most likely searching for whatever precious cargo their crashed ship had been carrying. The same crashed ship that Katarina had sent Spaceman to go dig around in just a few hours prior. "Come on, you idiot!" she growled. "Pick up!"

Jukkau did his best to continue working on the damaged roller engine in spite of Katarina's nervous pacing and impatient fidgeting. "" the matari said, wiping his grease-slicked talons on a towel. ""

"That's not why I'm freaking out!" she hissed. "I may have just sent one of my only actual friends on this rock to his death!"

She dialed him again, but there was still no answer. Katarina let out an angry sigh and kicked a toolbox across the room. "I gotta go do something about this..." she grumbled. "I can't just leave him out there with the Imperials tearing this place up."

Jukkau watched, head cocked to one side, as Katarina frantically scoured the shop for her gear. ""

Katarina grabbed her tool belt and slung it across her waist, threw on an armored duster that hung on the rack by the door, then pulled out her scattergun from its hidden compartment beneath her desk. "I'm gonna go find him!" she shouted, stuffing several blaster packs into her pockets.

Before heading out on her impromptu rescue mission, a sudden knock on the front door to her shop caused her to whirl around with her weapon at the ready. "Get behind me, Jukkau," she whispered.

"" Jukkau quietly replied, ducking down behind the desk.

The knocking continued, growing louder and louder. "Hello?" a woman's voice rang out. "I am in need of repairs. Are you open?"

Katarina hesitated before finally setting her gun aside. "Uh... yeah, sure, come on in," she answered.

The bell rang as the door slowly opened, revealing a robed woman with long dark hair. She held a simple staff of knarled wood in one hand, while the other was tucked away into her robe's pocket. The mysterious woman gave a slight bow. "My apologies for the intrusion."

Jukkau hopped up on Katarina's desk and gave the newcomer a curious tilt of his head. "" he said. ""

"My name is Rylee," the woman replied. "I was hoping you might be able to help me find someone. I am looking for an ex-Imperial pilot by the name of 'Billy Williams-Doom Jr.'

Katarina narrowed her eyes at the woman. "What the heck kind of name is 'Billy Williams-Doom Jr.?'" she asked. "If I knew anyone with a name that dumb, I'd probably remember it. And even if I did, I wouldn't sell him out to some random stranger, especially if he's holed up here on Hogwash. You're barking up the wrong tree, lady."

Rylee sighed. "I serve the Knights of the True Way, and I can assure you that I mean no harm to this man," she explained. "I believe he may have come into contact with a dangerous artifact, and it is imperative that I find him before the Imperials do."

Katarina let out a sigh of her own. "Ugh, you're one of them mystical culty types, aren't you?"

"I would hardly call the Knights of the True Way a 'cult,'" Rylee replied.

"You guys believe in space magic and mysticism and all that junk, right?" Katarina shot back. "You're a cult, then."

Rylee shook her head. "We are getting off track," she said. "Are you going to tell me where to find Billy Williams-Doom Jr. or not?"

"Look, lady, I already told you I got no idea who this guy is," Katarina replied. "The only ex-Imperial pilot I know is some idiot who wears a space suit everywhere and talks to geese or whatever. And he's in some deep poodoo right now, so if we're done with all this cult nonsense, I need to be going."

Rylee shook her head. "Very well, then," she replied. "I did not want to do this, but you have forced my hand. If I cannot find this man, the galaxy is doomed."

The robed woman pressed two fingers against her temple, and Katarina suddenly felt like a presence was digging around her thoughts. The mechanic gritted her teeth as she resisted the intrusion, but she could feel her strength fading as Rylee dug deeper and deeper into her subconscious. As her knees buckled, Katarina grabbed the nearby workbench to steady herself and reached for her scattergun, but before she could grasp it, Rylee had already taken what she needed.

"So... you have met him," Rylee said. "This... 'Spaceman' fellow is indeed the one I am looking for. I truly am sorry for the mental intrusion, but the fate of the galaxy is at stake. And from what I have managed to glean from you, the Imperials may already have him in their custody. I must make haste."

Jukkau leaped to his feet, his feathers standing on end as he fluffed them out angrily. "" the matari shrieked. ""

Katarina held a hand in front of Jukkau as she struggled to hold herself upright. "It's okay, Jukkau. I'm okay," she groaned. "I think."

After a few deep breaths to clear her mind, Katarina stood up and raised her scattergun. "Alright, lady. You got a lot of nerve coming into my place of business and using your mystical nonsense to mess with my head," she said, trying to sound intimidating, although her voice was still a bit shaky. "Tell me what you want with Spaceman, or I'll blast you full of holes!"

Rylee held out her hands in a defensive stance. "As I told you before," she replied, "I am a servant of the Knights of the True Way. We have long studied the prophecies and predictions of Theolman, a wise oracle of our order. According to Theolman's visions, this... 'Spaceman's' destiny is tied to that of seven ancient artifacts of terrible power. We believe he may have already absorbed the power of one of the artifacts, and if the Imperials get their hands on him now, it could be catastrophic."

Katarina lowered her weapon slightly. "If you knew this guy like I do, you'd understand how ridiculous that sounds," she said. "Still, it's kinda my fault he's in this mess, and I was just on my way to help him. You want to team up? Strength in numbers or whatever. I'm good with tech and shooting things, but space magic is a bit out of my wheelhouse."

Rylee nodded. "It seems that our interests align," she said. "Very well, I shall join you."

"What about you, Jukkau?" Katarina asked. "You in on this too?"

"" he replied, crossing his arms and looking away in an exaggerated manner. ""

"I'll give you a raise," the mechanic offered.

"" the matari exclaimed. ""

* * *

Spaceman stood in Bedlam's tent, quietly hovering over a crude map of the admin building that the combat cyborg had drawn in the sand. "I'm not sure how I feel about your plan," he grumbled.

Bedlam sighed. "Well, it's the plan I've got," he argued. "I'll go over it one more time. Step 1: Infiltrate the admin building. Step 2: Find the generator in the basement and set it to overload. Step 3: Escape the blast radius. Step 4: Wait for the Empire to send reinforcements. Step 5: Commandeer a ship. Step 6: Enjoy our freedom."

"'How to Escape From Prison in Six Easy Steps' sounds more like a self-help pamphlet than an actual plan," said Spaceman, shaking his head. "But you're right; I suppose it's better than sitting here and doing nothing."

"Exactly," Bedlam said. "And if things go sideways, we'll at least have an army of pissed-off criminals fighting alongside us."

"Against their small army of war mechs," Spaceman reminded him.

"Bah, those clunkers are at least three generations behind what the Imps use in the field," he scoffed. "We got this."

"Quick question though, how are we actually supposed to get into the admin building?" Spaceman asked. "It's got to be locked up higher than a black hole's... black hole. If we try to waltz through the front door, we'll just get blasted to smithereens!"

"Correct," said Bedlam. "That's why I've been digging a tunnel beneath the wall over the past year or so. Just need some improvised explosives to breach the foundation, and we'll be golden."

"Do you... have these explosives already?"

"I do," Bedlam replied. "But... there still is one last hiccup, and it's what we need your space magic for. See, there's a small family of Beakers that recently decided my tunnel would be a great place for them to nest. They're big, angry birds, but I don't want to just blast my way through them, so I need you to pacify them while I take care of the foundation. Talking with animals is a thing you Space Wizards actually can do, right?"

"Yes, sort of," Spaceman replied. "I've only ever used it with geese, though."

"What?" Bedlam asked. "Why only geese?"

Spaceman shrugged. "I dunno, man, I don't make the rules of space magic," he said. "But I can probably pull it off with these Beakers. Also, what actually is a Beaker?"

"They're large, angry, flightless birds native to this planet," Bedlam explained. "They'll eat pretty much anything, which includes people if they're hungry enough. I can handle them in a fight if we need to, but we'll lose the element of surprise if I have to start blasting things."

"So, basically, I need to use my mystical powers to convince some big angry bird things not to eat us?" Spaceman asked. "Sounds risky, putting this all on me. I'm not even a real Space Wizard, you know. I left the monastery before I finished my training."

"Look, man, I'm not asking you to blow up a mountain or something," Bedlam replied. "All you gotta do is talk to some birds. Think of them as really big geese if you have to. You've got this. I have faith in you, Spaceman."

"Why?" he asked. "You've known me for like three whole hours."

Love this novel? Read it on Royal Road to ensure the author gets credit.

Bedlam shrugged. "I guess you remind me of an old war buddy from my Commonwealth military days," he answered. "He was a real piece of work. Always joking around, never taking things too seriously, and getting under everyone's skin. But when things went sideways, he was the guy you wanted next to you in a fight. I watched him make the impossible happen. So I'm gonna go with my gut on this one and put my trust in you, Spaceman."

"I'm flattered, but you really shouldn't."

"If you can't believe in yourself, then believe in me, who believes in you," Bedlam said, patting Spaceman on the shoulder.

"That doesn't make any sense," Spaceman told him.

"Sure it does."

"Fine," Spaceman sighed. "But if I get eaten, it's your fault."

"Fair enough," Bedlam chuckled as he picked up the ramshackle backpack filled with explosives. "Let's get to work."

Bedlam led the way from the encampment toward the thick wall surrounding the admin building. As they approached, Spaceman could see multiple sentry towers with heavy blasters mounted along various points on the wall. The facility's entrance was heavily fortified with a pair of large metal doors that looked nearly a meter thick. Luckily, Bedlam's tunnel was carefully hidden off to the side beneath a small pile of rubble and trash.

The two of them wasted no time clearing away the debris, and moments later, they were moving through the tunnel. It was dark and cramped, barely large enough for them to walk side by side, but Bedlam had clearly put a lot of work into it, so Spaceman decided against complaining.

After a few minutes, the tunnel opened up into a larger chamber, and they came upon the small Beaker nest that had been built up directly against the admin building's foundation. There were at least half a dozen Beakers, each as tall as a grown human, with long legs and necks, a pointed beak, and a pair of large eyes. Their bodies were covered in coarse, bristly feathers that ranged in color from light brown to black. "Alright, Spaceman," Bedlam whispered, doing his best not to agitate the animals. "Do your thing."

With a deep breath to calm himself, Spaceman carefully stepped forward, holding out a hand toward the Beakers. "Hey, fellas, how ya doing?" he spoke. "We're just gonna be passing through, okay?"

The birds all stopped and eyed Spaceman for several agonizingly long seconds before dispersing throughout the cavern and allowing the two to continue onward. "See? I knew you could do it," said Bedlam. "What did they say?"

"Well," Spaceman explained. "They were gonna eat us, but they didn't like that you were mostly made of metal bits, and they thought that I was a robot."

"Wait, are you a robot?" Bedlam asked.

"Uh... no?" Spaceman replied, giving the cyborg an odd look. "I mean... I don't think so? Dangit, now that's gonna be bothering me all day."

Bedlam chuckled and placed the backpack down at the foot of the foundation. "You've done your part. I'll take it from here," he said as he began placing his explosives. "But keep that blaster at the ready. Once we go loud, the Imps and their war mechs are gonna come running."

"Got it," said Spaceman, gripping his pistol tightly. "Uh... do we need a 'go' signal or something?"

"There will be an explosion, and then that wall will turn into a doorway," Bedlam replied, pointing to the foundation. "Now go hide behind something."

Spaceman did as he was told, ducking behind a boulder, and after a few more moments of preparation, Bedlam rushed over and joined him. The cyborg counted down from three, and then the cavern was filled with the deafening crackle of the explosion. Dust and debris filled the air, and the Beakers were sent into a frenzy, scattering in all directions, but as the smoke cleared, Spaceman and Bedlam could see that the explosion had succeeded in creating a breach in the foundation. "Alright, we're in!" Bedlam shouted. "Let's move!"

They rushed through the new opening, finding themselves in the basement level of the admin building, which, conveniently, was where the main generator was located. Bedlam hurried to a nearby terminal and jammed a cybernetic finger into its universal data port, interfacing directly with the generator's systems. After a few seconds, alarms began blaring, and the nearby generator began to groan and whine as its internal mechanisms began to overload. "Is that it?" Spaceman asked. "Can we get the heck out of here?"

"So... I may have forgotten to mention Step 2.5: Stop the Imperials from preventing the overload," Bedlam replied. "We need to hold the room for a bit."

"Oh, of course!" Spaceman grumbled. "Why wouldn't there be a random half-step you forgot to tell me about?"

The door to the basement slid open with a hiss, revealing a trio of Imperial war mechs, each one equipped with a blaster carbine and a stun baton. "Drop your weapons and surrender!" the lead mech ordered, leveling his blaster at Bedlam.

Bedlam was having none of it. He raised his cybernetic arm, which quickly transformed into a gatling blaster, and let loose a torrent of energy bolts that ripped through the mechs like they were made of wet tissue paper. The machines fell to the floor, their components sparking and smoking as they short-circuited.

Spaceman blinked, staring at the carnage for a long moment before turning to Bedlam. "What the heck, man? You've got a frickin' cannon in your arm?!"

"You have no idea what I got in my arms," Bedlam laughed. "Just be glad we're on the same side."

"Well, yes, I am officially way less worried about holding the room now," Spaceman replied.

"That's good," said Bedlam, "because here comes another wave of them!"

Spaceman took cover and drew his pistol just as a second group of war mechs entered the room. He popped out and fired off several shots, scoring hits on two of the mechs, while Bedlam unleashed another salvo of blaster fire and tore through the rest.

"This is going to get hairy really quick," Bedlam said. "We've got a few minutes before the generator hits the point of no return, but there's no way we're not facing stiff opposition. You good to go?"

"Probably," Spaceman replied. "As long as you've got no other surprises for me."

"No promises," said Bedlam.

A third wave of war mechs entered the room, and this time, there was a clear escalation of force. Accompanying the usual squad of humanoid mechs was a Devastator Warbot, a heavily armored walking tank with a gatling blaster of its own. "Surrender or face certain annihilation," the warbot said in a deep, robotic monotone. "You have no chance to survive make your time."

Spaceman dove back behind cover while Bedlam opened fire. He cut down a few more of the humanoid mechs, but his gatling blaster seemed no match for the Devastator's heavy armor. "Dangit, I can't damage that thing!" he shouted, ducking behind a console as the warbot returned fire. "You got any ideas, Spaceman?"

After popping out and dropping a few more war mechs with his pistol, Spaceman noticed one of the mechs' stun batons lying against the ground. "Yeah..." he replied. "But I don't think you're gonna like it. Can you distract the big guy?"

Bedlam nodded, and his other cybernetic arm became sheathed in electricity. "Whatever you're gonna do, be quick about it!" he shouted, diving out from behind cover.

The cyborg rushed the Devastator, ducking and weaving to avoid its gatling blaster before leaping high into the air. As gravity carried him down toward the Devastator, Bedlam raised his electrified fist and slammed it down on the warbot's head. Electricity arced across the Devastator's body, causing sparks to fly, but the Devastator still had plenty of fight left. It reached out a claw and grabbed Bedlam by the throat, lifting him into the air and slamming him against the ground.

Spaceman leaped into action, taking out the last few war mechs with his pistol, then scrambled toward the nearest unattended stun baton. As he scooped the weapon up, the Devastator turned its attention to him and opened fire with its gatling blaster. The flurry of energy bolts whizzed over Spaceman's head as he dove to the ground, but his momentum carried him forward, and he slid right between the Devasator's legs.

"I call this one 'the Spaceman Special!' he shouted as he jammed the stun baton into the Devastator's unarmored rump.

Sparks flew and circuits fried as the warbot convulsed from the electrical current. It released Bedlam from its iron grip and let out a robotic groan before dropping to its knees and falling on its face with a mighty crash.

"Wow," Spaceman said, standing up and dusting himself off. "I am really glad that actually worked. Are you alright?"

Bedlam pulled himself to his feet with a grunt but gave Spaceman a thumbs-up. "Nothing the nanomachines can't fix," he replied. "But I think we've held this place long enough. Let's get out of here before the generator goes critical."

The two of them made their escape, and just as they exited the tunnel, most of the admin building and a section of the perimeter wall exploded into a ball of fire and sent a shockwave through the surrounding area. "I know it worked out for us and all, but they really should make generators less prone to exploding like that," Spaceman remarked.

"Yep," said Bedlam, nodding. "That is a health and safety issue right there."

As Spaceman and Bedlam surveyed their handiwork, a battle cry rang throughout the camp, and a mob of angry prisoners rushed the now burning facility with makeshift weapons in hand, presumably to loot the smoldering ruins for supplies. "Well, there goes the neighborhood," Spaceman said. "Which step are we on now?"

"Step 4: Wait for the Empire to send reinforcements," Bedlam replied. "Shouldn't take long, given we just interrupted their little reality show."

A roar suddenly pierced the sky as what looked like an Imperial troop transport ship descended. "Wow, check out that response time," Spaceman remarked. "And... that would make Step 5?"

"Hold on," said Bedlam. "I don't think that's one of theirs. Take a closer look."

Spaceman squinted his eyes, and after a moment of staring, he could see that the vessel had been cobbled together from scrap and only vaguely resembled a troop transport. It circled around a few times before setting down just beyond the outer edge of the tent city, and its boarding ramp extended. A trio of figures emerged, and Spaceman quickly recognized the flame-colored hair of his favorite mechanic among them. "I know that person!" he shouted.

"Awesome," said Bedlam. "Sounds like we get to skip a few steps, then. Lead the way."

Spaceman and Bedlam approached the junk ship just as Katarina was disembarking. She spotted the duo immediately and was already making her way toward them. "Spaceman!" she shouted. "Man, am I glad you're not dead! What's going on over there?"

"Hey, Kat, this is Bedlam," said Spaceman, gesturing to his partner in crime. "We just caused an explosion and also a prison riot, so I'm guessing we should probably leave?"

Katarina gave Bedlam a quick up-and-down look, then shrugged. "Alright, well, you're gonna have to tell me all about that later," she said. "But you're right; we should definitely be leaving."

"I second that," Bedlam added. "Because of the reinforcements and all."

"Reinforcements?" Rylee asked. "How do you know there are reinforcements?"

"Because we caused an explosion and a prison riot for the express purpose of luring the Empire here so we could steal a ship," said Spaceman. "It's Step 5. Or maybe Step 6? I don't know, I lost track. But we should go now, please."

Katarina nodded. "Yeah, let's roll," she agreed. "We can talk about everything later."

Without further deliberation, they boarded the ship. As Spaceman walked through the main corridor toward the cockpit, however, he could not help but feel a sense of familiarity. "This ship looks kind of like my old troop carrier," he said. "Weird."

"Uh... yeah, that's because this is your old troop carrier," Katarina explained as she sat in the co-pilot's seat beside Jukkau.

Spaceman quickly buckled himself into one of the empty jump seats. "I thought you were gonna scrap it for parts!"

"I mean, I started to," said Katarina. "But then I kinda decided I wanted to build my own ship instead of just fixing up the same old junk."

Bedlam and Rylee took their seats as Juakku flipped several switches and pushed a lever forward. The rumbling of the engine reverberated through the deck plating as the ship lifted off the ground. The matari then gripped the controls and pulled hard, sending the ship rocketing skyward.

"You built yourself a ship?" said Spaceman. "That's rad!"

"Yep," Katarina replied. "And if we make it through the next fold without exploding, I'll even give her a proper name. Speaking of which, where are we headed anyway?"

The ship soon broke through the atmosphere, and the blue skies of the planet quickly gave way to the starry void of space. "I kinda wanna just go back to Hogwash, honestly," Spaceman replied, glancing around the cockpit. "I'm starting to get sick of being off-world."

"Yeah, we're not doing that," said Katarina. "The Imperials are swarming all over the place, and given I shot a few of them while trying to find out where they took you, it's not safe for us there anymore."

"We should go to Tangle," Rylee chimed in. "Theolman will want to meet with you, Spaceman."

"I'm sorry, who are you?" Spaceman asked. "Also, who is Theolman?"

Before Rylee could answer, Katarina cut in. "This is Rylee; she's from a weirdo space magic cult that thinks you're the messiah or something," she explained. "She did help me out with this rescue business, though, so maybe we should humor her?"

"The Knights of the True Way are not a 'weirdo space magic cult,'" Rylee corrected. "We are an ancient and powerful order dedicated to studying the mystic arts. And we have no intention of worshiping you as a god, Spaceman. We simply wish to aid you on your journey to prevent a coming disaster."

Spaceman shook his head and sighed. "Well, that sounds serious, but I'm pretty sure the Knights of the True Way are totally a weirdo space magic cult," he said. "But that sounds like our only option right now. Unless you've got somewhere else you think we should go, Bedlam?"

Bedlam shook his head. "I was stuck in Super XTREEM Space Jail for years," he explained. "I mean, I'd like to report back to the Gagarin Rebels at some point, but it's not like they've been looking for me. This cult business sounds like it might be important, though, and Tangle's as good a place as any to lay low for a while."

"Stop calling it a cult!" Rylee shouted. "We're an ancient and noble order of mystics and scholars!"

Katarina held up a hand for silence. "Alright, enough," she said. "We're decided, so let's get the heck out of here. Take us to Tangle, Jukkau."

The matari pilot let out a series of squawks and chirps. "" he replied.

Jukkau entered a set of coordinates into the ship's nav computer, and the ship's Origami Drive hummed to life. As the universe collapsed and folded around itself, the ship left the infamous Super XTREEM Space Jail in the dust.