The vigor of youth.
Long has it been since he had felt it in such high quantities. Oh, yes, elves could certainly live longer and feel younger even at a proportionally more advanced age. Potential in magic wasn’t the only blessing they had offered themselves, as they had molded their people throughout the ages. Magic and body and mind all. They thought faster and their memory could hold on to a higher amount of information than other races. They were more enduring, more spry and more lithe than most others. Some of his kin were even venturing into evolving their souls, though that was a practice he preferred not to think of.
Yet, right now, Regitris felt young.
And that had something to do with the vigorous woman who had he had been sharing his bed and his heart for the past few years.
Ravena.
He had been fascinated since the first time he had laid eyes on her. Then ashamed of himself, because even by human standards, she was young. Too young. Her people might consider her a full woman, but her people… He had qualms with her people.
So he refrained his gaze, though the fascination never left him. He despaired, at first, seeing the path she chose for herself. One he thought was the same as her people’s. He despaired even more when he saw the one she so closely bonded with, the boy orc, a barbarian freshly emerged from the crimson past.
But then, the most miraculous thing happened. She surprised him.
Him, who thought he had seen mostly all, in one form or another. And he was so proud of her for that.
Ravena didn’t fall prey to the old sins. She took the affinity of her people, but didn’t let it shape her. She shaped it. She did not become a |Witch| or a |Shaman| or any other foul classes. She became a |Mage| and whether it was because of her influence or maybe just mutual understanding, the orc boy did as well. The both broke free from their past and went on to become living proof that the wild and the green could be tamed. Repurposed. Guided to a better future.
How proud he was.
Yet he still couldn’t near her. Not as he wanted. So he played the role of the old mentor, helping them as best he could, for he had taken a liking to Kelunad as well. And always he wondered if the glances she sent him, that she thought so well hidden, had more meaning in them than mere interest. Always he wondered if he saw in those acts his own hidden wishes or of there was something more.
He despaired again, when the foulest of the academy placed that blasted test before them. The ruling was just. That abomination should have been punished. But not by them.
Not by her.
He thought he lost her that day. That she would hate him for all time, because of what he had not been capable of averting. But fate was kind to him. And so was she, because later that day, she shared his kiss and he shared her tears.
Before they both shared a bed.
And now, years later, Ravena was finally a member of the academy. A researcher, not like her friend Kelunad, who oddly enough went into teaching. Now, there was no longer any need to hide their relationship. Not that any mage worth their Spells didn’t know about it already.
“Still musing at the ceiling old man.” a splendid voice called from behind him.
He smiled, without turning.
“I had thought you would stop calling me that after so many displays of virility.”
“Nah, it just sounds right, you know?” she laughed and kissed him. “We’re not making you uncomfortable, right, Kel?”
“I do believe you would only intensify your comments if I were to say yes.”
“And you’d be right.” She grinned.
They were all waiting at the gates of Gnosis, waiting for the arrival of one late student. One that the recruiter mentioned was ‘important’, but refused to transmit any other details.
Fear of interception perhaps?
No matter. With them two by his side, Regitris was prepared for anything. Speaking off… Regitris chanced a glance at Kelunad.
You never developed affection for her? Never more than the pure friendship you offered?
Or perhaps you did, but stepped back to let her enjoy her choice. If that is so, I thank you, my friend.
As if reading his mind, Kelunad caught his glance at winked, making him startle.
There’s that damned mind-reading trick again.
But he was spared from laughing or shivering, by a whoosh of air, the surest sign of teleportation, washing over them.
“Welcome to Gnosis Academy, my dear… would be… student.” Regitris stammered.
“Oh, wow. Reg, is that… That can’t be.”
“That is a nymph.” Kelunad spoke in a heavy tone.
***
Fate smiles and fate frowns.
Why, oh why, couldn’t he have only the former?
Three years had passed since that blasted day. Three years of constantly refraining himself from slaughtering that misbegotten wench of a–
No. No, I must not think like this.
That nymph was the old enemy. She was. How could she not be? But perhaps… the enemy of old is not the enemy of now. Ravena had harnessed the green, Kelunad had harnessed the wild… perhaps she could as well. Yes, it was harder for her…
Impossible. NO! No, just… hard.
It had to be, for the green ran in her as much deeper than the wild ran in Kel. But if they could do it… perhaps she could as well.
And to be true, the nymph did show no sign of malice. She was in her third year now and was the true to life model of a perfect student. Studious, respectful, gifted. Some still hated her, but by now the Naturalists and Martials have grown and changed and the leaders of the two factions, his friend and his heart, made well sure all students would be treated the same, regardless of inclinations. By force, if need be.
The nymph studied all kinds of magic too, which mollified any ill-lookers. She would doubtlessly gain a specialized Class befitting her nature, since the influence inside her was too strong, but for now she was a |Mage|.
He checked.
And Regitris… Regitris thought he could live with a nymph |Green Mage| inside his halls.
How times change. I cannot tell if that makes me feel old or young.
And more than anything, the two closest to him adored her.
“Regitris.” Ravena smiled, as he entered the classroom. “Just in time. We were just wrapping up.”
“Ravena, my dear. Kelunad.” He said, inclining his head, before his smile dropped a bit. “Mage Melopee.”
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“Mage Regitris.” She said, deferentially. “Mage Ravena, I look forward to continuing our session tomorrow.”
“’Mage Ravena’.” She huffed. “I bet Kel taught you to call me that. How many times do I need to repeat myself? It’s Ravena. Just that.”
“Yes, Mage Ravena.” She said, bowing and leaving the room, a shadow of a smile on her face.
His heart turned cold eyes towards the orc.
“And I bet you find this real funny, don’t you?”
“You are a member of the academy now.” The orc said, unrepentant. “And yes. Deeply.”
Regitris himself laughed, before his love turned those fiery eyes towards him.
“And you. You still have a problem with her?”
“I… do not. Yet you must understand, her presence is still unsettling to me. But I try to do my best.”
“Uh-huh. But are you still suspicious of her?”
“Well…”
“Caution is a virtue all on its own.” Kelunad sagely commented.
Regitris made sure to send him a very thankful look, at which the orc finely smiled.
“Wh- You know, what? Whatever. Keep your secrets. That’s not what we gotta talk about anyway.”
“Indeed.” Regitris said. “Why have you called me here?”
Ravena wavered and he thought that could never be a good sign.
Yet, like every time Ravena wavered, Kelunad stepped in.
“Both me and Ravena wish to take a few years away from the academy.”
“Wh- why?” Regitris asked, slightly more alarmed than he intended. “Even without mentioning that the academy doesn’t allow time off for even… well, me. Not without good reason. Even without that, what would possess you to leave?”
Not because you wish to go back to your people. Please, by magic, not that.
“Reg… both of us want to return to our homes.”
He felt the floor rush off from under him. His magic broiled, but his heart was still. As still as his face and perhaps just as bloodless.
No. No… why- Why would you leave me? For them?
No, please… no.
All of that, all of his torture, lasted for perhaps only a couple of seconds, for elves thought fast.
But that was enough for one of them to notice.
“We wish to return so that we may change our cultures.” Kelunad said. “What we learned here, both about magic and about ourselves, can be used to change our entire societies. We do not wish to abandon Gnosis. Nor you.”
“Wh- Wait. You thought I was going to become one of my people again and leave you? You… ugh! Both lovable and idiot.” Ravena shrieked and laughed, managing to kiss him and roll her eyes at the same time.
“I… It shames me, but yes, my first thought went to that possibility.”
“A thought only guided by fear, my friend. It shames you not.”
Regitris smiled back, grateful, but had to ask the obvious question.
“You think there is a chance? I know that both the people of the deep woods and the orcs are… quite trenched in their ways. You believe you could change that? Make them embrace the magic of mages?”
“Not all of them…” Ravena muttered. “And not quickly. But I’m a powerful mage now. A Gnosis graduate and a member of the academy. I could probably take on all the elders by myself.”
Kelunad coughed audibly.
“Not that we mean to practice violence. I’m serious.” She waved her hands. “Even if they attack us. …Kel made me promise.”
“It is our names that will change minds.” The orc spoke. “Our reputation and our magic. And… it is time. Too long have the minds of my people been lost to the bloodmist. The red rage. What Gnosis helped me make of myself, I want to help them make of themselves.”
“Me too. Not the rage thing, but their dependence on the forests. The… the rituals and the backward beliefs. Praying to long-dead idols. I want my people to evolve too, just I like did.”
So proud. So very proud.
“Then you truly believe it can be done.” the elf said. “That the old age can finally be ended, at least for your peoples.”
“Yup.” Ravena smiled at him, like the sun to the moon. “And that means one more thing too. You can finally stop fearing nature. Not all of it, I’m not a child. But I think this will help you and Gnosis both. Help you finally make peace.”
Peace. Such a foreign word at times. The lack of fear. He… he would like that.
“To make friends with nature. Again, after untold millennia.” He muttered, eyes far away. “I believe I am young enough to learn how to live with that.”
They laughed and he admitted he had been won over.
The next day he rallied and convinced the entire academy to let them go back to the outer world.
The next week they were gone.
His heart ached, but his heart was out there, bringing hope back into his heart.
***
Regitris was running. His body was old, but his blood was burning. Rage. Rage beyond what Kelunad could muster. Beyond what any other species felt. The old rage. The old hatred. Burning again, like a beacon in his very soul.
That she could do this. After everything.
That she could betray them.
He should never have allowed Ravena to leave. Neither her, nor Kelunad. Their purpose was good and just, but look at what happened. Their cultures responded with violence. They had grown more savage, not less. They responded to change with adversity.
Kelunad had been fighting wars, one after the other. Sometimes in groups, but often alone, against an army of his kin and their allies. What tears he cried, Regitris did not know. And his love. Her own people had seen her as an infiltrator. A corrupter. They fought her and though she managed to organize few groups of like-minded people, her elders called her movement of thought and magic a rebellion. Usury. They hunted her and she was always in hiding, protecting the few that accepted her teachings.
And now they were both away, fighting for causes that might never see the light of day.
Away, when… when she broke loose.
Regitris tried. No one could deny him this. He had tried and though he never liked her, he had learned to accept the young nymph. Even to guide her, from a distance. She had been close to earning his grudging respect. Perhaps she already had.
She had graduated. With full honors. Without a faction, but with the respect and admiration of almost the entire faculty on her, for her talent and hard work. And she had gained a new Class. What, Regitris did not know, for he had used his Spells on her too late. But whatever it was, it made her flee from the closing ceremony. Flee to the castle.
And gripped by an old fear, Regitris gave chase.
She saw her running to the lower floors, stopping for only moments, to blast anyone in her way. She was strong, but that wasn’t a reason to fear. Regitris was strong. The reason he felt fear was because he felt the magic on her… the old magic. The green magic. And it stank like never before.
He called to them. Ravena and Kelunad. Send them Spells, desperate pleas, calling them back. He needed to be sure. He wanted to know it was not his own madness, his paranoia breaking loose. They cast back, telling him they were on their way.
But he couldn’t wait.
So he ran after her, deeper and deeper, past dangers even he would have hesitated in facing. Yet the old monsters and constructs didn’t hamper her. They parted for her, as if in a daze. And she tore through the traps.
Wheezing, feeling his true age he finally caught up to her. And his eyes widened.
She was kneeling at the heart of a great tree, all the light in the great room emanating from it.
“I knew it was here.” She said, in a low voice. “I always suspected… but now I know.”
A… Silvan Guardian? Or a dryad in… No! That’s… that’s a treant!
“Dear girl. Dear girl, what are you doing?”
“’Dear girl’.” She said, voice growing scornful. “You always hated me, Mage Regitris. Feared me. Do not try and hide your true thoughts now.”
“I… Yes. I feared you. Feared you because of what you are. But… you have showed me wrong. You have showed this old fool you are a true mage of Gnosis. Please… whatever you think you should be doing… do not.”
“What I think? It is what I have to do.” She said to him, turning, before shouting. “What I was meant to do! I know the old stories. The fools. The murderers. The elves! You hold nothing sacred. But I? I do! I learned here and grew here, but this is what I am!”
She was pointing at the great tree and at her touch, its trunk manifested a host of colors.
“I… I will give myself to it. I will sacrifice myself. And my life and magic will awaken it.”
“Melopee, please. That is a thing of the past. I did not even know it stood here. But please, you are your own person. Please, don’t do this. I… can’t let you.”
“You do not have a choice.” She said, sounding both happy and sad.
“Why are you doing this?!” he screamed.
“Because… I remember. My Class made me remember. About what you and your kin have done. About what me and mine lost. And him?” she asked, looking at the tree. “He is one of the last few hopes we have, growing in the citadel of the enemy.”
“Few?” Regitrs asked, face drained of blood. “There are more?”
“Yes.” She smiled. “None as great. And now, I bid you farewell, keeper of mages.”
“Melopee, no! Please. If you do this… I cannot allow you to do this. If you will… I must…”
“Kill me? I think not, old one. I believe that is why my people sent me. I see it now. A gambit. A sacrifice. But one that has chances of succeeding, since… the elves have hearts as well. That we remember too. …I am sorry.”
She turned and started to meld with the tree.
And Regitris despaired. And his heart bled. And he wished he could do anything, everything but for this not to happen.
Not only for his student. But for hope. That the old hatred could finally pass. Yet… it still held on. And if he allowed the treant to awaken… How many more would die?
He despaired, but in the end… he was still Regitris. One of the leaders of his race. |Exemplar of Gnosis|.
Let my heart be cold. I pray upon magic… let me end this.
“|Magic is Might|.”
Melopee died. The tree protected her physical form, but she remained lifeless, half melded with the treant.
That was how Ravena and Keluand found him, standing and weeping over the corpse of their favorite student.
And he raged at the loss of hope, at the old hatred born anew. And they raged back, for their own despair crushed them and they only saw that young nymph, so eager for knowledge, always with a smile on her face.
They raged and fought and it sounded like tears falling. And that was how the break happened.
Did they plan even this? My enemies. That I should be alone?
Kelunad would come to forgive the elf and Regitris him, in the years to come. Since it was nothing to forgive, really. Just pain, too much not to be shared around. But Ravena never recovered. Not from her people, nor from Melopee’s death and not from the words they threw at each other after.
And that was how he lost his heart. By the deed of others and his own word.
He felt it so much now, every time he saw her in the hallways.
The loneliness of age.