“Rilla,” Brand asked quietly. “Do you want me?”
He had already taken her to his room and told her to undress. She had, and she was standing naked before him, waiting for him to touch her. She was beautiful, and he did like her, but Seri’s words were starting to press into his ears, over and over. What she said about him being a rapist, holding a knife to girls’ throat. He didn’t like that image.
“Yes, of course,” Rilla said. “I’ve been waiting for this moment all day.”
“Because if you don’t want to do this—”
She pressed a finger to his lip. “I do,” she whispered. “I want this.”
She kissed him, and he stopped asking after that. Rilla, at least, was not a virgin, which somehow helped absolve him of his guilt. It also meant she knew what she was doing. She peeled off layers of his clothing, but she did not peel off the illusion, which he wore no matter what. He appeared as what she liked best. To please her, to make her happy.
Afterwards, as they lay in bed together, his right arm encircling her stomach and his left hand brushing the curls off her neck, he thought to himself that this was not rape. Of course not. It was seduction, something a country virgin clearly knew nothing about. He never told the girls he required them to sleep with him. They offered.
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“Rilla,” he murmured, as he stroked her neck. “You’re so lovely in the moonlight.”
“Thank you,” she said. “Will you break the curse now?”
“Hm?” he said tiredly. “Oh. Yes.”
He raised his left hand and made a twist in the air. Simple thing really, breaking a one-sided binding. Anyone could do it—anyone with the slightest knowledge of magic. He felt the curse collapse, dissolve into air. The magic left Rilla’s body. He put his hand back onto her neck.
“Is it done?” she asked.
“Yes.”
“I won’t turn into a dragon?”
“No.”
“Thank you.”
She brought his hand to her mouth and kissed his palm.
“And tomorrow,” she said. “You’ll take me back home?”
“You don’t want to stay?” he asked, brushing his hand through her curls.
There was a long pause.
“But the jewel… how could I bring it to you, if we stay here?”
His hand dropped from her hair.
“I’m kidding, my darling. We’ll leave first thing tomorrow.”
“You promise?”
“Yes.” He rolled to his side, away from her.
He shouldn’t have asked her to stay, even in jest. One night together, and then it was done. It was like a contract, a bargain, a temporary binding. Conditions fulfilled and both parties left. That was how he wanted it. That was how he meant it to go.
He’d learned his lesson after Ailis.
After she had… after she had said…
You liar! You said you’d take me home. I did everything you told me to, and you still won’t let me go! You ruined my life, you monster, you—
Brand shut his eyes.
No.
He wasn’t repeating that.
It wasn’t good to keep girls too long. The longer they stayed, the more they ended up hurting him.