Novels2Search
Generations of Guilt
Returning Home

Returning Home

The skunk lived. How heroic was it to spare him? As he put the skunk’s home behind him, he could not shed the nagging thought that this was not over. May have been his imagination, but he rarely spared people.

For good reason, considering what he had seen. Once, it ended poorly. In recent memory, it ended in mystery. He was still not certain what Josh did with John Doe. The state of unknown was hardest.

Unknowns often turned into problems. The more he thought about his decision, the more it unsettled him. He could not go back on his decision. Heroes should not second guess themselves. Indecisiveness led to more victims.

It was time to go. He wandered through the side streets on his way out of town. It was time to move on and let things cool down in Oak Pointe. The police did not do a very good job at preventing villainy, but they knew how to locate dead bodies and try to find those responsible.

The dull, abiding anger built within him as he walked. He felt like justice remained undone. It rolled in him; a dull, smoldering fury in his solar plexus. Formed a pulse radiating to his fists, his thirst to spill guilty blood unslaked.

A crash of broken glass. Sounded close. He moved through the shadows of the alley past two fenced in back yards. In the third, he saw a shape. Clad in black, it was attempting to crawl through the window of a home with all the lights off.

Home invader? Appeared so. It seemed as if he would get a chance to visit justice upon someone after all.

Good. It always helped him work off pent up anger. Just restrain yourself, hero. Do not kill him. Unless, of course, he pulls a weapon on you.

The semester was over. Richard Broddicker was all packed and ready to go home. He did not bother taking his final exams. No final projects turned in. Keeping up grades, so important over the last several months, did not matter anymore. The only thing he wanted was to leave.

He looked at his cleaned out room one last time. Two beds, two desks, one sink. Everything stripped out. George, his roommate, finished the semester early and cleared out two weeks ago. Memories made there had been good. George was easy to get along with and they played in the same clan in Raid Force. They promised each other they would keep playing during the summer. Hopefully room together next semester. In a way, he was glad George left before Dr. Gilbert defiled him. It was best he not see him like that and no pleasant memories could erase it.

Never coming back. He was going to drop out of school and stay with his parents for a while. Figure out what to do next. Could he tell them what happened? Maybe. Probably not. He did not want his dad getting angry and stirring things up at school. There was nothing anyone could do. Dr. Gilbert was a powerful person. She would ruin his life if he stepped out of line. One did not go against someone like Dr. Gilbert. Her social media followers alone would tear him to shreds.

He may have to live with it, but he did not have to come back. All his belongings fit into two duffel bags. Laptop computer, clothes, chargers, swimsuit, the framed picture of Celine and himself at prom. It was getting late. He stuck around until he was sure most of the students were gone. He wanted to see as few people as possible on his way out. The last week, he rarely left his room. Whenever he was around others, he felt like they were staring at him. Like they knew what happened. Not just what happened, but that in the moment, he almost gave himself over to it. A shameful, violent moment he was too weak to fight off. He wished he had fought harder. Bit, kicked, clawed, did whatever it took to get away. Guilty; he wanted to feel like he did not just give up.

He was not lucky enough to avoid everyone. Clomping up the hall in his designer boots was Conrad. The pudgy guinea pig nearly bumped into Richard. He slid aside to give him a wide berth, but it was too late; he noticed him.

“Hey, Rich! Game bro!” Conrad smiled with widely spaced teeth and pushed his glasses up his muzzle. The thick lenses made his eyes look too big. “Heading home? Don’t wanna be the last out, right? Then you’re a rotten egg!”

“Uh… sure.” Now he was trapped. “Dad’s coming to get me….”

“Well, cool, cool. I’ll see you in the lobby. Gonna play so much Raid Force now that I’m not doing calculus proofs all day.”

Well, Conrad was in their clan too. He was pretty good. Richard did not feel like playing that game again any time soon. Memories.

“I… probably won’t be on for a while.”

“Well, I’ll see you next year, then? Hopefully we can be on the same floor again. Go Clan Solar Wind!” Conrad raised his paw for a high five.

“… I won’t be back next year.” Richard said.

“Huh?” Conrad lowered his paw. His smile died. “But… um… that’s not good. You’re smart. Not failing. Is it….”

“… It’s complicated.” Richard tried as hard as he could to hint he did not want to talk about it without hurting Conrad’s feelings.

“Oh… yeah. Well, guess I get it. Things were kinda weird this year.” Conrad walked with Richard as he made for the elevators. “I mean, you heard about what happened to Dr. Gilbert.”

Richard stopped walking. He froze up. Eyes wide. The name brought a flashback of that night. Hearing it out loud made his pulse quicken to sprinter levels. He said nothing.

Conrad, not noticing a single thing about Richard’s internal state, kept talking. “Yeah… they found her body in the chem building. Big mess. Some guy chopped off her head.” He leaned in, whispering conspiratorially. “… and I heard they cut off her dingaling too… blood everywhere.”

Richard stared. Brain locked up, processing the information but not sure what to do with it. “… what?”

“Yeah, yeah, big mess. Killed her. It was probably a hate crime or something. Cops thought it was that weird professor guy that just started teaching chemistry, but his wife was having a baby so he wasn’t there. So now they’re checking all over for who did it. Looking for anyone who might know anything.”

“… killed… her? She’s dead?” Richard tilted his head.

“Uh… yeah. That’s what I just said. Are you okay? I mean, it hit a lot of us pretty hard. The other professors are all scared and they’re saying we all get As for the semester because of it and stuff. Crazy… are you sure you’re okay?”

“Killed her…..” Do not smile. Do not laugh. Keep it together.

“Yeah… do you know something about it?”

Richard thought back to the huge, gray skinned monster who showed up at his room. The sable remembered him. That hideous face, his grim demeanor. The last thing he said to him when he asked what he was going to do.

You will see.

Richard suppressed the joy. He kept walking, but it was a fight to keep from breaking into a grin. He was a decent man, but not above feeling happy when someone killed his rapist. “No. I don’t know anything about it at all.”

Two months flew by. Having a new baby was busy enough, but there was a surprising amount of cleaning up to do after Dion found himself still among the living. The first thing he did the morning after his encounter with the gray monster was walk into Crawford’s human resources department and resign. No two weeks, no desire for letters of recommendation. Just cut ties. Human resources had lots of staff, but the one he saw was a rail thin, pink haired fox lady. She was surprisingly sympathetic, what with the murder of Dr. Gilbert. She thought they were friends, which made a wave of revulsion course through him so strongly he shuddered. Mistaking it for grief, she offered to console him with a hug. He just left.

This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.

After that, he called up Carston Community college. Doreen was still there and the first thing she asked was if he was settling in all right. She remembered him. Naturally, this led to talking about the baby, which she expressed supreme excitement about meeting. Small talk just flowed naturally, like he was talking to his grandmother again. An hour flew by before he finally asked for his old job back. The position was still open and they were eager to have him.

Then house shopping. Then moving. Then something he had been putting off for over a decade. He called his parents. They did not talk long, he just said he was coming home. He did not want to catch up over the phone. A week later, they were on their way.

“Are you sure you’re ready for this?” Liz asked. She reached over and put her paw on Dion’s thigh. Comforting touch, but not obtrusive enough to distract him from driving.

“I’m ready.” Dion replied as he turned onto a familiar street. It should be familiar; he grew up in this neighborhood. Despite the years, St. Ambrose had not changed at all. Some houses were in better repair, some worse. No new businesses. It was like the whole town was stuck in time. Probably why it was so attractive to the Izorian escapees.

He parked on the street, despite the driveway being empty. The same spot he always parked in before he left home. It ensured he did not block the driveway. Paw reached for the door handle and froze. Indecisive, he debated whether he really wanted to do this. How was Dion supposed to feel right now? Anxious, that much was given. Probably a little guilty, but that was expected. The odd, freely flowing sense of guilt that characterized his life was almost gone. He regretted not coming back to his parents sooner, that much was valid. He should have kept them in the know. Told them when he graduated college, married, had a child, nearly died. Did not even have to call them; he could have sent letters. People rarely did that anymore, but they would have loved it. Even though they were responsible for the burden of guilt he bore, he did not have to cut them out of his life.

All the more reason to reconnect with them now. Newly saved, he chose to honor his father and mother.

Liz’s paw went over his and gave it a squeeze. Comforting touch to compensate for his nerves. After being married for so many years, she knew what he felt when he felt it.

“I’ll be okay.” Dion stated before she could ask. “Just need to think of what to say.”

“Just say whatever comes to mind.” Liz replied. “They’ll understand no matter what you say.”

There was the confidence he needed. Must have inspired Phoebe too, because she woke up and started crying. A baby’s cry was enough to get both parents to look at her simultaneously.

Liz looked at her husband and chuckled. “I’ll see what she needs. You go on ahead.”

“Uh….” Dion almost wanted an excuse to delay, as unproductive as that would be. “You sure? I mean, I can…..”

“Way I see it, you can soften them up a bit before they meet me.” She got out of the car before Dion could argue. Looped around to the back seat to see if Phoebe was hungry, needed a change, bored, or all the above.

A baby took the only excuse he had left. Made delaying seem ridiculous.

The grass was spongy under his feet. Neatly mowed as his dad cared for the lawn. Dion wondered if his mother was still gardening and if the apricot tree in the backyard was still alive. Dad used to carve models of waterfowl out of wood, even though he never hunted. He just liked painting them and giving them away. He wondered if they still disliked sweets. Wondered if they still drove the same cars. Time away breeds endless questions that accumulate like debris in a dammed up river.

Halfway to the front door and his parents came out to greet him. Their appearance halted him momentarily. They had not changed a bit. Izorians aged slowly, so a decade was not much in the scheme of things. It further lent credence to the otherworldly notion that time froze when you left home.

Dion, meanwhile, changed quite a bit. When they met near the middle of the front yard, he felt their appraising glances probing him. The sensation that came with having his aura read, not that he had not done the same as soon they left the house. Not a word from him in years and he just shows up as if nothing happened. Awkward tension piled up like a mountain with a family full of natural awkwardness.

Quick, say something. “Uh, hi mom. Hi dad.” He smiled. “It’s… nice to be home.”

His mother did not say anything in response. She opted for the option moms went with whenever their worries over sons were so severe and protracted words could not express it. She hugged him.

Dion exhaled sharply. She squeezed him as though he would vanish if she let go. Did not matter how big one got; one was never above a mother’s love.

“Diomedes…..” No commanding tone in her voice. No scolding. He was not in trouble. “We missed you. I’m so glad you’re safe. We hadn’t heard from you for so long.”

“I… I know, mom.” Dion replied. He hugged her back. It did not look like she was going to let go any time soon. “Um… sorry. I should’ve, you know… written you or something but….”

“It’s okay. Doesn’t matter now. You’re home.” His mother replied. This was not going as poorly as 98 out of the 100 scenarios he mentally reviewed during the trip.

“… you’ve certainly filled out, though.” His dad pointed out. There it was. When he left home, he was 110 pounds lighter. It would have been 120 pounds, but he lost 10 of them over the last couple months. He was finally starting to put down the snack cakes.

“Yeah….” Embarrassed, Dion could make no excuses. “… I kind of lost track of it over the years.”

“Figures.” Dion’s father smirked. “I’ve read about what public schools and colleges consider food. I’m… surprised you’re as thin as you are.”

Was that a joke? It was close. Dion replied with a sympathy chuckle. That made his dad smile.

“I’ll make something healthy for supper.” His mother finally let him go. “You can tell us what you’ve been up to. We’ve been worried about you, praying every day that you’re okay.”

There was a little of that guilt. Making his parents worry. “I’ve been all right.” Dion said, but did not want to get into specifics on the front yard. Better deflect. “Um, are Hector and Jason here?”

“You just missed Hector.” Dion’s dad said. “He headed up to the church to help clean. Said he might be back later.”

Might be back? That was pretty good for Hector. He must have really missed Dion, otherwise he would have volunteered to do maintenance instead of just cleaning.

“And Jason?” Dion asked.

His mother and father were silent for a few seconds. Nervous shuffling.

“He said to stop by before you go home.” His father broke the silence.

“Oh…..” Dion was not sure what else to say to that.

“It’s… never been this bad.” His mother added. “Stopped coming to visit. Hasn’t left his house in three years.”

Some things did change. Sometimes, they got worse. He remembered the state Jason was in when he left. Despair and vice colored everything he did. In a way, all of them dealt with their guilt differently. Hector tried to numb it with virtue and Jason with degeneracy. Maybe Dion could help both?

“I’ll make sure to visit.” Dion would be sure to give Liz a rundown on what to expect first. Hopefully he would clean up a bit before he got there.

His parents were no longer looking at him. They were focused on his car. Dion knew what they were looking at before he turned his head. A brown and white rabbit walking up the lawn with a baby carrier in her paws. Smiling, friendly, eager to meet her mother and father-in-law. She took her place at Dion’s side.

Normally, Dion was not big on public displays of affection. He put his arm around her to let his parents know who she was. “Mom, Dad, this is Elizabeth, my wife.” Introducing her that way would never stop feeling right.

Dion’s biggest worry was his parents would fly into a rage at him marrying someone who was not an Izorian. Safety of the family, not inflicting their presences on others, things like that. He could not have been more stupid.

Despite all the guilt they carried, they could see how right they were for each other. When a man and woman came together, complementing each other so well, any parent would be happy for them.

“It’s wonderful to meet you.” His mother said, though she did not hug her. Neither of them would likely touch her, for fear she would be repulsed by their presence. The guilt could not compensate for that.

“Very nice to meet you.” His father added.

“Thank you.” Liz smiled. She offered a free paw for them to shake. She would have went in for a hug, but carrying a baby prevented that. His mother took up her offer first, then his father.

Both of them looked so happy. “And who’s…..” His father started as he looked at the bundle carried in Liz’s arms. His smile vanished, replaced by wide eyes and a jaw agape.

“Apollos, are you…..” His mother began before she saw it too.

No hiding their shock, but Dion knew it would happen. He prepared remarks for the eventuality. “And this is Phoebe, our daughter.”

Liz held up the baby carrier and moved the blankets. A smiling little skunk with violet hair and shimmering, amethyst eyes greeted them. She giggled and reached out her chubby little fingers towards the older skunks.

“She’s……” His mother found her words. “I… I assumed you’d adopted….”

“Izorian… did you…..” His father asked.

“No… she’s ours.” Liz answered.

“… it’s a miracle.” His father stated.

“It’s hope.” Dion continued. “For us. For all Izorians. The world out there may be dangerous, but we’re not hated. Most don’t even know who we are. We don’t have to hide away from the world. We don’t have to feel guilty about what our people did. Everyone’s moved on.”

“This is… a lot to take in.” His dad said.

“It is, but…..” Dion started.

“Can we talk inside?” Liz interrupted. “It’s getting a bit chilly and I want to get Phoebe out of the cold.”

“Of course.” His mother replied. With a smile, she added. “I’ll put some tea on.”

They went inside. Liz eager to see where Dion grew up, his parents excited to hear all about what they had been up to.

Dion told them… nearly everything. He left out the stuff about the gray man. It would be a bit much for his parents to take in. After all, a mage hunter like him with a long memory and experience killing Izorians was the exact thing they feared. Share the moment. A happy family, finally reconciled. There would be challenges to come, but let them come. Dion no longer had to face them alone.

Previous Chapter
Next Chapter