December nineteenth 2069 / 1st of Mid-Winter in the 412th year of the Golden Alliance .
While the world ended around them , the two armour clad figures walked down the main street , lost in conversation. A huge fiery boulder crashed into a nearby wooden building sending burning debris everywhere , as terrified villagers burst screaming out the door . Ice blasts from above struck buildings and people alike .A massive scorpion like creature barrelled into the throng , grabbing a frozen elf in its mandibles and attacking the others with its stinger .Gargoyles flew overhead . The towns guards were trying valiantly to stop the waves of invaders but with little hope. A platoon of goblins had set up a mortar gun and were firing wildly . In the far distance at Castle Varalac , a muffled voice boomed as armies made up of the eight major alliances laid siege to its obsidian gates. It was an awe inspiring scene for the ages , and the two friends were paying absolutely no attention to it.
“So what are your plans after the end of the world Mike?” said the smaller robe figure dressed in a blinding white vestment .
They continued their ramble down Alangarde village's central dirt road. Suddenly , to their left , a building collapsed rather spectacularly and the goblins shrieked and high fived each other. The dark skinned man in grey and gold shining plate armour nimbly moved to the left , as a jagged piece of rubble planted itself in the spot where he'd been , he continued walking without breaking stride.
“As of right now ,”said Mike ,the armoured warrior in his West Country burr ' “I'm not sure of the timetable . Definitely going to take it slow,I have a a few little little jobs that I haven't gotten around to in a while so may as well get them done, sort out a few little legal issues , take a few days to smell the flowers I guess , then ..probably get reborn and get the guild organised , you?”
The robed man laughed
'See... you've got the right idea , me , I'm jumping straight back on the horse , I mean I'm an addict ..and come on.... where else am I going to go!”
“Well there;'s ..I suppose you could.., I..yeah I guess knowing you Ted, you'll be first logged in '
The goblins.. seeing the two men close by decided to attack , three of them charged in with swords , while one , probably the healer , stayed back and started chanting .
“ So are you still going to be a priest then , or actually pick a good class?” said the knight , ignoring the screaming green blurs coming towards them.
Ted , paused and scratched his beard ' I dunno , I mean being a healer is basically like being the rhythm section of a band , I mean , we're not the guys out front getting all the glory , and the groupies , but the whole thing would collapse with out us..oh hang on a second , I've made a friend ' Seeing he was unarmoured , the largest Goblin had homed in on the priest.
The goblins had closed the distance with the men , and the biggest , the leader , jumped snarling at the priest while the two smaller mobs held a little back ,One had pulled what looked like a stick of dynamite from his bandolier .With a flick of the priests wrist and a muttered incantation , a glowing blue tinged barrier appeared around the two men . The goblin leader bounced off the shield , then tried to hack at it with his sword . This was ineffective as the weapon , and the arm holding it, were on the ground inside the bubble ,while the goblin was not , and all the he was was doing now was spraying black blood over the barrier and its cohorts . It gibbered and screamed , holding its stump. The priest gestured and the arm (minus the sword) flew through the glowing barrier and reattached to the stunned creature.
“Oh you big softy Ted “ said Mike .The smaller grenadier goblin had thrown his explosive at the barrier . “ Mike lifted his iron clad foot and stomped on the edge of the discarded swords hilt , it flew up in the air spinning end over end , he then deftly punched the flying blade , it knocked the bomb back at the leader , and then continued in a straight trajectory and punched through the two smaller goblins , impaling them like a shish kebab. The bomb landed at the feet of the stunned goblin leader before exploding killing him instantly. The last goblin stopped mid chant ,dropped his staff , and ran. All this had taken about 10 seconds at most.
"Show off!"
Mike kicked a goblin limb out of his way as they reached the end of the path and started towards a hilly area just outside the village.
He stretched his sword arm and said “see that's your problem , I know you're supposed to be holy but ..come on that was a bit wussy even for you'
“What ?, because I healed that low level mob? What's wrong with a little compassion? How was that wussy eh?”
“Well for a start he was trying to kill us , secondly he was , as well as being an NPC , so , you know , not actually real ..he was also a goblin , so even by NPC standards dumb as a brick, and lastly because you knew I was going to kill em all in about two seconds anyway...wussy!“ he laughed.
“Yeah I know , its not real ,but the locals have been getting a lot more realistic, and with the reboot they're supposed to be much more lifelike... anyway guys like me like to think of it as real , since ..you know ,I pretty much live here .... .or rather did” he said sadly .Trying to change the mood he grinned and said "Anyway you spend your life hitting things with your axe, and getting hit ,thats all you know man , you wouldnt know compassion if it hit you over the head , which you'd probably goad it into doing!"
Mike , put his sword away and the two started walking towards the end of the street. Fire continued to rain down. On a wall someone had scrawled “G.O.D. Is dead” More villagers ran screaming with wargs and demonic creatures chasing them , Mike , ignoring all this said .“See , I know why you really play a healer ….you keep opening your big mouth and insulting people , and its cheaper to be able to heal yourself after they've kicked the crap out of you than buying all those health potions”
As they were talking a colossal cheer could be heard to the west . The armies had broken through the castles defences .
“Anyone we know there ?”
Ted scratched his head , “ Malc I think , Johanna, Big Sam, Feralis , that new Ranger ..Tiny Sam , the rogue brothers ,Valaria probably. A lot of of the guys who aren't going on to the new server , One last final hurrah I guess”
A tiny figure flew up in the air , growing until it was maybe 60 or 70 feet high . The huge man , a giant in ebony armour and red trim , lifted a glowing black axe and brought it down on a trebuchet ,and as he gestured with his left hand green fire rained down on the invaders . A fleet of winged humans attacked him from the right , while several figures grew to giant size (although not half as big as the black knight) and attacked him from the other side.
“I mean we're losing a lot of the guild ,”
“People move on I guess, “said the knight ” I mean the likes of me and you live for this kind of stuff , but I guess a change is good, the people we lose, some of them will come back , and the guild will be there for them when they do , more importantly we'll be there for them“
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All the while siege machines hurled boulders at the giant and spells flew from the mob below at him.
As the two men watched, a set of slim leather clad hands snaked between them , and then linked arms with them , ..attached to the hands and arms was a tall elf woman ,and this woman appeared very very happy indeed.
With red hair ,green and brown leather armour and gold cloak , with a huge glowing longbow on her back ,she struck quite the figure.
“Evening gents” she said as the three walked arm in arm towards the hill.
“Hey Val , you not up at the castle , having a crack at the Nightmare Prince?”
She snorted, which in a regal looking elf is a bit unsettling.
“Nah ..seemed like a lot of effort for not much , I mean massive raids, they're as bad as music festivals , lots of camping in the mud , so much noise you're half deaf , local vendors ripping you with crazy prices for beer and supplies , and all you're probably going to come out of it with is some bad memories, crap loot and an STD”, she said.
“I didn't know festivals were that bad in the Real , “ Mike replied .
“You see I forget you're a young un' , not an old fogey like me and Ted here”, she nudged the priest and smiled , “ he knows what I'm talking about” ,
“Oh yeah ,' the priest replied looking off in the distance” back in the day..back in the 20th century I mean , I did Glastonbury in the old UK , Donnington, Rock am Ring in Holland , T in the Park , Rosgilde,Feile back home in Ireland , Hell! I even went to the 1999 version of Woodstock,which was OK ,at least until someone set fire to the toilet I was in anyway ..yeah ..I did my time “
“Oh the ninety nine version was nothing , you should have seen the original , nothing but mud , bad acid and freaked out hippies for miles ... it was glorious” Val said grinning.
“OK you win ..anyway that was a bit before my time” said the priest laughing.
“The original , in the 1960s? ..Wow! I forget how old you really are ...ow!”
Mike received a jab in the ribs from the elf.
“Hey” ,Val continued “Never comment on a ladies age ..although I ..“
“..am no damn lady!” finished the two guys laughing .
“ You can use the new start to get yourself a new catchphrase “ said Ted .
“But it suits me so well!' she said producing a scroll and muttering a few phrases , it burnt to ash , presently bottles of wine started to drop from the sky into the soft mud beside them “Drinks are on me, Bottoms up“ she said ,catching a bottle she pulled its cork with her teeth and draining it in one, She reached down and grabbed another, as the two men helped themselves. The three settled on a patch of grass and looked over the burning town and into the distance at the battle. The knight used a scroll and a large cooked chicken and a ham appeared , the priest cast a spell and some loaves appeared. They made sandwiches. They chatted . As apocalyptic picnics go it wasn't too bad .
A gargoyle flew over head .Laughing.,Mike knocked it off course by flinging his helmet at it , Ted threw some bread, Val , rolling her eyes ,somersaulted into the air unleashed a volley of throwing knives at it and landed with a slight , probably alcohol fueled wobble .The gargoyle exploded , littering the ground with plaster dust. She sat down and grabbed another drink.
The barrage in the distance continued ,after about twenty minutes the giant knight staggered back from a particularly powerful blow knocking part of the castle walls down and killing some of the attackers in the process. Then enraged , he thrust his arms forward , they became covered in molten lava , with two snarling dragons heads where his hands had been, He sprouted fiery wings and flew up into the air , dowsing the castle and the raiders in fire . Frantically some of the tiny figures , hydromancers, shot up a shield of water and ice over the raid , which instantly turned to steam as the flames hit. Up close it was epic , but even a few miles away on the hill it was pretty spectacular .
Val looked on “Oh old Nightmare's gone into phase two , they must be doing a lot of damage”she said.
“Yeah I'm still surprised you would have been there, representing the Black Forest ”
“What's the point ,the guys will be fine without me, I mean anything that drops from him is going to be destroyed within a few seconds once this place shuts down, ”
Ted stopped and looked at her
“ Hang on...you know that any of our big kills or legendary quests carry over to the new realm right? Killing the prince would probably get you something. .. I mean like a title , or a castle or I maybe a sparkling unicorn mount or something, its an incentive to stop the long-time players from going off to SteamAge or CrossTimes or Multiverse or any of the other 'Gates.”.
Val jumped up.
“Shit! .. wonder if there's still time to get in there “ She looked over at the battle in the distance “...nah , I'm half drunk as it is ,all I'd manage to do at this point is throw up on him,”.
Val had what sounded like a mostly American accent , but when she got excited it was possible to hear a hint of Eastern European .
She spat on the ground ,and picked up another bottle “Anyway, they sped the whole story chain up to tie it into the server close ..The top guild leaders suddenly were just given the God-Killing weapons instead having to quest for them.. a real deus ex machina ending if you ask me ..ha!”
She started laughing, while the too men looked ate her confused.
“Deus ex ..you know ' the thing they used to do in ancient plays to resolve all the loose ends ..
God of the Machine? ….Philistines!..if you'd had any classical schooling you'd know that was a real knee slapper..”
“Soooo?”Ted asked “ are you you sticking to what you know , or trying something different in the new world?, Me ,I'm staying with what I know ”gesturing to his robe and staff.
Val said “ I'm definitely changing , I'm sick of skulking around with a bunch of tree hugging archers”
“Really ?, not going to try and get the “Mistress of the Forest “ title again” said Mike
“No way , I always hated that title .. “Master of the Forest “ sounds you're in charge of the Forest
“Mistress of the Forest “sounds like the Forest is screwing you at weekends behind Mrs Forest back , and has you setup in a leafy apartment somewhere ..fuck that . I'm going to change”
Mike laughed , “You are possibly the only person I know has has ever seen it like that “ he said.
“Anyway even though none of you asked me “ he continued pretending to be offended ”I will of course seek the noble pursuit of the hero who distracts monsters and enjoys the gentle patter of their giant monster fists on his face like rain all while his friends heal him and zap them with spells,...although if I retrain I may align myself differently ”
Ted countered “Translation , you don't want to learn how to play a whole new class , so you're going to pick a tanking one , although maybe a Paladin or a Frost Knight to mix it up .Also ..you really love getting beat up by the bad guys you sicko , I'd recommend seeing a shrink , if it didn't make you such a good damn tank!! ”
As he said that the battle at the castle looked like it had turned , the giant was on his knees , and eight glowing figures appeared around him, casting blazing chains of different colours . It was too far away to hear properly but on the wind phrases like “too corrupted to continue” , “must restart “, “born anew” could be heard .The chains rose up , until he was hovering in the sky.
“Well” Ted said standing up looks like the gangs all here , there's my boss Solas “ he said saluting at the shining white robed giant in the distance who was shooting a beam of burning light into the screaming dark knight . “ and may I say as holy deity style gods go he's kind of a dick to work for ..yeah here we go Seranos, Cerenast , Baalos,Nephice, Circae .each of them are hitting him with their elemental magic.Yep here's your godess Junta weighing in now Mike .”
The massive armour clad goddess , spun her scales around and struck the Nightmare Price , he exploded out in a burst of multicoloured light , which then imploded.
Where he had been , a pillar of blinding light appeared , and started to grow from the centre gradually dissolving castle , raiders , gods and all.
A message appeared in the three figures view.
[ Realm shutdown will commence in 1 minute ]
[ We'd like to thank you for spending your time in GATES OF DOOM Online ]
[ …............................ see you on the other side! ]
“Well I guess the fat lady just sang ,” said Mike standing to attention , his arms behind his back , he started singing
“ Oh ..nearer my goddess to thee'.
The pillar kept increasing in size , pulling in creatures and people alike.
In one motion Val swept up Ted , bent him low like a forties matinee star , albeit a very forward thinking one , and kissed him , Ted though looking a bit surprised, kissed back . Mike rolled his eyes.
”Hey! End of the world “, she said when they surfaced “ it seemed appropriate”
“And you a married woman” laughed Ted ,
“...and you a man of the cloth “ countered Val ,
“AND in front of your boss” added Mike “ someone's going to get excommunicated “
The white pillar had absorbed the village now and was rapidly coming to the three friends
“ You know I'm not that kind of..”
[Server Disconnect]
{Game over}
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