As the time to lower the cart came, the elves on sewage duty called below for someone with an empty cart. ‘I get it, they use it as manure’
The elf that showed up had bandages around his head. ‘It’s that old bastard!? Bwahahahaha’ Dwyn could barely contain his laughter at having a second revenge.
The cart was rolled on the small wooden platform and they lifted it so that they could push the platform over the edge and lower it. When they pushed it over the edge the left side of the platform started to lower faster.
“Hey, what are you doing” The elf holding the right rope said. “You’re going to flip the whole thing!”
The now slightly panicking elf on the left replied “It’s not me, the damn thing is stretching!”
Before they could figure out what was going on the rope snapped and the old elf below had already gotten too close to see what the fuss is about. The small lift dropped the crap cart sideways and lost slack so both the elves that were holding it fell on their asses, and the crap rained on the shocked old man while the cart just slightly avoided him.
Dwyn was shaking with laughter ‘This is going on the internet, this is definitely going on the internet.’
The old man was screaming in rage, and the guards arguing about whose fault it is. ‘Best leave quickly’
You have gained a new stat “Sadism”
Sadism +1
‘wha… never mid.’
Dwyn quickly went back to the village hall and lower village to see a commotion around the old man. Most of the local wood elves were laughing at him, but keeping their distance. He would every now and then start jumping and stomping the ground and flailing with his arms out of frustration. Since he was covered in crap it went everywhere around him.
The old man yelling curses at the two above went back to his house to wash himself. Dwyn decided to follow. ‘He is after all a fun target for pranks’
After finding his house he then logged off in order to put that video on the internet. Turns out there was a whole ton of people posting stuff like that online, and that entertained him for the rest of that day.
He logged back in the next day right where he left off. ‘That guy isn’t here, so I could check out his house for something to sabotage’ But he didn’t find anything interesting and decided to follow the old elf again. The old guy was a farmer, and today he was removing various bugs from his field and placing them into a barrel.
‘I’ve seen those before. They put several of them on a cart and left the village with them. Why transport bugs? Oh, I could release them back on the field when he’s not here.’
Dwyn looked back to the old man ‘He he he, what’s the matter having a bad week. Well prepare for more sucker.’
Once the old man left for lunch, Dwyn touched the nearly full barrel and said “sabotage”.
Sabotage failed
‘Huh?’ “sabotage”
Sabotage failed
‘Shit, maybe I should use that sharp stone’
Barrel sabotaged successfully. At the bottom of the barrel there is now a small hole through which the insects inside can escape.
Sadism +1
‘Why do I keep getting sadism points for this?’
Dwyn watched at the massive number of bugs coming out of the barrel and backed off a few steps.
‘There must have been at least a few kilos of them inside. Eww.’
Deciding to run Dwyn turned around only to see a livid old elf aiming his bow and arrow at him.
“IF YOU MOVE SO MUCH AS A MUSCLE I’M TAKING ONE OF YOUR EYES, THEN I’LL SHOOT YOUR LEGS SO YOU CAN’T RUN!!”
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‘aw shit’
The old elf yelled until a few guards came. He explained the situation to them, and they took Dwyn to a cage that served as the villages’ prison.
‘Screw this I’m out’ Martin logged off and paced around his room ‘This sucks, first there’s nothing to do and now they want to imprison me. Well no chance. I’ll create a new character. But how would I do that. As soon as I get in the capsule, I’m in-game. I should check the forums.’
Once decided he surfed the web and found that deleting a character costs 500 dollars. Also, you need to get in contact with an official from royal road to do it. He had to ask his parents for money.
“Dad”
“Hm?”
“I want to delete my royal road character”
“Why? Is something wrong?” his father frowned
“No. It’s just that …. well I’m locked up in jail, and I don’t want to stay there for who knows how long”
~Sigh~ “Why are you in jail son?”
“No reason, just a few pranks. I didn’t hurt anyone” ‘Except for that time I injured the old elf, but that wasn’t on purpose’
“And you’re asking me because….”
“Well, deleting a character costs 500$....” His father had no noticeable change in expression, but his eyes suddenly went unfocused “And-to-create-a-new-one-I-need-to-get-rid-of-the-old-one” Martin finished in one breath.
“Martin, Martin, Martin,… silly Martin. NO!”
“But…”
“No.”
“But I…”
“No, Martin, you can’t run away from all your problems. You made this mess, deal with it. You can create a new character when you earn the 500$ yourself”
With his mouth imitating a fish a shocked Martin stood there for almost 10 seconds before angrily storming off to his room.
‘Shit, shit…shit. It’s not fair. Now I can’t have fun anywhere.’ In school he was joined by some prima donna kid that turned his nose up at anyone and everyone else. ‘He must have been bullied. Too bad we’re being recorded here.’ With that he was annoyed by the idea of going back to either place, but as tomorrow came he reluctantly went back to royal road.
“There you are” a guard said to him as soon as he logged in “Your trial’s ongoing in the village hall. Follow me and no funny business”
‘Like I’d want to fight someone twice my width while unarmed and cuffed’
There were around thirty wood elves surrounding him when he sat down in a single chair on the center of the hall. ‘The one in front looks important’ Dwyn thought just as that official looking elf stepped forward and announced.
“Your crimes have been proven beyond the hint of a doubt and a verdict has been reached while you were away” He said as he smiled “Though the damage you’ve done is minimal, we can’t exactly let you free can’t we?”
‘Can't you?’
His smile turned slightly predatory as he said “For the crime of ruining the crops of farmer Lomon you will have to work at the Welay village farms, until you’ve doubled the financial value of what you’ve destroyed. For the crime of destroying the manure lift and one cart, you will deliver the manure to all of the village farms as you work on them. For assaulting the elderly you will be forced to remove your current class, if you have one, and permanently take the class gardener.”
“What?” Dwyn asked uncomprehendingly “Why gardener? That makes no sense.”
“Because it might teach you patience and respect towards nature. Also the last time you were suggested farming you reacted violently and this is a less useful profession requiring similar amounts of patience.”
‘You bastard, you rotten-STOP SMIRKING!’ Controlling his face in order to appear civil Dwyn managed to croak one last question. “Could you please explain what the difference is in taking a class permanently, and ordinarily?”
“Of course, however it would be much faster for you to simply call out the status window and see for yourself. Now that this matter is settled, let us move on to the preparations for the upcoming *Spring food festival*”
Author's note: If my way of writing is difficult to follow, please explain why, cite the confusing parts, or just mention it(or complain about it). I'm trying to improve, and advice is always welcome.
P.S. Hope you enjoyed the chapter.