(she wakes up to the sound of nibbling)
..wha?
(and see's a rat eating the onion growing in front of her)
...hi there...(she grabs the rat)
rattus norvegicus
.......{rat+ human= ratman= friend= guard}....
........
change "rat" to "brown ratman" y/n
y
initiating editing
{bigger, bipedal, smart, tool using,capacity for gratitude, geneticly compatable with other rats}
(auther's note: the answer to if she knows what sex is, hint: listen to the bloodhound gang's "bad touch"..)
(it convulses in pain wile growing to the size of a f#$king cat, and it's front paws get bigger and grows a 5th digit, and it's bones shift to be more bipedal)
...must be easyer on newborns.
(it looks at itself, then her, it looks scaired)
[ratty]....
[I].....
[ratty]....
[I]...i am your god now.
[ratty](it flinches)
[I]..or would you perfer princess?
[ratty]..{what is this giant, even?}
[I]...(she hands it the up-sidedown onion plant)
onion dna obtained
spray eye irritants when cut or harmed
[ratty after grabing it, and eating some]{im listening.}
[I] be my first knight...behind my pet(presents the now better puppy thing)
[ratty]{tiny bark-beast! ..wait, tiny?...what is a knight?}
[I]...you. stay. with. me. and. keep. people. from. hurting. me.
[ratty]{...so, meal ticket, and only not biting you, got-it.}
[I]...i should give you vocal cords...oh, and bring others, and mate with them to make more rat-men.
[ratty]{JACK-POT!}
[I]......(hold's ratty's neck)
[ratty]*squeeekqkqkopit,imscaired*,(she lets go)what the fuck is wrong with you?-...wait, wha- i just...
[I]....live-long and procreate, sir rattigun!
[rattigun]...shuure....(scurries to make a line of whatever it is now.)
[I]...so this is my base of operation for the next 8 weeks or so
(auther's note, suprisingly, all the parts about multable partners and that little of time for a rat to be born and reach sexual maturaty are true.)
Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
(30min later)...*rrrrrrqqqqqqq*...hungry~~..
----------------------------------------
(back at the lab)
[former looks to a screan,wile wearing a biosuit to hide his..new features]..ummmm,....sir,...the subject has escaped..like...yesterday.
[the most menacing shadow you can think of is displayed oon the screen, with a ascairy ass voice].....you incompotent nincompoop, you have failed me for the fist, and last time...consider all your credentials, patants, history of acomplishments, and docterets, null and void.....goodbye.
[former head]but-but-but-but-but sir!..it wasn't my fult!
[scairy-ass-mofo] I DON'T CARE, excuses don't make up for the lack of results.
[formerhead]...(quietly with a strained throat)i did my best......
[mr satan's evil brother]your assets will be confiscated, and the project will be given to somone more compitent....your fired.
[former head]...okay...but...we can't get out of the bulding...send help.
[lawful evil]...no.(disconects)
...(the former head throws the head part onto the ground)..FUCK....(tears)..fuck....it took us all night to figure out what the keys spelled.
...i don't know what it did,..but we had the make a new alphabet to figure out the old one.
...now our first atemp at rescue failed...and now i lost my job.
..what do i tell the others?
......we still have electricity...so we can try again...and we have food..
so no one will have to eat each other for another.....year;with the acsess to the messhall we have
.....i almost feel like i deserved this, getting stuck in the bulding.
..now that it dousn't matter if we get out.
....was this malice, or mercy?
----------------------------------------
..well,..how should i find my way back here?....(hangs a large peice of cardbourd from a meta grate walkway)..that should help my identifie the alley.
(begins walking with her puppy, smelling for food)....{if i can find a place with fruits, i may be able to grow plants, but im pretty shure onions usualy don't grow like it did in front of me}
apple:42%
corn:12%
barley:52%
...ah...theese clothss are just messy.
(they see a convineance store, go in, she buys some beef jurky, unboiled sunflower seeds,dog food , an unbrella,chia seeds[{yes, those are edible, and good for you}], pine nuts,potato chips, a sewing kit, and a toy crown hat )
(as she begins to walk back, she sticks her finger in all of the packiging)
chia dna obtained
resiliant
sunflower dna obtained
phogtosynthisis
external seeds
pine dna obtained
shell:bark
cow dna colected:73%
bovine strength
potato dna collected62%
{yeah!}.....(she looks around seeing an almost empty street) ....omminus
(3 thugs suround her)
[I] (points)ENAMY ENCOUNTER!
[thug1].hay kid, you the one our freinds said you kicked there asses?
[I]...i don't know, i wasn't there when they told you...(eats a peice of jerky)
[thug2]......smart-ass little.
[thug3]..well you don't look like much.
[drugedup person across the streat]MORE CHAINSAWS FOR THE SCIENCE GOD!
[thug1]....come with us little girl.
[I] nah, im going back to my alley to grow things and wait for my rat friend.
(they have no responce for that)
[thug2] that wasn't a request.
[I] and mine wasn't an excuse.
(thug 2 tries to pick her up, but she is stronger than she looks, and dislocates the guy's shoulder)
[thug1]holy, this kid is legit(they pull out wepons as 2 more apear)
(she throws her bag to the wolf pup and begins blocking the blunt instrements with bark covered forearms, dodges the knife, andeven managing to knock it out of the weilder's hand and into her's)
[I] thanks for the knife, this'll come in handy.
(dodging more)
{this seems quite a efishiant means of overwelming an oponent with numbers}
trait: pack tactic lerned
{....i just thought of somthing...i should give my cub pet some of these, to help me,.. musta fiorgot it could be usful when i was carrying it, right now it's hiding with the bag.}
(she kicks one of there leg's backwards, grab's tthere wepon, use that one to break another's kneecap, throwing that one at the next, and sleeper holds the last one untill unconshios,wile the remaining one gets up)
[remaining thug] what kinda kungfu shit was THAT!....im outie(puts empty hands up and turns to leave) PEA-ICE!
[I] okay, bye~~!....{i realy need guards, i don't want more of them coming for me, 50to1;....i should heal these guys...but how?......}
OH
...(she puts her hands on there broken parts, and they heal, and set)
..yaaa~y
{i just speculatedf i could use the virus trait to put a bit of myself in them, have them heal, then comand the cells to initiate apoptosis after the job is done}
(the one who is still consios staring in amazment, speachless, and paralized)
[I]...don't follow me....(leaves them behind walking next to her pet)
(at there ""base"" a bearded man is waiting)
[???] howdy!