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Frat Romance
A Balanced Diet

A Balanced Diet

After being shot down by the cougar librarian, I collected my things in my hands, threw them in my bookbag over one shoulder. My hunt will continue somewhere else.

Where, oh where, could I find a suitable mate? I thought walking through campus back to the frat house. Maybe the Juice bar? There are always cute girls that want to mingle. What about the campus center? That place has to be crawling with chicks.

Lost in thought, I kicked a piece of sidewalk, causing me to stumble forward, sending my things to fly in different directions. I could hear laughter from the bench next to me as I ate the cement.

Sitting on the bench was a girl. She was laughing so hard; she was in fetal position on the bench. Half-embarrassed, I picked up my things.

Finally calming down, she said, "You alright there, hotshot?", sitting up and wiping the tears from her eyes. As we made eye contact, I noticed how beautiful her eyes were. They were a vibrant hazel. If I looked any deeper, I would get lost in her green and gold eyes. Her hair was as black as the midnight sky. She wore all black and had jewelry on her wrist and piercings in her ears and bottom lip. She continued, “How does that cement taste? It looks like you ate a good amount of it.”

Hiding my embarrassment, I responded, “I’m shocked you were never told cement is one of the most nutritious things you can eat. Didn’t your parents tell you some cement a day keeps the doctor away?”

“No, I’ve never heard of this! My parents must hate me,” the girl said. As she laughed, she got off the bench to help me pick up my things. “So, where you headed, tiger?”

Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

“I’m off to spread the good news, of course. After my conversation with you, I realized people are not getting enough of their essential daily minerals.” That remark sent her into a laughing fit. With a smirk I continued, “I actually have to get ready for tonight’s formal. Will you be there?”

“I would, but I’ve got no date; if only there were a hot, intelligent guy around that knows the importance of having the proper amount of minerals in their diet.” Bella winked at me.

“Well, you’re in luck. I know a guy. Let me get him.” I did a small spin on my heal and then offered my hand for a handshake. “Hi, I’m Ron. Want to go to the formal tonight?”

Straightening herself on the bench, she shook my hand and said, “I’m Bella, and I’d be honored to go with you to the formal tonight.”

We exchanged numbers and then I left to head back to the frat house.

Inside the frat house, brothers filled the entire downstairs. One brother came up to me and handed me a shot. “Yo, try this. It tastes as if a Peppermint Pattie exploded in your mouth.” Peppermint being my weakness, I didn’t hesitate to take the shot. The overwhelming amount of peppermint smothered my taste buds.

"Forget mints. I am taking a shot of this to cure my bad breath!" The entire room roared with laughter. "Alright, gentlemen, I'm going to powder my nose. When I am finished, let the Pregame Olympics begin!" cheers filled the room as I went upstairs.

When I got back to my room, I noticed my bed was in its original position, and the pledges even made the bed. Laying on the pillows there was a note sitting on top. Putting my stuff down, I grabbed the letter. "Hey Ron, I know we left on bad terms this morning. But I want to make things right. I promise I’ve given up on my fishy ways and want you to show me what it is like to be a land dweller. Find me at the dance and we can start things fresh and elope together. Love Sarah." Sarah left a lipstick imprint where she had kissed the letter.

This is good news, so if things didn't work out with Bella, I could always give Sarah another chance. If there was one thing that college has taught me, it’s always have a backup plan. I grabbed my suit and got dressed for the dance.