Over and over, the situation played out in her head like a loop, with a different ending each time. How much different would things have gone had she just landed one more hit on him? Had she dodged more of his shots? If she had figured out when he used decoys earlier? If she had been just a bit more resistant to the powder? Shiver was obsessed with her last battle for reasons she could not understand, with a special affixation on her very last moments awake. She thought about how she could have countered his surprise attack as soon as he had placed his hand on her back. She ran it through her head time and time again in vivid detail, her moves changing each time. First she would whip his face with her ice covered tail, leaving a gruesome lash on his face that would have staggered him. She then would have followed up with a haymaker to his gut, causing him to double over. She would then grab him by the hair and bring her knee to his face, disorienting him entirely if not outright knocking him out. The opportunity to go for the kill would present itself to her as she lunged at him and grabbed him by the throat, crushing his neck under her enhanced strength with ease. She would watch the life fade from his eyes as she squeezed more and more, her vision going red as a smile would creep across her face until finally…

*CRUNCH*

Her eyes shot open as she jolted awake, breathing fast and heavy.

*crunch*

Looking around, she found herself in the dimly lit cabin of the truck that Hypo had left in, cuffed up and locked into her leaned back seat with a belt.

*crunch*

She realized the crunching had been coming from the treads running over particular hard piles of snow as it traveled along. She turned around in her seat and discovered a windowed sliding door stood between the inside of the truck and the cargo bed outside. Peering further, she saw the boy still resting on the mattress, even in the dark of the night, as the moon provided just enough light to identify him. She faced forward once more and slowly relaxed, staring at her hands as she opened and closed them.

“...Were those my thoughts…or the demon’s…?” She thought to herself. “...After all this time, I really have lost my skills. All it took was a small surplus of power and it was able to overpower me and take control…or maybe it was always in control, and just waiting for me to lower my guard.”

On the dashboard inside the cabin was Iggy, connected to the center console of the vehicle by a large thick wire running from his back, controlling the truck while the boy rested. As soon as he noticed Shiver had awoken, he gave a single short hoot. Moments later and in no rush at all, Hypo rose from the mattress and entered inside, a quick gust of wind and snow tagging along before he sat down in the driver's seat. Silently, he dusted the snow off himself and then reached to the side of his door and pulled up a canteen and drank from it. He then pulled out his dart gun, and laid on his lap.

“...Just in case you lunge at me again.” He said, looking straight ahead at the road.

She eyed the weapon, then him. “Is this out of precaution, or is he actually scared I might try and kill him again? I can feel these cuffs sapping my energy and this belt is tough. How much more does he need?” She wondered.

“...Y’know, staring at me like that isn’t helping me feel any worse about pulling the gun out.”

She kept her gaze on him, her face unchanging. This garnered a reaction out of the boy as he slowly turned towards her, bewildered.

“Damn. Really? Really? Ok, I get it. Big bad Shiver is a stone cold killer, she likes it when everyone is scared of her.”

“...Why aren’t you using a real gun?”

“Huh? Wh-don’t you remember what happened yesterday?”

“I do, though at points it was a dark blur.”

“Then you know that I’m not going to try and piss you off with real bullets!”

“You should know by now that the strength I gain from being hurt only activates when I’m wielding the Frozen Rage.”

“Oh, uh right. I forgot a bit…still, I’m not using an actual gun on you. I’d prefer not hurting you. Guessing the same doesn’t go for you, huh?”

“...You talk too much. It’s giving me a headache.”

“You know what else is a real headache? Being in charge of you. Because you’re nuts. A crazy murderer who slaughtered nine of her former comrades, royal guardsmen that you fought alongside with, and I was almost the tenth.”

Her gaze sharpened as he spoke, dark thoughts crossing her mind.

“I only survived because you weren’t even in control of your own power. You let that demon take over your body, and treated you like a tool the whole time. All because you forgot how to handle your own weapon after being separated from it for so long. In fact, I bet you're still struggling. You want to kill me, even as I speak. So…how would you feel if I told you I have a solution in this book of mine. A way to stop the visions and voices.”

Shiver had been glaring at him for the most part while he talked, but her mood shifted to a concerned realization as soon as she heard him finish his sentence.

“I knew it…how long have you been seeing them?”

She found herself staring at him, thinking herself into a spiraling thought process.

“I could tell him I did…but then what? He’s only a boy. There’s no way he has the ability to fix me. He’ll just use some worthless meds to try and calm me down, only to find it doesn’t work. I’ll just lose it again and try to kill him. Actually…who’s to say he doesn’t know that already? I was trying to murder him a day ago and dreaming about strangling him ten minutes ago. I can tell he wants to get rid of me. He’s a deceitful little bastard, too scared to even be near me without his gun, even as I’m locked up like this. I know exactly what he’ll do. He has that owl waiting and recording. The second I confess, he’ll put me under and tell the Queen herself my exact words so that she can freeze me over again. He’d get away with it too. Everyone in this damn kingdom already thinks I’m a psychopath. They wouldn’t even ask for proof. I can't trust him. In fact…who’s to say he won’t betray me, whether I tell him the truth or not? I can tell he’s already made the report of me trying to kill him. I’m done for, regardless.” She concluded, her eyes growing intense once more as she looked around the area outside. “...But…if I escape now, I won’t have to face the dungeons ever again. If I can just get out of these cuffs, I can regain control of my wings and fly off for good…If I kill him, there won’t be anyone to report my escape. I have to kill him now, before he gets me killed. I want to live. I want to be fr-”

“Shiver?”

She snapped back to reality upon realizing she had worked herself into a mental fervor.

“...I lost my train of thought. I’m still tired from all the fighting yesterday. I want to sleep.” She said coldly, shutting her eyes and resting her head back.

“I’m serious. I told you once already, I know a lot about that demon you’re stuck with. I can help you.”

This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.

Slowly she opened up her eyes, and sat up. This time though, she looked fatigued.

“...There’s no point in hiding it. I already know there isn’t a chance for me to actually escape this place.” She murmured, before glancing over to him. “I’ll answer your question, but first…I want you to answer mine.”

“What do you want to know?” The boy asked cautiously, though still somewhat interested in Shiver’s sudden change in mood.

“...Who are you? What history do you have with my blade that has it hell bent on seeing you dead?”

Hypo seemed intrigued at this question, but then his face relaxed and a small, reminiscent smile took over.

“It all started with my brother, Eli…but you know him as Elitherm, the Saint.”

Shiver’s eyes opened a bit in surprise, taken aback when she heard the name uttered from the boy’s mouth. “Your brother was the Saint…? Even us in the King’s royal guard heard stories of his actions…we all knew him as a prodigy who saved the lives of hundreds in his career. He was even on the list of candidates to be promoted to the elite ranks just before the war was lost, but it never went through. How did he end up in possession of my blade?”

“Well to put it short, he never really stopped being a medic. Sure the war ended and the main parts of our homeland were rifted out, but he stuck around to train those who would fill his role in the future, including me. Eventually one of the remaining royal knights who hadn’t abandoned the Queen after our downfall took notice of Eli and brought him to the Queen. She immediately promoted him and placed him among the ranks of all the other elites just like you. A few weeks later after we finished celebrating, he got word that he was being sent to do what he did best on an operation to capture one of the King’s finest. One that predictions said would cost heavy casualties.”

“Me…”

“That’s right. You remember that day, I’m guessing?”

“...I killed many. People I used to call friends. People who once thought I would be an eternal defender of our lands. People who had more faith than I did.” She murmured, staring wistfully at the floor, before a sort of realization hit her. She turned to him hesitantly, her eyes taking a second to meet his. “Did I…did I kill your brother?”

“So she really can be considerate…” Hypo thought, looking genuinely astonished for a moment before he grinned awkwardly.

“You didn’t. Truth is, while ‘the Saint’ was second to none as a healer, Eli was just a plain amateur in terms of combat skills. He knew better than anyone to hang back and heal from a smart distance, so he actually never got close to you except for one crucial moment. He told me that no matter how wounded you were, you just refused to stay down for more than a few seconds. It was during one of those times that he rushed at you and used his sedation ability, knocking you out entirely and getting that sword away from you.”

“So that’s what happened…”

“After that, he was told by the captain to hold onto it, so he did. For a good bit, he just left it in our storage, locked up and everything, while he went on missions every week or so. But one day after one of those operations, he came back different. He pulled the weapon out of storage and started studying it like crazy. Day, night, and every chance in between. He stopped his training sessions with everyone except me, and eventually he started teaching me about the sword.” Hypo revealed. As he continued with the story, his mood slowly shifted from calm to serious, the look on his face becoming minorly distressed. “He started keeping a personal journal of it, filling at least a hundred pages in it. I could even hear him talking to it at times. Eventually, he started taking it with him on missions, telling me he was testing things to unlock a higher potential for us…it was during one of those secret missions that he died. They never told me the cause of death…and just like that, I was all that was left. All the secrets he had known had gone with him, leaving only his notebook behind. So I read. And I learned. And I understood. The demon knows that much. That’s why it wants me dead.”

“...I’m sorry for your loss. I didn’t realize I would pry that far into your history.”

Shiver’s apology seemed to have a genuine impact on him as he was left a little taken aback and speechless for a moment, a look of somewhat understanding on his face.

“Thanks, Shiver.” He said, a slight smile across his face. “...Now I told you my story. So it’s time I hear your answer.”

She took a deep breath before speaking, a tense look in eyes that kept darting away from the boy’s gaze.

“...Yes. Ever since you knocked me out yesterday, I’ve had nothing but violent thoughts. Violent dreams even. Everything in my head keeps telling me to kill you. It tells me to strangle you, to stab you, break your neck, crush your head, cut you open, anything to make you bleed, it wants…it’s…wearing on me. I don’t know what to do…I need help.”

Upon hearing her dilemma, Hypo pondered on her words for a second. He then reached inside his coat and pulled out the journal. He opened it up and flipped only about two pages before stopping and reading. After a bit, he quietly criss-crossed his legs and placed the book open in his lap where he could look down and read it, then held up both of his hands. He closed his eyes and went into focus, his brow furrowing as he seemed to grip the air itself. Moments later, glowing light orange halos of energy appeared in his hands, and he opened his eyes and inspected his conjured magic to his own satisfaction. Giving his owl a nod, the book disappeared from his lap in a beam of light and he stood up.

“Do you trust me?”

“What are you going to do?”

“What my brother taught me and what I’ve learned. This is my first time ever using these techniques, but I’m confident.”

“Then there’s only one choice for me. Do what you need to do.”

“Then for this next bit, I need you to maintain eye contact with me. I’m gonna try and…seal your violent thoughts. I dunno, it’s more complicated than that but it’s like the best way I could describe it.”

He then walked up to her and knelt down with both knees, then placed his hands on both sides of her head while staring hard into her eyes. Instantly her mind went blank, forgetting where she even was and unable to grasp the effort the boy was going through as a fierce look sat upon his face. While Shiver was entirely oblivious to the situation at hand, Hypo was being subjected to constant visions of himself being murdered in gruesome ways, sweat running down his face while he tried to stop himself from looking unnerved.

“...Can’t…lose…focus…I can’t…or else…this fails…” He seethed through clenched teeth. His gaze was now entirely centered on Shiver’s nonchalant eyes, the whole world going black except for the two hellborn pupils before him. Being blind to anything past the woman’s gaze, he was unable to see that steam began to come off of his hands as he used up a massive amount of energy. He longer saw the gory visions, they continued to play out in his head over and over, wearing him down. Eventually though, the sounds he heard began to quiet down until they went entirely silent. His vision gradually returned and everything around him came back into view. He released his grasp on Shiver and stumbled back from her, his hands now shaking a considerable amount. She instantly returned to consciousness as she looked around to see what happened, only to see him sitting in his chair breathing heavily, his face a mix of fear and dismay.

“Shiver…I messed up…I really messed up…all that stuff was in my head for a few seconds…” He mumbled, staring hard at the floor. With a quivering hand, he slowly reached for the door and opened it up. He slowly turned and stumbled out of the truck and into the snow, falling to his knees and holding himself up with his hands. He took deep breaths, his face shaken with fear and weariness. For a minute he remained that way, eventually swallowing his dread and weakly rising back to his feet. He climbed back into the vehicle quietly and shut the door, then rested back in his seat, his eyes glued to his hands resting in his lap.

“...Shiver…were you seeing…all that stuff this whole time…?” He asked in a voice so quiet it was almost a whisper, his weary gaze unchanging.

“Yes…these sorts of visions, I’ve learned to just live with them. Eventually it all became white noise that was just there, and nothing more. It was only when I unleashed the full power of my weapon that they became harder to ignore. When you defeated us yesterday, that’s when it had gotten to a point I have never seen before, like I had brushed against Hell itself.”

“Unreal…anyone would have gone crazy seeing stuff like that literally every second of the day…how was she able to even manage staying sane? Is it because she’s also a demon…or because she’s just used to violence?” Hypo thought.

“And…what about now?” He asked, now giving her a careful side glance.

“...They’re gone for now.” She said, her gaze still cold, but now with a relaxed tone to it. “I can’t say for sure this is the end of it, but for now…you’ve helped me. Thank you.”

“Pretty decent for my first run…can’t say it was a complete success if I’m being honest.” The boy said with an exhausted smirk as he sat back in his seat and laid it back. “No way I’m gonna try something like this again though, not for a while, so…try not to use that thing all too much anymore, ok? Now if you don’t mind…I’m tired.”

“I’ll try. I can’t tell what the future holds for me.” She mumbled, watching as he fell fast asleep. A faint smile crossed her face as she observed him. “If nothing else…I can at least trust him to keep his word as a healer. He really does take after the Saint.” She whispered to herself, before her smile faded. “Still…saint or not, he’s still my warden. My fate is in his hands, for better or for worse. All I can do now is wait for the next day to come.”

With that, she shut her eyes and drifted off, knowing she would finally have a peaceful rest.