Now that the humans left I can talk freely again.
And there is one particular thing I have to ask Liseti.
So I move over to her and state it.
We can never take this back.
It might become a risk for us.
A cold shiver runs down my back.
I'm not sure if Olira should hear about this.
She says this as a matter of fact.
As if there’s nothing to discuss.
However, I can’t leave it at this.
Am I so far below her in her esteem?
What does she mean?
The way she's saying this it might be about something concrete.
I’m seriously stunned.
How does she even come to this?
My brood are kinda my children.
It would feel wrong to do this to one of them.
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I stare in shock.
Does she mean I’d be crammed up in a similar way like those poor worms?
(L)
She’s right.
I was fine with drinking the nectar while avoiding any thoughts about the source.
But it’s still from them and in the end, I make use of the nectar units.
The same goes for the scholars.
Having my own would ensure where the knowledge comes from.
Formicea may not lie, but they could deny a request and my own wouldn't.
Yet I’m still so unsure.
And with this, she leaves.
Liseti didn’t say any of this in a haughty manner.
Behind her statement was a hint in the pheromones that she wants me to be able to take care of myself.
To be independent.
Could this have been her intention all along?
With a heavy mind, I return back to my home.
For quite a while I muse over what Liseti said.
Kyska can’t ignore this and addresses me.
She was present?
How didn’t I notice?
The most important point is, that I still drink it and can’t see myself completely stopping from doing so if it's really substituting for so much food.
I’d be a hypocrite if I would continue using others without taking responsibility for my actions.
There are even citizens who never killed any livestock but still eat flesh.
Living on a farm I knew perfectly well what that entailed.
Sure.
With this instruction, I try to do so.
I think about the pattern of a scholar and that I want to produce one.
Directly I notice something.
There is a slight shift in my waist and instinctively I know it happens now.
Having successfully solved this task I proceed with the nectar unit.
I think about the pattern and form the intention.
But nothing happens.
There's no shift and I am absolutely sure it didn’t work.
To be honest, I know what was missing.
I didn’t really wish for it.
I have such strong aversions to make one that I simply can’t.
Yes, what is the issue?
The issue is that it’s not simply livestock.
It’s my brood.
My children.
And nectar units are only cattle.
This is no life one wishes for their children.
Yes, she might be right about this. That they’re this simple. But it’s not like a mother wishes for their children to be as dumb as a cow. Even if it makes them accept this kind of life. Making them smarter wouldn’t work out. I can’t see them being scholars and at the same time cows. I know that Kyska is also right. To a great degree, I’m using the wrong standards. Just coming from the perspective of a nectar unit, it shouldn’t be too bad of a life. And if they’re against this I wouldn’t force them. Kyska and Liseti both have a point. She basically means if I drink their milk, which is weird. Nonetheless, I get it. If no one is harmed and everyone is happy it’s just about me and my aversions. So I start once more the attempt on inducing this specific production. It would be too much to say that I’m absolutely fine with everything. Nonetheless, I feel a bit more convinced. With my now much clearer mind, I think about the nectar unit. Next, I think that I want to make one. And then I feel a shift inside my waist. Hello, little nectar unit.