It was already really dark by the time I finished up at the market, and I headed back to Graman’s house like he had said when I felt something hard wrap around my leg. When I say hard, I mean tough, sort of like rock, and I was quickly hoisted into the air and dragged away from the house.

I consider myself to be fairly calm, but I admit that everyone has a limit. I was able to handle the dying and waking up over and over again, but it was now the middle of the night, and if I feel something grab my ankle? Of course I’m going to panic. Going by horror movie logic, that typically means I’m being attacked by a sadistic monster or something.

“What the hell is-“ I cut myself off as I see what picked me up. A snake. What was left of one, at least. It was a long skeleton, and the body looked like it was made of human rib cages.”Ah! No, fuck, fuck- let go of me damn it!”

The skeleton didn’t listen, instead carrying me off into the forest, muffling my screams despite having no flesh to do that with, and I saw a cabin, lights rapidly turning on as a man rushed out the door, looking between me and the snake. “I said get his attention, not kidnap him!”

The snake shook its tail and snapped its jaw a few times. “Of course there’s a difference. I told you that the first time, now put him down!” The snake shook as it dropped me, and I fell flat on my ass for the second time that week. I looked at him cautiously.

“Who are you?” I asked as I reached for a stick.

“Calm down, I’m not going to hurt you. The constructs have trouble with basic commands it seems.” The snake rattled. “Well I’m sorry, but you are a construct, even if you were raised from the dead.” It slithered underneath the cabin, leaving me and the man out in the open.

I finally got a good look at him, now that I wasn’t panicking, and he looked, and was, odd. He was… eccentric, if I wanted to be generous, but not like the guy in blue, Hale, who acted like a caricature of a nobleman. This man was more in the sense of ‘I haven’t spoken to people in a while.’ He had brown hair with blonde tips that were tinged green like he’d been in a pool, if that pool had a significantly higher chlorine content than usual and food coloring in it. His skin was the color of wheat bread, as odd as that sounds, and his eyes were two different colors, one brown and the other gray.

“Who are you?” I said more calmly, having regained my bearings.

He held out his hand, stained with bright liquids that seemed to glow in the moonlight. “Reid Marshall, cleric and amateur alchemist. Who are you then?”

“David Miller, uh…cook, I guess?” I took his hand as he helped me up, and I remembered what he yelled at the snake about. “You wanted to talk to me or something?”

“Yes, because I have to ask: how are you still alive?”

————————————————————————————————————————

He led me inside the cabin, and I looked around, taking in the somewhat stale air. “What do you mean? Am I supposed to be dead?”

He frowned. “Yes, by all accounts, you are supposed to be dead. I can see your past injuries and your bones should be dust. Your flesh would be a fine paste by now. So, again: how are you alive?” He poured out some red liquid into two cups, shoving one in my hand. “Tea.”

“Thank you. You want the long story or the short one?”

“Whichever. I just need to know.”

“I died in a previous life, reincarnated several times, and now I’m here.”

Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.

…

“At least it was an explanation.” Reid sighed as he took a long drink from the cup and rubbed his eyes. “That’s…it shouldn’t be possible, unless you had a god to save you, but I can’t feel an ounce of faith from you, so…” The snake skeleton crawled up from a floorboard, and I moved away from it as it curled up next to Reid. He looked down at it as it clacked, and he huffed. “I haven’t wanted to test anything in years and now I want to dissect you.”

I moved a bit further away. “Don’t be like that,” he muttered. “I’m not going to kill you, I just want to figure out how you’re still alive. Are you ready to go now?”

“Yes,” I said with absolutely no hesitation.

The snake picked me up again and carried me out as Reid sat in his chair, waving as he seemed to contemplate something.

I didn’t panic this time as the snake carried me. “Can you understand me? Like, actually understand what I’m saying?”

A rattle.

“Yeah, that won’t work. Uh, snap your jaw once for yes and twice for no. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

One snap.

“Alright. Are you…were you created or resurrected? He mentioned that you were a construct, but-”

It rattled, shaking me as it snapped twice. “Fine, not a construct! Testy, aren’t you?” I wiggled a bit, trying to get comfortable before I noticed I was slipping. “Did he- Reid, did he create you?” I saw its jaw open, but it hesitated this time before snapping once. “So he’s a necromancer.” It snapped, and I would’ve asked more questions if it hadn’t dropped me on my head.

As it slithered off into the night, I got to my feet and turned towards the house, seeing the door open with Graman frowning at the monster that had just dropped me. “What was that?”

“Something I don’t want to explain right now. Can I go to bed?”

He frowned at me but stepped to the side so I could walk in. “You’re telling me what happened tomorrow.”

————————————————————————————————————————

“So…you not only reincarnated, but you died how many times again?” Graman sat on the couch in front of where I stood, staring me in the face.

“Eight, I think. I broke my spine when I fell from the sky and landed here.” I shifted my standing position as I tried to get a read on him. “You alright?”

“It’s a bit of a shock, but not the weirdest thing I’ve heard of. Reincarnation is a fairly common way of people getting here, actually. It’s only humans though…” His gaze seemed like he was trying to look at small text on a distant billboard before he shook his head, refocusing. “Sorry. Lost my train of thought, but like I said, it’s not the strangest thing I’ve heard. You should be fine to tell more people at least, and you won’t get in trouble for not knowing traditions.

“If you are really a reincarnator though,” he said as he rose to his feet and walked out of the door, “I suggest you find your place here, because none of the ones like you have been able to go back.”

With that, the orc walked out and left me standing in the living room.

Find a place here? What the hell does that mean? I figured I couldn’t go back, but what the hell does he mean by “find my place here?”

I wasn’t stupid. I could gather he meant it like find something to do, but this is fucking magic world. What service can I provide that adventurers can’t? I paced for a bit before the smell of cinnamon hit my nose and a voice in the back of my head spoke up. ‘You can cook,’ it said, and it was right! Who in their right mind would try cooking in a life or death situation, let alone when you need to get from one place to the next fast? It’s better to prepare it beforehand or buy the food, and everyone hates meal prep. They would buy the food, and I had all sorts of recipes!

I practically ran out of the door and talked to a bunch of strangers until I got the directions to the guild hall, and I made my way over there, grinning like a mad man.

I burst through the entrance, startling a tall guy who had slightly pointed ears and hair the color of Nutella, who happened to be talking with the guildmaster.

“I have an idea!”

He frowned at me as the tall guy backed up a bit before stopping. “What, uh, what is it David?”

“I’m opening a restaurant!”

He frowned even deeper. “That’s…certainly a concept, but how do you intend to do that? You need property, funds, equipment, and gods know what else. Despite how familiar you act with everyone, you only arrived here maybe three days ago, and we’ve known you for two. The banks and guild are very reluctant to give loans to people who have a blank slate in terms of history, and the only way to get around it would be to show skill and have yourself tested.”

It was my turn to frown. “Testing?”

Hale nodded. “Besides basic education, you would have to get licensed as an adventurer via tests of certain traits and displays of skill with certain things. Then, you could maybe open your…restaurant.”

The tall guy looked between us. “What are you talking about?” He shifted in his armor, clanking audibly. “Hale, what is he talking about and who is he?”

”He’s a man that Aran and Graman found outside in the forest unconscious, and he says he fell out of the sky. Do you…do you have a solution, Garret?”

The man, now who I knew as Garret, rubbed his eyes, frowning confusedly. “I…I guess? He needs to be certified if he isn’t already though so…” He trailed off. “I have work today now. Come on, whatever your name is. You’re getting an adventurer’s guild membership.”

He dragged me off, and that was the fourth time that week that it happened.