*Huff* *Huff*

I feel my heart beating and it’s hard to breathe. My hands are shaking endlessly and my vision is full of red dots.

I never expected that after so many years I would still have problems with this damn body of mine, I’m so totally replacing all the useless parts after I’m done.

‘Relax, relax, don’t be nervous. I’m sure it’s okay, everything will be alright, no need to worry. We’ve been through worse, right?’

I try telling myself but the feeling of dread won’t go away.

I jump a whole hundred meters up in the air and put my all into the magic tools on my wrists to destroy the grey stone wall. I’ll apologize to her later, right now the situation is a bit too serious.

*Boom*

The wall falls apart easily, leaving a lot of debris and dust behind. I can’t be bothered by something so trivial, so I continue rushing through the long corridors, ignoring the traps and monsters on my way.

I fell like I’ll die from overexerting myself but I keep pushing, the feeling in the back of my mind doesn’t let me even consider taking a breather.

Slow. Too slow. Too pathetically slow.

After a few moments that felt like an eternity, I finally arrive at the familiar stone door. But it’s a bit different from what I remember. There’s a huge hole in the door. And a lot of debris.

Well, I’m sure it can be explained somehow. There’s probably a perfectly sound explanation.

‘Stop lying to yourself. Don’t run away from the truth.’

The nasty voice in my head whispers. No! Everything is fine! I’m sure! It’s, It’s just that…

‘Don’t pretend you don’t know what’s going on’

Shut up! I refuse to listen to you! I know I’m right because I’m right, I know it!!! Because there’s no other way! I can’t be wrong! This isn’t happening! So shut the hell up!

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‘You know the truth’

I feel as if a cold dagger has pierced my chest. My vision begins to dim and I feel like there’s a bucket of water inside my lungs that prevents me from breathing.

I force myself to step into the room. It’s hard to see and I don’t want to see it.

A little hope is still present in my heart when I don’t see anything irregular in this dark room full of dusty bookshelves. This hope dies when I see it.

There’s dishevelled pale silver hair with a little bit of violet and it’s covering her face. She was very proud of her hair to the point when my ears hurt many times when she was talking about it but now it’s burned on ends and its previous lustre is nowhere to be seen.

Her thin right hand is burned up to her elbow. In some places, white bones are seen too.

Her torso…

I don’t want to continue looking. I can’t. I just limply fall to the floor and stare into nothingness. There isn’t any energy left in me to cry. I can’t even feel anything, I’m so exhausted. I feel empty. Maybe it’s for the best? I should just bury this memory. I should just bury all of the memories I have about her before I regain the ability to feel again.

Maybe it’s for the best. When I prepare my mind for the forced memory extraction, I can’t help but hesitate. I still have so many memories of her. They are so precious and I don’t want to forget. But those memories will have to stay in the past. All is lost. Without this method how can I find the strength to live anymore? Do I even need to?

But can I really leave it all like this? No. I feel rage building up inside me and I feel bitter for being wronged.

At the very least I’ll have to avenge her.

And I will. I will make them experience such pain and suffering, the deepest pits of hell will seem like a paradise in comparison. I will take everything from them. I will get my vengeance.

I promise that from now on not a single god shall escape my wrath. Blood will flow in rivers and wails of suffering will fill the air. They will not escape.

I prepare to forcefully bury my memories. The process has already begun.

“Farewell, my love.”

That’s all I can say before the world turns black.

******

I wake from this strange daze. So strange, what was I doing? It seems I’m really tired after all.

Tomorrow mother and I will go and get the first god that seems to have taken notice of us. I have a few interesting ideas I wanted to try out with the Asylum and I want to test them out.

Still, relying on tools sucks. I want to get my powers back already!

Well, I’ll just have to wait. Not like I’m lacking in time or anything.

Still, I’m strangely agitated when I think about the hunt tomorrow. Weird. I never liked violence. Especially when I have to do all the work myself.

Maybe I’m just bored?

Yeah, that’s probably it. Let’s go to sleep.