FILTERS 24
OUTSIDE-CONTEXT PROBLEM
Clouds again surround them. Andrew looks at his gloves. Kevlar-woven just as his father uses, but a different brand and a different color, black running under his sleeves past his elbows. He rubs one thumb and forefinger together, feeling the fabric. Have I been sleepwalking? How much have I ignored, how many small things have I overlooked because my sight is my dominion? He looks at Canton but only sees Earth. Gaze on infinity, imagine dominion. I am nothing, this is a cantrip. He looks at Canton, on whose silver clouds shift dark and strange. So dependent on his sight he ignored his eyes’ protestation, This isn’t right. He tries to find seams but no lines resolve, he missed wholly how the silver bleeds into the air, how this other seems made of mirrored haze. He thought his gift balanced ignorance; he buried himself in it.
“For all the good today”
If he only had his eyes he wouldn’t see Canton shake his head. “For all the good today some will see what we did as a kind of flaunting ourselves in the capital of the world. They will demand more. The government will have to increase their efforts and the visibility of what they are already doing, even as they can do nothing.”
Andrew wonders what sounds he has ignored. “With who you are, do you know why they’ve been so quiet?”
Canton says “I know little of their work. There is a list of enhanced Americans they assume contains controllers so it is accurate insofar as our names are on it, but I don’t think this surprises you.”
“It doesn’t.”
“Yes, acting outside the government seems our default; skepticism of authority our common temperament, regardless of our upbringings. Tell me, what have you guessed on their silence?”
Regardless of our upbringings, of course Canton saw the flag in the shop. “I’d call it naive bullshit, but I guess in some fairness to me they don’t really have many options. I’ve been so sure they would find me and come to me that’s all I let myself consider. All summer I waited, thinking I’d see them at my door or inside my house while I was out. Every day that didn’t happen I got a little more hopeful they hadn’t found me, like I really convinced them I wasn’t American. I can’t believe that after today. How many people on that list are my height, a few thousand? I pretty much buzzed DC on the way, if they spotted me–if they didn’t know before, I think they might know right now.”
Canton says nothing, Andrew doesn’t wait. “If they don’t show after this, I think my father’s most pessimistic guess is right. Obviously they would want something when they came. When I was young we thought it would be to stick me in a lab, then when I knew they couldn’t keep me in one, to use me as a weapon. Now my father wonders if they’ll show as little as they can until they’re sure they can kill me, but–” but this termite’s cantrips are still more than any marvels of man, such marvels, “I wonder sometimes if they’ll ever be able to.”
If he only had his eyes he wouldn’t see Canton nod. "What does it mean to do more about a phenomenon that shattered all paradigms? Easy for those outside and on the periphery of power to make demands when that’s where their thought-to-action ends. ‘Do something about them,’ like what? Find us if they haven’t and approach us when they have? Then what? They wouldn’t come to us only to say they know, yes they would want something. Their desire is great but it is matched by their unknowns. This is part of why they have been quiet: they don’t know how to ask. They will not take us as amenable or good because of these interventions, nor should they. Prudence is assuming the worst, the closest they have to precedent came in dealing with groups, not individuals. The strength of the majority is history’s lever and we upend that. No man has ever simply possessed power, so how do they ask? They cannot offer status. Our country, with all its enlightened trappings, still has status essentially supported by authority. What man holds authority over us? Ourselves, we are truly our own authority. Our place is asserted by our existence, we are our proof of status. Do they offer wealth? It would take no small sum and it would be the same question. Real wealth is still the lesser of power so we could accept their money but they would know we weren’t bought. What remains to persuade us? Finding something we agree with? That’s the most difficult question of all.”
“Axiomatic status. . . I–I feel ridiculous actually saying this, but I also hoped, when they came, they would offer some kind of peaceful cooperation, where they would help me as I helped others. I know though, anything I did while carrying the flag would be seen as an empty gesture. Hard power masquerading as soft power, and I know that’s exactly how they would want it.”
Canton says “And we are already helping others. You have twice quite notably, and that is the point of my entire work. That sort of cooperation could have wonderful results, but even if we acted as plowshares, even if they called us great peace-bringers, no one would mistake that poor fig leaf. Yes, they want us as weapons, for we are the ultimate deterrent, each of us an army–and yes, their greatest desire is our deaths, the end to what we represent. There is no doubt a project orchestrated in Special Access depths whose purpose, translated from bureaucratic euphemism, is finding how to kill us. It would exist even if we carried the flag, and if we were anyone else we would want it to exist, so fair enough.”
He once would have found those words so cavalier. Unsettling heard in clouds. Denying, unneeded and performative to ask “Why doesn’t that bother you?”
Canton says “You know why. You already said it. What you wonder is true and you didn’t need years of tests for confirmation. After what you have now done and witnessed you see it all, you feel it implicitly. Proof of this new paradigm might as well be proof of God for the good it does their understanding. Nothing man wields can harm us. Whatever ends we are meant to achieve, we are with certainty meant to be free from capricious rule. If we could be stopped, there would be no point in having this.”
There would be no point in having this alone. Andrew is thankful his expression is hidden. “But we have families.”
Canton points down. “So do they. What can they threaten that we couldn’t repay to nine relations? For their plans, ours is a scarce and inconvenient vulnerability they would only try to leverage in desperation. We aren’t criminals or terrorists reliant on the shadows and whose families could be turned against us under threat of superior force. We are nation-states in flesh, targeting our families would be an act of war and your justified disintegrations of skyscrapers would take no more time or effort if repeated on the Pentagon. Despite this, they aren’t motivated by fear, they’re motivated by envy and jealousy. Our precedent is diplomacy, and this is what has driven them to being apparently lethargic. They are quiet because they do not want our weight in politics. In becoming public the nature of our celebrity would make our very selves political, and when we took a side, who would oppose? As long as we only show like today, or Redhat hopping cities or Mondai dancing in the sky, they can delay taking hard moves on the political implications of our existence. For this they may be more interested in our secrecy than ourselves. The security-minded among them especially, who recognize the grave strategic disadvantage of an American controller’s family being known to the world, least of all because they would become accompanying celebrities. Though for obvious reasons likely less for me. I have also always assumed I will be found. With who I am I don’t know if I will be outed or approached. If I am approached, I may go public myself.”
His father has said so much of this. His father suggested the same. He looks at his shoes and beneath, through a gap in the clouds to the consuming twilight white of the Arctic. Maybe it’s good I can still be made to feel like a child. Is, ought, I ought not have been so arrogant.
If that’s true, why would they ever approach me, and why would I go public?
If they cannot harm you they will, in some sense of the phrase, learn to live with you. We are long past this country’s flirtation with realpolitik, so while it would be nice if learning to live with you means our leaders shine as your presence is a pressure that strengthens their reason, I am wary of cracks. Movements that make demands beyond logic are growing precipitously and your presence may instead aggravate their unreason. Knowing they can do nothing about you could be a dark liberation, freeing them to whatever they feel is necessary to maintain their place. A meeting may be forced, and if the public does not know who you are, that meeting necessarily connotes threat of it being revealed. In the best case, they will understand that threat and how you may choose to go public in response, and though they do not want it, they will be prepared. In the worst, they will not appreciate how your secrecy benefits them and, blinded by their great conceit, they will believe that threat advantages them. Going public would be the first reminder, and warning, of how they are beneath you.”
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“My father suggested that. I understand his reasoning, but I still have to ask: why would you go public?”
Canton says “Like yourself, what it took for me to reach New York may have given me away entirely. Even if it hasn’t, I must assume it has, or that something else has or will. It would be reckless to assume I have been perfect and will continue to be perfect at hiding myself. Certain errors of one of us may apply to all of us, and as they accumulate, the probability of our discovery will only increase. It could be the government, it could be shockingly effective crowdsourced research, or it could be one lucky civilian in just the right place. If somehow the government were ignorant of our identities before we were public, they would approach us when we were public. The rational belief is they will know before, they will assume the information will not be contained, and they will want a meeting anticipating that. I see government officials often enough no one meeting would appear unusual, but those officials have staffs. Every link in the chain is a chance that information reaches someone who does not understand its importance and leaks it in some bastard sense of duty. And since they would want something, they may treat my identity as a chip in negotiations. If so, the chaos caused by my going public would disadvantage them as from that point they would have to engage me on clear ground. That change would remind them of the disparity between us, and with such people, that is crucial. As I said, they are motivated by envy and jealousy, their envy of our power and their jealousy as our power threatens theirs. If they approached us it would carry a threat, but our mere presence at the table is a threat. We will always be considered a challenge to their authority and when they learn of their futility some will find us that much more intolerable.” Canton sighs, “They’re not all bad. There are good people among them, the righteous who fear us for their love of humanity. Intelligent enough, thoughtful, funny, often the best of us. They want to change the world and we complicate an already terrible game. A game that corrupts for it is inherently corrupt. A game that attracts the spiritually bankrupt and washes them together with those righteous few who are turned myopic and exploited in the essentially lesser’s inexorable drive to power. The less we challenge theirs, no matter how just it would be, the more time we have to establish ourselves off this planet. There is nothing that matters more, Andrew.”
What is this feeling?
Silver-ethereal Canton, is it that material, or is it this power? That which evokes this feeling, the same he evokes, when strengthened over wakeful decades would even light respect him? Still Canton dismisses Earth. “Unbounded good,” sow the stars with man and no one catastrophe could annihilate, but fine to destroy ourselves here as long as some survive elsewhere?
Yes–undoubtedly yes. Take that threat from tyrants and leave all with perspective of greatness.
But we could take everything from tyrants and force ascension. Canton ignores Earth when he could be a king, when he could be an emperor?
“Then why not become King Canton for real?”
Canton raises his arms. “Am I not already a monarch? My companies are my kingdom, there my word is final. The government is no obstruction, nor would they be if my power were known. My greatest obstacle is gone with your help. What more could I gain? Or should I ask, if you were the only one of us, how would you change the world?”
“I wouldn’t. Not in that way. I don’t want that kind of power.”
“Save for one each of us has independently arrived at using our place to help others. I think you have a better answer than that, First.”
Andrew says “That is my answer. I don’t want that kind of power, I don’t want to use this for control. But if I used this to advocate for something, power would be expressed in every word. It would happen because of it, but only because people would be afraid of me. Good governance needs to fear the people, every peaceful way to ensure accountability is still based in the threat of revolution. I’d have nothing to fear, so I’d be throwing everything out in my own arrogance. It would be the worst coercion, people would be paralyzed, powerless to stop me, only able to hope I’m making the right decisions. I can’t, I don’t know enough, and who could I trust? So many would come to me, trying to convince me of what I should do, and I don’t think I’m a good enough judge of character to know good people from snakes every time. The smallest decision could have consequences people would be dealing with a hundred years from now. I’d be bound, I would have to be there to make up for every wrong decision. One choice would become all of them, and eventually that means I’m king. That might work, or it might only seem to work as the groups competing underneath me got worse and worse and someday destroyed everything I worked toward. Or just everything. Of course there are things I say I would like changed, but the certainty I can change something has to be treated as the weapon it is. For me, for who I am, that means standing back. My plan before wanting to help you was to be a poor imitation of you. Make enough money in sports to invest and start a charity and help people that way. I know using a bank account to effect change can be full of problems, but against hard advocacy that would become a chain dragging me to the throne, I choose the first.”
Canton asks “Why do you think I would do any better?”
Why do I think that? What is this feeling? This isn’t his words. This isn’t control. This is something else. “I think if anybody could, it’s you.”
Canton laughs. “Well, Andrew, I appreciate your confidence, but I am also disinterested in that kind of power. We may be set apart, we may find ourselves detached, but we haven’t forgotten our humanity. That’s why we met today, that’s why you’re the First. I have no desire to coerce others or abuse what I have. This tool of our ascension must be tempered, because ensuring a future for humanity that doesn’t require our presence is how we shall prevail. I cannot however leave you with a false impression. If there were no other option, I would take power.”
Andrew now wishes his expression could be seen. If I was detached, at least my actions weren’t. What is this feeling? Clarity, set apart. He knows why he should mistrust Canton, more for that last statement, but doubts fall to nothing, his character clear. What are you? “That’s why I want to work with you. What you’re doing is inspiring.”
Canton nods and he can see it. “I’m glad to hear that. We’re going to achieve great things.”
“I can’t wait,” and now that Andrew knows, he can ask. “You spent years trying to find something that could harm you? You found nothing?”
Canton says “Nothing.”
“Five of us are known, you said there are nine. The others seem good, even Suraj is harmless compared to what we’re capable of. What happens when one of us doesn’t want to help people, when one of us isn’t merely discontent with the way of things? What do we do if one of us becomes a destroyer?”
Canton tells him.
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He flies, he runs. He stands at his door and uncovers his jacket from where he’s hidden it around his waist, beneath his shirt, sleeves tucked into his sweatpants. He looks at the letters on the back, then turns it over and puts it on. He takes the bolt and rolls it back and opens the door.
He sees her, dark hair a mess around her shoulders, bangs low to her brow, above dark eyes, above high cheeks, above pink lips, a perfect bow. His fingertips drift over her collarbone to where it’s covered by her light sweater, his hands run up her neck to hold her cheek. She fits, his constant. All thoughts on and of her. Conversations so far, morning runs, how dogs look at her. Time spent in books, that she would gift him books. Her pace aloof, detached in ways from the worldly, waiting for her him to invite to her own world. Not any, all. All this time my balance. I overlook nothing when I am with you. He takes her hand and feels the ring on her finger and her other hand on his unshaven cheek and Emilia pushes onto her toes to kiss him.