The young girl stared down at the open notebook resting on her lap. Not much was on the page at the moment, just ‘43’ that she had written at the top. That was because it was the 43rd day since she had been given this notebook, and also the 43rd day since she’d been alive. Well, technically she had been alive much longer than that. Her keeper had told her that she was 13 years old. However, 43 days ago had been the first time she remembered anything and was aware that she was alive. To her, it was like she had been born on that day, since before then there was nothing.
The cover of the notebook read ‘Diary #4’. She didn’t know what happened to the first three diaries, or if she was even the one who wrote in them. Her keeper had instructed her to write the day's events in the diary under the belief that it would help her remember things. On occasion, she would also be given tasks that she was supposed to complete in it. And to give her that task, that day, like every day, a video played on the TV in her room.
This time it was a video on how to draw, and her assignment was to draw something in her notebook. The girl was having a tough time deciding her subject, not knowing what people would normally draw, and even if she did, the scope of the things she knew of was so small. Finally, she chose to simply draw her room from her current perspective. She started with the walls, outlining the room with identical dimensions.
Next, she did the ceiling and floor, making sure to include the exact number of tiles on both, even every scuff mark and bit of damage. Lastly, she did the things in the room: there was the door, the television mounted on the wall, and her bed, or as much as she could see from her spot sitting on it, all recreated perfectly. That was it. There was nothing else in her room besides that small selection.
When she was done, she held the drawing in front of her face and then compared it to the real thing. They were identical, as if someone had taken a photograph from her eyes and transferred it onto the notebook, but without the color. Though everything in her room, including the walls and door, were black or white, so there wasn’t much difference at all.
Now that she had finished her task, she was back to her usual conundrum of having no idea what to do next. There was nothing else in her room to occupy her time. She couldn’t watch the TV on her own. Someone from outside had to turn it on for her, and they picked what videos she watched. There was no clock in her room, so she had no indication of what time it was, or when her keeper would come to get her. There were also no windows so she had no natural light to go by. The young teen turned back to the first page of her notebook, choosing to read through it again.
> 1: I woke up in bed today, but at the time I did not know what it or anything else was called. Since I didn’t know what to do, I just laid there. I stared at the ceiling until a man opened the door and came in the room. He said to call him Keeper, and that he was in charge of me. He then told me my name was Mallea, that I was 13 years old, and that my brain had been ‘reset’. I did not know what a brain was or what reset meant until later. I still don’t think I know what it means.
>
> He said that I did not have a family, that they had been killed by bad people. I think family means people who gave birth to you and you’re supposed to feel sad when you lose them, but I don’t remember my family, so I don’t feel sad. Next, Keeper laid on the ground, just like I was lying on the bed, and he sat up and told me to do it too. He then stood up, and told me to do it too. He said that I should know how to talk, and told me to say my name. I did. I was surprised. I didn’t know I knew how to talk.
>
> Then a person who wasn’t Keeper came into the room, he brought a chair and a bag of things, then left. Keeper sat in the chair and had me sit back on the bed, then pulled out two whiteboards. He gave me a blank one, but on his was the alphabet. He went through every letter and then gave me a marker. He told me to write them but I didn’t know how. He erased the first letter with his hand, then took the marker and wrote it back. After that I could write them, all of them. Next he taught me what words are, and showed me how to spell my name. Then he went through the basics of grammar with me.
>
> He then gave me a small book. He said it was a dictionary that would be full of all the words I would need, but said the ones I wouldn’t need weren’t in it. He had me read it until someone brought food in. They sat the tray down on the bed next to me and gave a plate with a sandwich on it to Keeper. He took a bite, chewed, then swallowed, and told me that was how to eat.
>
> I think I like food. My mouth seemed to enjoy when the food was inside of it, and my stomach felt better afterwards too. I also felt more awake after eating, and before I knew it, all my food was gone. After that, Keeper took me outside of my room and into another door across the hall. He called it a bathroom, and taught me how to use everything in it, but he told me not to write about that part in my diary.
>
> Next he took me to another room. There was a thing that looked like a human called a dummy in the middle. Sticking out of it was a weapon called a knife. Keeper pulled the knife out of the dummy and put it back in. He told me it was called stabbing. Then he told me to stab the dummy. I did, but it seemed I didn’t do it good enough. He told me to stab it harder, so I did. He told me to stab it as hard as I could, so I did. Again, he said. Again, again, again, again, again, again, again, again, again, again, again, again.
>
> I lost count of how many times he said again. When he finally told me to stop, I could barely feel my hands, but they hurt at the same time. He took me to another room, this one had a lot of people and machines in it. He had me lay on a table and put a metal hat with a tube around my head. Then I fell asleep for a bit, but when I woke up it was time for more food. I think food is my favorite thing so far.
>
> After the food was gone, Keeper took me back to my room, and told me to finish the dictionary. He then gave me this diary and told me I had to always write what happened that day in it. Before he left he asked if I had any questions. I asked him where I was and why was I here. He said I was in a laboratory and that I was part of a special project. He said I was going to save the world.
The girl read a few more entries after the first before there was finally a knock on the door. “Mallea, it’s Keeper, I’m coming in.” The door opened and Keeper stepped inside. “Come along now, Mallea,” he said as he held out his hand to her. Mallea got up from the bed and handed over her diary to him, not knowing that they were normally considered a private item. He then took her across the hall to the bathroom.
She was only allowed to use the bathroom at appointed times during the day, so she was told to try and relieve herself whether she felt the need to or not. Next, she was taken to the cafeteria.The girl had heard that all of the staff ate there, but none were ever occupying it when she was. Mallea ate the exact same meals every day, completely unaware of the concept of diversity and having different moods and tastes.
When she was finished, Keeper took her to the training room where they focused on honing her skills. That day she was practicing blending in and escaping. She was given a demonstration on how to change quickly by a woman, and watched a video about blending in and looking inconspicuous. Afterwards, they practiced the techniques she learned. The girl always wondered why they ever had her repeat a task more than once. No matter how many times she did it, she never got any better or worse, and could always do it from the beginning.
Next came Mallea’s favorite part of the day, except for when it was time for food. A few days ago, she had been shown a video on the concepts and practical uses of stealth. Since then, once a day, she was taken to a new room filled with various objects. There were crates, furniture, a merchant stall, and many other miscellaneous items. None of these things went together, but they simulated what one would look for when they wanted to hide.
The girl went and hid somewhere in the room as she did every day, then a door opened and a man stepped inside. She peeked around from her hiding spot to see who would be playing with her today. A lanky man stepped into the room. He wasn’t wearing a shirt and was covered in tattoos. Like everyone else over the past days, he was wearing a gag that prevented him from speaking. Keeper’s voice boomed over a loudspeaker. “Remember, all you have to do is find the girl. Do that, and we let you go free with your record wiped clean. Do not try to remove your gag, or you will fail immediately.”
Mallea wasn’t sure what any of Keeper’s words really meant. She just knew that she could get to have fun with someone for a change. Until now, the only person who ever interacted with her was Keeper. She saw some of the other staff often, but none of them ever spoke to her, even when she tried to talk to them directly. Now that someone was actively trying to seek her out, she wasn’t going to let it end so soon.
The man immediately began checking behind all of the objects around him, causing the girl to chuckle silently to herself since she was nowhere near. Eventually, he did begin to head in her general direction, so she decided it was time to move. Mallea skulked from place to place, making sure her movements were completely silent, and that when she moved, the man never even had a chance to spot her.
She had also watched a video recently of various animals stalking their prey, so it was now ingrained in her to track and monitor this man on instinct. The girl was always completely aware of his location, not that he was particularly trying to be discreet. Mallea continued to avoid the man for a while longer, until she got bored of their dance. She knew Keeper would want her to end this as quickly as possible, but it would be too much of a wasted opportunity.
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The hunter wanted to see just how far her skills could take her. She strolled up right behind the man and began to tail him, just mere inches from his back, following him all around the room, never leaving his side, and eventually began to mimic his movements. She found this quite enjoyable since the girl didn’t often get to mess around like this. The man never became aware of her presence, no matter how bold she got with her actions.
Even though she was enjoying their time together, Mallea was starting to get hungry. She knew that the sooner she finished her assignment, the sooner she would get to eat. After pulling something out of her pocket, Mallea leapt up past the man's head and landed in front of him. She spun around, gave a salute, and congratulated him with a cheery smile, “Good job, Mister! You found me!”
The man did not look at her, and the light in his eyes began to fade. A single drop of blood fell off of the metal wire Mallea was holding in her hands. A ring of red formed around the victim’s head, just above his ears. The top of his skull began to shift, sliding to the side, and then off completely, landing on the ground. It was followed swiftly by the rest of his body, collapsing as Mallea stepped aside, then more blood began to gush out of the exposed cranium
“Oh, is this a brain?!,” the unphased murderer wondered, looking at the bit of pink mush on the severed part of the skull. She bent down and began to poke it. “Oh wow, it’s so weird!” A minute later, one of the doors opened and Keeper entered the room. Mallea ran over to him and asked, “Did I do good, Keeper?”
“Yes, you did, Mallea. I just wish you hadn’t fooled around so much,” the man scolded her sternly. “But that doesn’t matter now. Come along, it’s time for your tests.” He led her to the usual room, helped her up on the table, and put the metal hat around her head. In a few seconds, the girl drifted off to sleep.
“I’m afraid we’ve run into a small issue sir.” Mallea heard a strange voice as she woke up on the table. It was the first time she’d heard it, and didn’t want to make a scene since they’d most likely stop.
“Is it the storage space again?” Keeper asked the woman.
“Yes, I’m afraid so,” the woman confirmed. “She’s still filling her brain up faster than she can generate new space.”
Keeper slammed the desk. “Cosdammit… after all our efforts… We completely isolated her and disposed of every other test subject to minimize her exposure! Should we start over again? I know the world will be forced to suffer longer each time we do it, but we need to get it right.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea sir,” the woman hesitated. “Her replication rate came back today too, and it’s at 100%”
Keeper’s hand slipped from the desk he was leaning on, causing him to stumble for a moment. “Seriously, 100%?! That’s astounding. Our original estimates never predicted higher than 85%. That’s simply amazing, and you’re right. We can’t risk affecting that balance. Tell me, how much longer until she’s at capacity?”
The woman turned back to her computer and clicked around for a minute, then turned back to the man and reported, “Given her average daily intake, it looks right about seven weeks.”
“That’s more time than I expected, hmm…” Keeper pondered. “I think I might have an idea on how we can use this to our advantage. We can’t keep her under for much longer, so I’ll work on this new plan and get back to everyone later.” The man then turned to face the room, prompting Mallea to go back to playing dead. Keeper saluted as he proclaimed, “We have made great strides people, keep up the good work. Remember, everything we do, we do for the good of the world.”
The rest of the scientists in the room saluted him in turn as Keeper walked back over to the table with the girl who was pretending to be asleep. Once her hat was removed, she pretended to wake up like normal, and went back to her room without saying anything.
◆◆◆
The next seven weeks passed similarly to the last. Eventually, the scientists stopped bringing in new people each day for Mallea to play with, which made her sad—only coming to realize a few weeks later that she had been killing them, but it didn’t bother her too much. They also did not fill the time with more videos or practice as she expected. Now, after their morning sessions ended, she was brought back to her room, and given various things to occupy the time such as activity books that utilized the knowledge she already possessed. Mallea was not required to complete any of them, but were merely available as an option to her.
When she asked why the sudden change, Keeper answered that they did not want to overwork her. She was thankful for this, since during the last week especially, she was finding it harder to focus, and her head had been feeling heavy as the day went on. Finally, on day 91, during her usual morning session, she began to feel dizzy and confused. All of a sudden, her mind went completely blank, unable to process anything that was happening around her, and then she passed out.
She woke up four days later strapped to the usual table where she wore the metal hat. Keeper explained to her that during her episode, he had come in and injected her with a sleeping drug, and they had kept her under these past days to allow her brain time to heal. Mallea was still exhausted and starving, so after taking her to get some food, they let her rest in her room for the rest of the day.
The next day, Keeper took her to a brand new room. It solely consisted of a chair with a metal hat like the one in the lab, and a television. He had her sit in the chair and placed the hat on her head. Next, he explained that he was going to show videos on a couple of bad people named Drazah. Lastly, he said that when she got dizzy like before, she was to hit the button on the chair.
After he left, the videos began to play. Every bit of it was all about the Drazah war: propaganda, documentaries, news reports, an endless stream of information on them. Eventually, Mallea reached her limit and hit the button. The screen immediately cut off, and she fell asleep a second later. The girl woke back up in her room, then was given food and the rest of the day off.
This was repeated for the next few months. There was no more training, no more practice, only the Drazahs. She would watch videos on them until she was dizzy and stopped. New information was slowly introduced as well, including general habits of the Drazah family, and full dossiers of the guards under their employ. As time went on, she began to feel more emotional. Whenever a member of the Drazah family was displayed on screen, her entire body burned hot. She started feeling antsy, which turned into irrational anger after a while. Mallea wanted to hurt them, make them go away, make her stop feeling all these ugly emotions.
Finally, on day 187, it happened. Keeper came into the room with two bags and informed her, “We’re going on a trip today, Mallea.” She asked him where they were going, to which he replied, “To your destiny, Mallea. This is what you’ve been working towards. We’re going to go save the world.”
The sunlight was blinding as the girl stepped outside for the first time in her life, that she could remember at least. They were at the base of a mountain. Apparently, this entire time she had been inside an underground bunker. A man waiting by a van greeted them, “Welcome Ms. Mallea, it’s an honor to be escorting you today.” The girl was shocked, it was the first time anyone but Keeper had ever spoken to her directly, and he was being so nice to her.
The man drove them to the train station, where they were greeted by another overly friendly man who had tickets waiting for them. This was all so unsettling to the girl who was essentially a hermit, and she tried to calm down during the train ride as she sat next to Keeper. A day later, they reached their stop, and her guardian took her to a restaurant next to the nearby bus station. He said she could order whatever she liked, but since she had eaten the same thing every day, she didn’t know most of the menu items and ordered what she knew. During the meal, Keeper said somberly, “I’m afraid after this meal, it will be where we part ways.”
Mallea started to feel a little unsettled. Without Keeper, she would feel completely lost and alone, but she knew there was no point in arguing with him if this was his decision. He then continued. “From here, you will get on a bus and head north to a town called Bisomote.” The girl’s ears perked up, she knew that place well. “Yes, that is where the Drazahs live. They have just returned from their most recent campaign, but will only be there for a short amount of time… I think you know what I’m going to say next Mallea… You are going to go kill the Drazahs.”
“Why me?” the girl asked sheepishly, not bothered by the act, but rather the burden. “Why did you pick me for this?”
“You’re special, Mallea,” Keeper insisted. “No one else would be able to do this. Many have tried. I know you want to do this too. You want that gnawing pain to go away, right? If you do this, I promise you’ll feel whole again. You won’t be restricted anymore either, and you’ll be able to live the life you want to live. Remember those people who you met yesterday, how they adored you? They knew what you were going to do and believed in you. Everyone who has worked on this project believes in you. I know you won’t let them down, and afterwards you’ll be a hero to the entire world. Only then will you finally be allowed to be happy.”
Happy… Mallea knew what the word meant but was unsure if she ever had felt it herself. Keeper had never seemed happy either, nor anyone whom she had ever met. None of them really appeared sad persay, but she couldn’t consider them under the definition of happy that she knew. Was it because of the Drazahs? What would make me happy…? It was a question to which she didn’t have an answer.
After the meal was done, Keeper escorted her to the bus station and handed her one of the bags. “Everything you’ll need is in here, including the weapons. I’m going to head back to the bunker after this. I’d go with you, but I’m afraid I’d be too recognizable. When your job is done, there will be a man waiting for you in the lobby of the town’s hotel.”
Mallea had been staring at the ground for the past few minutes, lost in thought. She took the bag and then looked up at Keeper, right in his eyes and asked, “Keeper… are we a family?”
The man knelt down next to her and put his hand on her head. “If that’s what you want, Mallea. When this is all over, we can be.”
“I think… that would make me happy,” the girl was filled with a newfound determination. She hugged Keeper, which he seemed to find unexpected, then grabbed her bag and boarded the bus. A couple of hours later, she reached Bisomote right as the sun was starting to set. She headed off to the bus station bathroom and hid all of the weapons on her body that had been in the bag, making sure none of them stood out. After stashing her stuff somewhere no one would find it, she headed out to the streets and began walking north to the Drazah compound.