A troubled Angel, oath forsook
What secrets told from cryptic Book?
Night stretched herself languidly over the town of Watchroads, indigo silks spread out dramatically, studded with diamond-bright jewels. Her bright eye was half-lidded in the west, her gentle breath coolly blowing away the oppressive heat of the day.
The windmills on the watchtowers turned slowly, silently on their well-greased axles. Below them, The Line stretched on, crowded with evening markets, full of lights and noise and music and the braying of animals, an endless bustle in the night.
Tander sat on the parapet of one of the towers, facing east. The breeze was welcome, but the temperature was still balmy, and he had left his armour, spear and white uniform jacket in his room at the inn, which was situated just beneath him, connected to the tower. He was barefoot, clad only in short breeches and a loose-fitting linen shirt. The breeze tousled his brown hair about his shoulders a little, and quietly stirred some feathers.
He stared down at his shadow on the tiled roof below him. It appeared and disappeared in slow, regular intervals as the huge, green-and-yellow patterned sails of the windmill behind him passed through the streaming moonlight.
One moment he was there; the next, he was gone. Then, he was back again.
His own crippling indecision stared back at him.
His heart felt as though it had cracked in two, with his loyalty to the Legion on one half, and a little fiery-winged Angel girl on the other.
Leaving Li behind... didn't feel right.
Ever since they had departed the wraith-haunted town of Meadrun, Nix had taunted Tander about the girl relentlessly. Even when Reeves ordered him to cease, he continued to sneak barbs into every conversation. Tander knew that the younger man was playing his usual game of attempting to get a reaction out of him, but this time it was deeper than that... Tander suspected that it was Nix’s way of distracting himself, to avoid thinking about Parsh.
The two of them had been fairly close friends. Few in the Legion had any patience for Nix's nonsense, but in Parsh's acerbic cynicism, he had found a kindred spirit. Now, he had lost the only person he was somewhat close to, and he was having trouble coming to terms with his friend's death.
The loss, too, of Caer Sync had shaken them all badly, and was something even Tander was still struggling to process.
And then there was Reeves.
Weirdly, ever since they had resumed their journey, their Commander's demeanour had changed. He had brightened considerably, his spirits high, overflowing with optimism, as though surviving a soul-shattering catastrophe and losing most of the squad he had brought with him from Sundown Peak had been irrelevant, and everything was going completely as he had planned it.
Tander was worried about him. The spark of confidence, of supreme self-assurance that had always burned in Reeves’ disarming turquoise eyes had now become a little too bright, as though toying with the tail of madness...
And all the while, Tander's mood sank into a mire.
He closed his eyes. He could feel himself slowly breaking apart; emotions that he had prided himself with keeping under control were finally beginning to flounder. Both Nix and Reeves had poked fatal holes in his defences…
There was a soft sound behind him, and a rush of air. When he opened his eyes again, another winged shadow stood beside his own on the tiled roof. He didn't need to look around, or ask who it was. Nix was down in the tavern, drinking, and wouldn't have landed so softly.
“Is there something you want, Commander?” he muttered.
The other Angel did not reply immediately. After a long pause, Reeves' voice floated down to him. “You care more for that girl than I expected,” he said.
Tander glowered at his shadow. “Are you here to mock me, as well? Would you like to give me a lecture on how foolish I have been?” His words came out more bitterly than he had intended them to.
Reeves responded with a quiet laugh.
Tander made a sound of disgust. He waved a hand. “Why don't you go down there to the tavern with Nix, and drink yourselves both to death?” He leaned his face on his hand.
Strangely, Reeves made no reply. The scathing rebuke did not come.
Instead, there was silence.
The silence went on for so long that Tander thought his Commander had left. After awhile, he glanced over his shoulder.
Reeves was still there, leaning with his back against the conical copper roof spire of the watchtower. Like Tander, he had forgone armour, weapons and his long white coat, wearing only long trousers and a white silken shirt that was open at the front, exposing his chest beneath his folded arms. Beyond him, the giant sails continued turning, opening a wedge of moonlight that illuminated Reeves' face in profile as he gazed up at the stars.
Tander found himself staring, transfixed by Reeves’ graceful beauty and unexpectedly pensive expression, without a hint of mockery. Blinking, he looked away abruptly, a hole burning in his chest and his heart beating painfully within it, a little too fast.
Reeves spoke then, at last, his voice uncharacteristically soft, but clear. “Shall I tell you?”
“T-tell me what?” Tander replied unthinkingly.
The silence that followed gathered weight, became something profound.
Tander went very still, catching his breath in shock. For a confused moment, he wondered if he had somehow mistook Reeves’ words; perhaps it was a trick question, a rhetorical one, or sarcasm, perhaps…
Surely, he couldn’t mean…?!
Slowly, he turned around and got to his feet, staring at Reeves again, eyes wide.
“Reeves…”
The other Angel did not look at him, but instead reached into the pocket of his shirt and pulled out his book. He stood staring down at it.
“This book,” he murmured, “belonged to a dead girl.” He paused, then went on: “A dead… Human girl.”
He looked off into the distance, across the moon-gilded roofs of the town, his eyes glazed but hard, as though steeling himself against his own memories. “She was my childhood friend. My first and only friend. I should have listened to the judgement of my parents. I should have known that becoming close to her was folly.”
He looked back down at the book. “This book belonged to her father. From where he acquired it, I have no idea, but he passed it on to his daughter.
“Talia was often to be found sitting under a tree with her nose buried in it. I mocked her for it, mercilessly. I told her that reading was for heathens, but my jeers had no effect on her. This irritated me, and eventually I became so angry that I stole the book and threatened to burn it unless she told me what it contained that was so interesting.
“She just giggled at me, as though I were an infant playing a game, and told me to go ahead and burn it, because she could not read it anyway.”
Reeves’ eyes burned with the memory. “I was so confused that I threw the book at her. She picked it up and told me that, although she could not read the words, she knew exactly what the book was about, because her father had told her.”
He closed his eyes. “She told me the story, then, and I did not believe her. I thought it was not only ridiculous, but blasphemous. I was furious, and insulted to the core of my being to hear her speak such heresy.
“Her insistence that the story was true almost ended our relationship. I avoided her for weeks after that, much to the happiness of my parents, who did not approve of my friendship with a Human.
“But I was alone, living in a remote cottage in the forest, with no siblings and no Angel companions my own age. Other Human children would not come near me.
“And so… I sought Talia out again.
“She kept repeating the story, even though it upset me, as though determined that I understand it. Sometimes, I caught her looking at me with… pity, as though I were an ignorant fool!”
Reeves’ expression was bitter. “How dare she condescend me, a Human child!” He made a sound that could have been regret or disgust. “But my anger eventually burned itself out, my defences broke down, and I… found myself believing her.”
He shook his head. “Perhaps Talia’s father was a convincing storyteller. I refused to meet him, I never spoke to him, so I cannot say. But, finally I came to be persuaded that the story was, indeed, true.
“One day, I suggested that we play atop some high cliffs in the mountains near my house.” He was silent for a long moment, then said: “Talia fell from them and died.”
His hand tightened on the book, as though attempting to crush it. “A preposterously stupid way to die!”
He turned his head away, eyes closed.
Tander stared at him, his throat tight with sympathy, but nevertheless, he felt a little dismayed. That’s all this book is, he thought, a fairytale? The final wish of a dead child?
He gave no voice to his thoughts, however, but remained silent.
“Talia had this book with her when she died,” Reeves went on. “I should have taken it from her body then, but it did not occur to me at the time. In my panic, I flew away, like a coward, and left her there.
“I almost perished in the mountains, but was found by a Sky Legion patrol, and taken back to Sundown Peak. I refused to return home, or to tell them anything about myself, so they took me in.
“I threw myself into combat training, desperate to forget about Talia. I hated her. I despised her for the pain she had caused me!”
You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.
His eyes glittered on the edge of furious tears. “My hatred encompassed all Humans. I could not stand the sight of them. I could not abide their weakness, their clumsiness, their… wretched inferiority!”
He glared down at the book resentfully. “But worst of all, I hated that a Human had revealed my own ignorance.” He shook his head. “But as hard as I fought, I could not forget the Book. It wormed its way into my mind, like a disease, and would not let me sleep. It haunted me, every waking hour!”
His free hand clenched into a fist. “You must understand, Tander – I had to know! I HAD to know! I could not rest until I found out if the damned story was true, or if I had been played for a fool!
“I worked my way up through the ranks of the Legion until I was in a position to challenge the Commander to a duel. I fought him and beat him: easily. He submitted and departed with all the grace he could muster.
“With my newly secured power, I set about gathering information and putting the plan I had formulated in motion.
“I returned, finally, to my childhood home in the forest, only to find it abandoned and derelict, overgrown with vines and weeds. My parents were long gone. Making enquiries at local villages, I learned that they had taken themselves off to Caer Sync many years before, grieved at my disappearance.” He was silent for a moment. “I did not mourn their loss. It had been their decision to make, as it was mine to abandon them, to hide within the ranks of the Legion. I ought to have been proud of them, if I had remained an idiot, but I had come to think of them as misguided fools, who had raised me on a diet of falsehoods and fantasy.
“Talia had opened my eyes to the truth.”
He paused for a moment more, gathering his thoughts. “I spent a long time attempting to track down the Book, with no success. Eventually, I ended up at the University of Trystania, where I made discreet enquiries to the librarian there.” He looked up at Tander, a smile slipping onto his lips. “And where, of course, I met you.”
Tander glanced away, feeling a little embarrassed at the memory. He had, indeed. Tander had been a scholar before he had joined the Legion.
“In any case,” Reeves went on, “the librarian had never heard of such a book, but told me that a copy could be found in Grath Ardan, which contained every word ever written.
“I contacted Governor Merrill, and came to an agreement with her: find the wanted criminal Mekk’Ayan, and deliver him to her, in exchange for the Book.”
Reeves turned the worn little book over in his hands. “I had expected to receive a copy, transcribed from the main tome, but… to my surprise, the original version was there. By what means Talia’s book ended up in Grath Ardan, I cannot fathom, but it is irrelevant. I have it now!”
Tander stared at his Commander in the silence that followed, shafts of silver light and shadow passing over them as the windmill’s vanes continued to turn.
“But… there has to be more to it than that, surely?” he said finally, unable to suppress his doubt any longer. “You have dedicated your life, and the lives of the entire Sky Legion to… a legend?” He frowned. “I… had thought that it was… well, I’m not sure. A magic spell, perhaps? It is most definitely written in Ithillic, the language of sorcerers.”
Reeves just smiled at him, eyes bright.
Tander met his gaze. “What was the story,” he asked quietly, “that Talia told you?”
Reeves turned his eyes upwards to the stars, regarding their cold brilliance in the infinite depths above, as though he alone had discerned the truth of their mystery. “The story,” he murmured. “The story… is that everything we have been taught to accept, unquestioningly, the entirety of Angel society and culture… is based on a lie.”
Turning his head, he gave Tander a searching look. “Tell me, Tander. Do you believe in the Goddess?”
Unprepared for the question, Tander blinked and turned away uncomfortably, folding his arms and looking out over the torchlit town, listening to the coarse sounds of Human life filtering up from below. He wasn’t quite sure what answer Reeves was looking for.
“I… used to,” he replied, hesitantly. “When I was younger. But…” He shook his head. “Even as a child, I was too curious for my own good. I wanted to know how things worked. That was why I joined the University.
“I learned to read and write, and my parents were glad; my grandparents had been scholars – that was why they had left Arkana; they were ostracised, judged and derided, simply for seeking wisdom.
“I studied everything. Random things; it didn’t matter. I was hungry for knowledge. I had no real goal, other than knowing as much about the world as I could. I wanted to read every book in the library.
“But over time… something… changed…” He looked down at the bustle of Humans and animals in the square below, feeling sad.
“The more knowledge I gained, the worse I felt. I learned the truth of a great many things – including the improbability that a Goddess lived at the top of the Holy Tower. I appreciated that my worldview had been expanded, that I recognised nuances that I had not, before. But… every truth I uncovered chipped a little wonder, a little excitement out of existence. The pleasure of a mystery solved quickly faded, leaving something cold and hard and dusty in its wake. I walked back from every lecture I attended feeling somehow heavier. The consequences began to weigh upon my soul.
“I had sought enlightenment, but instead I found myself wallowing in cynicism.”
He paused. “Then one day, I entered the library and… you were there.
“I was astonished. I had never seen another Angel in the library before, let alone a soldier – or, indeed, the Wing Commander of the Sky Legion!” He gave Reeves a wry smile. “The librarian would not tell me what it was you had asked for, of course. But there were rumours going around that you were planning something… extraordinary.
“I decided then that I no longer wanted to be a scholar. I wished to become a soldier. Like you, I wanted to bury my disappointment with physical prowess. It seemed simpler, more… tangible. Giving my life up in service to a cause that sought to make the world a better place with real action admittedly seemed, at that point, rather romantic, and preferable to an old and jaded future, dying with all passion for life leached out.
“And… naturally I wanted to know what you intended to do. I… wanted to believe in something, again.”
He fell silent.
“You are correct,” Reeves said quietly, after contemplating Tander’s reply. “The Goddess does not exist.” Straightening from where he was slouched against the roof spire, he turned to face his Lieutenant. “But Excelsior does.”
Tander looked up at him, perplexed. “The realm at the top of the Tower, beyond the Clock and the pool of silvertine? The place of eternal peace and happiness that we are supposed to ascend to when we die? Even if such a place were real – Caer Sync has been destroyed, and it is forever inaccessible.”
“No,” Reeves said, his eyes intense. “That is a legend. Excelsior is a real city, an ancient, lost city in the sky, the original dwelling place of the Seraphim! The beliefs attached to the Tower are a warped version of reality! Generations upon generations of Angels have willingly sacrificed themselves to fuel a magical construct. There were originally five Towers; the other four were toppled centuries ago by wars and various disasters, most likely because they were situated in lands controlled by Humans or Dragons.
“The purpose of the Towers was never about salvation or damnation! They were there to generate an immense Aegis over the entirety of Arvanor!”
Tander just stared at him in wide-eyed disbelief. In his years of research, he had come across vague mentions of ruined Towers, which were assumed to be lost holy places, without details of their purpose or origins. A tale such as this was greatly offensive to most Angel sensibilities. He knew now why Reeves had struggled to accept it.
And indeed, why he was very careful to keep it secret.
Reeves stepped forward. “Tander, the Seraphim themselves confirmed all of this to me! While I was trapped in the Sanctuary with that crow Mekka, the Seraphim showed me a vision. It was of an exquisite city in the clouds, all white stone and glass. The details matched those of Talia’s story exactly!”
He thrust the Book out suddenly, as though wielding a dagger. “This Book is a journal written by someone who has been there!”
Tander didn’t know what to say. Overwhelmed, he sat down on the parapet, putting his head in his hands. A mixture of emotions flooded through him, but something had ignited in his chest, something he hadn’t felt in a very long time.
Could this be real?! he thought, shaking with excitement. An ancient Seraphim city! Full of undiscovered artefacts, treasures, knowledge… What if there was a library, a repository of experiences collected by the Ancients? The revelations that could be uncovered! Talia’s Book was only the start…
The possibilities took his breath away.
This was exactly the kind of thing that Tander had been searching his whole life for!
But… why was Reeves so interested in such a place? The man had no interest in history, and wasn’t particularly motivated by wealth.
There was only one thing in the world that Wing Commander Re’Vier really cared about…
“There is something in the city that you want,” Tander mused aloud. “Something that will give you power…”
Reeves put the Book away, carefully, in his pocket. “I have not told you everything,” he admitted, “but I think it prudent to keep the rest to myself, for now.”
A vague chill passed through Tander, a slight tickle of warning at the back of his mind, but he brushed it aside, too wrapped up in a glow of hope to care. His thoughts were racing.
“And what of your plan for unification?” he said. “I thought you wanted peace between all the nations of Arvanor? How will finding Excelsior help you to achieve that?”
Reeves walked over to the parapet and folded his arms, staring out over the town. “Arkana is broken,” he replied quietly. “Fleetfleer destroyed, Caer Sync toppled. The Angel race has been decimated, left homeless, lost.
“I have found an ideal place where they may rebuild their lives.”
Tander glanced at him, raising an eyebrow. “With you as their new leader, presumably?”
Reeves just smiled.
That explains why Governor Merrill was displeased with the plan, Tander realised. And why the Emperors weren’t…
“But you started this quest long before this disaster. You could not have known Caer Sync would fall…”
“No, indeed,” Reeves replied. “But Angelkind has been in decline for a long time, thanks to their stupid adherence to self-sacrifice. I always intended to change that.”
“By revealing to them the truth about the Tower?”
“Yes.”
Tander frowned. “But even if you could convince them of something so radical, and win them over, what of the other races? Is your intention to rule them as well? Some Sirinese may accept that, but none other. Not without a large-scale war of subjugation…”
Reeves’ eyes burned. “There will be no war.”
“Then how…” Tander looked at him, and gave up. The Commander had closed himself off again, and Tander sensed that he would receive no more answers that night.
He supposed that Reeves’ trust only extended so far.
A long silence fell between them. Tander rubbed wearily at his eyes, feeling strangely burned out by all that he had learned. The sounds from the square below had petered away, the music from the tavern ceased. The windmill barely turned, now, as the wind died. The night grew late, and warm, and still.
But there was a final question that he needed to ask.
“Why have you chosen to tell all of this to me, Commander?” he asked softly. “Why me? Why now?”
Reeves remained silent for a moment more, then he said: “You are a valuable member of the Legion, Lieutenant Tander. When we first met, I thought you an irritating scholar. You had never even looked at a weapon, yet you came to me begging to join the Legion. I allowed you into our ranks because I happened to be in need of a literate person at the time.” He closed his eyes. “I could not have guessed that you would become one of my finest, most skilled and capable men, regardless of whether or not you could translate the Book.”
Tander flushed with the compliment.
“But recently, I have sensed that your loyalty to the Legion was slipping. So I have offered you a little trust, a little… motivation.” He raised an eyebrow. “You were contemplating leaving, were you not?”
Tander bowed his head in shame. Reeves was very astute.
“I… it’s just that…” he swallowed, feeling his newfound spirit sinking again. “I made a bond with Li and I… I already feel that I have broken it. My word is… important to me, Sir…”
“Well, put your mind at rest, Lieutenant. The wretched little pigeon is following us.”
“She…” Tander looked up suddenly at Reeves, catching his breath. “What?!”
Reeves was smirking.
“How long have you known?”
Reeves waved a hand nonchalantly. “Oh, since I ordered you to leave her behind…”
Tander stared at him, shocked. “You… knew she would follow? You were testing me?!”
“I wanted to see how you would react. But I did not expect you to tear yourself to pieces over her. If my men are not capable of carrying out their duty, then that is a problem.”
Tander looked down at his bare feet, unhappily. “I apologise, Commander Reeves.”
Reeves gave an irritated sigh. “I don’t need an apology, Tander. I need you to pull yourself together!”
“Y-yes, Sir.”
Reeves rubbed at his forehead. “When that girl finally sees fit to show herself to you, tell her… ugh,” his face twisted, as though the words he spoke were sour. “Tell her… that there is a place… in the Sky Legion for her.”
Tander was speechless.
“If she is going to be snooping about at our heels, I would prefer it if she were somewhere I can keep an eye on her. But make no mistake!” Reeves whirled on him. “Li is your responsibility! If she does anything to jeopardise our mission…”
“She will not!” Tander was on his feet, his eyes bright. “I will ensure that she does not, Commander!”
Reeves held his gaze, his eyes sharp and hard, then turned away, looking suddenly weary. “I shall relate everything I told you to Nix, when he has sobered up,” he said quietly. “Do go and drag him away from that horrid drinking establishment, will you? I’d rather not have to shovel him out of there on a cart tomorrow morning.”
He stepped upon the parapet.
“Reeves,” Tander said suddenly.
Commander Re’Vier hesitated, one foot on the edge, his wings curving white arcs of light at his back, like pieces stolen from the moon.
Emotions careened through Tander, too numerous and impossible to express. He fought the tears that rose to his eyes, closed them because he could not tear them away from those glorious wings. A wild urge to throw himself on his knees at Reeves’ feet overcame him, but he resisted it.
He knew what he wanted to say, yet couldn’t; mere words seemed inadequate. Finally he managed, in a whisper: “Thank you.”
Reeves was quiet for a moment. Then he replied: “Good night, Tander,” and launched himself off the watchtower, gliding away into the night.
Tander watched him go.