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Recovery 8

Had the old building always been so scary? Cold sweat was slowly dripping down his back. He had returned to the place his journey had begun in earnest, the Feathery Delight.

He knew what he had come to do, but now that he was here, standing before these doors, it was harder than expected. Struggling to work up the courage to take the next step forward, he shifted from one foot to the other. That was until he felt a hand on his shoulder, giving him a light squeeze of reassurance. He took a deep breath to calm down. A quick look back at the smiling girl that had given him so much, and he was off, ready to face his judgment.

Every step felt like a hundred. Slowly, Kael's feet brought him closer to the door. Through the old windows, Kael could see the happy atmosphere inside. People were eating and drinking with smiles on their faces. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught the tall figure of Sean as he brought food to the tables. How would they react?

The door handle felt like it weights hundreds of kilos as he pressed it down. Uncertain, Kael stood at the open door. Fear and shame drove him back, making him want to run away again and hide behind the pretty walls of the Junge estate. That part of him wanted nothing more than to forget the last few months and return to the simplicity that was last week. Sleeping, training, and cooking dinner were his tasks. He could deal with those. Confronting not just Barbara and the others of the restaurant, but also seeing Martin and Andrea again was something else.

Still, a second, stronger part of himself drove him forward. Here was his atonement. He wanted, needed, to keep his friendship with Martin and Andrea. The Feathery Delight deserved his apology and so much more. If they allowed him, he wanted nothing more than to return to working here. Although it felt preposterous even to himself, he also wanted to go to school as Barbara had promised. Did he deserve any of those things? No. But he wanted them nonetheless.

Another step. He was inside. Sean had already seen him, Kael was sure. What would his expression show? Would he be surprised to see him? Would he be angry? Would he even care? Which one did he want to see? The moment of truth came faster than Kael expected. Maybe he had loitered too long, but Sean was suddenly right in front of him. "Kael, thank god you are fine. We did not know what to make of your sudden disappearance, and when you didn't return, we became worried."

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Tears dropped from Kael's eyes. He had expected them to yell at him; To politely guide him out and tell him to never come back. Why did it have to be compassion?! He could not stop crying and only noticed later that Sean had guided him into the kitchen. Just as he was calming down a little, Edward's voice reached him: "Good, your back. Now I don't have to do this shit alone again. Better tell me next time you want a break, ok?"

"Is it true?! He is back?" Another voice joined the cacophony, and Martin's arm slung over his shoulders before Kael could react. "Don't you ever do something so stupid again, you hear me? We looked for you. Days and days on the streets, only to have Barbara tell us that you are injured but alive. ALIVE?! What did you do that being called alive is positive?" It took hours for Kael to calm down. Andrea had joined them at some point, looking pale but happy. Food suddenly appeared on the table, and their impromptu gettogether turned into a party.

They were just done with the food when Kael tried to speak. "I, I am so, so so sorry. Thank you all so much for caring about me. There is no way for me to repay all that you have given me, but I will try. This is not... There was so much going on in my head, and I..." He shook his head. This was not coming out the way he wanted it to. "No, none of that matters. What matters is that I will do better. I know that I will still make mistakes, and I can only hope that you all will be there to correct my course. That is if you all can see past my actions and give me another chance. Please, I know that I don't deserve it, but this is all I ever wanted. Please dont let me throw my only chance at redeption away!"

The room became quiet while Kael made his desperate plea, and stayed that way for a long moment. From somewhere behind him he heard her warm voice, and, in the end, it was Barbara that broke the silence. "Are you sure that is what you want? From what I heard, the young lady of the Junge family was prepared to provide you with a cushy life. Why return here?"

There was no need for him to think about her question. It had been the same one that Sarah had proposed to him when he first mentioned his desire to return to the restaurant. He looked the older woman directly into the eyes as he said: "Because this is where I belong."