Twelve years later
Escaping from reality was a lot harder than it looked, but I never expected it to involve climbing out of a window.
“Lady Arwyn!” my personal maid, Ginny, called out. The sound of her knocking on the locked door of my bedroom interrupted my focus. My fingers grasped at the green vines of ivy that trickled down the sides of the stone walls. They made perfect ladders for escaping.
I grunted, one boot-clad foot over the edge of my window. “I’m a little busy at the moment!” My long brown hair fell over my eyes, forcing me to blow a puff of air to get it out of my face.
At twenty-one years old and with only a few days left before my Fate Ceremony, all I wanted was to ignore my responsibilities.
“Lady Arwyn, please. Your mother has been looking for you all morning.” The door burst open, and Ginny gasped at the sight of me halfway out the window, as if this were a new occurrence. “What on Solarelm are you doing?”
“Not escaping, that’s for sure,” I mumbled.
Ginny ran to the window, reaching out a hand to help me back into my bedroom. “Honestly, dear. If you’re sneaking out again to see Lord Raydir, you can tell me. You know I will cover for you.”
“As you always have, yes. But I don’t want you to get in trouble. You’ve done so much for me, Ginny, and I shouldn’t even have to sneak out to see him.” I bit my lip. If my mother found out that Ginny had been helping me meet Raydir, she would surely fire her.
“I know this feud has been difficult on you.” She reached up to brush away a few stray hairs from my face.
I scoffed. “That’s an understatement. Our fathers used to be such good friends. And ever since it was clear a romance started to develop between me and Raydir, things have changed.”
“I know, dear.” She patted my hand lightly. “But you cannot blame yourself. Your father and Duke Phillips began a disagreement long before you and Raydir fell in love.”
I tugged at my loose braid. Just adding fuel to the fire with the accident. “Well, it doesn't matter. Tell my mother I’ve gone riding.”
“And you’ll be back for lunch before you go to your lessons later?”
Not a chance. “Of course. And thank you. For everything you’ve done for me.”
Ginny smiled. “It is my pleasure, my dear.”
My heart twisted with guilt. Ginny didn’t deserve this. She’d been nothing but a friend to me for so long. She was someone I could trust, and she would risk getting fired just so I could have happiness. I gathered the skirts of my burgundy riding gown and ran out of my room, praying that I would be able to slip past my mother and the palace guards with no issues. Luckily, my mother was in the midst of preparing for my courting that would be taking place quite soon, so she was otherwise preoccupied. She always took major events seriously, and my Fate Ceremony was going to be no exception.
With only a few minor missteps, I made it to the barn and saddled up my horse, Majesty.
“Hey, bud. You ready for a ride?” I murmured, brushing his tawny coat.
Majesty snorted happily in response. I hoisted myself over his back, pressing my heels into his sides slightly, and taking off at a slow gallop. Rolling green hills dotted the horizon with snow-capped mountains far into the distance. My hair bounced behind me on my back as Majesty leapt over a downed tree and continued on his way. His hooves pounded against the ground in time with my heart beat. Years of meeting up with Raydir had taught me that the quickest way to our meeting spot was on horseback instead of taking a carriage to the edge of Runswick, the district between Gwyniar and Alvenora, and walking from there.
On any other day, I would take a slower ride to soak in the beauty of the nature around me. Today, I was desperate to meet up with Raydir. After weeks of nothing, he had slipped me a note the other day between classes that asked if we could meet up at our favorite spot. It wasn’t a subtle move, but it was our way of communicating when we couldn’t be together.
As I reached the bridge in the woods that separated Gwyniar from Alvenora, I let out a tiny whistle: two short notes followed by two long notes. It was soon followed by a reply whistle—one long note, three short notes—and a black stallion appeared at the edge of the bridge, its rider flashing me a grin that made my heart beat faster than a horse’s hooves on the ground. His rumpled white shirt billowed in the breeze.
“M’lady.” He greeted me with a nod, pulling his horse to a stop and jumping down.
“Ray.” I slid out of the saddle and walked over to him where he pulled me into a hug. “The usual spot?”
We walked our horses in the direction of the clubhouse we used to play in as kids. It had the perfect amount of seclusion to keep us away from the dukedoms when we needed an escape. The place of our first kiss. Our first real kiss. Our first date, however secret it may have been at the time. Our first ‘I love you’s.
“It’s still as beautiful as ever,” I mused, taking in the lush green scenery and the delicate purple flowers growing around the moss in the undergrowth. The clubhouse was too small for us to fit in now, but it held so many good memories, we just couldn’t let it go.
“Indeed.”
I turned and found Raydir looking at me with admiration. “I meant the scenery, doofus.”
He grinned. “I know, but you’re more beautiful.”
Rolling my eyes, I leaned up to kiss him. “You never cease to amaze me with your cheesiness, Ray.”
“I’m glad.” He held up a basket. “Lunch?”
My face lit up. “Certainly. What did you bring us?”
“The usual. Turkey and cheese sandwiches.” He reached out to brush away some stray hairs that had escaped my braid. “And I managed to sneak some wine from the kitchen.”
“Clever.” We sat down on a blanket that Raydir pulled from his satchel and began to eat. “So how are things in Alvenora?”
Raydir shrugged. “Same old, I guess. I spend my days shadowing my father before gallivanting off to combat practice.” He looked down at his hands. “There’s a lot more to running a dukedom than meets the eye.”
I couldn’t even imagine. “Have you had any time for your art?”
“Not as much as I would like. And every time I get even a few minutes in my studio, something else comes up with my father.” He reached into the basket for some crackers, rough calluses evident on his hands from his combat training.
“Well I’m glad you were able to make it out here at least.”
“Me too.” He patted his pockets. “I do have something for you.”
“Oh? Ray, you really have to stop buying me things.” I blushed. “You know how people will talk.”
Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
He kissed my temple. “As long as they’re saying good things.” He pulled out a sleek black box and opened it. I gasped as I saw the contents: a pearl bead hanging from thin gold chains etched into a delicate pattern.
“Ray, it’s beautiful.” I kissed his cheek. “Thank you.”
“My pleasure. May I?” he gestured to me, and I turned so he could clasp the chain around my neck.
“I love it.” I reached out my hand and intertwined our fingers together. We walked through the woods just enjoying each other’s company. The male birds sang their mating tunes, waiting for the females to respond. It was not unlike the courtship process in Gwyniar and Alvenora.
But as much as I enjoyed the limited time I had with Raydir, the moment wouldn’t last forever. As we circled back around to where our horses were grazing, something in the air changed. A feeling nagged at the back of my head that Raydir had another reason for today’s rendezvous than just a picnic.
“I’ve missed you so much.” My words cut through the silence. It was selfish of me and I knew it. But with my Fate Ceremony approaching, I wasn’t ready to lose him.
Raydir laughed. “Ar, it’s only been a week. Leaves you wanting more, right?” He wiggled his eyebrows up and down.
“Does that mean you did not miss me?” I teased.
He drew me closer, sweeping a hand over my cheek. “Of course I missed you.” The tone of his voice changed. “Things have been busier than I anticipated with my father.”
I curled my fingers through his hair. “So you’ve said. Your father really is doing everything in his power to keep us apart.”
He pulled away from me slightly, refusing to meet my gaze. “As my father’s sole heir, he wants me to focus more on my future right now.”
“And what do you want?” I frowned. He only circled around the truth when he was nervous. “Ray, what aren’t you telling me?”
He stroked his horse’s coat. “Arwyn, you know I love you, right?”
My heart lurched. “Yes, I do.”
“And you know Emilia?”
I nodded slowly. “What about her?” Emilia and I had been good friends and classmates for as long as I could remember. She was the only other person who knew how Ray and I felt about each other.
“My father wants me to marry her.” He turned back to me. “He knows how I feel about you, Ar, and I’ve tried to reason with him. I’m old enough to make my own choices, but because I’m inheriting the throne, he wants me to marry someone from Alvenora.”
“That’s not how the ceremonies work,” I protested. “What if Emilia is fated to someone else? Wouldn’t you be inevitably changing the future based on that anyway?”
“My father is certain that she won’t be,” Raydir replied. But even his tone of voice did not convince me.
“This is because of the feud with Gwyniar, isn’t it?” I tried not to let the hurt and jealousy seep into my voice.
Raydir shook his head. “I don’t think our family tensions have anything to do with it. Sometimes in politics…there are things that must be done for the good of the country. Courting Emilia is the only way to ensure that neither of us end up with the Wolf Curse.
I shook my head. It didn’t make any sense. A person’s Chosen at their Fate Ceremony was someone handpicked by the fates themselves. “There is no way to manipulate the outcome. Ray, you know what going through with marrying Emilia means. You’ll end up invoking the Wolf Curse either way.”
“I trust my father’s instincts. He has powerful friends,” he argued with a firmness in his voice. “But there is another reason to go through with this.”
“My Fate Ceremony.” I swallowed a lump in my throat. “I have my own future to choose. But the only future I want is with you. We made a pact, Ray.” It was childish and selfish of me, but I didn’t want to lose him. Having to marry a complete stranger at twenty-one wasn’t something I’d ever wanted.
Raydir started pacing. “My father means well, Arwyn. He knows that if you and I end up together, I’ll be cursed. The chances that I’ll be your Chosen are slim. He wants to protect me from that. I’m supposed to run the dukedom some day.”
“So what are you saying?”
He ran a hand through his hair. It was a light brown but in the sunlight it shone with a golden hue. “I’m saying that this decision is about protecting us. I’m sure your parents feel the same way about wanting to protect you. They want you to go through with your Ceremony because that’s how it has to be.”
“For my parents, it’s always been about the feud. Why do you think they forbade me from seeing you five years ago? They loved you until…” I didn’t even want to think about it.
Raydir gazed into my brown eyes and stroked his fingers across my cheek. “They’re worried about what will happen because they know your leaving is inevitable. With Arabella, they had no way of knowing.”
Except that I knew, I thought to myself. It was something that had eaten away at me for the last five years. Guilt. Fear. I could’ve told them the truth.
“Arwyn, your family wants to protect you too,” he continued, taking my silence as a cue to keep talking. “Don’t you think what happened would want them to protect you?”
“Yeah.” I kicked at the ground with my boot. “Regardless, it’s also our decision. It’s our lives.” I hated that this is what it all came down to. The guilt had built up for five years, and I couldn’t resent my parents without feeling that guilt weigh down on me.
“We have to do what’s best for ourselves and for our dukedoms. None of this is ideal, Ar.” Raydir squeezed my hand.
“I want more than anything to be with you. No matter the consequences,” I said softly, chewing at my bottom lip. “I know you would be throwing your life away for me, and I don’t want you to resent me for that.”
We didn’t even know the extent of the curse. All we learned in school was that the Fate Ceremony was created to maintain order in the dukedoms. Those who went against it would meet a fate worse than death: the Wolf Curse. Of course, no one really talked about those who rejected their Chosens, so we had no reason to assume that it wasn’t true. We knew that some owned shops in Runswick; others took on smaller jobs here and there, working as scribes or servants. And those who would rather seek refuge elsewhere went to Darqua, which we learned from a young age was the Wolf Valley. We were never allowed to go. We were never allowed to mingle with those who had chosen the Wolf life.
“I know.” He pulled me back toward him for a kiss. The type of kiss that meant he wouldn’t dare be with another woman, at least not the way he was with me. The type of kiss that had me grasping at his shirt for balance.
Yet where on any other day, I would’ve found comfort in his touch, today he seemed to be fading away.
My mind raced a mile a minute. There had to be another way for us to be together.
“What about Darqua?” I asked when we broke apart.
Darqua, the hidden valley, was the settlement for anyone hit by the curse who had been cast out. It was the only place I could think of where we could seek refuge with others who had also rejected their Chosens. If that’s what it came down to.
Was that our only alternative? Leave everything we’d known behind just to have a chance to be together?
It sounded better than never being able to be together.
Raydir blew out a puff of air. “I don’t know, Ar.”
I shook my head. “This can’t be the only option. Give in to the patriarchal system or be forced to live a life with the Wolf Curse? We’ve been practically courting each other for years. Why is now any different?”
“Maybe we should think about this a little more. But we will figure something out.”I searched his green eyes for more answers; they held an emotion I couldn’t quite place.
He kissed me again. “For now, I better get back. And you should too.”
Reluctantly, I followed him back to the main part of Gwyniar. When we arrived at the gates of my home, he slid out of his saddle and took my hands in his. The guards by the gates regarded us, specifically Raydir, with caution. Ever since the tensions between our families started, we couldn’t get past the gates together without drawing attention, so he would always have to say his ‘goodbye’ here before leaving.
I gave them a look, one that they’d grown to understand as: Let me have my moment with Raydir.
It made my heart swell with happiness any moment I had to spend alone with him. He was very well-liked by many in Alvenora and Gwyniar alike. At school he was usually surrounded by both men and women who wanted to either be his friend or chat him up. Raydir gave into the popularity because, well, as the son of a duke, one had to be a ‘people-person.’ It helped that he was naturally charming.
Although, those moments we spent alone together never lasted too long. A trio of women passed us, whispering and giggling when they saw Raydir. They exchanged nods of acknowledgement with him and he smiled in return.
“Will I see you again before my Fate Ceremony?” I asked when he turned back to me.
He grinned. “If I say ‘only in your dreams’, is that too cheesy?”
I laughed. “Extremely. But I like it.”
He reached out and kissed my hand. “Until we see each other again.”
Upon my return, Ginny greeted me in the Great Hall, a look of concern etched on her face.
“Lady Arwyn, your mother has requested to see you immediately. I tried to reason with her, tell her you were out riding, but she sent one of the stablemen to find you and when she couldn’t—”
“You didn’t tell her about Ray, did you?”
Ginny opened her mouth to reply, but it wasn’t her voice that came out. “She didn’t have to.”
I turned, wincing at the sight of my mother at the top of the stairs. “Hello, Mother.”