The air around me finally calmed down and I could inhale freely. Standing alone in a damp, dark room it finally hit me. A small fire was carefully dancing in the other end of the room, its warmth coming short to reach me.

My body shook involuntarily. Mostly because I was cold and tired, but the reality crushing fast and hard on me did not help. My day just kept getting worse and worse until it seemingly couldn't get any lower. I lived at that point right now. The worst of the worst. The lowest of the lowest. Just my kind of day.

When we finally arrived to Calvenbosch, the princess was immediately surrounded by her attendants and they rushed off somewhere warmer in a buzzing cluster of handmaids. The rest of the journey was quiet and uneventful. We, the princess and I, rode in a bit of an awkward silence. The princess, I think, was a bit ashamed of losing control previously. As for myself, I was more concerned with my own well being than my reputation. Finally being able to sit down and relax in a warm carriage, my defenses let down a tad and my mind wondered off to the same place where it was wondering this whole time.

And so we rode in silence.

The moment our convoy entered town, the carriage became the center of attention. It was already dusk by the time we arrived, so there weren't that many people in the street. Some waved, others looked in awe. Some child tried to run closer to get a better look, just to get reprimanded and scolded by his mother.

All in all, it wasn't as warm of a welcome as I would have expected for a royalty.

When the carriage stopped at the highest point of the small town, the princess was nearly carried away by her sizable entourage, Jerome mumbled something about reporting before taking off and Renig with Albert disappeared, probably returning to their duty besides the princess.

And so there I was, standing alone, surrounded by ominous men of King's guard. At this point, I should probably be grateful they decided to ignore me.

"Um, sir?"

The voice that brought me back from my thoughts belonged to a little girl, no older than nine or ten years old. Her sunset-red hair was tied in a bun that stood out even in the darkness of the hour. What was more, she was intently staring right at me.

"Me?" I had to make sure.

"You must be the new cuisiner, sir."

"So I've been told..."

Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

"The Queen wishes you to start preparing her dinner immediately," she said with a straight face.

"The queen?"

Before I could start despairing over the thought of the queen adding to the list of my troubles, I had to look at the little girl. She was desperately waving her hands, her face bright red. If I didn't know any better, I would've thought she was trying to scare off a fly.

"Aa........" she exclaimed.

"Yes?" I teased her.

"I-I meant the princess..." was all she managed to say.

"Is that so," I tried my best to keep a mischievous smile from forming on my face.

"Please, you can't tell anyone," she said with tears flowing down her face, still waving her arms in embarrassment. "Siiiiir."

"Oh? And what do I get out of it?"

"Ah."

She put her hand down the pocket of a small dress she was wearing, desperately looking for something she could trade for my silence.

"I don't have anything!" she cried out, tears rushing down her face like a waterfall.

"Then," I started. "How about I will keep my mouth shut, but in exchange you promise not to call me 'sir' anymore."

For a moment she just stood there, staring at me dumbly.

"Hmm," she finally said, casually stroking her chin with a finger, as if actually thinking over my offer. "I guess I could do that."

"Then it's a deal."

"Really?!"

"Yes?"

"Oh, thank you, sir!" she shouted, a bit too excited, going from tears to happiness in seconds, the way only children can. "Argh! No! I mean..."

"It's fine, it's fine."

"Then... Thank you!"

"You were saying?"

"I was? Ah, yes! The princess wishes you start on her dinner immediately."

The way she emphasized the word 'princess' right now made me think this wasn't the first time she made this silly mistake. And by the looks of it, not often did she get off the hook as easily as she did today. It may seem like a silly little mistake to make, but from what I've heard about the middleages, people were hanged for less. But then again, what do I know. This whole time I was shaking out of my shoes, stereotyping the people of this world, terrified I would be beheaded for a word spoken out of place.

What if I was being overly dramatic? What if this was more of a happy go lucky kind of fantasy world you'd see in an anime, instead of a grim dark G.R.R.M.-esque fantasy world I expect it to be?

One way or another, I would rather not have to find out with my own body.

"Amazing!" the little girl exclaimed.

"Uh? What is?"

"I've never seen anyone who could prepare food with sheer will alone ever before! Truly amazing!"

"No... Huh?"

"Are you a wizard? Can you really make food without even moving? "

"No. I'm afraid that's not the case..."

"Then you must be either very brave or very stupid. Still fascinating!"

She wasn't even teasing me. I was being mocked, plain and simple. The dumb look on my face must have been priceless, as the little girl laughed merrily.

"... You know, I really wish you would go back to calling me 'sir'."

Instead of an answer, she gifted me with a wide smile, showed me her tongue and ran off towards the nearest building, waiving me to follow. What a little troublemaker.

"Will you help me prepare the food, then?" I asked after catching up to her. She was moving briskly from one doorway to another, as if she was living here her whole life.

"Of course, of course," she offered. "But what do I get out of it?"

The mischievous little minx. And here I was, thinking I was the one doing the teasing here.

"So, what's your name?"

"Me? Call me Clem."