I don’t know what to write here.

- Kuya Tio on Questioning this top part of every chapter, Kuya Tio’s Guide to a Healthy and Happy Homestead.

I approached the storehouse with Saito, my coin purse safely tucked into a pocket. I didn't know how much this was going to cost me, but I knew it was going to hurt. The line that was forming up in front of the storehouse had a considerably more nervous aura than I would have expected. The people at the front of the line were muttering quietly to each other, and I had the weird sense that something was wrong. I looked to Saito, who looked back at me with the same confused look. One of the village ladies came out of the storehouse with a small sack cradled in her arms and tears in her eyes. Somebody asked her what was going on, but she just sniffled and shook her head with somewhat of a grin while walking off. Saito's brows were scrunched up in an expression of confused concentration. I felt like he knew what was going on, but didn't want to say anything. The next guy to come out of the storeroom lacked both the sack and the tears. He had an expression as though he wasn't sure if he should be happy or sad, and he just kind of looked at the line and nodded. He got heckled a bit more than the woman, but said nothing.

As the line moved forward, the next person came out with an excited grin plastered on his face and gave one word to everybody's stares, "rebate!" The muttering at the front of the line increased as we moved forward. Eventually, it was Saito's and then my turn to enter.

“Ah, Saito,” said Meng Su as he flipped a few pages in his book and started going down the line, "Six point five."

"What exactly is going on?" Saito asked as he watched Meng Su's wife dump 6.5 large scoops of rice into a bag.

"Tax cuts. Apparently. You can thank our New Lord," Meng Su said, pointing to a picture on the wall that looked like the same one I had seen most of my life. The Akumajin in the image was the younger version of his father, and I briefly wondered how they managed to get his image all the way out here already.

"He's not even king yet. Is he?" Saito asked.

"Don't know, don't care." Meng Su said, turning his attention to me. "Um, Han Yuji. Two."

Saito received his sack of rice and gave a short bow to the picture of the soon-to-be king before exiting the building. I followed suit and rushed to catch up with him.

"Is everything ok?"

Saito didn't speak for a moment. "We haven't had a rebate in over a decade."

"Well, that's good. Right?"

"Yes, it's just so unexpected. The taxes have been getting worse year after year."

It was an odd feeling to have people so confused about getting something back. This wasn't something I ever had to deal with in the city. Then again, most of my taxes were withheld from my income and I never really got to touch it. Here, I literally had to give at least a month's worth of work, and then everybody had apparently expected to pay more. I just had to shrug. I didn't have a frame of reference for this.

Similar to the summer festival, I met up with the Xiao household, and we walked to town together. For the most part, they all wore the same clothes, including the kind of stupid-looking square hat on Saito's head. The only real difference was that they were all dressed a bit warmer, and apparently masks were a thing for this particular festival. Both Yoko and Wei Lin wore a flexible beaded headdress that covered most of their faces, though I can only assume that the constant swaying had gotten annoying as both of them had taken the mask off very shortly after we started down the road. Yoko's little boy Ren wore a leather mask shaped and painted to make it look like he had a large mustache and a beard. It was honestly kind of hilarious.

Like last time, Wei Lin kept between me and everybody else, and like last time, we separated, with Saito, Yoko, and family going one way and Wei Lin and I touring the area. The Fall Festival had a slightly different vibe. There were still lanterns hung everywhere along with banners and streamers, and the smell of food was pervasive. Several small bands were playing various forms of music on multiple corners, and a large mannequin that resembled a carabao composed of rice stalks and thrush was being set up on the edge of town near the river.

As we walked through the streets, we were almost run over by some type of monster, a caribou skull on a pole that trailed fabric and streamers, weaving its way through the streets like some type of creepy undead bull-centipede thing.

"What the hell is up with that?" I asked Wei Lin because, like, what the hell?

"I think there's supposed to be some sort of story where one of the founders of the city plowed the fields with an undead bull. Originally, it was just two people running around with a skull, but at some point, a while back, a bunch of people decided they wanna be in on it, and the thing got longer every year," Wei Lin explained. Not that I quite understood.

There was a poke on my side and the familiar, "hey."

"Hey," I replied, as was both habit and the running butt of a joke that didn't really matter. Though when I looked down at Kaori, I was a bit surprised to see what was staring back up at me. Kaori was wearing an Ao Dai that was a light blue color and had a black lightning motif running across it. Strapped to her face was a leather mask of a catlike skull flaunting an evil grin, and while the mask was bone white, it too had the black lightning motif, continuing up from the dress and across the face.

Kaori leaned around me and looked towards Wei Lin. "Hey, Wei Lin."

"Kaori," Wei Lin greeted far less enthusiastically.

"Would you be terribly upset with me if I borrowed Yuji for a while?"

Wei Lin looked pained as her jaw worked back and forth for a few moments before replying, "Not terribly."

"Great. Thank you, Wei Lin," Kaori said as she pulled me. I hadn't quite noticed that Wei Lin had been attached to my sleeve, and she seemed reluctant to let me go, but did so as Kaori pulled me away.

"Uh-oh, looks like Wei Lin's got a thing for you," Kaori teased.

"Yeah, unfortunately for her, it's not reciprocated," I replied.

"Too bad. You're quite cute together. What exactly do you find unappealing?" Kaori asked.

"Well, for one, she's boring," I stated.

Kaori laughed, that brilliant laugh of hers that ended in snorts. Hell, I was growing to really like that laugh. "Well, I suppose that would be a drawback to the whole farm girl thing, right?" she said.

"I don't know. Yoko seems perfectly fine. She's basically the same farm girl," I responded.

"What do you mean?"

"Out of all the people in this town, I have known Wei Lin possibly the longest, and I literally know nothing about her, or I know everything about her, and it's extraordinarily boring. Like she has no opinions and no sense of humor, whereas Yoko does have opinions and does have a sense of humor. And I honestly know more about Yoko, though I've only talked to her like a handful of times."

"Huh, yeah, I guess it does seem a bit odd."

"So where are we going?" I asked.

"Over by the games," Kaori said, dragging me further down an alley and into the other street where there were indeed booths set up with different various games. A lot of it seemed to be designed for young children, but there were a few more skill-based things that some of the older guys and girls were testing out. It was a bit odd because they didn't require money and they didn't have prizes. Literally, the only reward was whether or not you got your name up on a score board, which for a small town on the edge of the empire, I guess I could understand. It must have bragging rights or something.

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Kaori and I played a few of the games, got something to eat, and listened to one of the bands play for a while before one of the shows on the big stage in the center square started up. As we watched the show, with Kaori pressed into my side, her mask tied to her waist as it had been uncomfortable and impossible to eat with, I looked down into her brown eyes. She looked back up at me and smiled.

"Something wrong?" she asked, slightly teasingly.

"I love you,” I thought, but had the good sense to say, "No."

Kaori must have recognized something in my face because her eyes drifted down to our interlocked fingers and then back up at me. Her smile turned into a thin line, and her ears drooped. "I've got some things I need to do. I'll see you later," she said, and with that, she pulled away and walked off into the crowd.

I know I fucked up. We had been spending a lot of time together because honestly, I got along with her and I liked her. Though our time spent was always with the understanding that we would never end up together and thus would not develop feelings for each other, which was clearly just a bullshit excuse. I didn't really know about her, but I sure was feeling something.

I spent the next couple of hours wandering around in a funk, partially angry, partially anxious, and partially just confused and conflicted. I followed along with the crowd as most of the village seemed to be heading towards the edge of town, towards the Carabao effigy. It was at this time I saw one of Kaori's friends who made eye contact with me then split off in a different direction as soon as she noted my existence. That was strange, and I honestly couldn't remember which one that was, but either they were all avoiding me or she went to go find Kaori and tell her where I was located. I partially was hoping it was the second, but even then, I'm not certain that would be a good thing.

Someone lit the effigy on fire, and it seemed like the whole village was singing some variant of a vaguely familiar song that I could only assume was local. That's about the time when I noticed Kaori coming at me. A good part of me was happy to see her again. The rest of me noted the expression on her face and was absolutely terrified.

"Hey," she said.

"Hey," I replied.

She reached up with both hands, grabbed my head, and pulled me down while simultaneously pushing herself up on her toes until we locked lips in a brief kiss where clearly more was wanted, but it didn't happen. She pulled away and looked at me with sad eyes. The expression made sadder by the angle of her ears.

"Is that hello or goodbye?" I wanted to kick myself for asking. I already knew the damn answer. Part of me just wanted the explanation from her out of some sick sense of satisfaction.

"Goodbye. We're getting too close. It's just gonna hurt more later," she said as she started stepping back.

I wanted to be so pissed at her, though I knew she was right. She gave me the briefest of forced smiles before turning away and disappearing back in the town while I watched her go, the light from the burning effigy behind me casting long flickering shadows. Why did all these festivals suck?

I didn't see much reason to stick around, so I started heading home, stopping on the bridge on the way out like I always did so I could look down into the dark water and watch the reflection of the moon play off the ripples. All these festivals sucked.

I don't know how long I had stood there before someone came up beside me and started climbing the rails to look over the edge with me. I didn't pay any attention to the kid for a few minutes before a question with Wei Lin's voice attached came from practically right next to my head.

"You okay?"

That kid, of course, had been Wei Lin, which kind of made me feel bad for thinking of her as a kid, but she was short. "I guess Kaori and I broke up," I admitted.

"I didn't know you were dating."

"Yeah, well, we kind of weren't."

"How can you break up then?"

"It's complicated," I replied, and she did not respond back.

A minute or so later, Wei Lin climbed further up on the railing, turned herself around so she could sit on top and locked her legs into the middle bar so she couldn't fall backward into the water. For another few minutes we just sat there, me leaning against the rail looking into the water, and Wei Lin sitting on the rail looking in the opposite direction. She didn't say anything, and neither did I.

"Why did you hang around her if you already knew it wasn't going to work out?" Wei Lin asked.

"I don't know, because I liked her."

"I don't get it. Is Kaori that attractive?"

That honestly seemed like an odd question, but I answered anyway. "Kaori is not unattractive. There's nothing specifically special about her, kind of plain, really."

"So it's just that you liked her as a person?"

"Yes."

The water beneath us babbled as the occasional person walked across the bridge heading home, and the moon slowly shifted in its course across the sky.

"Am I attractive?" Wei Lin asked.

I had a sigh. I really didn't get what the hell Wei Lin was on about here. "Yes, you're very pretty."

"But you don't seem to wanna hang out with me."

OK, this conversation was just getting weirder. I knew Wei Lin had acquired some type of thing for me, but the questions themselves didn't seem to be exactly adding up. "Well, it's not always about being attractive, Wei Lin."

"Is it sex?"

"No, what the hell, Wei Lin?" I finally looked up at her to see her glaring at the decking of the bridge.

"Yuji, I am broken."

"You're not broken, you're just…"

"No, I am broken. I just can't get people. You're all just so weird. Why am I not good to hang around?"

"Because, Wei Lin, you have no personality."

"Explain. Please."

"Explain? You have no opinions. You have no desires. You don't seem to like anything. You don't ever joke. You're very good with all the mundane things that need to be done. But honestly, Wei Lin, I've seen you practically every day for the last six months or so and I know more about your sister, and I've only had like, a handful of conversations with her. I know her favorite food. I know what plays she likes to watch. I know her favorite season. The only thing I know about you is that you got mad at me because I had originally thought you were fourteen." The tone I used might have been kind of harsh, but I was already upset over the whole Kaori thing and now I was dealing with whatever this was.

I turned around with my back against the railing and faced the same direction as Wei Lin, though she had her gaze plastered toward the ground, the deck. Her mouth opened and closed several times as though she had tried to say something but was completely uncertain as to what words should be coming out.

"Well, I, uh," she started before giving another long pause. "How does a person be more interesting?"

That was a weird question. Wei Lin was being way more weird than usual. Beyond that, I didn't know the answer to this. "How do you be more interesting? Do you enjoy anything?" I asked because generally, people enjoy something and they tend to like to talk about that something. Sometimes that can be interesting, much in the way that most people thought Yoko had the best dumplings, that came with a story about how she used to make dumplings with her mother. Well, I personally didn't find dumplings interesting, beyond eating them. Yoko had a passion for creating them that could, in some ways, be considered interesting.

"I like doing beadwork," Wei Lin said, fingers brushing against the beaded mask she had been wearing that was currently hung around her neck like a particularly uncomfortable necklace.

"You made that?"

"Yes."

"Did you make the necklaces you usually wear?"

"Yes."

"What about Yoko's earrings?"

"Yes."

I threw a hand up in the air in a half-hearted expression of exasperation. "Well, there you go, Wei Lin. That's possibly the most interesting thing you have ever told me about yourself."

"Why is that interesting?"

"Because it's something about you that you actually enjoy. I didn't know you made that stuff. I just assumed that you liked it and therefore bought it. I assume you could tell me how you make them."

"Yes."

"Yeah. Well, there you go. Most people like to talk about the things they like to do. You've never done that. Ever."

"Oh?" There was a long pause before Wei Lin continued. "You're right. I can't believe I haven't noticed."

I had to shake my head. This conversation was weird. "Wei Lin, I'm gonna go home now. You wanna tag along?"

"Yes." There was a pause before she tried again. "Yes, I would enjoy the company."

The words seemed stilted and forced, and when I looked at her, she gave me a smile. It wasn't a particularly good smile. Like her words, it seemed kind of forced, and it kind of dawned on me at that moment that Wei Lin did not smile much, and when she did, it was very slight.

"All right, let's go," I waited for her to unlace her legs and climb down from the rail before starting off. "Can you tell me about beadwork? How do you do that?" I asked.

Wei Lin and I made the long trek home to Sharinzhen-4 and for a while she spoke about how to make beads and weave them together in various patterns. It was by far the most interesting thing Wei Lin had ever talked about, mostly because she seemed like she knew what she was talking about, and I had no idea how beads were made in general. Another thing of interest specifically to me was how mechanical the explanation seemed. She didn't have any particular enthusiasm in her voice like you would expect. The words she was using implied that she enjoyed it, but her tone seemed like she was just stating something mundane, say like the procedure that the village used to thresh, de-haul, winnow, and polish rice. It made me wonder if her normal tone was somehow faked. I couldn't see her that well via the moonlight, but as she talked, she didn't gesture. It seemed all a bit odd.

We said our goodnights once we arrived at her gate, the tones and motions quickly returning as if the person I had been walking back home with had not been Wei Lin. I walked into my house alone, managed to light a candle and get some heat going through the mass heater. It would likely make things a bit too warm, but if I didn't, things would get a bit too cold. I reflected on my day so far and how horribly wrong it felt. The thought of not seeing Kaori anymore hurt, and the weirdness with Wei Lin kind of just topped it off and made the whole day seem very surreal. I closed my eyes and, in time, began a rather uncomfortable and not very restful sleep.

Chapters after this…

15: Barbarians

Extra: A brief History of the Anorian People by Kuya Tio

Extra: Dedication