Chapter 75: Papers, Please

Gridlocked traffic was something I was all too familiar with, London having had the dubious title of the most congested city in the west. The average commuter lost close to an hour a day sitting still on the road, equating to a massive loss of man hours a month, a problem that several government commissions had considered at length but never quite managed to solve in all the decades I lived there. Compared to that, at least our caravan was moving, albeit in fits and starts over the course of the morning that quickly turned into the afternoon. We ate onboard, and there was no opportunity to take a break lest we lose our spot in the queue, but it wasn’t too bad as a one-off, and I whiled the time away by rearranging my inventory in fits and starts.

[Inventory

* 4.5” Knife (Smooth/Serrated)

* Blackened Bracelet: Hides your Name and Class when worn.

* Silent Night: The wearer’s actions are silent when they are not under observation.

* 5x Loaf of bread

* 5x Chunk of Salt Pork

* Water (100 oz)

* 10x Apples

* 10x Pears

* 10x Plums

* Butter (10 oz)

* Crate of Valkyrie Dust (200)]

I pilfered a bit more food, taking care to leave each individual crate showing the signs of my involvement, because in my experience inspectors liked to find something wrong to justify their own jobs, so it was better to let him catch the obvious sign of petty theft than to go digging any deeper and finding the contraband below. Along with this, I’d stored most of my equipment, leaving only my regular clothes and my mask on, as whilst the latter might raise some curiosity, the ability to speak to cats would probably be taken as a whimsical concession to Pumpkin’s presence akin to a luxury pet toy. Items dedicated to concealing my Class or stealth, on the other hand, would be an obvious sign of ill intent, so all of that went into storage.

[Class (Public): Level 4 Merchant]

I double checked my Class, before making a slight adjustment down, because I planned to keep to my known backstory and didn’t need people wondering how I was already at Level 4 before making a single sale.

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[Class (Public): Level 1 Merchant]

With all of that sorted, I headed back to my chair, pulled Pumpkin down from my head to curl up on my lap, and returned to the waiting game. Given how quickly we were advancing, there was no way the guards were inspecting every carriage to any significant degree, some form of detection magic notwithstanding. More likely than not, they were merely conducting spot checks on random or “random” vehicles, based on whatever criteria were deemed important to the overseers. If this was the case, then the best thing I could do for the cause was to stay relaxed, because unusual nervousness would be one of the biggest hints they’d be looking for. Conversely, if you put a big smile on your face and walk with confidence, few would be willing to get in your way; I’d done exactly this at every major airport in England, and only once did I get caught at customs with hundreds of euros worth of foie gras in my suitcase.

“What happens if we get caught?” Pumpkin asked. “That powder made me feel really good for a while, then it was morning and I wanted to die.”

I opened my mouth to respond, before thinking better of it, as I wasn’t sure where in the line we were and didn’t want to be overheard discussing the ins and outs of customs seizures. Pumpkin could only be understood through the use of my mask, but I had no such excuse.

[Pumpkin - Level 3 Cat]

“Well? What’s the answer?”

Looking down at the persistent name tag hovering over Pumpkin, I was about to tell him to leave it for later when I had a sudden idea. I’d never done this before now, since it had always been others making the request for me to answer, but I knew it to be a standard feature of the System, so it was all just a matter of finding the right mental prompt for it.

[Send Friend request?]

I got it after half a minute of focus, interrupting Pumpkin who had begun to scratch at my legs, as he often did when demanding my attention. He froze up, his eyes unfocusing and staring off into the distance in the way characteristic of someone immersed in his System. I was somewhat surprised to see it work, but it only made sense; why wouldn’t Pumpkin have access to the System when he was clearly an intelligent being, on par if not better than many humans I’d had the misfortune to come across back in the day.

[Pumpkin - Level 3 Cat added to Contacts.]

With that done, all that was left was for me to begin communication; the System had to be capable of that much, right? I focused on Pumpkin’s name on my Contact list, and sent a mental nudge down the line.

[Begin voice call?]

I shook my head, dismissing the prompt; that wouldn’t help anything, since my voice would still be audible outside of the System, though I noted the option down for the future in case Pumpkin and I ever got split up.

[Permissions insufficient for text messages. Please visit a System Priest to purchase an upgrade.]

“Ugh.”

My annoyance was great in that moment, reminded acutely of the microtransactions that had dominated the mobile market since its inception.

“Any chance you could give me permission without that?” I asked, knowing that we didn’t have much flex in our schedule to go visit the local clergy, not to mention that it was best to keep a low profile.

[Advancement: More, always more!

Criteria met.

You will Receive the following. Accept/Reject?

* System Permissions

* Direct Messaging, Chat Groups

* Covenant

* Freeman: Class will be lost if you ever willingly worship a God]