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39 - Scientist Best Friend

“There should be a seizure warning when entering this city.” I ranted to Deen, my head hurting from the array of lights piercing even the tinted windows of Deen’s car. “Just hang it under the ‘Welcome to Las Vegas’ sign or something.”

Night had fallen in the city of enhancement and bioaugmentronics, but downtown was brighter than daytime.

Towering billboards covering entire sides of buildings presented advertisements non-stop. Colossal neon signs in various colors were violent rainbows assaulting the eyes. As if those weren’t enough, many buildings sported projectors that generated holograms over the city streets. Joining in were flocks of drones, also displaying ads, like capitalist locusts.

A sleek quadcopter drone even approached my side and showed a promotion for discounted breast augmentation.

What was this piece of metal shit saying to me? If this weren’t Deen's car, I would’ve punched through the window to destroy it.

“At the least, the city should have regulations to limit the ads.” I waved my hand to shoo the drone away. “This is just too much. And the drones seem to scan the passengers of vehicles, don’t they? I feel like that shouldn’t be allowed.”

“I hear some cities have ordinances on that,” said Deen. “But not Vegas. They won’t curtail such a huge business here.”

“Invasive ads and the insane light pollution. Maybe I should go door-to-door and gather signatures for a petition to ban those? I’m a resident of Vegas.”

“You? Introvert-you will comb neighborhoods for signatures?”

“I’m introverted, not shy. A huge difference. And I’m not going to be alone gathering signatures.”

“Do you want me to come with you?”

“Yeah,” I said, giving her a thumbs up. “With you, we’ll secure the male half of the population. Tens of thousands of signatures. We’ll get rid of these ads soon enough.”

Deen chuckled. “That’s not going to work. People will think I’m accompanying my little sister selling cookies for her school project.”

“Hey, I don’t look that young.” I reached for Deen’s leg to pinch it, but she caught my wrist.

“Behave, little sister,” said Deen with fake sternness. “If not for Gabe, I would’ve pressed the pedal and bumped the car in front of us.” She placed my hand on my thigh and put her hand over it.

I didn’t react to her touch. She was high on the fumes of her victory after our little battle, and nothing I’d do could get to her. Best bide my time for a comeback. Just have small raids here and there, but take care not to lose. For now, I’d lick my wounds—licking got me into this situation—and ignore any provocations. I feared that I might’ve created a personal-space-invading monster.

“Ugh, we haven’t moved for the last ten minutes,” I said, ignoring Deen, scratching the back of my hand with her pinky.

What should’ve been a forty-minute drive from my condo to the airport during off-peak was now running for an hour and a half. And we still hadn’t arrived at our destination! The airport was so damned near; planes were taking off and landing in the distance. I could probably reach it with a twenty-minute brisk walk.

But if I got out of the car, I’d receive, full blast, the lights and noises. I might transform into Blanchette and destroy this city. Las Vegas was long overdue for an Adumbrae attack.

Of course, I wouldn’t actually do that.

Seeing Blanchette return would just make Deen happy. I had enough of my best friend’s weird side for a day.

Or forever.

“Don’t worry; we have plenty of time before your mom’s flight arrives,” said Deen. “Even if it takes another hour to reach the airport, we’ll just be on time to pick up your mom.”

“We could’ve left earlier and avoided the rush hours if I didn’t have to clean your mess.”

“My mess?” Deen reached down my thigh and tried to pinch me.

She had difficulties doing it because I wore jeans. I didn’t need a prescient Guardian Angel to tell me that Deen would do this at some point during our ride. She ended up grabbing my inner thigh and squeezing it. Again, I didn’t react. She didn’t remove her hand, continuing to massage me.

“It was your mess,” she said. “Blanchette’s saliva.”

Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

“Oh, really? It couldn’t have been all saliva. You—”

“Yes, I did. But I didn’t, um… how do I say this? My shorts weren’t even wet down there. The mess is all yours. And what will you do if we reach the airport a couple of hours early anyway?”

“Dunno. Hang out at a restaurant? A café? Lots there. Way better than just sitting here, getting bombarded with ads.”

“Close your eyes to shut out the lights. I’ll play melodic music so you can sleep. I’ll wake you up when we get there.”

“No way. You might do something to me while I’m asleep.”

Deen faced me with scandalized eyes. “Excuse me, Miss-Stick-My-Tongue-Down-My-Best-Friends’s-Throat?” She squeezed my thigh again. This was normal between us now. “You have the audacity to accuse me of doing something to you?”

“Oh…” I sank into my seat. “You’re still angry about that?”

“Do you know that feeling, like hours after swimming, you still feel like you’re underwater?”

“I barely swim. But I think I remember—”

“I can still feel my throat stretch,” she said, rubbing her neck. She coughed a couple of times.

“Um, super sorry. I did apologize to you earlier. You seemed to enjoy—”

“That doesn’t make it okay!” she yelled, evidently angry for real. I knew that was the wrong thing to say. “Got that, Ms. Erind Hartwell?”

“Yes,” I squeaked. Part of me did feel guilty about what I did to her.

“It-it was the heat of the situation. I wasn’t thinking straight, so I allowed it. I just thought it… it won’t reach that, um, point. Like, that was way out-of-bounds, and you were hurting me. Majorly messed up, Ms. Erind Hartwell.”

“Yes, Mom,” I grumbled.

“Also, I’m not buying your Adumbrae-made-you-do-it excuse,” said Deen, punctuating every other word with a squeeze of my leg.

“But it’s the truth,” I said, half-chuckling. Deen knew that I knew that she knew I was lying about it.

“I’m going to report to your mom what you did to me.” She was smiling now while facing the road. The traffic started moving after an eternity. The car was automatic, so there was no gear stick. Her hand was free to remain on my leg while her other hand was on the steering wheel.

“Ha-ha, very funny,” I sarcastically said. “I know you’re just messing with me now. Mom won’t believe I’ll do anything like that, even if you took out the Adumbrae parts. But I’m seriously super sorry about it. It won’t happen again, I promise.”

Deen shrugged. “It can happen again sometimes.” She stuck out her tongue at me.

“Amber Deen Leska!”

“Kidding! I’m supposed to be prim and proper, yet, you’re turning me nasty and degenerate. Jeez, Erind, you’re being a bad influence on me.”

“I’m not doing anything,” I retorted. “I’m going to sleep now so I won’t get accused of all sorts of stuff despite being innocent.” I pretended to fall asleep, but not for long. “Ugh, even if I close my eyes, the lights still penetrate through my lids.”

“Penetrate?” Deen mumbled. “You’re an expert on that, huh?”

I ignored her snide comment. “Do you have a sleep mask here or something? A pair of shades might work.”

Deen finally stopped molesting me as she reached for the glove compartment. “Nope. I do have this marker. If you have your glasses with you, we can color them with this and, voila, instant shades. You don’t need them anymore, right?”

“That’s a legit suggestion?” I said. “I won’t do that even if I have my glasses with me.” Deen believed that becoming an Adumbrae, and gaining regenerative powers, had cured my eyesight. I also told her that I’ve kept it a secret from Mom that I’ve started wearing glasses in law school.

“You’re cute in glasses,” Deen offhandedly said. “The nerdy look is pretty trendy nowadays.”

“Is this some fantasy of yours?”

“No,” she pointedly replied. “I’m just saying you look cute in them. I’m straight… as far as I know. I’ve had boyfriends. Nothing serious, but I think I’m—”

“And yet, you came,” I said, almost inaudibly. I was unsure if it was wise making that comment or if I’d be on the losing end. Regrettably, that was a loss for me, though I controlled the battle.

Deen was silent for a few seconds. I thought she didn’t hear me. Even better if she was ignoring my comments. It might mean she was retreating to her lady-like shell. Unfortunately, neither was the case. “Since we’re stuck in traffic,” she began to say, “what if we do some… stuff?”

“I don’t like the way you say ‘stuff.’ We should set some boundaries. I wanted to talk to you about this back at the condo. What we did was—”

“You want to set some boundaries after licking the inside of my esophagus?”

“Wow, no need to describe it graphically,” I said. “Are you a scientist now? I can’t even recall what an esophagus is. Anyway, yes, we should set boundaries—”

“Says the loser,” sang Deen.

“What did you say?” I snapped.

She turned to me with narrowed eyes. “Afraid that I’m going to do to you what you did to me?”

“I sense you have some devious plans in your blonde head. But I’m going to warn you, Deen. Don’t make noise later while we sleep in the same bedroom. Mom’s room is just beside it, and she’ll think—”

“Her daughter is getting some fun tonight?” Deen said with a smirk.

“I’m going to throw you out the window if you pass the border of pillows I’ll make later.”

“Oooh, so scary,” she said. Then she laughed. “I’m just joking, Erind. I’ll only make my move when you’re completely asleep.”