I peeled myself off the beanbag that I had been laying on and grabbed a wet wipe, giving the headset a quick cleaning. The beanbag also got a light spritzing of the fabric freshener spray that my girlfriend whipped up, infusing the alcoholic lemon sent into the air.
After Paul had gotten gamer rash on his face, none of us skipped equipment maintenance.
“Yo, Alice! We good for dinner?”
No response. I walked to the other side of the room and saw the headset planted over her dark hair, her body laying limply on the couch.
Ding! Dong!
“Bzzzz… I have a delivery for Alice from Mister Fang’s Chinese Palace. Bzzzz.”
I opened the door to greet the deliveryman, and slipped him some cash from our tip box. The bag of food smelled amazing. Seemed like Alice had ordered an aromatic spread for the night. I buzzed on the TV to creep on what she was doing while unpacking the food. She was about to complete an RPG that she had been working on for a few weeks.
“HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN?! I AM THE CHOSEN ONE. I HAVE THE POWER OF THE INFINITE DESPAIR DRAKE ON MY SIDE. NOOOO!!!”
A man whose sharp features were contorted in extreme confusion was lying on the ground, the point of view directed downwards at him. An outstretched middle finger shot in from outside the frame.
I hit the remote to swap the view to a better perspective.
A blonde human girl in a massive, grimy, suit of armor was standing over the man. It turned out that the other hand was covering the girl’s laugh as she haughtily laughed.
“You fool! I am the great Alice, slayer of gods and kings, crusher of hopes and dreams, the supreme ruler of this world and the beyond!”
I scrolled through my phone and opened the Equilibrium mobile app to browse the new tooltips and flavor texts that I had unlocked.
“It’s not possible! A frail mortal like yourself could never strike me down. Who do you represent? Who has possessed you? Which divine being has fallen to foil my brilliant plans?”
The Punch and Swing skills I had used in my duel were also default skills. I vaguely remembered some error messages, but it was easy enough to connect that with the fact that I had not “unlocked” Rage at the time. There were some pretty sick damage modifiers, but the one time use for something like punching was not something I particularly desired. It was definitely the type of thing Alice would enjoy though.
“No divinity possesses me. I am simply Al Ice, the human girl who took down the main antagonist, all by herself!”
Mana had a pretty low regeneration rate while Rage had none. Probably to distinguish them in some way, since outside of the flowery description that the Physical Trainer had given me, I couldn’t pinpoint a difference. I tapped on the empty slots below the two resources, hoping for some kind of easter egg, but sadly no luck. The menu did jiggle a bit, which meant that there was probably more Primary Resources to discover. Or the app had a bug. It was always a coin toss.
“…how many hours of hitting the same tree it took? This game is NOT friendly to solo on! I can’t believe that the only cute girl in this game had the WORST STATS, WORST GROWTH, AND HER MAIN PLOT LINE WAS IN THE FINAL ARC OF THE STORY. How is that possible?!” I glanced up to see Alice’s character repeatedly stomping down on the downed man’s groin. She usually kicked the generous assets of female final bosses in a similar fashion when she was this frustrated at a game.
This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.
Last thing to check were the titles. Surprisingly, they did refer to their useful effects, assuming they had any, but still left out specific numbers.
Slime Killer - I: If you didn’t get this title first, then you really rushed to the town. Weaker slimes will be more wary of you, and stronger slimes will be more aggressive. For some reason, equipping this title seems to attract more attention.
Weapon Breaker - I: You broke your weapon? Don’t worry, everyone does that. In fact, equipping this title means your weapons will break more easily now! And do a bit more damage when they break.
Training Merchant - I: You sold a few items and got a taste of Merchantry! Equipping this title will show off your interest in Merchantry.
Trash Hoarder - I: Why did you pick that up… Equipping this title does nothing but shame yourself. The higher the level, the more trash you had at one point.
Brutal?! - I: The System was impressed by your brutality. Equipping this title will make you look slightly more crazed. Who knows what the future levels will do.
Taste of PvP: You fought a PvP battle! Although it’s not required for optimal gameplay, we definitely suggest trying this feature out more!
Scared of Death: You chose to surrender in a PvP battle than take the final blow. Not the worst decision honestly – it’s scary to be killed, even when it’s not real.
Loser: You lost for the first time in a PvP duel. Keep your chin up, you can still improve!
“Brr br BRRRRR!! Br BRRR, Br br br br!!!” The epic bellows of triumphant trumpets suddenly blasted through the speakers, snapping me back to reality. I grabbed the spritzer and the wipes, returning to Alice as she blearily rose back up into reality.
“Morning Is, thanks for setting up dinner. How long were you waiting?”
“About when you started bragging while roleplaying your character. Don’t worry, I had to check up on some updated info while you were finishing up.” I handed her the cleaning supplies, which she lethargically took.
“Sorry you had to see the part after that. It’s been a bit since I got so annoyed by a game.” The lemon scent floated back into the air.
“Seemed cathartic enough. You all good to join me and the boys on Equilibrium?” Alice grabbed my outstretched hand to pull herself up, using the momentum to give me a quick hug, her usual icy skin sapping the heat from mine.
“Should be. I don’t want to see another dragon for at least a month. Is Paul’s cutie girlfriend playing? We had a coffee date planned, but she had to rain check me because Paul’s guild wanted to prep for something. I figured it was for Equilibrium, but I forgot to ask.”
“Ah, think so. I saw them both logged in whenever I checked.” I sat down at the dinner table and picked at the sweet and sour chicken.
“Figures. Guess that's what happens when you’re the guild master.” Alice sighed and crumpled into the chair across from me, swiping the container of sautéed broccoli.
I chatted with Alice about the information I found about Equilibrium while we ate her. Her nose scrunched up at the comment about grinding being potentially less rewarding, but her eyes lit up when I mentioned the Rage primary resource.
“I’m not sure if there are any super secret hidden quests. I did get a random quest from the blacksmith, but it wasn’t like he gave me anything special, just a fetch quest. The guild given ones seemed less annoying.” I bit into a pork bun, savoring the fact that it was still warm.
“Eh, I almost prefer it if there aren’t any. They’re super good for lore, but I’ve never seen the rewards handled well. Sunbeam Painter basically died out because they ran out of absurdly broken hidden classes.” Alice grabbed the other bun and inhaled it.
“That’s fair, but I’m sure there are going to be some broken custom skills that pop up.” I finally managed to grab some broccoli from the ravaged box.
“Nothing new about that. As long as there’s a variety and no exclusiveness, then there’s no problem. Finished! I’ll get started on the dishes.”
I cleaned up the remaining rice and vegetables, bringing the dirty plates to the sink and cleaning up the table.